Note From Santa --Author Unknown Merry Christmas! You think you got it bad? All night long, soot in the chimneys, smelly socks, cross dogs, shot at, mistaken for a stork, driving all night in the snow - damn near got killed by a 747. Mrs.Clause is pissed off cause I got in so late. Donner and Blitzen and Rudolph got the shits over Albuquerque and you should see my suit. The damn elves won't clean the sleigh unless I pay them double time. I'm so sick of cookies and milk, I could vomit. The only highball I had all night was when I slipped getting out of my sleigh. My prostate is giving me hell. I pee'd my pants at 20,000 feet and froze my ass to the seat. I'm allergic to pine needles. I itch all over and I think my hemeroids are back. HO! HO! HO! MERRY CHRISTMAS, your ass. |
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