the camera opens up outside Madison Square Gardens as a gold caddilac pulls up, the liscense plate reading "IKE"....the door flings open and from out of the car springs Isaac McBride, decked out in a velvet suit and brown fidora he makes his way into the arena...the crowd is buzzing.
suddenly Ike is cut off by a UWF crew member
IKE: Now what the fuck do you want honkey?
CREW MEMBER: Excuse me sir but Ex wanted me to give you this message.
the crew member hands Ike a note....Ike reads it and smiles
IKE: the Firm eh? Not a bad idea for a white boy.
Ike walks off as the camera cuts out......"Feul" by Metallica slams against the PA system as the fans rip the roof off the Garden....flashing over the screen are images of the stars that will pertake in "Last Dance"......the images fly at the UWFtron with the final image of the participants in the Champion of Champions match; Ellis, PJ, BBB, JD, Stanley, Stallion, Ike, Manson and Ex.
SHCHEEVONE: FOLKS!! IN 3 HOURS I WILL BE OUT OF A JOB.......but better yet i will NEVER HAVE TO SEE JASON WESSIN AGAAAAAAIN!!!! YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAW!
WESSIN: suck a cock Mitchel. At least loosing my job will let me focus on my true calling.
OVERVIEW: what would that be?
WESSIN: Duh? Porn featuring animals, midgets and strange vegitables.
OVERVIEW: I shoulda figured.
suddenly "Dirty South" by Goodie Mob blasts against the speekers as Isaac McBride makes his way to the ring, mic in hand to a mixed reaction
SHCHEEVONE: HERE HE IS! The 2 time Champ and former Prez who has taken the relms of the UWF for one last night here in New York.....!
OVERVIEW: We haven't seen Ike in 5 months, what could he have to say?
Ike grabs a mic
IKE: Shut yo punk asses up!
the crowd boos
IKE: Here's the deal, Ike took the reins tonight of the fed that IKE MADE! I whipe my ass with Evan Gambol, Ellis Jackson, Klyde MacIntyre and Thaddius Hubber.....cus e'rybody knows that the I.K.E. is the greatest damn president this fed has ever seen.
crowd boos
IKE: So tonight yal get to take a little trip in the time machine....back to when canolli was what Ike had fo lunch, BBB was still wearin Osh Kosh and suckin on his mummas tit....a time when JD was wearin Ike pajamas, and Stallion was milkin cows, and i aint talkin bout his mumma.....a time when Al Jameson's teeth was the only thing decayin on his body, and when the mension of the name Jackson made yal thinka a skinny kracker with too much money, who looks like a girl.
Well i guess somethings stayed the same.
None-the-less, i hope yal are ready to go BACK IN TIME.....to when IKE ran the god-damn shizzzzzow!Baaaleeeeeeeeeeeeeedat!
Ike tosses his mic to the ground as pyros explode...."Feul" attacks the PA once again as Ike walks out on a buzzing crowd
SHCHEEVONE: Ike tellin us he's gonna take us back in time....?
WESSIN: I think he's been hanging around McFly too long.
OVERVIEW: A return to the Isaacian age of the UWF tonight.....but what could that mean? What could Ike have in store tonight for the UWF's last dance?
suddenly "Sucks to be You" by Prozzak blasts as the fans get up and go buck wild. as pyros rip out stumbles the single most retarded man in UWF history. Former World Champ Simon Riggs walks out in a bath robe and one of those stupid looking pink fuzzy cowboy hats.
SHCHEEVONE: NO!!! IT CAN'T BE!?
WESSIN: That retard better not come over here.
OVERVIEW: Ike promised a trip back in time....well remember the UWFs first comentating team?
SHCHEEVONE: OH god.
WESSIN: *gasp*
OVERVIEW: May god have mercy on us all.
Riggs does some peculiar posing and then takes his headset
RIGGS: Well howdy guys....what did i miss.
SHCHEEVONE: Well, you were, uh.....gone for a year.
RIGGS: .....
OVERVIEW: Thats like 365 days.
RIGGS: ......bah?
SHCHEEVONE: ITS A LONG TIME.
LOOOOOOOOOOOOONG.
RIGGS: It sure is, but what were you doin lookin down there?
Are you one of them Homosapiens?
OVERVIEW: Thats a human being.
RIGGS: Hey, i never said they weren't......i was just wondering why that weirdo with the bad hair was looking at purple pudding slinger.
SHCHEEVONE: YOUR WHAT!? You know what.....i remember what we used to do in this predicament......
OVERVIEW: Break a bottle over his head.
SHCHEEVONE: No, move on to the next match....but good idea.
the crowd slams into approoval as "Take the Money and Run" blasts. JD Lawson walks out with Jack and Rico then pauses, World Title on his shoulder. He looks back to the runway.......suddenly "Superbeast" by Rob Zombie nails the PA. The King of the Dead walks out with his Harem of Scare 'em at his side....the crowd is going buck wild
SHCHEEVONE: ITS THE FORMER TAG CHAMPS!!! THRILLING AND CHILLING!! ZOMBIE IS BACK FROM HIS JAPANESE DEATHMATCH FED FOR ONE LAST NIGHT!!!
RIGGS: AH! Zombies! Where, where?
OVERVIEW: in the ring you dolt.
the crowd yet to stop buzzing when "N 2 Gether Now" by Limp and Meth blares.....the crowd goes even more buck wild as Johnny Blaze walks out tokin on his magic blunt.....he motions back to the runway and BBB strolls out for the 1st time in months to an absolutely buck wild crowd
SHCHEEVONE: All is forgotten tonight, the crowd LOVES BBB!!! Hes returned!!! and Blaze is all toked up!
OVERVIEW: We have 2 world champs in the ring, and we have 2 more still to come.
RIGGS: And you have one comentating.
WESSIN: I didn't know Mitchel won the belt?
"Higher" by Creed blasts as the crowd goes crasy, mixed boos and cheers for the God PJ Brown and TJ, as pyros explode around him and 30 foot gold flames rise......after a slight pause "Corperate Anthem" by Devo rocks the crowd as another mixed reaction pumps out for the former Prez. Ellis Jackson walks confidently down the runway
SHCHEEVONE: GOOD LORD WOULD YOU LOOK AT THIS MATCH! 4 world champs, 8 tag champs, IC titles, Extreme Titles.....these guys have had more gold than Master P's teeth.
OVERVIEW: except Blaze of corse.
SHCHEEVONE: Speeking of Blaze, he's in there against PJ and Damon Zombie....and there goes the bell. Zombie emediately attacks Blaze pinning him to the corner.....PJ taps Damon on the shoulder and NAILS HIM!! then a big boot by Blaze as he tags in BBB.....Breaker with a HUGE SPRINGBOARD CLOTHESLINE!!! PJ is down and Damon attacks BBB from behind.
OVERVIEW: no rust in there man...these guys are goin at it!
RIGGS: Guys? Goin at it?.....GROSS!
SHCHEEVONE: What a dink.
RIGGS: What a dink?! Are you sure you aren't a homosapien.
SHCHEEVONE: HERE COMES DAMON....tag to JD, armbar and Damon slaps BBB......both men grab a foot.....WISHBONE!
RIGGS: You wish for a bone? I think i'm gonna leave soon.
OVERVIEW: How could you guys stand this idiot?
SHCHEEVONE: Don't ask. JD workin on BBB, PJ is over.....BIG DROPKICK! Floored JD....a pin.............1............2..easy kickout by JD....BBB from behind on PJ!! SPINNING MULE KICK BY BREAKER! PJ ROLLS OUT OF THE RING!
OVERVIEW: PJ is trying to walk out of the match, ELLIS JUST GRABBED HIM FROM BEHIND AND TOSSED HIM BACK IN!!! Just like the old days.
SHCHEEVONE: HUGE SPINNING POWERSLAM BY BBB!!!! JD IS DOWN...........1...............2................NO! JD KICKS OUT! Now PJ is up.....KNIFE EDGE CHOP BY PJ ON ELLIS!!!? WHAT THE HELL!??!? THE G'ODD COUPLE FIGHTING ALREADY!
OVERVIEW: Folks, worry not, they were the tag champs and used to do this kind of thing.
RIGGS: my ass hurts.
SHCHEEVONE: JD tags in Damon Zombie who is at a distinct disadvantage in this match since he can't use weapons......WAIT A SECOND!!! DAMON ZOMBIE HAS A GOLF CLUB!....WHAT IS HE DOING!? The ref is stopping him.....
Meanwhile Ellis just tossed PJ into the guardrail.
OVERVIEW: You mean the "Rail of pain".
SHCHEEVONE: Please, i'm not an idiot. BBB just got to Blaze who flies off the apron and grabs Zombie.......
OVERVIEW: MY GOD WHAT A HUGE FACEBUSTER!!! OFF THE APRON !!! Blaze just went hardcore......AZombie just sprang up....he blocks a left hand......HE's GOT BLAZE BY THE THROAT! HERE COMES BBB!!!! Breaker with a huge clothesline on Zombie......
OVERVIEW: the Tritans looking on their game. Blaze in over his head, Breaker bailing him out.
SHCHEEVONE: Blaze grabs Zombie......BBB AND BLAZE WITH A DOUBLE GORILLA PRESS!!!
SHCHEEVONE: RIGHT THREW THE BELL TABLE!!!.....JD OFF THE APRON!!! BULLDOG ON BBB!!!.....JD THROWING RIGHTS AND LEFTS AT BREAKER.....the ref is trying to stop the melee......WAIT!
IRISH WHIP BY PJ.....ELLISJUST CRASHED INTO THE REF!!!....The ref is out.....OH GOD NO!!!! ZOMBIE HAS THAT GOLF CLUB.....
SHCHEEVONE: DOWN GOES BLAZE!
OVERVIEW: Zombie can go hardcore now....watch out!
SHCHEEVONE: JD AND BBB are battling up the ramp....BIG PILEDRIVER!!! BBB SLAMMED JD HARD ON THE RUNWAY!
Meanwhile......JUMPING FOREARM BY PJ ON ELLIS!!! ELLIS AND PJ GO OVER THE GUARD RAIL.....
OVERVIEW: Ouch.....WAIT!? Look at Zombie......he's got?
SHCHEEVONE: ....CHEESE-O-MATIC!!! GOOD GOD NO!!! BLAZE IS ABOUT TO GET SLICED AND DICED......
SHCHEEVONE: DAMON JUST NAILED BLAZE INTO THE RING WITH THAT GRATER.....here comes a pin..............1..................2................3..................4.........doesn't matter, there's no freekin ref.
BBB just busted in the ring......Damon spins around.....
SHCHEEVONE: BBB JUST SMOKED ZOMBIE WITH A CHAIR!!! Breaker setting up......BROKEN ELBOWS!!! NAILED IT!!!! NAILED IT!!!! ....................1...................still no ref............it doesn't matter how long, there's no ref. breaker just grabbed the ref and pulled him in.........the ref with a count................1.......................2...................JD STOPPED THE COUNT!!! JD GRABS BREAKER........OH GOD!!! THRILLING POINT!!! THRILLING POINT!!!! NAILED IT!!! JD WITH A PIN........................1...........................2........................
pyros shoot off
SHCHEEVONE: ITS THAD!!!! THADDIUS HUBER!? WHATS HE DOING HERE!?
OVERVIEW: HE's going right to the ring.....Ellis just turned and noticed him....he and PJ stopped attacking eachother.....Thad is just standing there as Ellis walks up to him.....PJ rolls in the ring. JD's count was stopped......PJ GRABS JD!!! BIG BELLY TO BELLY!!! NAILED IT!!!.......PJ CLOTHESLINES BREAKER OUT OF THE RING........HE NAILED ZOMBIE AND THEY CRASH INTO THE RAIL!!!.....PJ GRABS JD.....HANDS OF GOD!!! HANDS OF GOD!!!!......ITS LOCKED.......the ref is telling Ellis to get back to his corner.......Ellis moves to the corner....WAIT!!! THAD JUST LEPT UP ON THE APRON...THE REF IS PUSHING ELLIS TO THE CORNER.
JD IS TAPPING!!! JD IS TAPPING!!! THE REF DOESN'T SEE IT.....THAD IS UP....
OVERVIEW: THAD USED THAT BRIEFCASE OF ELLIS's!!!! PJ IS DOWN.....ELLIS JUST LEPT AFTER THAD.....PJ JUST ROLLED OUT OF THE RING!!!! ELLIS HAS THAD......PJ NAILED HIM WITH A LEFT HAND!!!! NOW ELLIS NAILED THAD....THAD GETTING THE BEATS!!!! He tried to screw PJ and Ellis one last time and is getting it for it........PJ GRABS THAD!!!! BIG POWERSLAM!!!.....He points down......Ellis grabs thad........HOSTILE TAKEOVER APPLIED!!!! HOSTILE TAKEOVER ON THAD!!! THE CROWD IS GOING WILD.....
OVERVIEW: LOOK AT THE RING!!!
SHCHEEVONE: BLAZE JUST ROLLED IN THE RING........HE's COVERING JD!!........the ref counts..............1..............................2.............................3!!!!! TRITANS WIN!!! TRITANS WIN!!! TRITANS ARE THE GREATEST TAG TEAM OF ALL TIME!!!! AND THE G'ODD COUPLE HAVE EXTRACTED THEIR REVENGE ON THAD!!! WHAT A MATCH....Thad is left for dead as the G'odd couple walk out.
OVERVIEW: Every team had this one won but it was the Tritans who pulled it out in the end and for that you gotta hand it to them.
WESSIN: Who cares, everybody knows the best tag team of all time are Slutty and Sleezy.
RIGGS: Amen to that.
"N 2 Gether Now" by Limp and Meth blasts as the Tritans walk out to a large pop
SHCHEEVONE: Folks are goin wild here, and i'm getting word we are going to take a trip in Ike's time machine.....back to his victory against the Crow for the World Title at Hardcore Delights.
SUPLEX THROUGH THE CHECK OUT COUNTER!!!! My god, Crow rolls ontop......1......2.....KICKOUT!!!
Crow is in command and is hauling Isaac over to a Sam Goody. Crow slams Isaac through a rack of Cd's and then picks Isaac quickly up. Crow with a DDT on the cd's! and a pin....1.....2....KICKOUT!!! Crow keeps up the heat putting the boots to Ike, he picks up Isaac and goes for a clothesling, ducked, Isaac with a kick to the gut and a spinning heel kick to the face!! Now Isaac jumps to the top of the counter.......LEG DROP!!! And a pin...1.....2.....KICKOUT at the last possible milisecond. Isaac is grabbing some CD's he's got a Marilyn Manson CD and just shatteder it over Crow's head....now he's got a Hanson Cd, he just broke that one over Crow too....now he's got a Isaac Hayes CD.....well he's pocketting that one, what a surprise.
WESSIN: Way to stick it to the man Ike.
SHCHEEVONE: the only thing you've ever stolen was a base in co-ed softball, and even that was by accident. Meanwhile Isaac is hauling Crow over to the middle of the mall near a big Fountain surrounded by palm trees, he tries to whip Crow into the fountain wall.....Reversed!!!! Crow slams Isaac into the wall!! Now Crow runs at Isaac, Back body drop by Ike, Crow is vaulted into the fountain
CRow hits the marble floor hard. Isaac climbs into the Fountain and starts beating on Crow, he picks Crow up.....tries a spinebuster.....Countered....backslide and a pin....1....2.....KICKOUT! Isaac kicks out but Crow grabs him.....CROWS REVENGE....thats all, now way Ike is getting up....1.....2....thr....now wait....KICKOUT THE REF SAYS...ISAAC KICKED OUT OF THE CROWS REVENGE.....Crow can't believe it, he just gets up and bows his head.....Crow is really frusterated. Isaac is slowely getting out of the blood red water. Isaac is behind Crow.....he just tapped Crow on the shoulder Crow spins around....JUVIDRIVER!!!! ON THE MARBLE GROUND OF THE FOUNTAIN!!!!......Crow is out and Isaac is climbing one of the palm trees near the Fountain......my god he's signalling to the croud....that thing must be 15 feet up......holy SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIT......SOUTHSIDE SPLASH!!!!
The count....1.....2.....3!!!!! MY GOD WE HAVE A NEW CHAMP...ISAAC WINS....ISAAC IS THE NEW CHAMP!!! WHAT A F**KING MATCH!!!!
SHCHEEVONE: There was Ike's world title win......Apparently we will be takin trips back in time all night to see the competitors in the Champion of Champions match and how they won their belts....that should be a great.
OVERVIEW: My favorite part is we get to see Wessin's old hair cuts.
RIGGS: I liked the hightop fade.......
wait, that was MC Hammer.
The scene cuts to the back and the crowd gives a pop, where we see Shawn Smith walking in the parkade. He has a small smile on his face and the sunglasses hides his eyes. He switches hands carrying the duffle bag.
SHCHEEVONE: There’s Mr. Sex, the man who will meet Manson Combs later on tonight in an extreme hell in a cell match. What a match that will be as Combs has his sights on destroying TTT once and for all. And Smith has a chance to prove him wrong.
Suddenly a loud screeching noise can be heard. Head lights from a fast approaching vehicle blind Shawn Smith as he tries to head for cover.
A black stretch limo suddenly hits Mr. Sex, sending him flying to the ground. The limo screeches to a stop, then reverses to pull up beside the limp body. The front door opens, and a tall, largely built man in a suit steps out. He looks familiar but know one seems to recognize him. He walks around to the passenger door and opens it. The crowd gives a disgusted pop as Manson Combs steps out from the limo. His long brown hair is tied back in a braid, with a gotee just in the works. He is wearing a white suit with a V neck shirt underneath. Manson kneels down and checks on Shawn Smith.
MANSON: Impressive. Ya know Joey, your civilian hitting skills keep getting better by the day. My mission objective is now complete.
Big Joe chuckles in satisfaction.
MANSON: He’s still alive, but barely. He’s as good as dead. Leave his sorry ass here for some fool to find.
Manson steps back in the limo, and slams the door while Joe steps back in the drivers seat. Just like that, the limo flees the scene.
SHCHEEVONE: That cheap bastard! Manson just hit Shawn Smith with the limo! It looks like there will be NO match.
WESSIN: Not unless Mr. Sex takes a miracle viagra pill.
The camera focuses on Shawn Smith’s form on the ground. He is bleeding from the head, and seems to have blood trickling from the mouth. A sudden shadow appears over him. A gloved hand rolls Smith on his back side. The camera shows the head, but no identity, as the figure is wearing a hooded sweater. Shawn barely opens his eyes as they widen.
MR. SEX: Where the hell were you....?
The unknown figure hushes him, and the scene cuts back to the announcers desk.
SHCHEEVONE: Who was that? And why the hell did Manson nail Smith? This is the last show from the UWF. Doesn’t he want to be a part of it?
WESSIN: Look, he probably has more important things to do. He’s a business man. They do attend to get busy once in a while.
RIGGS: Buisinessmen get busy? Man i gotta become a businessman.
OVERVIEW: Not that kind of busy dillweed.
SCHEEVONE: We’re back folks and up next we have a…err……unique match….Mimic the Dancing Clown against Mr. Duck in a….potato rules match!
WESSIN: I can’t believe you said that! I reckon we must be in the smoke till you choke match!
"Sweet Dreams" by Marilyn Manson plays as the crowd pops....Mimic and Pink the Bear walk out to a huge ovation....he bounces down to the ring , climbs up the steps and gets in the ring as he looks round the potato infested ringside.
OVERVIEW: It looks like Mimic has his eyes on all the potatoes and various gadgets around ringside!
Mr. Duck’s music is queued up and he walks out to a huge pop, as he comes down to the ring the camera zooms in on his hands where we see he has a potato strapped to each fist.....he grabs a mic as the crowd goes nuts
Potato Rules Match
MR DUCK: OH.... MY.... GOD!!! MIMIC, I AM, LIKE, YOUR BIGGEST FAN!! LIKE, FOR SURE!!!
MIMIC: ......... who in the puppy guts are you?
MR DUCK: I'M YOUR BIGGEST BIGGEST BIGGEST BIGGEST FAN, MAN!!! hey that rhymed!
MIMIC: Hehe yeah it did. Sweet.
MR DUCK: I MEAN, HOLY PENIS WRINKLE, I HAVE A SHRINE FOR YOU IN MY SHOWER!!! I LOVE YOU!!!
MIMIC: *sniffle, sniffle* I..... I.... I.... I LOVE YOU TOO MAN!!!!
Mr. Duck tosses down the mic and wraps his arms around Mimic
SCHEEVONE: What the hell? I knew these two were weird but.....? WAIT!! MR. DUCK WITH A BELLY TO BELLY!!!....now hes.... HE’S NAILING MIMIC WITH THOSE…ERR….POTATO SHOTS!
WESSIN: I’m going to need a long vacation after this card!
SCHEEVONE: Remember only potatoes and potato related items can be used as weapons in this match. Mr. Duck has Mimic on the floor with those Potato related right hands…good God did I just say that?!?! Mr. Duck rolls on top of Mimic and the ref makes the cover….1….2…..Mimic kicks out! Mr. Duck pulls the potatoes off his hands and goes to the outside…he has…a baking tray!
OVERVIEW: I guess that counts as a potato related item!
SCHEEVONE: Mr. Duck is in the ring and standing over Mimic, he brings the baking tray down….MIMIC KICKS IT AND IT GOES INTO THE FACE OF MR. DUCK! MR. DUCK IS STAGGERING AROUNFD THE RING TRYING TO FIND HIS BEARINGS! MIMIC HAS GRABBED A SACKOF POTATOES AND IS WIELDING IT AROUND HIS HEAD…HE CONNECTS ITH MR. DUCK AND MR. DUCK GOES FLYING OUTSIDE THE RING!
WESSIN: This is starting to freak me out!
SCHEEVONE: Duck is lying on the floor as Mimic walks over to him with the sack of potatoes in his hand…wait…what’s Duck got in his hand?
OVERVIEW: I think its one of those mandolin things.
WESSIN: A what?!?!
OVERVIEW: You know…those things that can cut potatoes at different thickness!
WESSIN: Oh…..I’ve got one of them…..I call it a maid!
SCHEEVONE: Mimic walks over to Duck…DUCK HITS MIMIC IN THE FACE WITH THE MANDOLIN! MIMIC IS BLEEDING S DUCK LOOKS TO GO ON THE OFFENSIVE, HE GRABS MIMIC AND DRAGS HIM OVER TO THE SPANISH ANNOUNCERS TABLE WHERE THERE’S A DEEP FAT FRYER!
OVERVIEW: He wouldn’t!
SCHEEVONE: Mr. Duck opens up the deep fat fryer and grabs hold of Mimic’s hand…DON’T DO IT DUCK! MIMIC WITH A THUMB TO THE EYE OF DUCK…THANK GOD! WAIT…MIMIC WITH DUCK’S HAND….INTO THE DEEP FAT FRYER! MY GOD I CAN’T BELIEVE WHAT I’M SEEING! DUCK HAS PULLED HIS HAND OUT AND IS RUNNING ROUND THE RING LIKE A SCALDED DOG!
