Where am I going

Where am I going? Why am I running? Why am I so scared?

Scared? Me? Not me! I'm the Sorceress' Knight!

No I'm not! I'm a traitor! I failed her and I failed my…friends?

You failed me.

Quistis?

You failed me.

How did I fail you? I saved you…

No. I died. You didn’t save me. You couldn’t save me.

What are you talking about, Instructor? I have Full-life…

It won't work. You don't want to give life.

Of course I do. I don't want my friends to die.

Not even for power?

No, I-

Joined the sorceress for power.

I was stupid!

What if that opportunity comes up again?

With who? Lila?

Does the idea hold some interest for you?

No, I lo…Instructor, what are you doing?

This is what you've done to me. This is what you've done to me. This is what you've done to me.

NO!

* * *

“Martin…” Lila paused outside the door to her brother's office, uncertain of her welcome. His bright green eyes slid up to her face, and Lila tried not to shiver, as they pinned her to the floor.

“Yes?” He smiled and she relaxed. He was her brother again. Still, her step was hesitant as she entered and she stopped right inside the doorway.

“It's the two cousins!” Lila exclaimed, before wondering where she was going with it. Sighing, she shook her head and took a step forward. “I don't think they're cousins.”

“They're not.”

“I mean, the way Zell acted around-what?”

“They're not cousins,” Martin leaned back in his chair, a smile resting on his face.

“How do you know?”

“They're too close. They know each other's nuances to the tee.”

“But what if they grew up together?”

“In the mirror room, why did Zell-if that's even his name-look so hurt when she declared her love? Because he knew it wasn't him she was talking about?” Martin's smile widened. “They look a little alike in their coloring, but so do you and Sorceress Rinoa. Looks don't mean anything.”

Lila's eyes narrowed. “He said they weren't going to be subjected to any more tests.”

“They won't be.” Martin took in her surprise with no comment. “I've seen what I needed to see. They'll be wonderful workers.” He cocked his head. “Anything else?”

Recognizing a dismissal when she heard one but deciding to ignore it, Lila clasped her hands in front of her so tightly her knuckles turned white. “The…the…”

“Lila, I hate stuttering.”

“The drug!” she burst out. His gaze hardened. “Martin, why did we make it? We have the equipment to-“

“I told you never to ask about that, Lila.” He rose, voice lowering to a dangerous rumble. Her eyes widened, and she took a step backward.

“Martin, I-“

“Never, Lila.” He began to cast, and Lila's magic-adjusted eyes recognized the gathering power as Ultima. Oh Hyne, he really meant to hurt her!

“No!!” she cried out, falling to her knees and throwing out her hand, as the green light swirled around her. Immediately she felt the nothingness recede as the Wall surrounded her, and she straightened, staring at Martin as Ultima continued around her. Their eyes met and there was a burst of flames. Lila blinked.

They were back in his office and chair was burning with red fire. Calmly, Martin reached out and picked up a pitcher, dumping it on and dousing the flame. He raised his eyes to hers. “This will never happen again.”

Lila fled.