INSPIRATION FOR SALESPEOPLE: A COLLECTION OF HEARTWARMING QUOTATIONS TO MOVE THE SOUL

08/18

   Bleh. I let this slide once again, mostly due to lack of sufficient quotation material.  I'm gonna dip into the barrel of really lame quotes this week, drawing upon some of the twelve tips for better sales and the annoying quote posted in our lunchroom.  I hate that quote!

1. "It's not how many times you fall, but rather how many you get back up."

Deeper meaning:
Whatever life may do to you, it's not what it does that's important, it's how you deal with it that counts.  Doesn't that just make you go all warm and fuzzy? It's as though somebody's sitting up there with an eternal scorecard going "Hmm..  I had him pushed in front of a bus and he swore.  That's two points off for bad coping, and another ten for not surviving to become an inspirational paraplegic."  If I wanna deal with something badly, well then dammit, I'll deal with it badly.  None of this excellent coping for me. 

Getting hit by this lacks all the finesse of being hit by a bus, but will nonetheless leave you in several pieces.   

2. "Always practice efficient, courteous customer service."

Deeper meaning:
This completely forgoes any notion of metaphor and hammers home the message at the heart of everything I've ever written on a target card.  Like everything else, greed usually obscures this particular motive, but hey, at least they were warned.  Then there's no surprise when some old lady comes up whining about how rude and pushy the salespeople were. Then again, that wouldn't surprise me anyway.

There's just something efficient and courteous about sucking on someone's nipple.  So courteous and efficient, in fact, that I didn't bother deleting this picture.

3.   "Never buy flippers from this kid."

Deeper Meaning:
Seriously! Don't buy flippers from this kid!

Don't say you weren't warned.

4. "Wanted: A results-oriented, powerhouse of a salesperson.."

Deeper Meaning:
Damn.  There's just too much blatant stuff this week.  Oh, well.  No luck here.

These powerhouses are on a smoke break.  Leave them be.

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