WESSIN: Or a deep fried duck!
SCHEEVONE: Duck has found a pitcher of water and has plunged his red raw hand into it, that had to have hurt! Mimic is behind him with a potato masher…..CONNECTS WITH DUCK’S HEAD AND MIMIC MAKES THE COVER….1…..2….DUCK KICKS OUT! Mimic throws Mr. Duck back in the ring before grabbing a barrel of potatoes and brings them into the ring as well.
WESSIN: Someone win will they so we can stop this lunacy!
SCHEEVONE: Mimic walks over to Mr. Duck…..drop toe hold by Duck and Mimic’s head bounces off the bottom turnbuckle! Duck turns him round and runs off to get the barrel of potatoes, he picks one out…and throws it straight at Mimic’s head! And another, and another! Mr. Duck is pelting Mimic the Dancing Clown with potatoes! Duck walks over and drags Mimic out of the pile of potatoes and pins him….1……2……MIMIC KICKS OUT! Duck grabs the baking tray and puts in on the floor, now he grabs Mimic, scoop slam…float over by Mimic…DDT ON THE BAKING TRAY BY MIMIC AND THERE’S THE COVER…..1….2…..DUCKS ROLLS HIS SHOULDER AT THE LAST SECOND! MIMIC GRABS A POTATO AND GOES UP TOP…FIST DROP FROM THE TOP ROPE! HANG ON…I MEAN POTATO DROP FROM THE TOP ROPE! EITHER WAY MIMIC HAS THE COVER AGAIN……1……2…..DUCK BARELY MANAGES TO ROLL THE SHOULDER! Mimic can sense victory, he’s got hold of that baking tray and has gone back up top as Mr. Duck slowly gets up…Mimic leaps off…..
CLANG!!!!
SCHEEVONE: MIMIC CAME OFF THE TOP BUT DUCK HAD GRABBED A SHOVEL AND HAD CONNECTED WITH THE BAKING TRAY AND BOTH OBJECTS WENT INTO MIMIC’S FACE! HE’S OUT COLD AS DUCK IS TRYING TO RE-GROUP!
WESSIN: Wait a minute…a shovel isn’t a potato related item!
OVERVIEW: Maybe he would use it to dig them out of the ground!
WESSIN: Humph…….smart ass!
SCHEEVONE: Mimic is lying flat on his back in the middle of the ring…what’s Mr. Duck doing? He’s looking up and signaling to someone….. OH MY GOD I DON’T BELIEVE IT! MASHED POTATO IS DROPPING FROM A CHUTE ABOVE THE RING! ITS DROPPING ON TOP OF MIMIC WHO IS STILL OUT! MASHED POTATO IS CONTINUING TO FALL AND I CAN BARELY SEE MIMIC, IN FACT HE’S COMPLETELY COVERED! MR. DUCK CLIMBS ON TOP OF THE MASHED POTATO AS THE REF COUNTS…..1…......2……3!!!! MR. DUCK WINS A BIZARRE MATCH!
WESSIN: Thank God that’s over!
OVERVIEW: Someone better dig Mimic out of that mashed potato before he suffocates!
WESSIN: Hopefully this is the LAST we'll see of those two wackjobs.
RIGGS: mmmmm. potato. SCHEEVONE: What a match people....i have word we're about to take a look at Manson Comb's first ever World Title victory.....
WYNONA LEVELED THE REF BEFORE HE COULD CALL FOR THE BELL!!!!.....Wynona, that vixin.....she got Manson back.....Al pick Manson up......HELLRAISOR!!!! Thats it......its gotta be over.....BUT WAIT....there aint no ref......what the hell???......Wynona is calling for somebody.......
Whats that from under the ring......ITS KINDRED.....He's wearing a ref suit......he just rolled into the ring.........1..........2........3!!!! It may be over but.....but......Can Kindred ref this match.....what in the hell, he's calling for the bell.......?
KINDER: NOW MANSON....it is OFFICIAL OVER!
SHCHEEVONE: What the......Wait.....here comes IKE.....the PREZ and his two new recruits Extremeist and David......Ike has a mic with him.....
ISAAC: oh no, i'm so sorry Kindred, but it aint gonna happen like that......yo' ass aint a qualified referee.....you aint reffin this here match.....and since the real ref is out right now, then i guess what we about to do is perfectly legal!!!
SHCHEEVONE: WHAT THE??? Ike, Extremeist and David just lept into the ring....Extremeist nailed Kindred with a springboard dropkick.....Isaac hammered Jameson......Isaac picks Jameson up......DIRTY DRIVER!!!! IKE NAILED HIM WITH THE DIRTY DRIVER!!!!!.....David rolled Manson ontop......Extremeist is keeping Kindred at bay......David counts......1......2.....3!!!! ITS OVER.....DAVID COUNTED TO THREE......David reffed a match earlier....this one is official.....MANSON IS OUR NEW CHAMP!!!!....OH GOD NO.....WYNONA IS IN DISBELIEF......MANSON IS THE NEW WORLD FRIGGIN CHAMP.....
SHCHEEVONE: God that brings back memories....the creation of the Firm. Speeking of the Firm, what exactly was Ex's message to Ike at the top of the show all about?
OVERVIEW: Who knows, but Ike mensioned the Firm....could we see those Firm shirts pop up again.
WESSIN: i still have mine.
RIGGS: I got something thats firm.
SHCHEEVONE: you all suck....up next is....well.....just look over there.
the camera focuses on a scaffold wrapped in barbedwire
OVERVIEW: its time for blood.
SHCHEEVONE:This match promises to be a real doozy Ex, Fly-T, Cykill and Mikey Masters are taking part in a barbed wire time bomb scaffolding match!
WESSIN: A what?!?!
SCHEEVONE: Yup that’s right, the four men are on top of that scaffolding you see above the ring, ten feet above the ring. There is barbed wire up there and various weapons, there are time bombs attached to the four legs of the scaffolding and are timed to detonate after twenty minutes! The winner is the man who gets down off the scaffolding and into the ring first!
OVERVIEW: What if no-one gets down before twenty minutes is up?
WESSIN: Don’t tell me….they all come down together?!?!
RIGGS: They all go down on eachother?.....Man the UWF really HAS changed.
SCHEEVONE: Basically!
WESSIN: Cool!
SCHEEVONE: Okay, we have some camera’s placed up on the roof supports that are being moved by remote control and we’re getting a feed now.
JJ BUFFET (RING ANNOUNCER): Ladies and gentlemen, the twenty minutes will start….NOW!
Time Bomb, Barbed Wire Scaffolding match
WESSIN: He’s definatly building his part!
"Coma" by Guns and Roses blares as the crowd starts to boo....Mikey Masters walks out to a crowd that is still turned on him. The boo but he just fingers them and makes his way to the scaffold
SHCHEEVONE: Former Extreme Champ, Mikey Masters....the fans still hate this cocky bastard, i hope he gets killed!
"Crasy Train" by Ozzy blasts as the crowd gets up.....huge pyros go off, Cykill poses as he walks out and playes to a less than adoring crowd
RIGGS: ITS TRAINCYCLE!!! CAN I RIDE HIM!?
SHCHEEVONE: NO!
"Break Stuff" hits the PA as Ex walks out to a mixed reaction...the giant X appears on the runway....Ex plays to the crowd to a healthy reaction, pyros blaring....
WESSIN: SON!
OVERVIEW: Shouldn't he be called Extremeist and come out to that song by Puff Daddy?
suddenly the crowd errupts as "King of Hardcore" lights up on the screen....."Bawitaba" by Kid Rock hits the PA as Fly-T walks out to an eruupting crowd....chants of "Fly-T is God" go up.....Fly-T wastes no time rushing to the scaffold
SCHEEVONE: We’re off and running as all four men charge at each other, Mikey Masters and Cykill and swapping right hands while Ex and Fly-T are duking it out up there, thankfully the scaffolding is thick enough for two men to stand side by side comfortably.
OVERVIEW: But that also means they can be slammed and dropped on it too!
SCHEEVONE: Fair point Dave! Masters with a coop slam on Cykill…I heard that from down here! Fly-T has Ex….HEAD FIRST INTO THAT BARBED WIRE! EX IS THE FIRST MAN TO BLLED IN THE MATCH…BUT I BET HE WON’T BE THE LAST!
WESSIN: Does he win a bouquet for that?!?!
SCHEEVONE: Seeing his blood seems to have spurred Ex on, he kicks Fly-T in the ribs and rams his head into the scaffolding! Meanwhile Cykill has a trashcan lid….BENDS IT OVER MASTERS HEAD! MIKEY IS THE SECOND MAN TO BLEED AND WE HAVEN’T HAS FIVE MINUTES YET! SHOT AFTER SHOT BY THAT TRASHCAN LID RAINS DOWN ON MIKEY’S HEAD UNTIL HIS FACE IS A MASK OF CRIMSON!
WESSIN: Eeeeew, I’m trying to eat a corn dog here!
SCHEEVONE: Masters with a shoulder to Cykill’s gut….DDT ON THE METAL WALKWAY! MASTERWS IS KICKING THE CRAP OUT OF CYKILL WHO IS TRYING TO COVER UP! FLY-T BEHIND MASTERS…..BELLY TO BACK SUPLEX ON MASTERS…ONTO A TRASHCAN! MIKEY’ HOLDING HIS HEAD AS THE TRASHCAN CUMPLED UNDER THE FORCE!
OVERVIEW: While those three are slugging it out it looks like Ex is making his way down the ladder towards the ring, he’s gone down one level of scaffolding already!
SCHEEVONE: You’re right….Fly-T is the first to notice, he could be too late because Ex is really flying down that ladder…Fly-T on the edge of the scaffolding…HOLY SHIT! FLY-T WITH A SOMERSAULT SPLASH DOWN ONE LEVEL OF SCAFOLDING ONTO EX! BOTH MEN ARE LYING ON THE SCAFFLDING BENEATH MASTERS AND CYKILL! I CAN’T BELIEVE THOSE TWO AREN’T DEAD!
WESSIN: This is sick, twisted and barbaric…we should’ve had more of these matches in the UWF!
SCHEEVONE: Cykill and Masters are picking up the various weapons and barbed wire and throwing them down at the fallen bodies of Fly-T and Ex before they scale down themselves and start to beat on their bodies! Masters with a lead pipe……CRACKS EX’S KNEE WITH IT, HE MUST HAVE POPPED IT THERE! CYKILL HAS FLY-T…FLAPJACK ON THE BARBED WIRE! LISTEN TO FLY-T SCREAM IN AGONY!
OVERVIEW: When Fly-T screams you know it MUST hurt!
SCHEEVONE: Masters is banging Ex’s head off the ladder while Cykill has a chain wrapped round his fist and is busy working on Fly-T’s ribs! Ex just kicked Mikey in the face and is now climbing back up to the top of the scaffolding to escape! He better be quick because Mikey is after him! The pair are back up top with Masters chasing Ex with a steel chair! Cykill goes to whip Fly-T into the scaffolding…reversed…..CYKILL HITS HARD….SUPERKICK BY FLY-T AND CYKILL IS DOWN AND HURT BADLY! FLY-T PICKS UP A ROAD SIGN…..HE INTRODUCES IT TO CYKILL’S HEAD!
RING ANNOUNCER: There is ten minutes left…ten minutes left.
SCHEEVONE: Fly-T just heard that….SIT-DOWN POWERBOMB ON CYKILL RIGHT ON THE ROAD SIGN! FLY-T MAKING HIS WAY TO THE LADDER THAT LEADS TO THE RING, HE CLIMBS ON IT AND STARTS TO GO DOWN! CYKILL STAGGERS UP, HE’S GRABBED A FIRE EQSTINGUISHER…….HE UNLEASHES IT AT FLY-T WHO IS BLINDED BY THE FOAM! HE GRABS FLY-T AND DELIVERS A HIGH VERTICAL SUPLEX!
OVERVIEW: Have you seen what Ex is doing to Mikey?!?!
SCHEEVONE: Oh God no! Ex has placed Mikey’s foot inside that steel chair and now Ex is on top of a ladder with another steel chair in his hand, if he let’s fly he could break Mikey’s ankle! EX JUMPS OFF…….CONNECTS WITH THE CHAIR! LOOK AT MASTERS, HE’S SQUIRMING AND SCREAMING WHILE HOLDING HIS ANKLE!
OVERVIEW: I don’t think its broken but it looks in a bad way.
WESSIN: It will be broken if ex continues to lay into it with that steel chair!
SCHEEVONE: Ex is repeatedly hitting the ankle of Masters with that chair! Cykill and Fly-T are climbing back up the ladder to the top level….AND THEY GET MET FOR THEIR TROUBLES WITH A CHAIR SHOT FROM EX! CYKILL GOES DOWN! EX SWINGS AGAIN….CONNECTS WITH FLY-T! ALL THE MEN ARE DOWN EXCEPT EX WHO HAS SEEN HIS OPPORTUNTIY AGAIN AND IS STARTING TO CLIMB DOWN THE LADDER AGAIN!
OVERVIEW: Ex should have a good chance here, all the others are out cold!
RING ANNOUNCER: There are five minutes left….five minutes.
SCHEEVONE: Ex seems buoyed by that call from the ring announcer, he’s climbing down the ladder a lot quicker, he’s almost at the lower level of scaffolding.
OVERVIEW: It looks like Mikey Masters has recovered the quickest.
SCHEEVONE: Mikey is up and is staggering around wildly, he looks down through the ladder’s gap and sees where ex is….HE’S JUMPED OFF THE SCAFFOLDING! HEART STOPPER! A HEART STOPPER FROM ONE LEVEL OF SCAFFOLDINGTO ANOTHER! EX’S HEAD BOUNCED OFF THE STEEL AND THERE IS BLOOD EVERYWHERE! MIKEYIS HOLDING HIS LEG WHILE EX LIES THERE UNCONSCIOUS!
WESSIN: Fly-T and Cykill are getting up too, I figured there wouldn’t be that much of a lull in the proceedings!
SCHEEVONE: Fly-T picks up a baseball bat that is wrapped in barbed wire….HE JAMS IT IN CYKILL’S RIBS! THE MARKS FROM THE BARBED WIRE ARE THERE TO SEE!
RING ANNOUNCER: There are only two minutes left….two minutes.
SCHEEVONE: FLY-T SWINGS THE BAT….STRAIGHT TO CYKILL’S HEAD! HE DROPS LIKE A STONE WITH THE BAT STUCK TO HIS HEAD THANKS TO THE BARBED WIRE!
OVERVIEW: Urgh…that’s disgusting!
SCHEEVONE: This certainly isn’t for the faint hearted! Fly-T senses the opportunity and is climbing down the ladder towards the lower level of scaffolding.
RING ANNOUNCER: There is one minute left…ONE MINUTE!
SCHEEVONE: Fly-T is at the bottom of the scaffolding, his injuries from this match are slowing him down as he staggers over to the ladder which leads to the ring and ultimately to victory!
OVERVIEW: Masters is getting up, he sees where Fly-T is going!
SCHEEVONE: Masters is hobbling over to Fly-T who hasn’t seen Masters yet!
RING ANNOUNCER: TEN SECONDS LEFT…TEN SECONDS LEFT!
SCHEEVONE: Fly-T is on the top of the ladder and is climbing down….
CROWD: …10.…9….8….
SCHEEVONE: …FLY-T IS AT DROPPING DISTANCE TO THE RING!
CROWD: 7….6…..5….4….
SCHEEVONE: MASTERS HAS FLY-T BY THE HEAD, FLY-T IS DANGLING IN MID-AIR BY HIS NECK AND MIKEY MASTERS ISN’T LETTING GO!
CROWD: 3…..2…..1…..
KA-BOOM!!!!
KA-BOOM!!!!
KA-BOOM!!!!
KA-BOOM!!!!
SCHEEVONE: OH SWEET MOTHER OF GOD! BECAUSE FLY-T DIDN’T MAKE IT AND THE TWENTY MINUTES ARE UP THE DETONATIONS WENT OFF! THE SCAFFOLDING AND EVERYONE AND THING ONIT HAS TUMBLED TEN FEET TO THE RING BELOW! THER ARE BODY PARTS STICKING OUT OF THERUBLLE AND THEY LOOK IN A BAD WAY, WE NEED THE EMT’S DOWN HERE NOW!
OVERVIEW: THAT WAS INCREDIBLE, I’VE NEVER SEEN ANYTHINGLIKE THAT BEFORE!
WESSIN: That was great, bloodshed and plenty of it!
SCHEEVONE: the medical unit and the security guys are out here and are trying to help the four men who are crushed in the middle of the ring…this may not be pleasant viewing so we’ll take a quick break here and hopefully we’ll be in good enough shape to continue!
Cut to commercials.
up next is what promises to be a real doozy of a match, Ex, Fly-T, Cykill and Mikey Masters are taking part in a barbed wire time bomb scaffolding match!
WESSIN: A what?!?!
SCHEEVONE: Yup that’s right, the four men are on top of that scaffolding you see above the ring, ten feet above the ring. There is barbed wire up there and various weapons, there are time bombs attached to the four legs of the scaffolding and are timed to detonate after twenty minutes! The winner is the man who gets down off the scaffolding and into the ring first!
OVERVIEW: What if no-one gets down before twenty minutes is up?
WESSIN: Don’t tell me….they all come down together?!?!
SCHEEVONE: Basically!
WESSIN: Cool!
SCHEEVONE: Okay, we have some camera’s placed up on the roof supports that are being moved by remote control and we’re getting a feed now.
RING ANNOUNCER: Ladies and gentlemen, the twenty minutes will start….NOW!
WESSIN: He’s definatly building his part!
SCHEEVONE: We’re off and running as all four men charge at each other, Mikey Masters and Cykill and swapping right hands while Ex and Fly-T are duking it out up there, thankfully the scaffolding is thick enough for two men to stand side by side comfortably.
OVERVIEW: But that also means they can be slammed and dropped on it too!
SCHEEVONE: Fair point Dave! Masters with a coop slam on Cykill…I heard that from down here! Fly-T has Ex….HEAD FIRST INTO THAT BARBED WIRE! EX IS THE FIRST MAN TO BLLED IN THE MATCH…BUT I BET HE WON’T BE THE LAST!
WESSIN: Does he win a bouquet for that?!?!
SCHEEVONE: Seeing his blood seems to have spurred Ex on, he kicks Fly-T in the ribs and rams his head into the scaffolding! Meanwhile Cykill has a trashcan lid….BENDS IT OVER MASTERS HEAD! MIKEY IS THE SECOND MAN TO BLEED AND WE HAVEN’T HAS FIVE MINUTES YET! SHOT AFTER SHOT BY THAT TRASHCAN LID RAINS DOWN ON MIKEY’S HEAD UNTIL HIS FACE IS A MASK OF CRIMSON!
WESSIN: Eeeeew, I’m trying to eat a corn dog here!
SCHEEVONE: Masters with a shoulder to Cykill’s gut….DDT ON THE METAL WALKWAY! MASTERWS IS KICKING THE CRAP OUT OF CYKILL WHO IS TRYING TO COVER UP! FLY-T BEHIND MASTERS…..BELLY TO BACK SUPLEX ON MASTERS…ONTO A TRASHCAN! MIKEY’ HOLDING HIS HEAD AS THE TRASHCAN CUMPLED UNDER THE FORCE!
OVERVIEW: While those three are slugging it out it looks like Ex is making his way down the ladder towards the ring, he’s gone down one level of scaffolding already!
SCHEEVONE: You’re right….Fly-T is the first to notice, he could be too late because Ex is really flying down that ladder…Fly-T on the edge of the scaffolding…HOLY SHIT! FLY-T WITH A SOMERSAULT SPLASH DOWN ONE LEVEL OF SCAFOLDING ONTO EX! BOTH MEN ARE LYING ON THE SCAFFLDING BENEATH MASTERS AND CYKILL! I CAN’T BELIEVE THOSE TWO AREN’T DEAD!
WESSIN: This is sick, twisted and barbaric…we should’ve had more of these matches in the UWF!
SCHEEVONE: Cykill and Masters are picking up the various weapons and barbed wire and throwing them down at the fallen bodies of Fly-T and Ex before they scale down themselves and start to beat on their bodies! Masters with a lead pipe……CRACKS EX’S KNEE WITH IT, HE MUST HAVE POPPED IT THERE! CYKILL HAS FLY-T…FLAPJACK ON THE BARBED WIRE! LISTEN TO FLY-T SCREAM IN AGONY!
OVERVIEW: When Fly-T screams you know it MUST hurt!
SCHEEVONE: Masters is banging Ex’s head off the ladder while Cykill has a chain wrapped round his fist and is busy working on Fly-T’s ribs! Ex just kicked Mikey in the face and is now climbing back up to the top of the scaffolding to escape! He better be quick because Mikey is after him! The pair are back up top with Masters chasing Ex with a steel chair! Cykill goes to whip Fly-T into the scaffolding…reversed…..CYKILL HITS HARD….SUPERKICK BY FLY-T AND CYKILL IS DOWN AND HURT BADLY! FLY-T PICKS UP A ROAD SIGN…..HE INTRODUCES IT TO CYKILL’S HEAD!
RING ANNOUNCER: There is ten minutes left…ten minutes left.
SCHEEVONE: Fly-T just heard that….SIT-DOWN POWERBOMB ON CYKILL RIGHT ON THE ROAD SIGN! FLY-T MAKING HIS WAY TO THE LADDER THAT LEADS TO THE RING, HE CLIMBS ON IT AND STARTS TO GO DOWN! CYKILL STAGGERS UP, HE’S GRABBED A FIRE EQSTINGUISHER…….HE UNLEASHES IT AT FLY-T WHO IS BLINDED BY THE FOAM! HE GRABS FLY-T AND DELIVERS A HIGH VERTICAL SUPLEX!
OVERVIEW: Have you seen what Ex is doing to Mikey?!?!
SCHEEVONE: Oh God no! Ex has placed Mikey’s foot inside that steel chair and now Ex is on top of a ladder with another steel chair in his hand, if he let’s fly he could break Mikey’s ankle! EX JUMPS OFF…….CONNECTS WITH THE CHAIR! LOOK AT MASTERS, HE’S SQUIRMING AND SCREAMING WHILE HOLDING HIS ANKLE!
OVERVIEW: I don’t think its broken but it looks in a bad way.
WESSIN: It will be broken if ex continues to lay into it with that steel chair!
SCHEEVONE: Ex is repeatedly hitting the ankle of Masters with that chair! Cykill and Fly-T are climbing back up the ladder to the top level….AND THEY GET MET FOR THEIR TROUBLES WITH A CHAIR SHOT FROM EX! CYKILL GOES DOWN! EX SWINGS AGAIN….CONNECTS WITH FLY-T! ALL THE MEN ARE DOWN EXCEPT EX WHO HAS SEEN HIS OPPORTUNTIY AGAIN AND IS STARTING TO CLIMB DOWN THE LADDER AGAIN!
