"All life's answers are on TV."--Homer Simpson "All in moderation."--Chuck Yost "Never drink before noon."--Chuck Yost "It's noon somewhere in the world."--Chuck Yost "I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me." --Hunter S. Thompson "Insanity is a matter of degree."--Joaquim Maria Machado de Assis "Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is serious."--Unknown "I know but one freedom, and that is the freedom of the mind."--Antoine de Saint-Exupery "As your attorney, it is my duty to inform you that it is not important that you understand what I'm doing or why you're paying me so much. What's important is that you continue to do so." --Hunter S. Thompson's Samoan attorney "As far as we can discern, the sole purpose of human existence is to kindle a light of meaning in the darkness of mere being."--Carl Jung "An alcoholic is someone you don't like who drinks as much as you do."--Dylan Thomas "I've never had any problems with drugs, only with policemen."--Keith Richards "Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal, a good cigar, and a good woman-or a bad woman; it depends on how much happiness you can handle."--George Burns "I shall never permit myself to stoop so low as to hate any man."--Booker T. Washington "Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly."--Robert F. Kennedy "Theirs not to make reply, theirs not to reason why, theirs but to do and die."--Alfred Lord Tennyson "The superior man is distressed by his want of ability."--Confucius "The rich are different."--F. Scott Fitzgerald "The rich are different-they havy more money."--Ernest Hemmingway, in response to Fitzgerald "Blessed are the young, for they shall inherit the national debt."--Herbert Hoover "The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd rather not."--Mark Twain "Anyone who stops learning is old, whether at twenty or eighty. Anyone who keeps learning stays young. The greatest thing in life is to keep your mind young."--Henry Ford "If you are not allowed to laugh in heaven, I don't want to go there."--Martin Luther "A man may die, nations may rise and fall, but an idea lives on. Ideas have endurance without death." --John F. Kennedy "The rule of my life is to make buisness a pleasure, and pleasure my buisness."--Aaron Burr "When I got my first television set, I stopped caring so much about having close relationships." --Andy Warhol "Computers are useless. They can only give you answers."--Pablo Picasso "It is the very merit of the death penalty that its bark is worse than its bite."--Lord Quickswood "Remember always that all of us, and you and I especially, are descended from immigrants and revolutionists." --Franklin D. Roosevelt "What is better than wisdom? Woman. And what is better than a good woman? Nothing." --Geffrey Chaucer "You can get much further with a kind word and a gun than you can with a kind word alone." --Al Capone "We must never forget that art is not a form of propaganda: it is a form of truth." --John F. Kennedy "A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband." --Michel Eyquem de Montaigne "I love mankind, it's people I can't stand."--Charles S. Schulz "It's better to keep one's mouth shut and be thought a fool than to open it and resolve all doubt." --Abraham Lincoln "There is one way to find out if a man is honest-ask him. If he says yes, you know he is crooked." --Groucho Marx "The man who sees both sides of a question is a man who sees absolutely nothing." --Oscar Wilde "Nobody is hurt. Hurt is in the mind. If you can walk, you can run."--Vince Lombardi "The Irish people do not gladly suffer common sense."--Oliver St. John Gogarty "Work is the curse of the drinking class."--Oscar Wilde
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