Well,
it's the moment you've all been waiting for, the unveiling of that great code
of ours. It's a little on the serious side, but the guy was psycho, so it's
an interesting read, enjoy!
The Malice Constitution
2002 Version 1.0
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SECTION 1: The Big Picture
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Some of you new people might be thinking to yourself: Hey! We get to be part of
an honorable clan, with traditions and morals!
Hey! Guess what? Fuck you! Runescape is a game, not some sacred practice. We play
this game to win, to kill, to make names for ourselves. If you can't understand
this, leave! Cold feet are not tolerated around our house my friend, and if you
don't have what it takes, you know where the back button is.
Still with us? Good! We need people who are willing to help us achieve the highest
status in all of Runescape, who won't go running to mom when the shit hits the
fan. Eventually, we WILL be the best, without and rival or peer. We will be rich,
and we will be famous. Hell, when we reach our level of superiority, we'll have
our own clan of groupies following us around! If you aren't part of the team,
you're part of the target!
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SECTION 2: The Units
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===BEGINNING UNIT===
Trainee:
This is ground zero. As a trainee, you ain't shit. Being a trainee basically means
a Captain has guaranteed you a position in a unit. Until you meet a units requirement
however, you are still just a little bitty trainee. Don't even think for a second
that we will make an exception for you. We all have to work our asses off to become
stronger, its just the way it works. If you can't seem to last an hour without
getting your ass handed to you however, feel free to join up with other trainees.
If you are good, or in some cases, horrible enough, you may be posted on the site
as a unit, but it won't be anything special. Trainee equals newbie.
===FIGHTING UNITS===
Mage:
Pull out your crooked wooden sticks and painted rocks troops! If you're a mage,
you have your work cut out for you. To be an official mage, your magic level must
not only be high, but also your most commonly used form of attack. Mages will
be assigned to help other units in combat should the need arise and basically
will swarm the enemy until they die. They might also be used as a primary battle
unit in a serious emergency... let's just hope it never comes to that...
Warrior:
Don't you just love the smell of spilled blood in the wilderness? If you do, chances
are, you were meant to be a warrior. To meet the warrior requirement, you don't
have to be pure. You just have to be able to fight! Your combat level must be
at least 15, and you will be in different units according to your fighter class,
and if you aren't sure what the hell I mean by that, shut the fuck up. Classes
are covered in the "Classes" section (go figure).
Archer:
A poor man's mage. Just because you can't afford a 100gp painted rock doesn't
mean you can't be a back-up fighter. Archers must be at least able to cause reasonable
damage to an opponent within their combat level. If you can't, well your ass isn't
very useful to us, is it?
Fighting Units in General:
All units can ask other fighting units to help them in battle for a fee if they
really suck that badly. They may also ask other units, such as cooks and thieves
to aid them. Each unit shall have distinctive uniforms in battle so we don't kill
ourselves...
Non-Captains:
All fees paid will be paid to the captain. This money will be used to hire other
units in battle as well as supply the fighters with proper equipment. The fee
will be 100gp-1000gp depending on the class of unit. This is so your unit doesn't
die because they were too damn poor to buy some food. If your captain spends those
fees on anything else, I will personally make sure that every member of Malice
hunts for their head.
Captain:
You must be in the champions guild to become eligible for the rank of Captain.
Captains will be appointed by the High Council upon meeting with them and receiving
his or her examination. Captains will be responsible for taking care of their
unit. This includes using the money given by members to feed and equip fighters
with weapons. Captains are NOT responsible for making sure each fighter has the
proper armor, as this would greatly increase paid fees to levels much too high
to pay. Captains also do NOT have to fight if they do not wish to, but don't blame
me if your people transfer to another unit.
===FIGHT SUPPORT UNITS===
Cook:
Fix us some chili dammit! Actually, the cooks are in charge of making sure everyone
stays alive at the front lines. Cooks can charge for their food if they wish,
but if it is at outrageous prices, kiss your ass goodbye. The last thing we need
is casualties cause some greedy cook thought it would be funny to charge 1k for
a fucking piece of meat.
Smith:
Ah yes, the art of metal. Of course, if you sign on as a smith, you probably aren't
going to be doing much fighting unless everyone else is offline. Smiths will be
in charge of supplying the troops with equipment. In an emergency, the smiths
will be required to give all units free armor, of the highest class. After the
war however, each member must return the armor to the smith, they won't be needing
it anyways. Otherwise, smiths may charge the units if they really want to, but
at simmered down prices. Oh yeah, if anyone pulls any "I died" bullshit, but really
didn't, and are just keeping their armor, High Council will contact the scammed
smith and we will ask him if HE wants to give your ass the boot or not. Translation:
Don't screw the smiths, it won't work.