OVERVIEW: Ex should have a good chance here, all the others are out cold!
RING ANNOUNCER: There are five minutes left….five minutes.
SCHEEVONE: Ex seems buoyed by that call from the ring announcer, he’s climbing down the ladder a lot quicker, he’s almost at the lower level of scaffolding.
OVERVIEW: It looks like Mikey Masters has recovered the quickest.
SCHEEVONE: Mikey is up and is staggering around wildly, he looks down through the ladder’s gap and sees where ex is….HE’S JUMPED OFF THE SCAFFOLDING! HEART STOPPER! A HEART STOPPER FROM ONE LEVEL OF SCAFFOLDINGTO ANOTHER! EX’S HEAD BOUNCED OFF THE STEEL AND THERE IS BLOOD EVERYWHERE! MIKEYIS HOLDING HIS LEG WHILE EX LIES THERE UNCONSCIOUS!
WESSIN: Fly-T and Cykill are getting up too, I figured there wouldn’t be that much of a lull in the proceedings!
SCHEEVONE: Fly-T picks up a baseball bat that is wrapped in barbed wire….HE JAMS IT IN CYKILL’S RIBS! THE MARKS FROM THE BARBED WIRE ARE THERE TO SEE!
RING ANNOUNCER: There are only two minutes left….two minutes.
SCHEEVONE: FLY-T SWINGS THE BAT….STRAIGHT TO CYKILL’S HEAD! HE DROPS LIKE A STONE WITH THE BAT STUCK TO HIS HEAD THANKS TO THE BARBED WIRE!
OVERVIEW: Urgh…that’s disgusting!
SCHEEVONE: This certainly isn’t for the faint hearted! Fly-T senses the opportunity and is climbing down the ladder towards the lower level of scaffolding.
RING ANNOUNCER: There is one minute left…ONE MINUTE!
SCHEEVONE: Fly-T is at the bottom of the scaffolding, his injuries from this match are slowing him down as he staggers over to the ladder which leads to the ring and ultimately to victory!
OVERVIEW: Masters is getting up, he sees where Fly-T is going!
SCHEEVONE: Masters is hobbling over to Fly-T who hasn’t seen Masters yet!
RING ANNOUNCER: TEN SECONDS LEFT…TEN SECONDS LEFT!
SCHEEVONE: Fly-T is on the top of the ladder and is climbing down….
CROWD: …10.…9….8….
SCHEEVONE: …FLY-T IS AT DROPPING DISTANCE TO THE RING!
CROWD: 7….6…..5….4….
SCHEEVONE: MASTERS HAS FLY-T BY THE HEAD, FLY-T IS DANGLING IN MID-AIR BY HIS NECK AND MIKEY MASTERS ISN’T LETTING GO!
CROWD: 3…..2…..1…..
KA-BOOM!!!!
KA-BOOM!!!!
KA-BOOM!!!!
KA-BOOM!!!!
SCHEEVONE: OH SWEET MOTHER OF GOD! BECAUSE FLY-T DIDN’T MAKE IT AND THE TWENTY MINUTES ARE UP THE DETONATIONS WENT OFF! THE SCAFFOLDING AND EVERYONE AND THING ONIT HAS TUMBLED TEN FEET TO THE RING BELOW! THER ARE BODY PARTS STICKING OUT OF THERUBLLE AND THEY LOOK IN A BAD WAY, WE NEED THE EMT’S DOWN HERE NOW!
OVERVIEW: THAT WAS INCREDIBLE, I’VE NEVER SEEN ANYTHINGLIKE THAT BEFORE!
WESSIN: That was great, bloodshed and plenty of it!
SCHEEVONE: the medical unit and the security guys are out here and are trying to help the four men who are crushed in the middle of the ring…this may not be pleasant viewing so we’ll take a quick break here and hopefully we’ll be in good enough shape to continue!
(Without warning, "N 2 Gether Now" by Limp Bizkit and Method Man blasts from the speakers as "Crazy Rage" Johnny Blaze makes his way to the ring to a massive crowd pop....He grins like a goofball and slides into the ring, holding a microphone.)
SHCHEEVONE: Its Johnny Blaze....earlier he won the Tag team of the Century match, later he's in a smoke til you choke match......
OVERVIEW: Oh God.....(laughs)....would somebody call security?!
WESSIN: Why?! BLAZE RULES!!!
OVERVIEW: Actually, he doesn't. He smoked himself retarded with that weed.....
WESSIN: THAT'S WHY HE RULES!! BA-HOO!!
SHCHEEVONE: It's "BOO-YA" you imbecile!!
(Blaze lifts the mic to his lips.)
BLAZE: Heeeellooooooo CALGARY .......................................................ALBERTA CANADA!!
(Crowd laughs and boos Blaze lightheartedly.)
SHCHEEVONE: For God's sakes, it is the last UWF card in history THE LEAST YOU COULD DO IS GET THE TOWN RIGHT AT LEAST ONCE!! IT'S MADISON SQUARE GARDEN IN NEW YORK DAMNIT!! GOD!! (laughs)
BLAZE: Now, I feel like I've been pigeonholed as a "pothead" in the UWF. That is sooooo unfair!! I am NOT a pothead!! I don't do drugs...I just DO WEED!! Just because my favorite movie is "HALF BAKED", my favorite song is "LAST DANCE WITH MARY JANE" by Tom Petty, and my favorite animal is the ROACH does NOT MEAN I'M A POTHEAD!!!
(Crowd laughs at Blaze.)
BLAZE: I mean----um....what was I talking about again?!
(Crowd boos him lightheartedly.)
SHCHEEVONE: Marijuana affects the memory..that's my pubic service message for the night.
BLAZE: Ohhhh yeah...do y'all remember my commercials for QUAKER OATMEAL?!
(Crowd pops.)
BLAZE: Well, I'm about to do another one...A LIVE COMMERCIAL! With the special help of a new friend of mine.......you might know him from the UNSPOKEN WORD.....CHAAAAAAD SHAAAADOW!!
(The crowd roars as the camera on the UWFTrom cuts backstage to where the UWF's former #1 columnist is talking to, of all, people...VINCE MCMAHON!! The crowd roars as the audio is finally picking up....Chad Shadow and Vince McMahon are talking outside the arena in the cold night.)
WESSIN: Hey, its Vinny Mac!! Just goes to show ya, ANYTHING can happen in the UWF!
SHADOW: Let me get this straight Vince...you're going to offer me a contract RIGHT NOW?!
VINCE MCMAHON: I'm a genetic jackhammer. Huh? Oh yes, I am Chad. I think you would make an excellent manager for a team in the World Wrestling Federation. You obviously do not have the physical ability to wrestle anymore due to your injury, but I think you could make a great manager in the WWF. Just sign right here if you please....
SHADOW: Alright!! Finally!! MY DREAM HAS COME TRUE!
SHCHEEVONE: I don't believe this...Chad Shadow is signing a WWF contract during a UWF ppv?!?! What in the world?!
VINCE MCMAHON: Um, maybe you should read it over, Chad...
SHADOW: Too late!! I signed!! I'm in the WWF!! Yes!!
VINCE MCMAHON: Ok then...(folding up the signed contract.)...well, if you'll just come with me and we can meet with my good friend HHH and work out an angle...
SHADOW: I'd love to...but I have some UNFISHED BUSINESS I have to attend to.....
(The Jumbotron shuts off as the crowd is abuzz.)
SHCHEEVONE: Well, it appears Chad Shadow, writer of the Unspoken Word, has signed a contract to that second rate federation the WWF......I wonder why he would team up with Johnny Blaze of all people for a..what is it Blaze said? A Quaker Oatmeal live commercial? Something is fishy...
OVERVIEW: Yeah...you do remember that Chad Shadow was on the brink of stardom back in the days before the UWF was the IEW, and it was an indy fed. Shadow was sidelined with an injury and kept to the curb ever since..only to arise as a half assed booker and scout until his UNSPOKEN WORD column took off...the man looked pretty bitter last week on TV....seems he's been pretty depressed since he retired from being a columnist to fight over custody for his kid in court...
BLAZE: Uh....what the HELL is going on here?!?!?!?! Are we going to shoot this commercial or not?! I have places to go, people to see.....well, actually I DON'T. I'm going to sit in a Dumpster and smoke a J after this wrestling thingy. (Crowd pops.)
(Suddenly, "Ball Tongue" by KoRn hits the speakers as the crowd erupts in a mixed, but mostly heel pop, and Chad Shadow emerges from the entrance ramp with a shotgun. He races down into the ring as the crowd screams....everybody is in a state of shock except Johnny Blaze.)
OVERVIEW: OH MY GOD CHAD SHADOW HAS SNAPPED...HE'S GOT A LOADED SHOTGUN IN THE RING!! SOMEBODY COULD GET SERIOUSLY HURT! I DON'T BELIEVE THIS! I'M DUCKING UNDER MY DESK!! LISTEN TO THESE PEOPLE SCREAM!!
WESSIN: MOOOOOOOMMY!!
SHADOW: ALRIGHT!! NOBODY MOVE, AND YOU'LL ALL BE JUST FINE!! I'M GOING TO MAKE THIS QUICK!!
BLAZE: Haha man this commercial is the BOMB...
SHADOW: "Commercial?!" This is no commercial! THIS IS ME GETTING MY PERSONAL REVENGE ON THE UWF!! (Shadow put the shotgun to Blaze's temple.)
BLAZE: Ouch, dude, that hurts....haha thats filled with QUAKER OATMEAL, right?
SHADOW: NO!! IT IS "FILLED" WITH BULLETS!!
BLAZE: Ok so its filled with WEED then? I'm gonna get high...how high....so high that I can touch the sky---
SHADOW: NO YOU IMBECILE!! NOW IKE LISTEN TO ME AND YOU LISTEN GOOD!! I WANT THAT UWF WORLD TITLE HANDED TO ME AND PUT IN MY NAME!! I WANT TO BE THE LAST UWF WORLD CHAMPION!! YOU SCREWED ME! YOU NEVER GAVE ME A CHANCE IN THE IEW!! YOU NEVER GAVE ME A CHANCE IN THE UWF!! I WAS A COLUMNIST, SURE, BUT YOU NEVER PAID ME ANY MONEY FOR MY INJURY!! NOTHING AT ALL!! NOW, I SIT AT HOME WITH MY FAMILY....AND DO YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENED TO CONTINUE MY ROTTEN LUCK!! I CATCH MY WIFE CHEATING IN BED WITH ANOTHER MAN, NOT EVEN A MAN!! A GOOK!! AND IN A FIT OF RAGE I ACCIDENTLY HIT MY KID WITH A REMOTE CONTROL!! NOW I CAN'T SEE MY WIFE OR MY KID! AND IT ALL STEMS BACK TO YOU!! MY LIFE IS HELL AND I DON'T CARE ANYMORE!! I WANT YOU TO COME OUT HERE WITH THAT UWF WORLD TITLE OR MR. JOHNNY BLAZE HERE GETS SHOT IN HIS FREAKING HEAD!!
BLAZE: Haha dude you are tripping....
SHADOW: DID YOU EVEN HEAR WHAT I SAID!!! I'M GOING TO KILL YOU! WERE YOU PAYING ATTENTION?
BLAZE: No. Well, I think you said something about how rhinos in India have one horn, and African rhinos have two horns. Or maybe its the other way around...
SHADOW: (long pause of utter disbelief.)I DID NOT!! ARE YOU RETARDED!! I AM GOING TO KILL YOU UNLESS IKE GIVES ME THE UWF WORLD TITLE!! NO DO YOU HAVE ANY LAST WORDS!!
BLAZE: Actually, I do. BOO-YA!!
(Chad Shadow cocks the shotgun.)
BLAZE: GEEZUS!! DID YOU HEAR THAT!!
SHADOW: Of course I did, I cocked the shot--
BLAZE: YOU FARTED!!
SHADOW: WHAT?!?!?!
BLAZE: SHA-DOW FARTED!! SHA-DOW FARTED!!
SHADOW: STOP SAYING THAT!!
CROWD: SHA-DOW FARTED! SHA-DOW FARTED!!
SHADOW: SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP!! DAMNIT!! IKE! THIS IS YOUR LAST CHANCE TO COME OUT AND GIVE ME THE UWF WORLD TITLE OR BLAZE HERE GETS SMOKED!!
BLAZE: Yes!! I TOLD y'all I was going to smoke!!
OVERVIEW: Folks, this is a serious situation.....I hope to God IKE comes out and complys with Shadow's wishes...we don't want Blaze to die---well, let me rethink this....
SHCHEEVONE: HE IS A HUMAN BEING DAVE!!
(Suddenly, Vince McMahon appears on the UWFTron.)
VINCE MCMAHON: Chad Shadow, you BLITHERING IDIOT!! I TOLD you to read that CONTRACT!!
SHADOW: Wha....? (pulls shotgun down and walks to the ropes to face the Tron better.) What do you mean?!
VINCE MCMAHON: That contract said you can't show up on any other federation's TV!! It says if you do, you cannot participate in the WWF and your contract is declared NULL AND VOID!! AND YOU JUST DID!! Your contract is TERMINATED!!
SHADOW: NOOoooOOOO!! Can't I have one more chance?!?!?
VINCE MCMAHON: NO CHANCE..... IN HELL!!! GENETIC JACKHAMMER!!
(Vince's face dissapears from the UWFTron as the crowd pops.)
SHCHEEVONE: Wow!! SHADOW GETS SCREWED AGAIN!! Chad finally got a break, and he ruined it by following through with this little revenge scheme! He looks livid!! He is AIMING THE SHOTGUN AT BLAZE NOW!! MY GOD, HE'S GOING TO SHOOT JOHNNY.....WAIT A DAMN SECOND!! WHAT'S THAT---NO WHO'S THAT FALLING FROM THE RAFTERS AT THE CEILING!! MY GOD A BODY IS FALLING FROM THE CEILING RAFTERS INTO THE RING!! HE'S FALLING RIGHT ON SHADOW....
PLOP!!
SHCHEEVONE: IT'S JACK MARLEY!! JACK MARLEY JUST DROPPED FROM THE CEILING OF THE ARENA DIRECTLY ON TOP OF CHAD SHADOW KNOCKING HIM UNCONCIOUS!! AND JACK IS BACK ON HIS FEET!! THIS IS INCREDIBLE!!! IT'S A BLAZE AND JACK REUNION!! THE POTHEADS ARE BACK!! THE POTHEADS ARE BACK!! LOOK AT THEM HIGHFIVE AND HUG!! LISTEN TO THIS CROWD ROAR!! THIS IS SIMPLY UNPRECEDENTED!! BLAZE IS HANDING JACK THE MIC....
JACK: Dizam its great to be back with the Blazing One!
BLAZE: YEAH!! I MISSED YA OL BUDDY OL PAL!! NICE OF YOU TO DROP BY!!
JACK: I had to save ya mon.
BLAZE: Because we were best buds?
JACK: No, because you OWE ME BUD! HAHAHAHA
BLAZE: Damn!! JACK YOU KNOW WHAT ITS TIME FOR?!?!?
JACK: It's time to get high ONE MORE TIME!!!
(Jack and Blaze pull out two garbage bags full of joints.)
BLAZE: Now after that seriously f*cked up incident, THIS WEED IS WHAT WE ALLLLLL NEED!! AM I RIGHT?!?!
SHCHEEVONE: FOR ONCE IN HIS LIFE I THINK HE IS!! WHAT DO YOU THINK DAVE?
OVERVIEW: You know, why the HELL NOT?!?! THIS IS THE LAST UWF PPV!! I'LL DO IT!! WHAT ABOUT YOU, JASON?
WESSIN: DOES A BEAR SHIT IN THE WOODS AND WIPE HIS ASS WITH A RABBIT?!?!? HELL YES!!
(The crowd roars as Johnny Blaze and Jack dispense all the joints in the two garbage bags to the crowd and the 3 announcers.) JACK: Time to smoke some Jizoints mon. Time for the weedarific ride!
BLAZE: It's a roller coaster baby but it just GOES UP!! BOO-YA!!
JACK: And everyone knows what goes good with Weed....TACO BELL!
SHCHEEVONE: Oh, does this mean......
(Jack pulls out a bag full of Taco Bell and throws them at the crowd.)
BLAZE: AND DON'T FORGET THE QUAKER OATMEAL!! IT WILL MAKE YOU LEFT TESTICLE BIGGER!!
WESSIN: IT WILL?!?! GIVE ME A LOT!!!
(Blaze pulls out a bag full of Quaker Oatmeal and throws it at the crowd.)
JACK: Yo nessicito el Burritio... too bad Rico isnt here I stol his last Taco he is going to starve (Laughs)
BLAZE: ISN'T HE GAY?!?!
JACK: I plead the 10th...WAIT NO I PLEAD 420 MON! (Crowd laughs)
BLAZE: Now I just want somebody, anybody, to LIGHT THIS SHIT UP!!
(Crowd pops.)
BLAZE: SMOKE THIS FOR RAZOR SHARPE!!
JACK: Smoke it for Gunn..wait nah smoke it for the big bubbas humping Gunn!
BLAZE: FOR EX'S TATTOED ASS!!
JACK:For Jameson RIP!
BLAZE:FOR CYKILL IN HOPE HE DIES!! JACK:For JD and Breaker!
BLAZE: FOR ALL THE STUDENTS WHO HAVE F*CKED THEIR TEACHERS, AND FOR VIAGRA!! FOR OWEN HART!! FOR DROZ!! AND FOR TINFOIL AND POP BOTTLES!! FOR JACK JERKEL AND JERK JACKAL!! AND FOR CASE AND HIS MILLIONS AND MILLIONS OF POKEMON CARDS!! AND FOR WU-TANG!!
JACK: For Rico who is plotting now!
BLAZE: FOR GUYS WITH BREAST CANCER!!
JACK: For Chad Sha--no wait....d'oh!! FOR BOB MARLEY AND JERRY GARCIA, DUDE MON! AND FOR WOMEN WITH TESTICULAR CANCER!!
BLAZE: FOR MANSON COMBS!! ...WHOEVER HE IS!!
JACK: FOR ELLIS JACKSON, BUT NOT FOR DAMON ZOMBIE!!
BLAZE: And for STALLION, but NOT for MIKEY MASTERS!!
JACK: or Raymond MIA Faith
BLAZE: AND FINALLY!! FOR ALL OF YOU.......
JACK AND BLAZE:....AND THE UWF!!!!
BLAZE: BOO-YA!!
JACK: DIZAM BANGIN!!
(The two light their J's and run out into the crowd screaming and laughing.)
OVERVIEW: DAMN!! WHAT A GREAT MOMENT!! A TRAGEDY WAS AVERTED AND TURNED INTO A PARTY!! I think I'm floating!!
SHCHEEVONE: As am I Dave, but what about Chad Shadow?! He's STILL lying unconcious in the ring!!
WESSIN: Dude...I'm the ripped...I'm the rippedest I've ever been...I can't drive man....this weed is good....
(Suddenly, the WCW Nitro theme hits and Vince Russo runs out to a lot of boos from the crowd.)
SHCHEEVONE: What the hell is RUSSO doing here?!?!
(Without a word, Russo picks up Chad Shadow and carries him to the back.)
SHCHEEVONE: Am I high or did that really happen?!?! It looks to me like RUSSO has come back for SHADOW and is carrying him to the back...looks like CHAD SHADOW will end up in WCW!!
OVERVIEW: I didn't see Russo taking any interest until McMahon tried to sign him....
SHCHEEVONE: That's how Russo works, Dave!! WHAT A NIGHT WE SAW CHAD SHADOW SNAP AND TRY TO KILL JOHNNY BLAZE AND IT LED TO A BLAZE/JACK REUNION THAT ENDED WITH US ALL GETTING JOINTS!! I LOVE IT!!
OVERVIEW: And when we come back....SMOKE TIL YOU CHOKE!!! Jack and Blaze are ready to blaze it up with Rico and Fly-T.....who will come away the smokinest man in the UWF?
SHCHEEVONE: SRPING BOARD INTO A CLOSTHESLINE!!! What a move! Razor expecting Aero to go for the count, but he doesn’t! He’s signalling for the “Death From Above”! WAIT! What’s going on here?!?! It’s that mysterious stranger we saw a couple weeks ago! But what does he want?!?!
WESSIN: Oh god, he’s HUGE!
OVERVIEW: My god, your right! What’s his name? Avenger? From what we know, Aero and him had some sorta confrontation years back. But that was a long time ago? What does he want now?!?!
(Aero runs off one set of ropes, jumps to the top rope on the opposite end and nails the Death From Above-)
SHCHEEVONE: HE’S GOT IT! HE’S GOT IT! Here comes this Avenger person, he’s standing outside the ring, Aero forget’s to go for the cover, he’s locked eyes with this man! Just what the hell is this guy playing at?!?! Aero won’t go for the pin, something’s wrong here! I’ve never seen him like this!
OVERVIEW: Well he better turn around now!
Some fans screem as Stallion get’s to his feet-
SHCHEEVONE: Turn around you fool! Stallion taps Aero on the shoulder, he spins around realizing his mistake-
WESSIN: Lights out-
SHCHEEVONE: THUNDERING HOOVES! THUNDERING HOOVES!!! Aero’s out cold, the pin.........
...................1
............................2
.......................................3!!!!
SHCHEEVONE: IT’S OVER!! Aero’s out like a light! Stallion’s the new World Champion!
SHCHEEVONE: Stal went on to win the title one other time and is without a doubt one of the greatest ever.....but later tonight he'll be in tough against Ike in a lions den match....this should be crasy.
Smoke Til you Choke match
SHCHEEVONE: Jack and Blaze are in the middle of the ring 'gettin primed'.....
Rico walks as the crowd goes nuts....he's wearing an old Hemp for Victory t-shirt and carries a 'cronic' flag.....he takes his seet by Blaze and Jack
SHCHEEVONE: i wonder if Fly-T will be up to comin out here right -
"Bawitaba" by Kid Rock slams against the PA as Fly-T limps out, joint behind his ear, in adiddas track pants and a wife beater....he's beaten up and gets a nice pop from the crowd as he takes his seat
JJ BUFFET: AND NOW...the SPECIAL GUEST REFEREE.....CHEEEEECH MARIN!!!
"Born in East LA" blares as Cheech walks out in a ref outfit....the crowd goes wild. Jack and Rico are bowing down as he takes the mic
CHEECH: HELLLLO ESSSSSSSSSAYS! Tonight the Smoke til you choke match will run under EAST LA RULES MAYNE!
SHCHEEVONE: What does that meen?
CHEECH: that meens that there is a bag of doritos behind each of you....but you only can eat it if you bow out of the match!
the crowd pops
CHEECH: oh yeah, and you'll be tokin....FROM THIS!
suddenly Chong wheels out a bong made out of a welded oil drum.....the eyes light up. as it is led to the ring
CHEECH: NOW GET TOKIN!
SHCHEEVONE: Here goes....first is Rico.....OUCH!
RICO:Dizzam, That tastes like shit mayn......what is it?
