Lesbos,

Animals,

Buffalo Wings,

Volvo's,

Yugos,

YM Magazine,

All of the faggots within bullet range,

These are a few of my least favorite things.

Ugly Bitches,

And 3 ton fat women,

Men who wear Speedos when I go swimming,

People who think I ignored Ashely at prom,

The fact we didn't win the war with Vietnam.

Teen age mothers,

Kidney and red beans,

"A" Team bumper stickers,

Corduroy blue jeans,

Private schools,

"Homey G's"

The Punks,

The losers,

And all the Brady's.

When I get the same e-mail letter 300 times,

People who think that their rooms better than mine.

Gilligan and the Skipper,

Mr. Howell and Mary Ann,

"Lovely" and Ginger

Cars from Japan.

The fact that most Canadians like to say "eh"

The fact that all the real wrestlers are stereotyped as gay.

All of the racist people on the face of the earth,

People who kill their babies before their birth.

People who lie,

Psychick friends network,

Porno's,

X-rated phone numbers

and the way my truck jerks.

I hate it whenever my pen runs out of ink,

And I hate people who think that I care what they think.

I hate it whenever a friend of mine moves,

And I have always hated Presley's blue suede shoes.

I hate everyone that hates me first,

I hate the feeling of when your dying of thirst.

I don't like school lunches,

Or their hot dogs colored green,

I don't like WCW,

Potatoes,

or Listerine.

From Regan to Clinton,

The presidency is a joke,

Screw all of Congress,

And I hate cigarette smoke,

O.J Simpson,

Marshia Clark,

And all faggot TV shows

Like "Are you afraid of the Dark?"

20/20,

A Current Affair,

Ru Paul,

Bob Saggot,

Rodman's hair,

I don't like long waits,

And talk show hosts too,

Oprah,

Riki Lake,

Or Phil Donahue.

I don't like "Grease",

Or "The Wizard of Oz",

I don't like nose piercings,

And I don't like the "Fonz",

I don't like Madonna,

Or Roseanne, that wench,

I don't like losing,

or sitting the bench,

I don't like Basketball,

Or running for fun,

I don't like wars,

Missles,

Or guns,

I really can't stand it

When a class makes me sleep,

Thursdays and Wednesdays,

Or the beginning of the week,

Dead lines and people,

Who act older than their age,

Overtime work

For minimum wage.

Family vacation,

Or any car ride,

The way summer air hits you

When you walk outside.

The Jenny McCathy show,

Singled Outs another,

Pee Wee Herman,

and New York Undercover.

I don't like QVC,

Or the Home Shopping Network,

Children of any type,

Cause they're all little twirps.

I can't stand it when

Unaccomplished people brag,

Yahtzee,

UNO,

Now the cat's outta the bag.

I don't like Cyber Pimps,

Or Cyber Whores,

Elevator music and

Most songs by the Doors,

I hate all hypocrites,

and those retarded mimes,

The band called Hanson,

And some songs by Sublime.

Thorns and sticker bushes really piss me off,

When doctors grab you and tell you to cough.

When my car is on low,

Or when I have little money,

Lot's of TV shows that think they are funny.

Your probably reading this saying "Wait a minute here…

I like some of this stuff "

Well, I have one thing to say.

"I'm sorry… that's tough."

I really don't care if you like it or not.

In fact here's some other shit I forgot…

Female body builders,

women weight lifters too,

It's sad they have more testosterone

than I do .

Those obnoxious little songs that Ice Cream trucks play,

The area club I belong to,

Country music is gay,

Those garbage truck pick ups at three in the morn'

and any sick bastard that likes child porn.

Kentucky Fried Chicken,

Salt and grease,

I hate Jigsaw Puzzles,

I hate every piece.

Can't stand AM radio,

I can't stand snow,

I can't stand "warm" cause it hot, yet cold.

Could I bitch more?

Probably so…

But no one would read a poem that just goes….

So in closing,

let me say this,

that the great fore fathers

gave me this right to bitch.

I can rant and rave,

and not even tell why,

you don't like it? That's O.K.

You'll eventually die.