Craftsman:
Gold, silver, diamonds... you just can't go wrong. Craftsman will be required
to supply the troops with amulets using the same guidelines as the smiths. Again,
any scamming inside the clan, and yo ass is grass!
Thief:
Plunder the enemy! Thieves know what to do. Shoot, loot, and get the hell out
of the area before you get caught. Thieves will be responsible for ripping off
the oppositions equipment right before we kill them. No sense in taking chances
right?
In General:
The supporters don't pay membership fees. The units must all revolve around a
certain level so production doesn't slow down because of a weak member (<--repeat
until you get it, lol). During battle, units should wear distinct colors so our
army doesn't mop the floor with them and can recognize them as a source of equipment.
Non-Captains:
Again, no member fees, just answer to your captain. Always have some spare equipment
put into a bank incase of a sudden battle and services are needed.
Captains:
Make sure to get your unit together when you are hired. Payment for a battle will
be evenly distributed among you and your unit. As captain, you will be responsible
for your unit putting out a sufficient supply of goods. Only champions are able
to become a captain.
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SECTION 3: The High Council
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High Council basically owns you. If you are given a direct order by High Council,
you must comply, or say goodbye. The purpose of a council is to prevent anyone
from trying to go on a power trip. Should this happen, the rest of the council
can give them the boot. High Council will consist of the founding members as well
as these following titles:
Grand Wizard: The greatest magic user in the clan, must be in a mage unit. They
will keep tabs on the wizard units and their stats so we know who not to kill.
Knight Champion: Greatest warrior in the clan, must be in a warrior unit. The
Champion will keep track of all warrior units and stats so no one in the clan
dies because they called another member a newbie.
Great Archer: Best archer in clan, must be in archery unit. Tabs on archer units
and stats, all that other good stuff.
Head Cook: Best cook, in a cook unit. tabs on units, stats, stuff.
Grand Smith: Best smith, in smith unit. tabs, stats, stuff.
-NOTE: By tabs, i mean how many units, tthe members in each unit, and the class
of each unit.
Commander of War: Decider of who we are at war with. The CoM will arrange the
bloodbaths and such. The Commander of War will work in conjunction with the Knight
Champion to make sure we always win our fights.
Treasurer: Makes sure all members are happy with the payment systems and that
all units are prosperous. We are a clan, and there's no way in hell we will be
known as a poor clan.
NOTE: In order to be a member of the High Council, you must be a Captain. No exceptions
At all.
Fighting classes are based on what metal each unit is capable of wearing. For
example, a unit may consist of people who can all wear up to adamantite. This
makes the unit, an Adamantite Unit. This allows the members to properly help each
other in battle to prevent unnecessary losses. In each unit, members' combat lvls
must also be close to one another. This prevents a group of regular members from
being unable to assist a pure warrior because they are totally different from
each other.
Also, archers and mages should also be within the same levels of their skills
so that they are able to support with the same level of power. A unit that is
close together, beats the shit out of everyone else together.
Cooking
Decided on the top foods able to be made, since there is no sense in paying high
prices to a cooking unit that can only cook meat... If in doubt, ask a warrior!
Smithing
This is based on the type of metal a smith is able to make a full set of, regardless
of how high a mining level you have. So a unit that makes steel armor would be
called a Steel Smithing Unit.
Crafting
Based on what type of goods you make, such as leather, pottery, or jewelry. For
example, a unit the makes jewelry would be a Jeweler Unit (no shit!).
Thieving
Based upon your thief level. All members of a unit cannot be anymore that 10 levels
away from any other member.
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SECTION 5: A Few Questions and Answers - Part I
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Question: Why would I want to pay to be in a fighting unit? what if i died? then
what?
Answer: Cause if you don't, we'll kick your ass! But really, since the class system
is used, other members of your unit can back you up. Not to mention if you have
a mage unit fighting with you, there's really no reason you should die unless
you are unless you are stoned and blind. The fee is mostly for food, which probably
won't even be needed.
Question: I'm a smith, why should I sell armour at a low price?
Answer: Same reason you wipe your ass with toilet paper. If you don't, you're
in deep shit. Besides, you don't have to pay fees, you are protected by the army,
plus, you are playing an important role in helping us become a famous guild.
Question: I want to become a captain, I meet all requirements, where do I go?
Answer: Consult the High Council, only 1 member of it is needed to sign you on
for captain.
Question: My captain is skimming money from the membership fees, what do I do?
Answer: Turn him in to the High Council, we'll deal with him.
Question: What if the Captain IS High Council?
Answer: He will be taken out of position by the other members of HC, case closed.