SHCHEEVONE: Rico is weezing......here goes Jack......he takes a hit.
JACK: GROSS! That shit tastes worse than Rico's sister.
SHCHEEVONE: Something seems to be wrong with the weed.....wait, Fly is tryin it....MAN HE JUST DREW BACK ON THE SMELL ALONE!?
FLY-T: Dude, that smells like my nuts after a round with Wessins wife.
SHCHEEVONE: man, must smell bad.
WESSIN: if it smells like she does the answer is YES.
CHEECH: C'mon Johnny, don't be a pussy like these boys.
SHCHEEVONE: Blaze is gonna try it.....isn't that his stuff packed in there?
OVERVIEW: Should be?
BLAZE: THIS AINT MY STASH!?....WHAT THE HELL!!?
SHCHEEVONE: CHEECH IS BOLTING FOR THE RUNWAY!? WHAT TEH HELL!!!!!!?
CHEECH: HAHAHA.....it was packed with my smelly underpants, i STOLE YOUR STASH!!!
And feel free to keep the doritos!
SHCHEEVONE: BLAZE IS RUNNING!!! RICO AND JACK AND FLY-T ARE TOO....THEIR CHASING CHEECH AND CHONG DOWN.....
crowd pops
SHCHEEVONE: ITS JD!!! HE STOPPED CHEECH IN HIS TRACKS!.....MY GOD!? THRILLING POINT!!!! ON CHEECH MARIN!!! HE DROPPED HIM!!!.....BLAZE GRABBED HIS STASH!!....HIGH FIVES ALL AROUND...
JD: Lets go boys.
FLY-T: Somebody go get the bong.
RICO: and those DORITOS!
the 5 pot heads make their way out to a pumped crowd, chanting "weed rules, weed rules"
SHCHEEVONE: CHEECH MARIN BEAT UP!!! I CAN"T BELIEVE HE TRIED TO STEEL BLAZES STASH!....man, lets get a breather and take a look at Ellis Jackson's title win.....
"The Corperate Raider" Ellis Jackson - 11/23/99
SHCHEEVONE: Jackson's up, but just barely!! He moves back on the attack and
Stallion reeling from that shot to the head with the briefcase! Jackson whips him into the ropes,
Stal with a duck under and he puts on the breaks, he sets himself and YES!! THUNDERING
HOOVES!! HE NAILED IT!! He’s not going for the pin here though! He’s calling for it again,
REINBUSTER!! IT’S ON FOLKS AND THIS TIME IN THE CENTER OF THE RING!! The
ref checking Ellis again and he looks to be out cold this time!! The ref has his hand up once and
we’ve got a one count!! WAIT A MINUTE!!... Here comes Rob Howells!! WHAT’S HE DOING
HERE?! He was looking for Stallion earlier and he found him! Howells waving a piece of paper
in Stallion’s face and screaming at him! The ref checking Ellis again and there’s the two!
Stallion is gonna win this thing folks! Howells still screaming and Stal staring at him in shock
now!
What’s going on here folks, WAIT A MINUTE! Stal just dropped the reinbuster and he’s
over to the ropes! He’s looking at that piece of paper and shaking his head no! I don’t know what
he sees but it has clearly upset him! Ellis staggering back to his feet and roll up!! HE ROLLED
UP STALLION! Handful of tights and the ref down for the count,
1………………..2……………….3!!!!! OH MY BLOODY GOD!! ELLIS JACKSON IS THE
NEW WORLD CHAMPION!! NEW CHAMPION FOLKS!! Stallion looks upset but he’s out of
the ring and headed for the back!! What the hell was on that piece of paper Dave?! Now Howells
chasing after him and this is just too much!! What an INCREDIBLE FIGHT!! OVERVIEW: Never before have I seen such a bizarre twist of events, but what's
the deal with Thad?
SCHEEVONE: Up next we have a thirty minute ‘Ironman’ match between Dark Fang and Case, whoever has the most pinfalls, submissions, DQ’s or count-outs in that time will be deemed the winner.
Dark Fang’s music is queued up and he walks to the ring to a mixed reaction from the crowd, he seems undeterred by their response as he slides under the ropes and starts to bounce off the ropes.
OVERVIEW: Fang hasn’t had a match in the UWF for a while, it’ll be interesting to see what shape he’s in.
Case’s music replaces that of Dark Fang’s as the UWF’s newer superstar walks out to a chorus of boo’s from the capacity crowd. ‘The Baron’ seems annoyed by the crowds response but he steps between the ropes and tries to ignore it.
SCHEEVONE: Case’s actions of late haven’t endeared him to this crowd.
WESSIN: Who cares what these people think?!?!
Dark Fang grabs a mic
DARK FANG: Case, I have no problems with you... but I wanted a peice of your hide just to see what it was made of for a looooooooong time, boyo. Its hunting time!!! ARRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
Iron Man Match
OVERVIEW: these are two of the most feered men in UWF history....i can't wait for it to start.
RIGGS: fart?....don't mind if i do.
WESSIN: NO! HE SAID 'START'......EEEEEEEEEWWW GROSS!
OVERVIEW: that was me.
SCHEEVONE: Good lord..... The bell is sounded and we’re underway, Case and Fang lock up before Case sends Fang into the ropes, clothesline attempt by Case is ducked by Fang who counters with a high cross body and there’s the first cover….1…..2……Case with an easy kick-out! Both men know they have to go for it all in these thirty minutes, they seem ready to do whatever it takes to pull out the victory. Fang with some vicious right hands that back Case into the ropes, kick to the stomach….AND A KNEE LIFT THAT SENDS THE YOUNGER MAN OVER THE ROPES AND TO THE FLOOR! DARK FANG WAITS FOR CASE TO GET TO HIS FEET….SLINGSHOT OVER THE ROPES……CAUGHT BY CASE…TURNED INTO A BODY SLAM! Case starts to put the boots to Fang on the floor as the referee tries to get both men back in the ring. Case grabs Fang….STUN GUN ON THE GUARD RAIL! FANG IS BLEEDING FROM THE MOUTH AS CASE THROWS HIM BACK IN THE RING AND CLIMBS TO THE TOP ROPE……FLYING CLOTHESLINE! THERE’S A COVER BY CASE….1…..2…..FANG ROLLS HIS SHOULDER!
OVERVIEW: Case is really showing us that tenacity he’s famed for!
SCHEEVONE: Case sends Fang into the ropes, drop kick……NO…..FANG HOLDS ONTO THE ROPES AND CASE HITS THE MAT! Fang grabs his legs….SLINGSHOTS CASE OVER THE TOP ROPE AND TO THE FLOOR! FANG OUTSIDE AND IS WAILING ON CASE’S CHEST WITH SOME HARD FOREARM SHOTS! GRABS CASE….RAMS HIM HARD ON THE RAILING BEFORE THROWING HIM BACK INTO THE RING.
WESSIN: Whew…these two aren’t stopping for breath are they?!?!
SCHEEVONE: Snap suplex by Dark Fang and Case is holding his back as he struggles back to his feet. Side back breaker by Fang and now he holds him there and applies pressure as the ref asks Case if he wants to give up.
OVERVIEW: Look at Case’s face, he’s in real pain but he isn’t giving up.
WESSIN: He’s got twenty minutes to go, he’d be better off going one down to Dark Fang than risk serious injury!
SCHEEVONE: The ref is in Case’s face asking him if he gives but he’s saying no, Case reaches up….pokes Fang in the eye and the hold is broken!
WESSIN: Hah…you don’t get any more technical than the old finger in the eye!
SCHEEONE: Fang is holding his eye as Case gets back to his feet, wild swing of his fist by Dark Fang that Case ducks and nails him with a spinebuster. Now Case sits on top of Fang and starts to drill him with right hand after right hand! The ref grabs Case and tells him to get off him!
WESSIN: Go on Case…nail him as well!
SCHEEVONE: Case drags Fang up and whips him hard into the turnbuckle, he backs up and then charges at Fang….FANG MOVES OUT THE WAY AND CASE HITS HARD!
RING ANNOUNCER: There are fifteen minutes left….fifteen minutes left.
SCHEEVONE: Fang is on the top rope as Case struggles once more to get to his feet…..420 DEGREE MOONSAULT BY FANG! CASE’S HEAD BOUNCED HARD OFF THE CANVAS AS THE REF COUNTS THE PIN….1….2…..3!!!! DARK FANG PINS CASE AND GOES ONE NIL UP!
OVERVIEW: Case has fifteen minutes to try to level this thing up…or even win!
SCHEEVONE: The ref signals to re-start and Fang is all over Case as he tries to win a second pin, he’s kicking him to the outside the of the ring as the ref tells him to break it up, the ref is in between Fang and the ropes as Case gets to his feet. Case back on the apron…….SUPLEX ON FANG! DARK FANG IS SUPLEXED TO THE OUTSIDE AND HITS THE GROUND HARD! NOW CASE STANDS ON THE APRON AND WAITS…….LEG DROP FOM THE APRON AND FANG IS IN DEEP TROUBLE! CASE NOW RETURNING THE FAVOUR AND IS JUST UNLOADING ON FANG’S HEAD WITH SOME WICKED RIGHT HANDS!
RING ANNOUNCER: There are ten minutes left….ten minutes left.
OVERVIEW: Case must have heard, he’s thrown Fang back in the ring!
SCHEEVONE: Double arm suplex by Case into a dragon sleeper! What a move! He’s cinching down on Fang but he won’t quit….Case looks determined as he grinds down on the move as the ref checks on Dark Fang!
WESSIN: Knowing that daft bastard Fang he’ll just lie in the dragon sleeper for ten minutes if he’ll win!
SCHEEVONE: It looks as if Case thinks that too, he’s thrown Fang aside and is looking for a new way of getting a decision in his favour.
RING ANNOUNCER: There are five minutes left…five minutes left.
WESSIN: Jeez is his watch fast?!?!
SCHEEVONE: Hard to believe but only five minutes left….these two men have being going toe to toe since the opening bell and how the time has flown! Case on the top rope wait for Fang to get up…..BULLDOG FROM THE TOP ROPE! CASE FLOATS OVER FOR A COVER……1……2……3, NO, NO, NO! SOMEOHOW FANG KICKED OUT AND CASE IS IN SHOCK!
OVERVIEW: He needs to start going to town on Fang if he wants to avoid losing!
SCHEEVONE: Thumb to the eye by Fang followed by a chop to Case’s throat, Fang looks like he’s trying to wear down the clock!
RING ANNOUNCER: There are two minutes left….two minutes left.
SCHEEVONE: Fang with an Irish whip to the other turnbuckle and Case hits hard, Fang charges after him…CASE MOVES OUT THE WAY…GERMAN SUPLEX BY CASE….THERE’S THE BRIDGE FOR THE PIN AND THE REF COUNTS….1…..2…..3!!!! CASE LEVELS THIS MATCH UP WITH AROUND ONE MINUTE FORTY FIVE SECONDS LEFT!
OVERVIEW: Now suddenly Case becomes the favourite to win because of the condition of Fang!
SCHEEVONE: The referee starts the match and Case charges at Fang! Knee lift by Case followed by an elbow drop and there’s the cover….1….2…..FOOT ON THE ROPE! DARK FANG HAS HIS FOOT ON THE ROPE! CASE CAN’T BELIEVEW IT AS HE PICKS UP FANG….LOW BLOW! A LOW BLOW BY DARK FANG BUT THE REF DIDN’T SEE ANYTHING!
RING ANNOUNCER: There is one minute left…ONE MINUTE LEFT!
SCHEEVONE: Dark fang grabs case….POWERBOMB BY DARK FANG! NOW HE GOES UP TOP…..BIG SPLASH! THERE’S THE COVER……1…..2…….CASE KICKS OUT! FANG CAN’T BELIEVE CASE KICKED OUT AND IS STOMPING ON CASE’S THROAT!
RING ANNOUNCER: There is thirty seconds left…..JUST THIRTY SEONDS LEFT!
WESSIN: He’s building his part up isn’t he?!?!
SCHEEVONE: Fang rams Case’s head into the turnbuckle repeatedly before turning him round and punching him in the gut….WE’RE DOWN TO TWENTY SECONDS! IRISH WHIP TO THE TURNBUCKLE ONCE MORE AND YET AGAIN CASE HITS HARD….TEN SECONDS! FANG MOVES IN….ELBOW TO THE FAVE BY CASE….CASE CLOSED! CASE WITH THE CASE CLOSED AND WE’RE ON FIVE SECONDS, THER’S THE COVER…..1….2…..3!!!! CASE PINS DARK FANG FOR A TWO ONE LEAD…..AND THERE’S THE BELL, THIS MATCH IS OVER….CASE WINS TWO ONE! WHAT A MATCH, BOTH MEN GAVE IT EVERYTHING!
OVERVIEW: What a recovery by Case, but you have to feel sorry for Dark Fang, he was so close!
SCHEEVONE: Case leaves the ring with a hard fought victory tucked in his belt, he will be remembered as possibly the most dangerous power wrestler in the UWF.. we’ll be right back after we take a look at PJ Brown's triumph as he became the world champ.
"The God" PJ Brown - 01/21/00
SHCHEEVONE: Whew, I think I’m okay, and right you are Dave!! Tony eyeing PJ, waiting for him to strike. The God with a lazy right hook, DODGED! Tony with a kick to the stomach, DDT!!! THE GOD IS DDTED ON THE GROUND!!! Tony is hot here, and the crowd is behind him! Tony is fixing to throw PJ out of the ring now.... WAIT A MINUTE DAVE!! CHECK THE UWFTRON!! It says "The Broken Era. Operation Garar. T-3 minutes 10 seconds"! This is exciting! What's going to happen, Overview?
OVERVIEW: I don't have a clue, oh DAMNIT! PJ JUST SLID DOWN CANOLLI'S BACK! HE IS GOING TO CLOTHESLINE TONY OUT OF THE RING, AHH BROWN MISSED! Tony is backing up now, getting back into the center of the ring where it is safe....PJ is walking up to Tony, both are pretty spent! What a battle! Tony looks determined, PJ rushes towards Tony, AHHH! MOZZERALLA STICK RIGHT TO THE GOD'S FACE! PJ IS DOWN! THE CROWD IS GOING NUTS! THROW HIM OUT OF THE RING TONY!
SHCHEEVONE: No! Tony is waiting, he sees God stirring, he wants to make sure PJ is down and out so Tony doesn't get countered when he tries to throw PJ out, like what almost happened before!
OVERVIEW: PJ up now again, the match is taking it's toll on the two men, PJ with a few punches, TIE UP! HOLY SH*T! FETTICUNE ALFREDO!! MY GOD! IMPLANT DDT ON PJ! I DON'T BELIEVE IT! PJ IS SURELY DOWN FOR GOOD! THROW HIS ASS OUT OF THE RING, DAMNIT!
SHCHEEVONE: The crowd is chanting "To-ny, Ton-y"! Ilana is at ringside cheering Tony on! What the hell?! Tony sees PJ stirring on the floor, where the hell is Canolli going?! TOP ROPE! TONY JUST CLIMBED ON THE TOP ROPE! TONY IS GETTING SET FOR HIS FINISHER! THE PASTA PRIMAVERA!
OVERVIEW: If Tony falls, he loses the match and PJ is champ! Be careful, Tony!
SHCHEEVONE: PJ to his feet, Tony is on the ropes behind him! PJ turns around!! CONNECTED! PASTA PRIMAVERA!! PASTA PRIMAVERA!! MY GOD!! WE HAVE A NEW CHAMPION IF TONY THROWS PJ OUT OF THE RING!!
OVERVIEW: LOOK AT THE COUNTDOWN TO THE BROKEN ERA, IT IS SLOWLY WINDING DOWN!! 10 SECONDS! 9 SECONDS!!!
SHCHEEVONE: The crowd is counting down too, Tony is slinging PJ's limp body over his shoulder and walking over to the ropes, he is watching the countdown too!
The UWFtron is counting FIVE...FOUR....THREE....TWO...ONE!!!!!
All the lighting turns bright red as the crowd screams in excitement. Tony is paused right by the ropes with a lifeless PJ over his shoulder. Then "The Urban Legend" biG bAd bReAkeR races down the entrance ramp to the ring!! Breaker grabs a steel chair by the announce booth and runs into the ring with it!!
SHCHEEVONE: My God, Breaker has a metal folding chair and he is running up to Tony! What the hell does he want?
OVERVIEW: Is this The Broken Era?! Is this Operation Garar?!
SHCHEEVONE: The crowd is chanting "A-O-D, A-O-D" now, Breaker is standing right in Tony's face waving the chair! He wants Tony to drop the God on the canvas so Breaker can hit him! That is what it looks like he is saying!
OVERVIEW: Tony looks confused, then he smiles and tosses the lifeless PJ on the mat, Breaker holds the chair in the air above PJ! No! Breaker is going to brutalize PJ Brown! Listen to this crowd pop!
SHCHEEVONE: Tony catching a quick breather as Breaker holds the chair high above his head, looking at PJ's fallen body! BREAKER KICKS BROWN ASIDE!! WHAT THE BLOODY F*CK!!!! BREAKER JUST ROLLED BROWN OUT OF THE WAY!!TONY LOOKING UP AT BREAKER NOW IN SHOCK, AAAUGGHH!! HOLY LORD!! BREAKER JUST CLOCKED TONY CANOLLI IN THE FACE WITH THE CHAIR!! BREAKER JUST NAILED TONY CANOLLI IN THE HEAD WITH A STEEL CHAIR ON PURPOSE!! TONY IS BUSTED OPEN AND OUT COLD ON THE CANVAS NEXT TO PJ!!! THE CROWD IS ROARING!! THIS PLACE IS DEAFENING !!! THEY ARE BOOING TRIPLE B!!
OVERVIEW: DAMNIT!! This isn't right! What a damn shame! We had a new champion!!
SHCHEEVONE: BREAKER IS SAVAGELY BEATING CANOLLI'S BODY WITH THAT CHAIR!! LOOK AT ALL THE BLOOD!! HE IS TRYING TO BASH CANOLLI'S HEAD IN EVEN MORE!! BREAKER HAS SNAPPED!! BREAKER IS MANGLING CANOLLI WITH THAT STEEL CHAIR!! THE CROWD IS CHANTING "BREAKER SUCKS, BREAKER SUCKS"!!
OVERVIEW: BREAKER puts a few shots into Tony's gut, and his face, MY GOD HOW HORRIBLE! No! Breaker just slammed the chair into Tony's genitals! What a blatant low blow! THE CROWD IS GOING CRAZY! SOMEONE STOP THIS! OUR TWO FINAL COMPETITORS ARE OUT COLD AND FATALLY BLEEDING!!
SHCHEEVONE: Breaker is calling for a mic, now..let's hope he can explain himself....
BREAKER: (talking over deafening heat) WELCOME TO.................THE BROKEN ERA!!!
crowd boos even louder
Breaker walks over to Tony's fallen body and kicks it. He spits on it, and tosses the mic to the side.
SHCHEEVONE: NOOOO!!!! BREAKER JUST PICKED UP TONY'S BODY AND TOSSED IT OVER THE TOP ROPE!!!! PJ BROWN IS OUR WORLD CHAMPION!!! DAMNIT!!! IT IS A DAMN SHAME!!!!!
BOOM!!!!!
SHCHEEVONE: the God was ontop of the world for a short time thanks to Opperation GARAR.....ah the memories.
OVERVIEW: twas one of the bleekest of eras.
‘God Save the Queen’ blares out as Lawrence Stanley and Alfred walk down to the ring to a thunderous pop from the crowd, the fans favourite looks psyched up as he makes his way to the ring.
SCHEEVONE: HAS THERE EVER BEEN A MORE POPULAR WRESTLER IN THE UWF THAN LAWRENCE STANLEY?!?!
WESSIN: You want to take any more of his dick there Scheevone?!?!
‘Natural Born Thrillers’ is queued up and JD Lawson walks out with the UWF World title strapped round his waist, he looks straight ahead at Stanley before throwing the title to the ground and charging at the ring.
The UWF's Last Ever World Title Match
SCHEEVONE: THESE TWO AREN’T WASTING ANY TIME! THE LONGEST RUNNING FEUD IN THE UWF IS GOING TO BE SETTLED HERE TONIGHT, AND THERE’S THE SMALL MATTER OF A TITLE DEFENSE TOO! STANLEY AND LAWSON ARE TRADING SHOTS IN THE MIDDLE OF THE RING, RIGHT AFTER RIGHT BY BOTH MEN, NEITHER GIVING AN INCH! LAWSON BACKS STANLEY INT TO ROPES WITH SOME VICIOUS SHOTS, WHIPS HIM INTO THE ROPES, REVERSED BY THE GENT…….BIG TIME CLOTHESLINE SENDS LAWSON TO THE FLOOR AND STANLEY’S ON TOP OF HIM LAYING IN SOME HEAVY DUTY RIGHTS!
OVERVIEW: If this is any indication of the match it may not last long at this pace!
SCHEEVONE: Stanley picks up Lawson, nails him with an atomic drop that sends him over the top rope! Stanley climbs to the top rope and waits for Lawson to get up…DIVES OFF…MISSES LAWSON AND LANDS ON THE GUARD RAIL! Lawson up and he slams Stanley back first into the railing before picking up some cable from a TV camera and choking the life out of the Gent!
WESSIN: it looks like the ref is going to let it go….there’s no way he’d dare DQ either of them in their last match!
SCHEEVONE: Stanley looks out of breath as Lawson picks him up and throws him head first at the Spanish announcers table and now he sends Stanley’s head into one of their TV’s!
WESSIN: Don’t sweat it senors, this is the last time it will happen to you!
SCHEEVONE: Lawson climbs to the top rope and steadies himself…LEAPS OFF….
SMASH!!!!
SCHEEVONE: BIG SPLASH FROM JD LAWSON! STANLEY WENT THROUGH THE SPANISH ANNOUNCER’S TABLE! HEMUST BE BROKEN UP INSIDE AS LAWSON STAGGERS TO HIS FEET. STANLEY IS SLOW TO GET UP AS LAWSON GRABS A STEEL CHAIR…SWINGS…DUCKED BY THE GENT…KICK TO LAWSON’S GUT…DDT ON THE STEEL CHAIR! LAWSON IS CUT OPEN ON HIS FOREHEAD! BOTH MEN ARE DOWN AND OUT ON THE OUTSIDE!
OVERVIEW: It seems Wessin was right, the ref is just letting them go at it.
SCHEEVONE: Stanley throws Lawson inside but the Gent is just as shook up as Lawson, scoop slam by the Gent and he follows it up with a knee drop and we have a cover…1…….2……Lawson kicks out but that head injury looks bad! Stanley stands him up as he bounces off the rope…FLYING FOREARM SHOT THAT SENDS LAWSON DOWN AND SPRAWLING OUT THE RING! STANLEY LOOKS A LITTLE DAZED AS WELL AS HE SQUATS IN THE MIDDLE OF THE RING AS LAWSON SUCKS UP SOME AIR ON THE OUTSIDE! LAWSON ON THE APRON AS STANLEY WALKS OVER, RIGHT HAND BY LAWSON IS BLOCKED, GRABBED BY STANLEY….SUPLEX BACK INTO THE RING AND INTO A COVER….1….2……ROLL OF THE SHOULDER BY LAWSON!
OVERVIEW: Stanley’s come to play tonight!
SCHEEVONE: The Gent sends Lawson into the ropes, back body drop is countered with a kick to the face and followed up by a swinging neckbreaker by the champion. Both men down as the ref starts the count….1…..2……3….4…..5…..6…….7….8…..9….Lawson is up as Stanley gets to one knee, hard right hand by Lawson followed by a knee lift as Lawson goes up top…….SENTON BOMB BY LAWSON AS HE TURNS IT INTO A VARIATION OF A ROLLING BRIDGE……1…..2……STANLE POWERS UP AND TURNS IT INTO A BACKSLIDE…..1…..2…….KICK OUT BY LAWSON WHO QUICKLY DROPS THE GENT WITH A SHORT CLOTHESLINE! Whew…the pace is frantic in there! Lawson looks psyched as he rolls outside and goes under the ring…he’s pulling out….A STACK OF TABLES! THERE’S FOUR TABLES THERE AS HE SLOWLY ASSEMBLES THEM OUTSIDE AND STACKS THEM ONE ON TOP OF THE OTHER. HE GRABS STANLEY FROM IN THE RING AND PLACES HIM ON THE TOP ONE!
OVERVIEW: Lawson is pulling a ladder from under the ring…what’s he up to?
SCHEEONE: He’s placing the ladder just inside the ring, it towers above the top rope….Lawson is on top of the ladder…GOOD GOD HE COULD KILL STANLEY…HE LEAPS OFF….
CRASH!!!!
SMASH!!!!
CRASH!!!!
SMASH!!!!
SCHEEVONE: SWEET MOTHER OF GOD I DON’T BELIEVE WHAT I’VE JUST SEEN! JD LAWSON JUST NAILEDLLAWRENBCE STANLEY WITH THE RETURN TO LUNACY AND SENT HIM THROUGH FOUR TABLES! THERE IS WOOD EVERYWHERE AND IN THE MIDDLE LIES THE GENT WHO APPEARS TO BE SPITTING OUT BLOOD! LAWSON IS SLOWLY GETTING TO HIS FEET AND HE ROLLS THE LOLLING GENT INTO THE RING AND SLOWLY COVERS HIM……1…….2……STANLEY KICKS OUT! STANLEY KICKS OUT! I DON’T THINK I’VE EVER SEENS SOMEONE KICK OUT OF SUCH A DEVASTATING MOVE BEFORE!
OVERVIEW: Tonight really is a special night!
SCHEEVONE: Lawson is a shocked as we are as he connects wit a European uppercut that sends the gent into the turnbuckle…Lawson charges in…STANLEY WITH A ACK DROP THAT SENDS LAWSON ONTO THE STEEL STEPS! THAT MAY BUY THE GENT ENOUGH TIME TO KNOW WHERE HE IS! HE FALLS THROUGH THE ROPES THROUGHINSTINCT AND REACHES OUT FOR LAWSON…HE GRABS HIM…
CLANG!!!!
SCHEEVONE: FACEDOWN ON THE STEEL STEPS! FACEDOWN ON THE STEEL STEPS! JD LAWSON’S FACE IS A MASK OF CRIMSON! BOTH MEN ARE HANGING OVER THE STEEL STEPS, BOTH MEN ARE VIRTUALLY SPENT! STANLEY GETS UP FIRST AND GETS IN THE RING BEFORE DRAGGING THE NEAR UNCONSCIOUS CHAMP IN AND COVERING HIM…..1…..2….LAWSON ROLLS THE SHOULDER! THAT’S TWICE I’VE SEEN A KICK-OUT THAT I THOUGHT I NEVER WOULD HAVE! WHERE ARE THEY FINDING THIS DESIRE?!?!
WESSIN: These two are scaring me, they’re having the shit beat out of them and they’re still going at it!
SCHEEVONE: Stanley grabs Lawson and sends him into the ropes…reversed by Lawson…reversed by Stanley again…reversed once again by Lawson….STANLEY GOES STRAIGHT INTO THE REFEREE! THE REF HAS BEEN KNOCKED OUT COLD AND OUT OF THE RING! STANLEY TURNS ROUND GROGGILY…THRILLING POINT BY LAWSON! HE PINS STANLEY BUT THERE’S NO REF! 1….2…3….LAWSON COULD HAVE HAD THE PIN BUT THE REF IS OUT! LAWSON GETS UP AND GOES TO SEE WHERE THE REF IS, HE TRIES TO REVIVE HIM BUT NO JOY. STANLEY IS UP AND LAWSON DOESN’T REALISE, LAWSON TURNS ROUND…SPINNING CHOKESLAM BY STANLEY AND NOW ITS HIS TURN TO PIN LAWSON….1……2….3….STANLEY COULD HAVE WON THE MATCH NOW BUT AGAIN THE REF IS NOWHERE TO BE SEEN!
OVERVIEW: What else is going to happen tonight?!?!
SCHEEVONE: Stanley gets up in disgust and goes to the outside, he picks up the ladder that Lawson used earlier and brings it in the ring and sets it up, he starts to climb it with his eyes set on Lawson.
OVERVIEW: He better hurry up because Lawson is slowly coming too!
SCHEEVONE: Lawson has dragged himself to his feet using the ropes and is lurching over to the ladder as Stanley wearily makes his way to the top….LAWSON IS BEGINNING TO CLIMB THE LADDER TOO! STANLEY IS AT THE TOP OF IT AND LAWON HAS JOINED HIM! STANLEY PUNCHES HIM IN THE FACE, LAWON RETURNS THE FAVOUR…..THE PAIR OF THEM ARE SWAPPING RIGHT HANDS AT THE TOP OF THE LADDER!
WESSIN: That damn ladder is swinging wildly…..AND ITS IN FRONT OF US!
SCHEEVONE: WESSIN HAS A POINT, WITH EVERY RIGHT HAND THE LADDER IS ROCKING WILDLY! STANLEY THROWS A RIGHT HAND, LAWON DOES ALSO…AW SHIT RUN GUYS!
CRASH!!!!
SCHEEVONE: CAN YOU HEAR ME? STANLEY AND LAWSON JUST FELL OFF THE LADDER AND THROUGH OUR ANNOUNCERS TABLE…..DAVE AND WESSIN ARE WIPED OUT AND SO IS THE TWO FIGHTERS! BOTH MENAREN’T MOVING…NEITHER IS THE REF COME TO MENTION IT! WHAT IS GOING TO HAPPEN? WAIT…WHO’S THIS COMING DOWN…ITS IKE! IKE IS HERE AND HE’S CARRYING A MIC....what the hell?
IKE: One of ya honkeys better get the fuck up befo Ike puts his big black foot up yo ass.....
SHCHEEVONE: What the hell is Ike doing?.....JD and Stanley are out cold.
OVERVIEW: Here comes EMTs....Ike is making them backoff.
IKE: not so fast yal....this match aint over. See, tonight i'm takin yal on a little trip back in time to when IKE ran the show. And when IKE ran the show Ike wouldn't put up with a no contest for a world title match at a PPV.......
EMT GUY: but sir, they can't get up.
IKE: I got an idea......hold up.....
Ike starts rummaging under the ring
SHCHEEVONE: …..A BLOWTORCH?!?! HE’S OVER BY ME AND IS TAKING A LOOK AT STANLEY AND LAWSON BUT THEY’RE OUT OF IT. HE’S AT THE TIMEKEEPER’S TABLE AND HE HAS THE WORLD TITLE IN HIS HANDS……
IKE: If neither of this punks can win this title, Ike's gonna have to make like it was Tommy Gunn's fat mumma and split it right down the middle!!!
SHCHEEVONE:.....HE’S TORCHING THE TITLE! HE’S CUTTING IT IN TWO! MY GOD WHAT IS HE DOING?!?! HE HAS CUT THE MOST PRIZED TITLE IN PROFESSINAL WRESTLING IN TWO!!! ONLY IKE WOULD PULL SOMETHING LIKE THIS!!! HE PLACED ONE HALF OF THE TITLE ON THE MANGLED BODIES OF STANLEY AND LAWSON! I GUESS THAT IS THE ONLY FAIR THING TO DO! BOTH MEN HAVE NEARLY PUT THEIR CAREERS ON THE LINE FOR US TNIGHT AND NOW THEY ARE PAYING FOR IT AS EMT’S FLOOD TO RINGSIDE!
EMT’s run down and start tending to Lawson, Stanley and the ref. A few look over at Overview and Wessin.
SCHEEVONE: I’m on my own folks as both JD Lawson and Lawrence Stanley are being carried back to the locker room to a standing ovation from this crowd! Stay with us, we’ve more to come…God help us commentators!
IKE: No worries Mitch, Ike'll sit in fo the next match....hey Riggsey, done hidin?
RIGGS: I like fire.
IKE: Honkey please.....lets get to the next damn match.....what is it?
SHCHEEVONE: Well....lets see.....it looks like its BBB vs Canolli? By the way what was that message you got at the top of the show?
IKE: don't worry bout that boy, it aint none yo' buissiness.
"U can't C Me" by 2 Pac hits the PA....the crowd errupts.....the camera spots a sign that reads "Bring back the Broken Era". suddenly BBB, Robin and Blaze walk out to a huge erruption.....they get to the ring and wait, Breaker straightening his gloves
IKE: look at that little wigger punk. I just can't wait til i stuff my black foot so far up his ass he has to move my toes out the way to floss them buck teeth of his.
RIGGS: dumps like a truck, truck, truck.....thighs like what, what, what....
"Are You Ready" by Creed hits the PA as Tony C walks out to a massive pop. the crowd is chanting "To-ny, To-ny"....Canolli looks rarin to go as pyros pop behind him
Everything goes
IKE: this is preposterous. These fans don't give a damn about either of these punks....all these care 'bout is watchin Ike spank Stallions white ass in 15 minutes.....this match aint nothin but filler.
SHCHEEVONE: 2 world champs, filler?
IKE: yah damn right, Ike is runnin the show again, and that means Tony C and BBB are filler again just like the old days.
SHCHEEVONE: Here goes......Breaker and Canolli lock up...BBB slams him down quick and drops the elbow hard on Canolli....BBB already talking trash.
IKE: thats cus he is trash....
SHCHEEVONE: Canolli springs up and ducks a right hand....kick to the gut....BACK BODY DROP! a pin.....1, easy kick out!
IKE: Would somebody get Ike a damn sam'ich.....goddamn, its bad enough i gotta sit through this.
SHCHEEVONE: this is tremendous action.....Canolli with an irish whip HARD INTO THE CORNER......a run at Breaker, he gets out of the way, rollup....reversed......REVERSED AGAIN........1..........2.....NO!!! CANOLLI REVERSED IT.............1...............2........NO!!! BREAKER KICKED OUT!
RIGGS: mmmmm, fruit rollups.
IKE:Tell me again, how did he win the world title?
SHCHEEVONE: you know damn well how.....you think an idiot like him could win it on his own? meanwhile.....Breaker with some rights....KNIFE EDGE!!! AND ANOTHER!!! Backing Tony up....BIG CLOTHESLINE OVER THE ROPES.......breaker off the ropes, baseball slide by breaker!! Tony smashes into the guard rail.....HERE COMES BREAKER!!!...........SUICIDE DIVE!!!! OH NO!!
BREAKER'S HEAD SPLIT OPEN ON THE RAIL!
IKE:speekin of split open, tell yo wife i said hi.
SHCHEEVONE: you bastard.....WAIT!!! Tony is stomping a mudwhole in BBB....ROBIN UP FROM BEHIND.....Tony sensed her, but he doesn't see....BLAZE!!!
SHCHEEVONE: TONY IS SPLIT EAR TO EAR!!!....Breaker stumbles up and grabs Tony.....BELLY TO BACK ON THE OUTSIDE!!! here's a cover...........1...............2............NO! NO! Tony kicked out!
IKE: Robin from behind eh? not a bad fuckin idea!
RIGGS: hehe, he said behind.
SHCHEEVONE: Oh look....here are Wessin and Overview, patched up and rarin to go again.......BBB JUST RAMED TONY INTO THE GUARD RAIL....now he's choking him with the TV cables.
IKE: yal know what, I'm gettin the hell outta here....i gotta get ready to punk that hick Stallion in about 10 minutes, so Dave, why don't yal put the headset on and give us all a taste of the insightfull knoledge yal display.
WESSIN: hi Ike.
IKE: please, Wes, for the sake of both of us, get yo head out my ass.
SHCHEEVONE: Well thanks for joining us Ike....boy oh boy what a match , a flurry of brawling on the outside and Canolli has BBB by the head.....RIGHT INTO THE RING STAIRS!!! now canolli grabs the ring bell.....WATCHOUT!....
OVERVIEW: NOW WHAT....Canolli going after Blaze....might be a bad move, ROBIN JUST CAME AT HIM!!! That right hand didn't phase him....WAIT!!! LOOK OUT!!! BREAKER WITH A FLYING CROSSBODYBLOCK JUST FLOORED CANOLLI.............1................2...............3!!NO!NO! Breaker is arguing.....now he's telling Blaze to get a table......BREAKER CALLING FOR A TABLE!!!......
OVERVIEW: here it comes.....
SHCHEEVONE: what is he.....BREAKER GOING TO THE APRON....He has Canolli....Blaze is helping out....NO!! IT CAN'T BE!!?.....B-BOMB THREW THE-
OVERVIEW: I HEARD BONES BREAK!!!
RIGGS: i didn't know your bone could break.....man, i gotta take more care of mine.
WESSIN: me too.
SHCHEEVONE: Breaker picks up Canolli again....WAIT! CANOLLI GRABBED A SHOVEL FROM UNDER THE RING.....LOW BLOW!!! BOTH MEN DROP!!!
OVERVIEW: WHAT A TREMENDOUS MOVE!
SHCHEEVONE: My God, Dave, this match is turning out to one of the more brutal encounters between Tony Canolli and the Breaker....it will be hard to top the Bad Blood Match and the match at Shipwrecked2, but if this match keeps going like it has, it will go above and beyond.
OVERVIEW: They have impressed me already, Mitch....my god...both men lying in the ring bloody and beaten.... This match can only be won by pinfall No coutnouts or DQs.
SHCHEEVONE: I'm willing to bet both men are unconcious right now... WESSIN: BOO-RIIING!!! BOOORING!!!
SHCHEEVONE: Would you shut up J-Wes?! YES!! BOTH MEN ARE GETTING UP!! TONY CANOLLI AND BREAKER ARE STUMBLING TO THEIR FEET!!! What is this?! Breaker is walking away from Tony....Breaker is jogging up to the referee in the ring!! What is going on here....BREAKER JUST GAVE THE REF A FIFTY DOLLAR BILL!! He just slipped the ref money!! Now the ref....THE REF IS HOLDING TONY CANOLLI'S ARMS BACK!! THE REF JUST GOT BRIBED AND IS HOLDING TONY'S ARMS BEHIND HIS BACK!! BREAKER AS A SHOVEL!! BREAKER IS HOLDING IT HIGH ABOVE HIS HEAD!! NOOOOO!!! THIS IS BY FAR, ONE OF THE CHEAPEST SHOTS IN THE HISTORY OF THE UWF----
(Suddenly, the AoD theme blasts from the speakers as the crowd is shocked and turns around to see Ex Lawrence Stanley, and Agent Steele running down to the ring in the attire that the 2nd version of AOD wore.)
SHCHEEVONE: What the hell is THIS?!! THE MEMBERS OF THE LAST INCARNATION OF AOD ARE HERE TO HELP TONY!! I SMELL A REFORMATION!!! BREAKER is going to get SCREWED and he deserves it!!
OVERVIEW: EX, LAWRENCE STANLEY, and AGENT STEELE charge the ring...WHAT THE HELL?!! The ref just let go Tony, and he pulled out a LEAD PIPE!! Breaker's got that SHOVEL!! BREAKER and TONY are turning to face Ex, Stanley, and AGENT STEELE!!!
SMACK!! CLANG!! SMACK!!
SHCHEEVONE: WHAT IN GOD'S NAME IS GOING ON?!?! BREAKER AND TONY JUST DESTROYED EX, STANLEY, AND AGENT STEELE!! AND NOW THEY ARE RIPPING THE AOD SHIRTS OFF OF THEM!! WHAT IN THE---NOW THE LIGHTS ARE GOING OFF!!! IT'S COMPLETELY DARK!! I CAN'T SEE A DAMN THING!!
WESSIN: Hold me, Mitch.
BOOM!!
(The lights come on with a huge blast of pyros as "Welcome To The Jungle" by Guns N Roses blasts from the speakers. Standing on the entrance ramp are "The Savior" Chris Sweet and Vinny Deducci with their arms in the old "AOD" symbol. The crowd roars in an absolutely deafening crowd pop that rocks the very foundation of the building. The two run down to the ring and slap hands and hug with Breaker and Tony Canolli.)
SHCHEEVONE:MY GOD I WAS RIGHT, AOD REFORMED, BUT NOT IN THE WAY I EXPECTED AT ALL!! THE OLD AOD IS BACK STRONG WITH THE MEMBERS OF THE NEW INCARNATION LYING FACE DOWN AND FULL OF BLOOD IN THE RING!! WILL YOU LISTEN TO THIS CROWD!! I CAN BARELY HEAR MYSELF TALKING....THIS IS SOMETHING I WOULD HAVE NEVER EXPECTED TO SEE...BREAKER AND TONY SIDE BY SIDE!!! GOOD LORD!! BREAKER'S GOT THE MIC......
BREAKER: (the crowd sings along with him loudly) ONCE AGAIN, A--O--D HAS COME BACK--TO--SEE.......
CROWD: THEIR PEOPLE!!!!!
BREAKER: Now.....eeeeeeeeeelllllllllladies and gentlemen!! Girls and boys!!! The BEST DAMN STABLE IN UWF HISTORY HAS REFORMED, SO MAKE SOME DAMN NOISE!!!!
(The crowd roars so loudly they can be heard throughout a four block radius.)
BREAKER: You all might we wondering....why would Breaker and Tony beat the hell out of each other if they were just going to team up? OVERVIEW: That's what I was wondering....
BREAKER: Well, let me tell you something, even in stables there is always a friendly rivalry between opponents. And tonight, the ONLY REASON we did it was to LURE out the ASSES who PUT the AOD name to SHAME!!!
(Breaker points to Ex, Lawrence Stanley, and Agent Steele lying face down and bloody in the ring, shirtless as the crowd pops for Breaker. 3B smiles.)
BREAKER: When I first came into the UWF, I was aimless. I was a man without a path to take, hell...Tony had no direction. Vinny Deducci had no direction. Chris Sweet had no direction. We four were struggling inside the UWF....and then we came together, as fate would have it. And we became stablemates......and friends. Without AOD, we would not have accomplished nearly as much as we did....the Alliance of Defiance jumpstarted our careers into superstardom...the stable represents some of our greatest times and moments in the UWF...from my shocking joining to the group at WRESTLING WITH ICONS with the help of resident Stoner Johnny Blaze.... to the infamous battle against Ellis's MutiCoporpation when they PAINTED the Ripper's Wrestling Academy HOT PINK, and it turned out to be FADE AWAY PAINT....(AOD and the crowd laughs)..to the time we all went to the REC DECK in Trights....to the time we threw golden toilet paper from the ring and descended down on that golden star...and, of course all those times we would spraypaint AOD in the middle of the ring for us all to see.........and when I destoryed it?
(Breaker pauses.) BREAKER: And, so I broke apart from this fine stable to jumpstart my solo career, and Tony headed AOD and feuded with me as two good for nothings tried numerous unsuccessful times to get into our brutal and breathtaking fued. And now..it does not matter anymore. The UWF is over, and you will NEVER see me in this place again...hell, if it were not for this LAST DANCE, I would not be here anymore anyway...and so we are reuniting ONE LAST TIME....for YOU THE FANS!!! (Crowd pops) BREAKER: And to tell the truth, I did not think much of that second reincarantion of AOD. Not much at all. We had to bring AOD back...we had to make it cool again...we had to bring the damn thing back to its roots!! AND NOW WE ARE TOGETHER FOREVER!! These three men ruined AOD...they changed it...and it was NOT for the better!! So let me leave a message on behalf of AOD to these ASSES who they could run side by side with us when they were, in fact miles away.....FUCK!!! YOU!! ITS THE FINAL HUMILIATION!!
(The crowd starts chanting AOD!! AOD!! AOD! as Breaker pulls out a BRANDING IRON out of nowhere....he waves it in the air and motions to EX, LAWRENCE STANLEY, and AGENT STEELE as Tony, Chris, and Vinny yank their pants down, revealing their very white and pale asses to everybody.. Breaker holds the branding iron above his head.)
BREAKER: The reasons this doesn't read AOD is because these IDIOTS are so STUPID they probably would think they were in it if AOD was branded on their ass!! It reads BBB!! THE NAME OF THE MAN WHO HAS COME BACK TO THIS FINE STABLE AND HELP MAKE IT RIGHT!! NOW, I WANT EVERYBODY IN THE CROWD TO JOIN ME, AND RAISE YOUR MIDDLE FINGERS TO THESE THREE NOBODIES IN THE RING AS I STAMP MY MARK OF DISAPPROVAL ON THEM!!
(The crowd pops and flicks off Ex, Stanley, and Agent Steele as Breaker holds the branding iron high in the air and stamps it down hard on the three asses.)
TTTTSSSSS!! TTTTSSSSS!! TTTTSSSSS!!
SHCHEEVONE: MY GOD!! AOD IS BACK AND IT IS BAD-ASS!! I NEVER REMEMBERED BRANDING IRONS AND THE BIRD IN THE OLD AOD!! THIS IS ABSOLUTELY AWESOME!! THE AOD NAME IS BACK TO WHERE IT SHOULD BE!! LISTEN TO THIS CROWD ROAR!! I CAN BARELY HEAR MYSELF SPEAK!! BREAKER STAMPED "BBB"ON EX, STANLEY, AND AGENT STEELE'S ASSES!! THAT'S PERMANENT!! JUST LIKE BREAKER DID TO GUNN BEFORE....WHAT'S THIS!?! BREAKER IS PASSING THE MIC TO TONY....
Tony C takes the mic from Breakers hand as they exchange an arrogant smirk. Tony climbs to the second turnbuckle and raises his arms in the symbolic "A" ofthe Alliance of Defiance. The crowd is absolutely deafening. Tony C pushes his hair out of his face and puts the mic to his mouth.
TONY C: A-o-D is BACK!!!!!!!!!! But back the RIGHT WAY!!!!
The crowd pops loudly
TONY C: Right now I can feel it Triple B. I can feel the ratings shooting up through the roof at the very sight of the reformation of the greatest stable to EVER emerge in this great fed. Together the four of us once ruled this organization and tonight we are going to make our presence felt once again!