Question: A mage unit has gone rogue and is attacking my group! What can we do?
Answer: Rally every unit online and kill them until they run out of overpriced
rocks and crooked sticks.
More Q's and A's later on...
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SECTION 6: The Law
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Trainees:
To be blunt, you have don't have jack shit for rights. You only are able to join
a unit when you meet the requirements. The End.
Fighter Members:
You have to pay your captain his fee, or else he has the right to kick you out.
If your captain is caught skimming money, you have full authority to assign a
temporary captain and kill the other one until High Council dishes out their wrath.
On the battle field, anything lying on the ground is fair game, no matter who
killed who. You also cannot kill your team mates (you psycho bastard) or else
you are gone.
Fighter Captains:
You cannot declare any war against other guilds, but you may engage in small battles
as you wish. You must immediately boot any members who turn against our guild
as well. You are also obligated to make sure every member is in uniform. You will
recruit your own men, and can set your units eligibility. If your members do not
pay their full fee of membership, you must report them to High Council. If you
do not use your fees legally, you may either be discharged, demoted to member,
or demoted to trainee. High Council also has the right to put a target on your
head for the entire clan to shoot at, so please, don't break a simple rule because
you wanted a new rune long sword. You must also follow orders given by the CoM
at all times.
Support Members:
You will respond properly to your captains orders and go to any given point set
by him or the Treasurer. You have the do not have the right to refuse service
to any unit you do not wish to help unless they refuse to pay your fee, which
must be reasonable, or you may be subject to severe death syndrome.
Support Captains:
You will make sure your unit is in proper attire and acting in accordance to policy.
Any member not following your set rules are subject to demotion. If any of your
members are caught aiding the enemy in battle, they are to be executed and discharged.
High Council:
High Council may set battle points and certain fields of support production. High
Council orders are BEYOND contestation (so don't whine) and must be followed out.
However, HC members may vote in new laws and rules, and if the Commander of War
declares a war the rest of the council does not approve of, they may rule it out.
ALL major High Council decisions will be made with all members present at the
headquarters.
Unit HQ: Captain dictates a unit retreat or rally point to go to prior to a battle
or unit decision.
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SECTION 8: A Few Questions and Answers - Part II
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Question: A smithing unit is over charging me for armor, what do I do?
Answer: Turn them in to High Council, where they will be reviewed, and most likely
exiled.
Question: I just died and have no armor! My unit needs me! Now what?
Answer: Well get your ass in gear soldier! If you cant afford some backup armor,
consult HC, where you may be appointed armor from a smith. If HC cannot, or does
not grant your request, return to the battle, a fallen enemy may have dropped
armor.
Question: I'm the best cook, but I don't want to be in charge or all our cooks,
do I have to?
Answer: You sissy... Consult the rest of HQ, where the second best cook MIGHT
be chosen instead. WHY THE HELL.. would you give up this position though? I mean
really folks...
OK, now I know some of you jackasses don't know shit about the Runescape lingo,
but we here at Malice also use our own, so here is your guide to escaping stupidity,
consider it the Malice Glossary section. In no order:
HQ: Headquarters
HC: High Council
SHQ: Secondary Headquarters
UHQ: Unit Headquarters
Pure: Warrior with strength being much higher than other combat stats
PK: Player Killer
PKK: Player Killer Killer, also known as Bounty Hunter (BH)
BH: See PKK
Noob: A new player, we've all been called this at least once
Ammy: Amulet
Addy: Adamantite
Rune: A. Overpriced rock with a small painting on it
Rune: B. Runite
CoM: Commander of War
Lumby: Kinda new, from lazy people, its Lumbridge
K: Thousand, used commonly in trading
G or GP: Gold Pieces, refers to your money, moron
Hey You: Get called this, you should keep training
Lvl: Level, used when referring to stat levels, usually combat
Lesser or Greater: Demons, and if you don't know what it means, don't bother
Sapphy, Emmy: The Gems, good to get, sell to our crafters!
Stone Henge: Where Delrith hangs out
Jolly Boar: The Jolly Boar Inn, an important PK stop
Kite: Not a toy you dumbass, its short for Kite Shield
LOL, Tx, Np... : Im not explaining these, figure them out on your own. See Noob
I don't blame you if you didn't make it this far, but if you're here, whatever,
you aren't getting anything special from me, the rules are rules whether you read
them or not. These rules are into effect as of the year 2002. Maybe in the far
future, if we bulk out immensely this won't mean shit to any of you, but until
then, it's the mother fucking rules, so bow down and worship it baby!
With all that said, in the words of some guy off Quake II; Go fourth and kick
ass soldiers!