OVERVIEW: I am in absolute awe right now Mitchell. This is a sight I thought I'd never see again.
SHCHEEVONE: That makes two of us!
TONY C: Where in the wrestling industry can find four men, fourcompetitors that can come close to the athletic prowless of Tony Canolli, BigBad Breaker, Chris Sweet and Vinny DeDucci?? We are the most lethal force and tonight, as the UWF closes its doors we will go out on top, right where the AoD belongs!
The crowd is on there feet
TONY C: And if anyone in that locker room has any gripe with that, I suggest you come talk to us about it, we aren't hard men to find. Just know,when you do find us, the four of us are gonna take your stinkin' asses and beat them FROM RINGPOST........
TONY & The Crowd: TO DAMNED RINGPOST!!!!!
The crowd erupts in a thunderous ovation, the very foundation of the arenaseems to be moving from the noise level within as Tony C hands the mic to ChrisSweet.
[Chris Sweet has the microphone in his hand and the crowd is chanting "Savior" but he raises his hand and then lowers it slowly quieting the crowd.]
Chris Sweet: I am.. "Greatness"..
[The crowd pops loudly and starts a chant of "Greatness" and Sweet brings the microphone back to his mouth and begins to speak.]
"Greatness" Chris Sweet: I am, was, and always will be Greatness. The day a year ago when I entered these doors to this evening when I walk out of them.I will be known simply as that. My life has changed here. It was a change for the better. But the best times, and the worst times, was the time when A-O-Fucking-D owned this federation. Breaker, Canolli, and Deducci, you guys are my friends, you are my foes, but you are one thing that nobody can takefrom you...
Canolli: What is that Sweet..
Chris Sweet: Well, you Sour son of a bitch, all three of you are LEGENDS...We were at the top of this federation and leaving tonight. We never fell from there. The trash has been kicked to the curb. The Damage has been done by the greatest three letters in this business, AoD. Now, I am going to the back,saying by to some friends, telling some others that they can kiss my ass. But before I could walk away from the business. I needed to make sure that Breaker, Sweet, Canolli, and Deducci ruled the show one more time. So Sweet Dreams and PRAY FOR MERCY because A-O-D is Forever and Ever. AMEN!
[Sweet raises his hands in the air as the crowd is electric and Sweet ripsoff his shirt revealing a Sweet and Sour shirt and him, Tony, Breaker, and Deducci exchange glares as Sweet stands on the turnbuckle. Sweet grins and tosses the mic to Vinny D.]
Chris tosses the mic to Vinny. Vinny leans over the top rope and leans back,and screams out.....
VINNY: THE ITALIAN KING OF HARDCORE IS BACK WHERE HE BELONGS!!!! The AoD is my home and its damned good to be back.
Crowd pops loudly
VINNY: You know, as I was sittin' back home in Howard Beach, drinkin' mybeer and watchin a little tube, my phone rang. When I picked up, I heard thevoice of my good friend Tony Canolli. Now, when he told me about tonight, Ithought it was a huge joke. But now, standing in front of all of you, im happy Imade this trip up here.
The crowd erupts in VIN-AY!!!! VIN-AY!!!!
VINNY: So tonight all better beware because the AoD is here and you canbet your ass Tony C, The Broken One, Sweetness himself and The Italian King ofHardcore are gonna raise HOLY F*CKIN' HELL AROUND HERE!!! PEACE.
(The crowd pops immensely as the four hold their arms in the air..Vinny D lifts out a can or spraypaint and spraypaints on top of the three lifeless bodies in the ring....)
A.O.D.
(The four raise their arms in defiance and walk out down the entrance ramp.) SHCHEEVONE: I can't believe what i just saw......the old AoD has reformed....the new AoDers are in shock, they came to help Canolli.....there will no doubt be reprecutions!
Man, i still remember BBB breaking away from Tony, Vinny, Sweet and the AoD to make his way to the world title.....
SHCHEEVONE: THOSE TWO HIT THE FLOOR HARD!!! The world title can split up even the best of friends....now PJ is left alone in the ring. He's calling for Jones to pass in the lifeless Breaker, this could be it, Breaker is damn near unconscious!
PJ HAS BREAKER....HE'S LOCKING ON THE HANDS OF GOD!!! STANLEY AND CANOLLI ARE OUTSIDE HURT BAD!!! Breaker is out.....
suddenly "Fuel" by Metallica blasts as flares go off in the runway
SHCHEEVONE: ITS EVEN GAMBOL!!! MY GOD ALMIGHTY HE'S HERE AND HE'S ONLY WEARING A CAST ON HIS ARM!!!......GAMBOL RUNNING DOWN TO RINGSIDE....HE's IN THE RING AS PJ IS HOOKING ON THE HANDS OF GOD!!!.....GAMBOL NAILED PJ WITH THAT CAST!!!! HE NAILED PJ WITH THAT BLOODY CAST....PJ IS OUT COLD....Gambol is looking for Canolli or Stanley to put ontop of the liveless PJ Brown, wait, BREAKER's ARM JUST SLUNG ONTOP OF PJ.......Evan doesn't see Breaker pinning PJ........1..............2...........3!!!!! NEW CHAMP NEW CHAMP NEW CHAMP NEW CHAMP!!!! Gambol is out of the fryingpan, but now Breakers the champ and he's right back into the fire....BIG BAD BREAKER IS THE NEW UWF WORLD CHAMP, GOOD LORD!!!
SHCHEEVONE: we're back, and look at that Lions Den....that is where Ike and Stal will battle it out in a matter of second....this will be a nuts match, and what does Ike have up his sleeve....he and Ex exchanged messages earlier and the "F" word came up.
OVERVIEW: We already saw the AoD reform, why not the Firm.
"Blood red Skies" by Judas Priest hits the PA as the crowd goes nuts.....pyros blast as the horse hoooves can be heard...then Stallion comes out to a HUGE pop.....suddenly from behind...
SHCHEEVONE: IKE JUST ATTACKED STAL FROM BEHIND! Ike is dirty and he's showing it off the bat.....Ike tosses Stal into the lions den Cage....there goes the bell as Ike rams Stals head hard off the cage....
Lions Den Match
OVERVIEW: That bastard Ike doesn't even want to get in the cage....he knows he's screwed if he enters that lions den with Stallion.
WESSIN: Whatever gets you through the night. mumbled asswhole.
SHCHEEVONE: Ike has Stal by the hair.....Ike runs Stals head against that rail....gashing him wide open....BIG AXE KICK BY IKE! HE JUST FLOORED STALLION!
OVERVIEW: These two guys have 4 world titles combined.....and they aren't even the main event.
SHCHEEVONE: Ike playing to the crowd, WATCH OUT, LOW BLOW!!! LOW BLOW!!! Stallion got Ike with some of his own medicine......Stal grabs Ike and pulls him to the Lions den......IKE IS IN!!! IKES IN THE LIONS DEN....now Stal is gonna tear him apart!....Stal grabs Ike....HEAD OFF THE CAGE!!! AND AGAIN!!! AND AGAIN!!! IKE IS TORN WIDE OPEN!!
OVERVIEW: blood everywhere.....my god, Stal is an animal, he should be caged.
SHCHEEVONE: Ike staggers up.....MY GOD! STAL LARIATED HIM OUT OF THOSE VELVET PANTS!
Stallion not wasting any time.....he grabs Ike and runs his head off the cage again.....GRABS HIM.....JUMPING DDT!! MY GOD!!!.............1..................2..................KICK OUT! IKE IS ON THE BRINK! Stallion is already signalling for the Thundering Hooves....this could be it....
SHCHEEVONE: IKE JUST PULLED OUT NUCKS! MY GOD! Ike leveled Stallion and now he's teeing off on Stal....blood is flying everywhere.....Ike puts the nucks back in his pants and grabs Stallion....Ike has the edge now thanks to his usual dirty tactics.
OVERVIEW: 4 months out of wrestling doesn't change much.
SHCHEEVONE: Ike pulls Stallion over to the pole.....MY GOD NO....BATTERING RAM INTO THE BLOODY POLE! STAL IS OUT COLD!....Ike is laughing as he drops the leg and pins Stal....this should be it.............1........................2................NO! HOW'D HE KICK OUT!!! Ike can't believe it.....he's in the refs face....ROLL UP!.................1......................2...................3! NO! NO! IKE GOT OUT!!......Stal and Ike get up.....
OVERVIEW: Look whats in Stal's hand!!!
WESSIN: Did he go into Ike's pants?
SHCHEEVONE: HE DID!!! THE NUCKS!!! BIG RIGHT HAND!!! AND ANOTHER!!! IKE DROPS LIKE A SACK OF POTATOS!
OVERVIEW: sweet potatos of corse.
SHCHEEVONE: Stallion pins Ike.........1.....................2..............3! ITS OVER, NO! NO! THE REF SAYS 2 and 749/750s!!! THAT WAS TOO CLOSE! Stallion is smelling blood.........he picks up IKE....CHOKE!!! OH NO!!! SPINNING CHOKESLAM!!!! THE CROWD IS GOIN NUTS!!! STAL JUST BLEW THE ROOF OF THIS PLACE AS HE JUST TOSSED IKE HARD TO THE GROUND!.....Now Stal is signalling for....REINBUSTER!!! REINBUSTER COMING UP!!! NO!! LOW BLOW!!! IKE LOW BLOWS STALLION!!!....DROP TOE HOLD....
OVERVIEW: RIGHT HEAD FIRST INTO THE CAGE!
WESSIN: you just can't beat Ike.....he is the greatest.
OVERVIEW: oh please, get your nose out of his ass.
SHCHEEVONE: enough you two, look whos just walked out!
the crowd pops big time
SHCHEEVONE: ITS EX!!! WHY IS HE HERE!?
OVERVIEW: Remember the "F" word was mensioned earlier.....his old mentor Ike is in trouble, and here's the usual cavalry. As always, Ike has it covered.
WESSIN: Funny, thats what your wife said.
SHCHEEVONE: Ex to the ring.....wait...HE'S GOT BOLT CUTTERS!!! BOLT CUTTERS!!! He's cutting the bolt!!! GOT IT!!! Ex just opened the door.....Ike is up and grabs Stallion.....blasts his head off the pole and drags him outside.....NOW WHAT!?
OVERVIEW: looks like....WOOOOOD!
WESSIN: YES!!! KILL HIM!!! KILL THAT LACROSS PLAYING HONKEY!
RIGGS: i thought he was a horse, not a donkey?
OVERVIEW: are you still here?
SHCHEEVONE: Ex just laid Stallion out on the table....and now....IKE IS SCALING THE LIONS DEN!!! WHAT THE HELL IS HE DOING!!!? IT COULDN'T BE!!!? EX IS HOLDING STALLION DOWN!!.......SOUTHSIDE SPLASH!!! SOUTHSIDE SPLASH!!! AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
SHCHEEVONE: EX PULLED STALLION OFF!? WHAT THE HELL!!!? EX PULLED STALLION OFF!!!?......IKE WENT THROUGH THE TABLE!
OVERVIEW: What the hell? What about the Firm?.....why did he do that?
SHCHEEVONE: Ike is staggering up......Stallion is stunned, he doesn't know what just happened....Ike is primed......LOOK OUT!!! THUNDERING HOOVES!!! THUNDERING HOOVES!!! NAILED HIM!
OVERVIEW: THROUGH THE SIDE OF THE LIONS DEN CAGE!!!! MY GOD!!!! STALLION JUST HOOVED HIM THREW THE BLOODY GODDAMN CAGE!!!
SHCHEEVONE:......here comes a pin................1...............2................3!!!! ITS OVER!!! ITS OVER!!! MY GOD!!?!?!
WESSIN: Ex is no longer my son.
OVERVIEW: you suck balls.
SHCHEEVONE: STALLION BEAT IKE!? BUT WHY DID EX DO IT!?
suddenly the lights shut off and the UWF tron lights up.....
the Renegade Revolution theme song blasts as Cykill and Tiberon walk out to a decent pop.....Ex join the three of them with a mic
EX:Ike, you thought i was gonna win you yet another match, well you thought wrong. The fact is Ike, i'm through being your whipping boy....I'm a world champ and i'm rolling with the Revolution ONE LAST TIME!
Ike, the Firm is tired and played out, but there isn't a day that goes by where i'm not asked when myself, Cykill, Tibs and Stal will re-unite for one last run.
Well the answer, old 'pal', is RIGHT NOW!
Ex hands the mic to Cykill
SHCHEEVONE: I can't believe this, the RR back together after almost a year apart? Tibs back again......this is too much!
TIBERON: One would say the band was back together, guppies but we all know how unoriginal that would be... so let this night shark say this..... Not only is the best face stable in UWF history back together, but the best stable PERIOD is back together!!! Did all you squids really think that we were finished? Well guess what. THINK AGAIN!
Tibs hands the mic to Cykill
CYKILL: Yah see, the Firm might have been former on money and power, and thats all well and good. The AoD might have been formed on respect and talent.....again, a terrific aproach. But the RR, we're formed on KICKIN ASS AND TAKIN NAMES! And when it all comes down to it, you can have all the talent, money, power, and respect in the damn world and it all mean shit all when you got a pair of R's tatooed on your forehead and a pair of feet tatooed on your ass!
the Revolution music blares again as Cykill, Tiberon, Ex and Stallion leave.....Stallion still looks puzzled. Ike gets up and picks up the mic that has been tossed away.
IKE: Hold up there kracker. Not so damn fast.
Now i've heard shit before, but that was at a whole different level. Frankly Ike didn't like it one bit.
So here's what i'm gonna do......i hear that band of punk ass, wannabee Icons, who would have never got past midcard status if Ike and the Firm hadn't have retired months before, the AoD, are kickin it once again.
the crowd pops
IKE: Well, how bout you four punks, waddle yo asses out here later. We'll throw the guido brothers, Slim Shady and their little buddy into the mix and Ike will bring 3 FORMER FIRM MEMBERS with him and we'll see just who owns who, got that?
EX: Sure do Ike, and in case you were wondering, the only thing the Firm ever owned was a bunch of unsold merchandise and a bad theme song.
Ex tosses down the mic as he and the RR walk out.....
SHCHEEVONE: Folks, that is a blockbuster....and i aint talkin Ray Faith. Ex and the RR re-form and now Ike has signed the 4 members of the AoD, the 4 members of the RR and 4 members of the Firm in a 3 way stables match!!!
RIGGS: Faith is my bro.
OVERVIEW: But WHO will be the other 3 Firm members.....i can't even think of 2 who might side with Ike!?
SHCHEEVONE: that 3 way stables match will be coming up next, and we still have Mr. Sex and Manson Combs and then the main event!!! Man, this is too much, almost worth ending the greatest fed of all time over......
Say, while we sit on our hands waiting Lets look at Lawrence Stanley's rise to the top as we continue to look at the world champs nights of fame....
OVERVIEW:Stanley beat Breaker fair and square now Breaker is getting revenge!!! BREAKER JUST HIP TOSSED THE REF OUT OF THE RING!! BREAKER IS CHARGING STANLEY......STOPPED!! STANLEY'S HAND JUST SHOT OUT AND IS CLUTCHING BREAKER'S THROAT!! CHOKESLAM ON THE THUMBTACKS!! and WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?!!?!!
(The crowd explodes into an incredible ovation.)
OVERVIEW: CRAZY RAGE JOHNNY BLAZE AND ROSA BELLA ARE HERE!! THEY ARE JUST WALKING DOWN THE ENTRANCE RAMP!! HOLY SHIT WHO WOULD HAVE THOUGHT WE WOULD SEE THEM AGAIN!! BUT SOMETHING IS DIFFRENT...they aren't happy! Or mad!! they are just..solemn and determined walking down the entrance ramp to the ring.....HOLY SHIT BLAZE AND ROSA ARE STOMPING BREAKER WITH STANLEY!! LISTEN TO THIS CROWD CHEER THEM ON!!! I DON'T BELIEVE THIS!! STANLEY, BLAZE, AND ROSA STOMPING ON BREAKER!!
(The crowd explodes into an massive pop.)
SHCHEEVONE:TONY CANOLLI! THE FLAMBOYANT ONE IS HERE!! HE HAS A BASEBALL BAT!!! HE IS WALKING DOWN THE ENTRANCE RAMP AND INTO THE RING!! WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?!! YESS!! YES!! TONY IS BEATING THE SHIT OUT OF BREAKER WITH A BASEBALL BAT!!! WHILE BLAZE, ROSA, AND LS STOMP THE BROKEN ONE!! HE IS ALMOST DEAD!!
(The crowd erupts into a massive mixed reaction.)
OVERVIEW: RAZOR SHARPE!! THE ALLSTAR IS HERE!! AND HE'S GOT A CHAIN!! HE IS WALKING DOWN THE ENTRANCE RAMP...
WESSIN: Thank God, Breaker needs SOME help here.....
SHCHEEVONE: YES!!! RAZ IS BEATING ON BREAKER WITH THAT CHAIN!!! WHY THE HELL ARE RAZOR SHARPE, TONY CANOLLI, JOHNNY BLAZE, LAWRENCE STANLEY, AND ROSA BELLA BEATING ON BREAKER FOR?!!
SHCHEEVONE: Wow, we already saw Stanley and JD have the world title split in two earlier tonight after they couldn't continue in one of the most amazing matches of all time.....we haven't seen either since, but i have a feeling Stanley and Lawson will be back for the main event.
OVERVIEW: Mitch, i have got word that the cameras spotted something going on backstage....lets cut there.
the camera cuts to the AoD lockeroom. Tony, Breaker, Vinny and Sweet are sitting with Robin, Blaze, and Lacky2K....Breaker looks pissed
BREAKER: I can't wait to get my hands on that piece of black power shit!
TONY: Doesn't it piss you off the guy is booking us in matches? I mean, he thinks he's the goddamn prez again.
VINNY: Does it matter? He's got booking power tonight, no wonder the guy is power trippin.
TONY: So what should we do? I mean Breaker has a match in 30 minutes for all the marbles. And my legs aren't workin too well right now.
BREAKER: You know what we're gonna do. We're gonna go out there and show LL Cool J and Ex's band of 2-bit hacks why the AoD is the greatest damn stable ever.
CHRIS: Okay, but i have a dinner date in about 25 minutes, can we make it quick. I'm taking out this nurse from the psycho ward i used to like.
She used to do up my hockey helmet.
the camera cuts backstage to Ike in his dressingroom
IKE: How fast can you get down here?......He's doing what?......Making a banana split!?
Well tell the little monkey i'll buy him all the damn banana splits he wants if you two get down here in 10 minutes.
HAHA! Thats my boy!
Ike hangs up smiling
SHCHEEVONE: WHO WAS IKE PHONING!? And what can we suspect from the AoD.....they didn't seem too happy about being booked in this match.
WESSIN: who cares if they're happy or not, listen to what Ike said at the top of the show, we're going back in time tonight and that means that the AoD are midcarders and they do what Ike says they should do.
OVERVIEW: Only in Ike's little world are Canolli, BBB, Sweet and Vinny D midcarders.
RIGGS: you guys want any pizza?
WESSIN: you got PIZZA!?
RIGGS: no, it was just a hypertheatercal question.
SHCHEEVONE: its hypothetical
RIGGS: yah, thats what i said hippoethical.
SHCHEEVONE: good lord.
The Revolution's theme blasts as Tiberon, Ex, Stallion and Cykill walk out....the crowd gives them a nice pop as they play to the crowd....Stallion still looks unexcited as he walks with his former mates to the ring
SHCHEEVONE: The RR back again, but whats up with Stal....we didn't here anything from him!? Was he ever part of the plan?
OVERVIEW: Well he was part of the stable.
the "Welcome to the Jungle" by GnR blasts as the Alliance of Defiance walks out to blazing pyros and a sizable pop...."A-O-D" chants can be heard as BBB rolls in the ring. Canolli and Vinny slap hands with the crowd and Sweet poses on the ropes
SHCHEEVONE: the fans are goin wild...the AOD reformed earlier, and we're talking the original AOD.....lets take a look at what went down earlier....
(Suddenly, the AoD theme blasts from the speakers as the crowd is shocked and turns around to see Ex Lawrence Stanley, and Agent Steele running down to the ring in the attire that the 2nd version of AOD wore.) SHCHEEVONE: What the hell is THIS?!! THE MEMBERS OF THE LAST INCARNATION OF AOD ARE HERE TO HELP TONY!! I SMELL A REFORMATION!!! BREAKER is going to get SCREWED and he deserves it!! OVERVIEW: EX, LAWRENCE STANLEY, and AGENT STEELE charge the ring...WHAT THE HELL?!! The ref just let go Tony, and he pulled out a LEAD PIPE!! Breaker's got that SHOVEL!! BREAKER and TONY are turning to face Ex, Stanley, and AGENT STEELE!!! SMACK!! CLANG!! SMACK!! SHCHEEVONE: WHAT IN GOD'S NAME IS GOING ON?!?! BREAKER AND TONY JUST DESTROYED EX, STANLEY, AND AGENT STEELE!! AND NOW THEY ARE RIPPING THE AOD SHIRTS OFF OF THEM!! WHAT IN THE---NOW THE LIGHTS ARE GOING OFF!!! IT'S COMPLETELY DARK!! I CAN'T SEE A DAMN THING!! WESSIN: Hold me, Mitch. BOOM!! (The lights come on with a huge blast of pyros as "Welcome To The Jungle" by Guns N Roses blasts from the speakers. Standing on the entrance ramp are "The Savior" Chris Sweet and Vinny Deducci with their arms in the old "AOD" symbol. The crowd roars in an absolutely deafening crowd pop that rocks the very foundation of the building. The two run down to the ring and slap hands and hug with Breaker and Tony Canolli.) SHCHEEVONE:MY GOD I WAS RIGHT, AOD REFORMED, BUT NOT IN THE WAY I EXPECTED AT ALL!! THE OLD AOD IS BACK STRONG WITH THE MEMBERS OF THE NEW INCARNATION LYING FACE DOWN AND FULL OF BLOOD IN THE RING!! WILL YOU LISTEN TO THIS CROWD!! I CAN BARELY HEAR MYSELF TALKING....THIS IS SOMETHING I WOULD HAVE NEVER EXPECTED TO SEE...BREAKER AND TONY SIDE BY SIDE!!!
IKE: Well, well, well. If it aint 8 little boys tryin to run with real mo fuckin men......its damn funny to see yal fools runnin around the back like chickens with their heads cut off cus yal just believed Ike runs the damn show.
Well i tolds yal i was takin yah back in time....no Gambol to fuck with. No Mac to push around....no Thad or Ellis to screw with. Yal are dealin with the most dangerous man in this sport and with the Firm at my back there aint no dizzzout that I own all yo asses!
Now then, i'd like to introduce the REAL most POWERFUL F'IN STABLE IN UWF HISTORY....7 World Titles......2 Presidents.....4 of the greatest superstars in UWF history = one bad mutha fuckin stable.....BALEEEEEEEDAT!
"Bawitaba" blasts as green pyros shoot off...Ike has a sneer smile on his face as he points back at the runway......first, a stoned and beaten up Fly-T walks out from backstage, he's still got a blunt in his hand, the solepole in the other as he slaps hands with Ike
SHCHEEVONE: ITS FLY-T!!! FLY-T AND IKE ARE TOGETHER AGAIN!!....BUT WHO ELSE!?!?!
"More Human than Human" by White Zombie rocks the PA as the crowd starts to boo hard! Ike smiles again as Manson Combs makes his way out....he poses to the crowd with a "TTT" shirt with a circle and a line threw it
OVERVIEW: there the bastard! Manson hit Shawn Smith with his limo earlier, those two are set to fight coming up next. But i sincearly doubt Shawn can fight!?
SHCHEEVONE: Manson has got to be wondering whats going on with that man we saw.....who was that??
OVERVIEW: no idea, but it creeped me out.
WESSIN: Guys i only count 5 word titles.
SHCHEEVONE: you can count!?
RIGGS: please, anybody can count to 5.......see watch. 1.....2.....uh....uh.....ah fuck it.
suddenly the pyros explody as "It aint my fault" by Mystical and Silkke its the PA, the crowd errupts as a little monkey walks out with a pimp hat and a cane.....
SHCHEEVONE: MY GOD!? DO YOU KNOW WHO THAT IS!?
WESSIN: bubbles?
RIGGS: i like monkeys.
OVERVIEW: ITS PIMP C!!! PIMP C!!! THAT MEANS THE 4th MAN IS.....
suddenly pyros explode as Jermaine Write walks out with a snake around his neck and two ladies on his arms......the Firm walk towards the ring to a huge heel pop as the crowd is astonished
SHCHEEVONE: THE ZOOMASTER!!! HE'S BACK!!! We haven't seen Jermaine Write since '99.......i can't believe it!
Stables Match (Ex, Tiberon, "The Show" Cykill and Stallion)
vs
The Alliance of Defiance ("The Urban Legend" Big Bad Breaker, "Mr. Flamboyance" Tony Canolli, "The Savior" Chris Sweet and Vinny DeDucci)
vs
The Firm (Isaac McBride, Fly-T, "The Big Hit" Manson Combs and "the Zoomaster" Jermaine Wright)
OVERVIEW: Manson is just letting them attack eachother...he doesn't care, none of the Firm does.
WESSIN: Firm rules.
SHCHEEVONE: Canolli hits Cykill with some chops.....a pick up....HUGE POWER SLAM! Heres the pin.........1......easy kick out! Cykill rolls out of the ring.....Vinny is going right after him....watch out Cykill!!!
SHCHEEVONE: TIBERON LEPT OFF AND DROP KICKED THE CHAIR INTO VINNY'S FACE! Tiberon working on Vinny outside......CANOLLI JUST GRABBED CYKILL AND IS PULLING HIM IN OVER THE TOP ROPE!.....Now here comes Combs with a big ax handle......Combs waited and he has Canolli.....a pick up....HANGING SUPLEX!!! WHAT STRENGTH!!......Combs isn't wasting any time....he's looking to strap on the Elegantly Wasted.....NO! CYKILL WITH A BULLDOG FROM BEHIND!!! Heres' the tag.....HERE COMES EX!!! EX IS IN!!!.....CLOTHESLINE ON MANSON!!.....IKE JUMPS IN AND GETS ONE TOO!!! AND FLY-T!!!....Ex is on fire......
OVERVIEW: WATCH OUT! J-dub has Ex by the hair....SLAMS HIS HEAD OFF THE TURNBUCKLE!!!
SHCHEEVONE: THIS IS TURNING INTO AN ALL OUT WAR!...the ref can't maintain...Ex just bounced into Manny's clutches.....BIG SPINNING BELLY TO BELLY!....here's the pin.........1.........2....BROKE UP BY CYKILL!
OVERVIEW: Cykill is forced back to the corner.
SHCHEEVONE: now Manny tags Fly-T in....Fly-T grabs Ex....BIG SNAP SUPLEX....float over........1............2..........NO! EX KICKED OUT!......Fly-T pulls him up....DROP TOE HOLD INTO THE ROPE BY EX.....he's trying to make the tag....HERE COMES Tony, i guess he;s the legal man.....Tony C grabs Ex....HE TRIES TO TAG STAL!? STAL DREW BACK!?....what the hell!? Cykill is yelling at Stallion. Tony has Ex.....picks him up.....JUMPING TORNADO DDT!!! NAILED IT!!! WHAT A MOVE........1.............2..........3!NO!NO!!! Ex kicked out.....now Ex is over tp tag Stal again...crawling....Stallion drew back again.....EX TAGGED STAL! THE REF IS TELLING STAL TO GET IN......Stallion looks like he's not part of the team....WAIT!!!! STALL JUST CLOCKED EX!!!! STALLION JUST NAILED EX!!! HE GRABS EX AND THROWS HIM IN THE RING.......what the hell!? STALLION AINT RR THATS FOR SURE!
OVERVIEW: this is amazing! Fly-T and Tony are just watching......THUNDERING HOOOOOVES!!!
SHCHEEVONE: NAILED HIM!....Fly-T pins Ex...........1................2..............3!!! GOT HIM!! Ex is the first out!!.....Now Stallion jumps in......Canolli tags BBB and they go after Fly-T, who ducks....DOUBLE DDT BY CANOLLI AND BBB! Fly-T is down.....CANOLLI grabs FLY-T......FLY-T IS GOING FOR A RIDE!!!!! CHOKESLAM!!! CHOKESLAM!!!!.....
OVERVIEW: LOOK AT THE OUTSIDE....CYKILL JUST TOSSED STALLION OVER THE ROPES!!!they are going at it.....CYKILL HAS STALLION OVER AT THE ANNOUNCERS TABLE! BODY SLAM!!! WHAT ON EARTH IS HE DOING!?!?!?!
WESSIN: OH GOD.....go to the spanish one!
RIGGS: wrestlers sweat alot.
SHCHEEVONE: MY GOD LOOOOOOK OUT!!!
SHCHEEVONE: DE-RAILER!!!! DE-RAILER!!! THATS HIS OLD MOVE!!! THROUGH THE GODDAMN TABLE......Cykill tosses Stallion back in......BBB covers Stal....his old buddy...........1.............2............3!!! CYKILL MAKES HIS OWN TEAMATE LOOSE!!! THE RR IS DOWN TO 2 MEN!
WESSIN: hehe 2 men.
RIGGS: hehe 2 men......wait, i don't get it.
SHCHEEVONE: what a surprise.......Write just tagged in and went right after BBB....Breaker spins.....he missed....BIG REVERSE ATOMIC DROP!.....Breaker into the corner....PIMP C JUST JUMPED UP.....HE'S GOT THAT CANE......MY GOD!?
OVERVIEW: BBB GOT LEVELED.......J-dub with the pin.........BROKEN UP! Chris Sweet lept in and broke it up.....
SHCHEEVONE: WAIT! TIBERON GRABS HIM.....BIG BELLY-TO-BACK POWERBOMB!!!!......Write leeps up....BIG CLOTHESLINE BY TIBS.....he's on fire....BBB rolls out of the ring.....JW is up....WATCH OUT!, kick to the gut.....COULD BE....THE BITE!!! THE BITE!!!..........a pin.........1.............2............3!!! WRIGHT IS OUT! He had BBB but Tibs stopped it....Breaker jumps back in the ring.....he rushes after Tiberon and nails him with a spear!...
OVERVIEW: this is outragious.
SHCHEEVONE: BBB tags in Chris Sweet.....he and Sweet double on Tiberon. Ike is just waiting in the wings......Tiberon is up as Sweet goes at him with a clothesline....Tibs ducked and tagged Cykill!!! CYKILL IS IN!!......he goes after Sweet and smokes him with a shoulder block....Cykill goes after Ike, NAILS IKE WITH A CLOTHESLINE!!! IKE GOES OVER THE ROPES.....Cykill spins around.....CHRIS SWEET WITH A BIG BOOT!....that knocked Cykill down....Sweet signalling for his move......this could be big! Sweet picks up Cykill......SALVATION!!! SALVATION!!! HE NAILED IT.....here's the count..........1..............2..............3!! NO! NO! CYKILL'S FOOT WAS ON THE ROPES!....
Sweet can't believe it.....meanwhile Manson Combs was just tagged in....Combs is up behind Sweet.....Combs is smiling, he's got the Real Deal rarin to go.....Combs taps Sweet on the shoulder.....HE'S GOT HIM IN THE REAL DEAL....WAIT!!! CYKILL WITH THE ROLL UP!!!.....CYKILL ROLLED MANSON UP!!!............1.............2.............3!!! MANSON IS OUT!!! the FIRM IS DOWN TO 2!!! MANSON CAN'T BELIEVE IT!!!
OVERVIEW: serves him right for what he did earlier to Shawn Smith....that stinking bastard!
SHCHEEVONE: Cykill bounces up.....SWEET GRABS HIM........SALVATION AGAIN!!! HE HIT IT AGAIN!!! THATS GOTTA BE IT!.............1..............2.............NO! TIBS BROKE IT UP!!!.....VINNY ATTACKS TIBS.....Tiberon broke up the count. Cykill is out cold. Sweet just tagged in BBB....Breaker is hovering over Cykill....could be Broken Elbows time......he's setting up....
OVERVIEW: SOLE POLE!!! SOLE POLE!!!
WESSIN: YEEEEEESSSS!
SHCHEEVONE: IKE NAILED BBB WITH IT!......FLY-T GRABS BBB......T-BONE!!! T-BONE!!! NAILED IT...........1..............2...........3!! CYKILL CUT OFF CANOLLI!!! BBB IS OUT!!! IKE NAILED HIM WITH THAT SOLE POLE AND T PINNED HIM!!
OVERVIEW: the AoD are down to 3, and who would have though BBB would have been their first out!?
SHCHEEVONE: Fly-T is celebrating with Ike.....Cykill just tagged Tiberon.....FLY-T DOESN'T SEE TIBS!?......BITE!!! BITE!!! BITE!!! TIBS NAILED IT!!................MY GOD!!!...............1...............2............3!!! WHAT A TURN OF EVENTS!
OVERVIEW: IKE IS THE LAST OF THE FIRM! Tibs and Cykill are rippin it up!! Stal screwed over the RR in the begginning but Tibs and Cykill are tryin to pull it out. the Aod still is in controll though.
SHCHEEVONE: Tiberon goes after Vinny who jumps in.....Vinny ducks the clothesline.....kick to the gut.....AXE KICK BY VINNY! OUCH WHAT A SHOT!......What now?
OVERVIEW: The Italien King of Hardcore is calling for Canolli to get a table.........whats goin on!?
SHCHEEVONE: Tibs just got laid out flat by a right hand....Vinny looks like he wants wood.....and here it comes! Vinny sets up the table.....he's putting Tibs up.....ON THE SECOND ROPE!?.....What is Canolli doing!?.....Tibs is up in an electic chair drop....Canolli is on the top.....what the hell could this be.......WAIT!! HERE COMES SWEET!!! HE'S GOING TO THE TOP TOO!!?!?!?!.
OVERVIEW: Mitch, imagine the LOD with two Animals
SHCHEEVONE: DOUBLE DOOMSDAY DEVICE THROUGH A GODDAMN TABLE.....TIBS IS OUT!!! HERE'S THE PIN............1.............2............3! TIBS IS GONE!! Tibs fought his heart out but he's gone......the AoD look to be in controll.....Ike is the lone man on the other side and he's hurt!
the crowd pops
OVERVIEW: STANLEY AND STEELE!!! STANLEY AND STEELE!!!
SHCHEEVONE: WHAT THE HELL!? STANLEY AND STEELE ARE HERE!!! Stanley and Steele part of the new AoD were beaten up earlier....i can't believe Stanley's still walking after that and the JD match.....They just grabbed Sweet and Canolli....RIGHTS AND LEFTS!!! UN SQUAD AGAINST SWEET AND SOUR!!! Cykill is dead, Ike and Vinny are battling off in the corner.....WAIT!!! THE REF JUST COUNTED OUT CANOLLI!!? WHAT THE HELL!!!.....CANOLLI WAS THE LEGAL MAN!!! THE REF COUNTED HIM OUT!!!....he couldn't care less......hes in a major battle...Stanley just grabbed Sweet.......FACEDOWN!!! FACEDOWN!!! STANLEY TOSSES SWEET IN!!..........Cykill pins him............1.............2.............3!!! SWEET IS OUT!!! MOZZERELLA STICK BY TONY!!! HE SMOKED STANLEY INTO THE CROWD!!! WHAT A MOVE!!!
OVERVIEW: OH OH!.....STEELE FROM BEHIND!
SHCHEEVONE: STEELE GRABS CANOLLI!!!
SHCHEEVONE: SOLDIER SLAM!!! THROUGH A TABLE!!!.......Vinny, Ike and Cykill are the three remaining as Canolli got counted out.
OVERVIEW: And Sweet just went facedown.
WESSIN: hehe facedown.
RIGGS: hehe facedown......uh....i don't get that one either.
SHCHEEVONE: CYKILL just charged Ike....Ike ducked......IKE NAILED CYKILL OVER THE ROPES......Ike is taunting Cykill.....what a son of a bitch........MY GOD LOOK BEHIND IKE.....Vinny HAS THE SOLE POLE.....
OVERVIEW: VINNY DECKED HIM!!! Heres a pin..................1...................2..................3!! IKE IS OUT!!! THE FIRM IS OUT!!! I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!!?.......Vinny is all alone in the ring. Steele just got up on the apron....he's yelling at Vinny.....Vinny yelling back.
OVERVIEW: Cykill is back in the ring.
SHCHEEVONE: Sure is....but Vinny is focused on Steele, he just grabbed Steele....HANGMAN OVER THE TOP ROPE BY STEELE....Vinny bounces back.....CYKILL GRABBED HIM!!! DE-RAILER!!! DE-RAILER!!! HE NAILED IT!!! CYKILL NAILED IT!!!!...............1....................2.................3!!! MY GOD!? THE RR WINS IT!!! STANLEY AND STEELE GET REVENGE!!! THIS IS AMAZING!!! CYKILL AND THE RR WIN IT!!! Stal's plan went askew.....so did Ike's......the only plan that went threw is the RR's plan to kick some ass and thats what they did! MY GOD Ex, and Tibs run out!!! Their goin wild!!! Stanley and Steele walk out with the trio.....
the RR theme blares as the Revolution celebrate......
SHCHEEVONE: Folks i'm breathless, watch Ex's title win just months ago while i catch my breath.
>Everyone starts to look at the UWFTRON as the words Proposition S.T.A.G.G flash numerous times and then 1:00, ...59....58...57, and then it turns off.
SHCHEEVONE:WHAT WAS THAT??
WESSIN:I dont know. But whatever it was distracted Gent.
SHCHEEVONE:EX IS WALKING UPTO GENT!! HE GRABS HIM BY THE HAIR AND REVERSE DDT!!! EX IS SLOW TO GET UP!!! HE DRAGS GENT OVER TO THE CORNER!! NOW HE CLIMBS TO THE TOP TURNBUCKLE!!! HE JUMPS OFF AND FROG SPLASH!! EX HIT GENT WITH A FROG SPLASH BUT HE ROLLS OFF!!! NOW EX GETS UP AND LIFTS GENT TO HIS FEET!! EX BACKS AWAY AND THEN CHARGES AT GENT AND SPEAR!!!! EX JUST SPEARED LAWRENCE STANLEY!! BOTH MEN ARE SLOW TO GET UP!!! EX GETS UP AND THEN LIFTS LAWRENCE STANLEY UP!! EX SETS HIM UP FOR A POWERBOMB!! REVERSED INTO A BACK BODY DROP!! LAWRENCE THEN PICKS UP EX AND THROWS HIM TO THE ROPES!! BOTH MEN RUNNING TO EACH OTHER...BIG BOOT TO THE FACE BY LAWRENCE STANLEY!! EX IS DOWN!! WAIT. NOT AGAIN.
UWFTRON comes back on and Proposition S.T.A.G.G flashes again then then the words Screw Thad And Gain Gold!! Flash.
SHCHEEVONE:WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT MEAN?? LAWRENCE STANLEY TURNS AROUND AND LOOKS AT TOMMY GUNN!! GUNN SMILES AND THEN IDOLIZER!! IDOLIZER!! WHAT THE HELL?? TOMMY GUNN JUST HIT STANLEY WITH HIS FINISHER!! HE PULLS EX ONTOP OF STANLEY AND COUNTS ...........1....................2................3!!! ITS OVER!! I CAN’T BELIVE IT!!! I DON BELIEVE IT!! EX IS THE NEW UWF FUCKIN WORLD CHAMPION. AND ALL THANKS TO TOMMY GUNN!! GUNN JUST SCREWED OVER THAD!!! I DONT BELIEVE IT!!!
OVERVIEW: It seems like just yesterday that Ex's long journey to the top was complete.
WESSIN: my son makes me proud.
RIGGS: my son is in 3rd grade.
OVERVIEW: YOU HAVE A SON!?
RIGGS: son, friend.....same thing.
SHCHEEVONE: I wonder who the smart one is when you and your 'friend' hang out
OVERVIEW: Mitch, i'm getting word something is happening backstage.....
the camera cuts backstage to Ike, pissed off, walking to his dressing room....there is a note on the door
IKE: Goddamn muther fucking......what the hell is this?
Ike reads the note his jaw drops
IKE: No....it can't be.....he's....he's not back!?....He can't be back!....
Fuck me.......another Champion in the match.
god dammit! Why's he back?
ike slams the door OVERVIEW: What the hell was that all about!?.....Who is Ike talking about!?....
SHCHEEVONE: it sounds like we just had somebody added to the Champion of Champions match.....but who could it be? Canolli? Wright!?.....maybe even JOHN SMITH!?!?
OVERVIEW: I can't f'in wait!
SHCHEEVONE: We have our next match, and this one is....or was supposed to be a great match up. As you may have seen earlier, Shawn Smith was struck by Manson’s limo. We do know that Smith is in the hospital, and will not compete in the last show of the UWF. A sick and twisted part of Manson is what we have seen to much.
WESSIN: Like I said before. He is a very busy man. Money is money, and when business calls he is out of here. The match would have been a squash anyway.
Extreme Cage Match
”More Human Than Human” by White Zombie slams out through the arena. The lights dim and flashing lights of various colors fill the area. The crowd gives a huge heel pop as Manson Combs appears at the entrance, with his usual ring attire. White and black wrestling pants with silver and grey designs. Wynona is at his side as the men in the crowd focus accurately and hard. Combs raises his arms slowly as the fans boo like mad. The two walk to the ring, with a mic in Manson’s hand. Again he taunts and flexes in the ring. SHCHEEVONE: And here is the man with the darkest heart in the UWF!
WESSIN: Only the greatest champion there ever was!
SHCHEEVONE: I guess everyone has there own views. Lets hear what he has to say. I think we already know what he’s going to brag about.
MANSON: What you saw was history in the making. What you saw was the Triple Threat and the NGH being slammed by a limo. It was only necessary for the survival of my reputation. I mean, if I were to fight a nice clean match tonight, it would hurt the world to see with there own eyes what I am capable of. And thats just the nice side of me. There are many reasons why I did it. One, is to get back at you fans, the crowd, and the morons watching at home.
The crowd boo’s at this.
MANSON: Oh believe me, what you put me through was to much for my liking. When I was selling out my injured spine, liying down in a hospital, I received many “get well” cards and gifts. For crist sake. For one thing, your gifts sucked. Fruit cakes, cup cakes, a computer, stereo system, free trips to around the world....I had to tell Wynona to send all this sh!t to the dump.
The crowd boo’s even more. Wynona just smiles.
SHCHEEVONE: Now that is just sick.
MANSON: Lets move on to the next reason. I felt I was getting to soft. From what I heard was that people were walking to the arena with hopes of seeing the Main Man as a great guy. A man that would clap at a fancy move, or shake hands with the fans, OR EVEN GIVE AUTOGRAGHS! I had to put a stop to it. I can see I accomplished THAT mission quite easily.
The crowd starts a chant of “Jack-ass”. Manson stops talking and just glares into the stands. He smiles at Wynona.
WESSIN: Hey, thats a new one.
MANSON: Their opinion does NOT matter. The fans mean nothing to me. So what they say, just bounces off my hard ass, back in there holes.
Wynona laughs, but the fans boo.
MANSON: Another reason. The most important one of them all. The Triple Threat was a legendary group of the elite wrestlers. But to be honest, I can’t stand them! When I joined, I felt like a pile of horse sh!t had just made it’s way into my jaw. So I took it upon my self to rid them from this planet. MY planet. I ruined John Smith’s career by jackknifing his carcass down a flight of steps. I strategically planned out the murder of Al Jameson. Which Ex was accused of, and taking credit for. Good job there. Maybe next time I can give you a plan on how to get laid.
SHCHEEVONE: Now he’s taking a shot at Ex.
MANSON: With Jameson rotting in the graveyard, I had a sure shot at the UWF Championship. It was all falling together. But it all got f#$^ed.
The fans pop at the past incidences, Manson’s negative story.
MANSON: So I figured I need to kill TTT for good. So who was the only man left that was one of the main members? Shawn Smith. But he is somewhere....lying on the concrete....probably dead as we speak. What I have done, is something that no one has ever done. Not even the LOU could do. Not even the Firm could do. I ALONE KILLED OFF THE TRIPLE THREAT.
The fans boo louder than before and bits of trash are thrown in the ring.
WESSIN: OH it’s true. It’s sooo true.
MANSON: Since there will be no match, I thought I would entertain you all with something else. So roll down the limosine. Lets have some fun.
The same black limo pulls up to the ring. In the front there is a dent from the hit and run. The fans gawk and wonder just what is going on. The drivers seat door opens amd Big Joe steps out. He walks around to the passenger door and opens it. Slutty and Sleezy step out, with terrified looks on there faces. Big Joe grabs the both of them and forces them into the ring. They stagger, and stay close as Manson looks at them in mockery.
SHCHEEVONE: How...how the hell did Joe get those two. And why? What is the point of this?
WESSIN: Alright! Whores. We just might see some porn! Or at least a strip dance duo....get Wynona in there and triple the fun!
MANSON: As I said, I don’t want to leave the arena without entertaining the UWF. I can do many things with you two. I could get a three way started in this very ring right now. Or I could just slaughter the two of you. Ya see, you two are in with Mr. Smith. Therefore you are involved with TTT in some way. That means there will be some serious consequences!
Wynona hands Manson a small club.
MANSON: You can get out of this. All you two have to do is raise my hand in victory, and I just might let you go. It’s only fair. Shawn Smith is a no show so therefore I am the rightful winner of the match. Here, raise my hand.
The crowd looks to be confused as to what is going on. Manson holds out his hand to Slutty. She hesitates, then slaps Manson in the face. The fans cheer.
SHCHEEVONE: She slapped Combs! She slapped Combs! This is going to get ugly!
Manson spins around in anger. He shoves Slutty to the ground, hard. Then decks Sleezy for no reason.
SHCHEEVONE: Manson hit Sleezy! That peice of sh!t!
MANSON: You should never F@#$ with me like that again!
Wynona rolls Sleezy out of the ring. Manson grabs Slutty and shakes her a few times, shouting at her the same time. He then sets her up for the Real Deal.
SHCHEEVONE: NO! Manson is going Real Deal Slutty! He could break her to peices!
Suddenly the lights turn off. The fans buzz and wonder what is happening. A blue light lightens up the arena. Manson releases Slutty, who then flee’s the ring. Manson looks around in confusion.
SHCHEEVONE: What the....whats going on? Lights are off, with a blue light shining out.
"Film Star" by Suede shoots out through the arena. The UWF tron blazes with...
>
SHCHEEVONE: IT CAN’T BE! IT CAN’T BE! HE’S DEAD! DAMIT, I CAN HARDLY HEAR MYSELF!
WESSIN: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Moments pass as the biggest pop in UWF history comes from the thousands and thousands of fans. the arena is loud as the music still plays out. Bright pyros explode from the entrance way. As the bright light dies down, and the smoke clears, The Icon is standing at the entrance. The fans give a huge pop, even bigger then before, as they look in disbelief. Manson drops the mic in shock. He backs off a bit, not knowing what to do.
SHCHEEVONE: IT’S HIM! IT’S HIM! THE ICON!! AL JAMESON IS BACK! HOW? WE THOUGHT HE WAS DEAD! LISTEN TO THE OVATION FROM THE CROWD!
Jameson is still standing at the top of the ramp as Manson starts shouting something at him. The Icon pulls out a mic and holds up his hand, the crowd responds by falling into silance. The Icon takes the mic and lifts it to his lips.
ICON: ....
(At this crowd starts in unison)
ICON: Manny Fresh, you do the un-thinkable, you do the un-beleaveable and you do the un-expected. You tried to commit verhicular hommacide on....the Icon.
(At this the crowd start to boo Manson who doesn't care, he stays focused at the Icon.
ICON: For six months the Icon rested in a hospital while the world thought he was dead, the Icon lay there full of tubes and drugs just to keep the Iconic heart pumping and while the Icon rested, he dreamed....he dreamed of a night JUST LIKE THIS! Because Manson, in the history of TTT Rex Stone, Mr. Sex, Aero...out of all of us.....you were the one that could not prove that he was better in the ring!
(The crowd pops once again)
ICON: ....and now the Icon was waiting in the wings tonight, because ever since the Icon came out of the hospital....you've been hiding Manny...you've been un-traceable. But tonight, the Icon is going to make sure you don't have the chance to go into hiding again!
SHCHEEVONE: There goes Jameson to the ring, after Combs! Manson....he’s taunting him in! There they go! Jameson throws a right, Manson returns but it’s blocked, and another blocked! Jameson is punching away! The fans on there feet!
Manson falls out of the ring, as Jameson quickly follows pursuit.
SHCHEEVONE: Both men are outside of the ring. Manson at 6’7" and Jameson at 6’6". Jameson grabs Manson by the arm, and whips against the gaurd rail! Manson is in pain and in shock. Jameson grabs him again, and whips head first into the railing again! Manson is getting hammered on! Wait, whats Jameson saying? He wants the ref to ring the bell! He wants this to be a match, and take Shawn Smith’s place. The ref doesn’t hesitate and the bell rings. Jameson after Manson, but Manson returns with an elbow to the midsection. He grabs Al’s head and bounces it off the spanish announcers table! Manson trying to take control. He takes Jameson....and....
SHCHEEVONE: He whipped Jameson into the ring steps! The steps are loose, and Manson takes advantage. He’s lifting up the steps and nails Jameson on the back! Jameson is flat out on the ground. Manson drops the ring steps and takes Jameson by the hair. Manson throws him over the gaurd rail! Al’s knees hit the rail first! That must of hurt! Manson quickly follows, but Jameson reverses Manson’s boot, and huge clothesline! The Icon floored him. He grabs Combs, and tosses him back over the railing. The two of them are on the ramp now. Jameson with a series of stomps and the fans love this. The Icon is still stomping away like mad! He picks Manson up, and a quick suplex by Jameson. Manson lands hard on the steel surface! He archs his back in pain. Jameson quickly up. Where’s he going? He’s heading back to the ring area. He’s getting a steel chair!
Jameson runs back up the ramp as Manson stumbles to his feet. The fans roar in anticiaption of the hit coming up.
SHCHEEVONE: Here comes Al with the chair! But no! Manson with kick to the mid section, and a quick upper cut that sends Jameson stumbling back! Manson’s taking the chair and....
SHCHEEVONE: Manson hit Jameson with the chair right in the back of the head! But Jameson is only down on his knees. Now Manson is...heading in our direction.
WESSIN: Now, just leave me out of this. I had NOTHING to do with it.
SHCHEEVONE: He’s not coming here, he’s clearing off the spanish annoucers table. Al back to his feet. But Manson runs back with lariat! The Icon is down. Manson takes Jameson up, and he’s trying to place him on the table!
SHCHEEVONE: OH! JAMESON NAILED MANSON WITH A TV MONITOR FROM THE TABLE! Manson is out and down. He felt that one! The monitor has shattered. The Icon is rolling Manson on the announcers table. Al is stepping up, and he’s setting Combs up for something! He’s gonna spike pile drive Manson through the table! HE’S GOT HIM!
SHCHEEVONE: MANSON JUST GOT PILE DRIVED THROUGH THE SPANISH ANNOUNCERS TABLE! My god! Manson is out, and The Icon is up. The fans, listen to them. There loving this.
WESSIN: Loving this? The best champ just got put through a table!
SHCHEEVONE: Exactly. Al is going for the cover....1...........2...........3NO! Manson managed to kick out! How did he do it? Jameson can’t believe it! Wait...he’s pointing to our announcers table! NO! NOT HERE!
Jameson grabs Manson who is barely walking, and puts him up on the table. The fans go nuts as they are about to see Combs go through again.
SHCHEEVONE: Jameson is setting Manson up again! I think he’s going for a power bomb this time! He’s lifting him...WAIT! Manson reversed! And Al falls hard on the... OUR table! JUST GO AWAY! Now what?
Manson jumps off the announcers table, and enters the ring. The ref tries to stop him but Manson just shoves him aside. Manson climbs the turn buckle...
SHCHEEVONE: Damn it! This is crazy! The ref has no control. The cage has NOT been lowered yet! And Combs is gonna...SHIT!
Manson jumps off the turnbuckles, towards Al’s body on the table.
SHCHEEVONE: MY GOD! MANSON JUST JUMPED FROM THE TURNBUCKLE THROUGH OUR TABLE, RIGHT ON JAMESON WITH AN ELBOW! I can hardly here my self!
WESSIN: We have no table. Someone in the back GET A DAMN TABLE FOR US!
SHCHEEVONE: Manson is hurt too. He’s stumbles from the wreckage. The Icon is not moving. Here comes Wynona. She wants to know if Manson is alright. But Manson ignores her, and goes straight after Jameson, who is just getting up. Manson going for him, but AL trips him up with a scissor sweep take down. Manson’s head bounced off concrete. Wait, Wynona comes behind Jameson, and scratches his back? Ouch. Al swings around. And he’s going after her. Wynona is backing off. Look out from behind! Manson with the ring anouncers bell!
SHCHEEVONE: Manson nailed Jameson from behind, with the bell. The Icon getting back up.What the? Manson just grabbed the camera mans video camera! The screen goes all fuzzy as Manson pulls it from the camera man. The scene quickly switches to a different camera angle.
SHCHEEVONE: Manson....watch out Icon!
SHCHEEVONE: ICON DUCKED! MANSON SHATTERED THE CAMERA ON THE RING POST!
WESSIN: DAMN! Just barely missed his skull!
SHCHEEVONE: Jameson charges, but Manson throws him into the ring post! Manson...he’s looking around for something
Manson looks around as the fans start a Jack ass chant. Wynona then points to the black limosine that is still parked near the ring. Manson smiles and picks The Icon up by the hair. He drags him to the limo.
SHCHEEVONE: What is Manson doing? He has something planned with the limo. He’s rolling Jameson on top of the front hood. He nails away with some elbows to the sturnum of Jameson for insurance. Manson now jumps on the limo. He stands Jameson up...he’s gonna DDT him through the windsheild! WAIT! Al reversed! lifts Manson up and....
SHCHEEVONE: Jamesom with a spinebuster bomb on Manson! The windshield has shattered! Manson almost went through it! Jameson picks Manson up...and takes him to the top of the limo! He’s got him....
SHCHEEVONE: Jameson front powerslammed Manson on top of the limo. Look at the dent! The limo caved in!
WESSIN: I think Manson is dead. The damn hunk of trash named Jameson is smashing Manny’s limo.
SHCHEEVONE: The fans are loving this! They love seeing Manson get a taste of his own medicine. Manson is starting to move now. The Icon drags him up, but no! Manson with a cheap low blow. Al just rolled off the limo in pain. Manson off the limo now. He opens one of the doors to the limo, and
SHCHEEVONE: Manson whacked Jameson’s head with the door. Al dented it. Wait, where’s Manson going?
Manson walks, dazed, to the trunk of the stretched limosine. He opens it, and reaches in to grab something. A quick moment later he slams the trunk shut. The fans look in hoarer as Manson has an Automatic Shotgun in his hands.
SHCHEEVONE: I CAN’T BELIEVE WHAT I’M SEEING! MANSON HAS AN AUTO SHOTGUN! HE CAN’T USE THAT!
WESSIN: YES! SHOOT HIM! This is Manson’s rules now.
SHCHEEVONE: Manson with a low kick to the gut of Jameson, who is on his hands and knees. Wynona is smiling. She’s loving this. The Icon standing to his feet, Manson with the but end of the gun...
SHCHEEVONE: He missed. Manson tried to bust Jameson’s skull open with the but end of the shot gun, but Al moved, and Manson hit the window! Al with lefts and rights, kicks to the mid section. But Manson with a shot to the midsection using the end of the gun. Manson is loading up the shot gun. NO WAY! Al jumps for cover!
SHCHEEVONE: AL MOVED JUST IN TIME. HE JUMPED FOR COVER IN THE LIMO. The door has been blown off. Now Manson jumps back on the limo roof. I can’t believe he’s trying to kill Jameson. Manson is shooting away! Someone call the cops!
Manson starts pumping lead through the roof of the limo.
The gun clicks as Manson runs out of shells. The roof of the limo is covered with eight holes where Manson was shooting, and smoke fills the air. No sounds or movement come from inside the limo as Manson smiles. He stands relaxed on the limo and raises the shot gun in the air laughing.
SHCHEEVONE: I think....I think AL Jameson could be dead! For sure this time! I can’t believe what I saw with my own eye’s. The fans saw it. Manson is going to prison for this if convicted.
The fans are silent and shocked at what happened, as Manson is loading up more shells. Security comes down to try and calm Manson down. He points the gun at them as if about to fire. But suddenly Jameson pops through the shattered sun roof, and shoves Manson off the roof. The gun falls free to the ground. The fans give a huge pop.
SHCHEEVONE: The gun is gone, and Jameson is okay! We thought is was over...Jay? Jay were the hell are you?
Wessin appears from under the new table.
WESSIN: Um....just thought....I would try and take a peek under Wynona’s skirt....yeah.....thats all.
SHCHEEVONE: What ever. Back to the match. Manson is stunned. Al is on top of the limo. He looks to be bleeding a bit from the shoulder. I think a shell grazed him! He jumps with a flying clothesline! That took Manson off his feet. The fans are crazy once again. Al drags Manson to his feet, and slamms him against the limo! Manson is stumbling, and Jameson rams Manson back against the limo! That sound like it hurt! Manson falls to the ground. Jameson, now opening another door of the limo. He’s...he’s placing Manson’s head between the door. Here we go...
The Icon stops as Manson stops moving. One side of his head seems to be bleeding.
SHCHEEVONE: Jameson just obliderated Combs. Jameson drags Manson to his feet, picks him up and a snake eyes on the edge of the limo. Manson is holding his face in pain. Here comes Wynona again. She delivers an axe handle smash on the back of Jameson. Jameson spins and GRABS HER BY THE ARM! HE’S GOT HER THIS TIME. He’s...he’s taking her away. He wants her out of this match. Wynona struggles to get loose. The fans are laughing. He’s taking through the drive way leaving the arena. Wynona just spit in Al’s face. Jameson is ticked.
Manson gets up and enters the passenger seat of the limo. He revs up the engine, and reverses full speed toward Jameson.
SHCHEEVONE: HEY! MANSON IS IN THE LIMO! HE’S GOING TO TRY AND CRUSH JAMESON AGAINST THE WALL! JAMESON SEE’S HIM! NOOOO!
Manson floors it toward the Icon. AL see’s the charging limo, and does a jumping roll. He bounces off the remaining windshield, and into the air. Hitting the ground he rolls safely, and stands back up. The limo then slams into the wall.
The fans give a massive pop at the incident. Wynona steps back, with her hands on her head not believing what happened. The limo’s rear is completely smashed in, with the wall cracked and crumbling. Manson then tries to move forward, but the limo seems to be stuck.
SHCHEEVONE: MY GOD! WHAT A MOVE BY JAMESON. WHAT A F$%^ING MANEUAVER TO DODGE THAT LIMO! Manson is trying again, but he can’t get free.
WESSIN: You know what? This is supposed to be a match. Matches usuall happen IN the ring.
SHCHEEVONE: You have a point. But the fans are loving this! Manson stepping out of the limo, and Jameson charging for him. Manson going for an elbow smash, but Jameson ducked, and a HUGE clothesline from hell! Manson back up, but another huge clotheslibne from Icon. Jameson grabbing Manson and taking him toward the ring. Jameson whips Manson into the corner of the ring. Jameson now looking under the ring. He’s pulling out SOME TABLES! HE’S GOT FOUR TABLES OUT. THE FANS WANT TO SEE COMBS GO THROUGH ANOTHER TABLE.
Jameson sets up two tables beside each other. He then tries to roll Manson on top of them. The fans pop as they see what is about to happen.
SHCHEEVONE: More tables. Wait, Manson just splashed something in Jameson’s face. He took something from the crowd and used it. It must....MANSON JUST SMASHED THE JUG INTO JAMESON’S CRANIUM! Glass is everywhere! Al is cut, he is bleeding above the left eye! Manson has him, a quick scoop slam on the concrete. Manson drags Jameson to his feet. Rolls him on the table! Manson is going to the top turn buckle again! Manson climbing up! Can’t be serious. He’s trying to play to the crowd.
WESSIN: DON’T WASTE TIME!
SHCHEEVONE: Here he goes!
SHCHEEVONE: JAMESON MOVED JUST IN TIME! MANSON TRIED TO DRIVE BOTH KNEE’S THOUGH HIM BUT INSTEAD DROVE THEM THROUGH WOOD! Manson is in pain, holding both knee’s. The Icon picks Manson up and toss’s him in the ring. You got your wish, Jay, they are finally in the ring. AL lays a few boots to Combs. The Icon drags Combs to his feet. he sets up for what looks to be a suplex...brain buster instead! Jameson goes for the cover! 1........2........kickout by Manson! After all the beating, he kicked out. Jameson picks him back up, and throws him to the corner. Jameson runs in, but Manson got the boot up! Manson runs in with a forarm smash! Jameson is dazed. Manson picks Icon up, and a quick fallaway slam! Manson now trying to gain control of the match. Now he’s choking Jameson. A cheap choke hold. The ref is now back in it and trying to get Combs off.
WESSIN: Isn’t this an extreme match?
SHCHEEVONE: You could say that. Manson releases the choke and goes right after the ref. He’s in his face. Manson turns his attention back to Jameson, who is just getting up. Manson goes for hard right hand but Jameson ducked! He hooks Manson’s arms and tries for a back slide! But Manson won’t budge! Manson has the advantage! Now Jameson does! And Manson kicks out his leg underneath Jameson. He falls down in pain. Manson grabs him back up. Jameson with elbow strikes to the gut of Combs! The fans are starting to chant Jameson’s name. Jameson hits the ropes, and back but NOO! Manson right back with a sidewalk slam! He goes for the cover! 1......2.......and a kick out by Jameson! Manson’s now pissed. He grabs Jameson’s legs, this could be it. We might see the Elegantly Wasted. No, Manson with a fist to the groin. That cheap shot! Manson brings Jameson to his feet. He throws him to the rope, Manson comes in but Jameson ducked! They hit the other side and connect....Jameson with a cross body smash! Manson stumbles back up, but Jameson delivers a DDT! Manson stays down this time! Jameson crawls to his feet. He’s heading up stairs!
Jameson jumps to the top rope and quickly dives off.
SHCHEEVONE: OH, diving head butt by Al Jameson. Manson is out of it. AL brings Manson to his feet, Manson swings wildly but Jameson ducked and delivers a release german suplex! The Fans want Jameson to end it! But will he? Or does he want to ripp Manson apart! Jameson delivers some elbow drops, and now locks on an arm lock. He’s got it applied. Will Manson tap! Wait, Wynona is climbing up to the apron! She’s trying to distract the ref. Jameson see’s her!
Jameson releases Combs and makes a grab for Wynona. But she jumps off just in time.
SHCHEEVONE: Wynona got away. Look out from behind! Manson with a blow from behind. Manson has got him again and full nelson slam! Thanks to Wynona, Manson has struck back. Now Manson is leaving the ring. He’s grabbing some cables. He can’t do that. He....he just ripped it out of the socket! He’s back in the ring, and wrapping it around Jameson’s throat! He’s trying to choke the life out of him! This is sick. Hold on, he stopped it. I think he’e got something else planned. He’s going to try and hang him over the ropes. Manson throws Jameson, but Jameson grabbed the cable. He’s yanks Manson and a huge belly to back suplex! What move by Jameson! Manson stumbles back up but Jameson punches him over the ropes! The cable is untied now. Manson out of the ring again, back to his feet. HERE COMES AL.....DIVING BODY PRESS! HE RAN AND LEAPED OVER THE ROPES ON TO COMBS! Both men are down. The ref checks on them. Jameson is up first. He grabs Manson, and slams his head on the concrete. He picks Manson up.....but Manson shoved Jameson into the steal railing head first! Manson grabs Jameson and he’s heading back to the limo again! Manson slams Al’s head off the front hood! He’s tries again...no, Jameson reversed and Manson’s skull hits the window! I think he almost shattered it! Jameson throws Manson to the gaurd rail... it...it looks like the limo is on fire...
A sudden flash of light and loud bang rocks the arena.The camera pans to where the limosine was. The Limo suddenly exploded. Smoke, debris, and fire erupt. The force pushes Manson and Jameson to the ground.
SHCHEEVONE: WHAT THE F$%K? THE LIMOSINE JUST EXPLODED! MY GOD. THAT JUST SHOOK THE ARENA! Jameson and Manson are out. The explosion was just a few meters from them! My god! Get the EMT’s! They are not moving! Both men appear to be badly hurt! The shratnal from the limo must of caught them! Here are the EMT’s now. Manson is being loaded on a stratcher. So is Jameson. Both of there bodies seem to be 5 - 10% burnt! The medics load them on stretchers. They both have a few peices of shratnal in them. limo is still on fire as the madics try their best to work on them.
SHCHEEVONE Wait! Jameson is getting back up! He’s wants Manson!
WESSIN: That was, was Manson’s limo. He should be pissed off!
SHCHEEVONE: Will you shut up? Jameson wants to finish this once and for all!
Jameson grabs Manson’s stretcher and pulls it back to the ring. The fans give a huge pop as they know the match is going to continue.
SHCHEEVONE: Jameson dumps Manson off the stretcher. They are going to continue. The medics are confused. Jameson grabs Manson, but Manson with a rake to the eyes! And a front kneck breaker. Manson tosses Jameson in the ring. Now Manson is getting a chair ready. He’s in the ring. Both men are up. Manson with a steel chair. Jameson with nothing. They are just eyeing each other.
The fans, erupting over the explosion, start chanting Jack ass. Manson wheels around telling them to shove it.
SHCHEEVONE: The fans are getting on Manson’s side here. What is Jameson doing? He’s telling Manson to come hit him. He’s turning around with his arms out. I don’t believe this. I don’t think Manson does either. It’s doesn’t matter what he thinks, because he is winding up the steel chair. HE CHARGES!
Manson charges Jameson with the steel chair, but Jameson quickly turns around, ducks the chair shot, and delivers a dragon suplex.
SHCHEEVONE: WHAT A COUNTER BY JAMESON. HE TRICKED COMBS INTO IT! Jameson now grabbing the chair! Manson is stumbling up, turns around...
Jameson taps the chair on the mat then winds up with a chair shot as the fans go nuts.
SHCHEEVONE: MANSON GOT LAYED OUT BY THAT CHAIR SHOT!
WESSIN: And look who’s coming back in. Manson’s tag partner, Wynona.
SHCHEEVONE: Wynona is in the ring! She’s crazy! She’s confronting Jameson. Look at her, she’s in his face! She better watch it, The Icon is going to lose it.
Wynona tries to seduce Jameson, but only recieves the finger. Wynona starts to push Jameson. He tries to ignore her, but then she slaps him.
SHCHEEVONE: Wynona slapped Jameson! A dumb move! Jameson is furious!
Jameson suddenly kicks Wynona in the gut then gives her the Hell Raiser.
SHCHEEVONE: HELL RAISER! HELL RAISER! JAMESON HELL RAISERED WYNONA! SHE’S OUT COLD! THE FANS LOVE IT. Manson is up! He can’t believe what he see’s. He’s pissed off! He charges but Jameson catches him with samoan drop! The cover 1.........2.........NO! Manson kicked out of it!
Jameson suddenly leaves the ring to get two of the four tables left. He tosses them in the ring, and begins setting one up against a corner.
SHCHEEVONE: Jameson setting up the table. He pulls Manson up, and he’s going to....NO, Manson reversed!
SHCHEEVONE: Manson reversed it. He sent Jameson into the table! He grabs Jameson and puts his throat on the rope. He’s choking him! Manson’s leaning in with his knee. Manson runs back and jumps on Jameson with his leg. Jameson is trying to breathe. Now Manson is leaving the ring. He’s looking under the ring. He’s got a bunch of weapons! A crow bar, lead pipe, bat, fire extiguisher, barb wire, chain, sledge hammer, you name it, all in a steel trash can.
WESSIN: I just got word backstage that the officials didn’t want this match to happen. Thats why the cage hasn’t come down yet.
SHCHEEVONE: I think you spoke to soon, because here it comes.
The fans pop as the steel cage begins to lower down. Manson see’s this and drags Jameson to the edge of the apron.
SHCHEEVONE: Manson is putting Jamesons arm on the edge of the ring. Someone pay attention! Who the hell is lowering the cage! It’s almost down! NO! The ref stopped it! He pulled Manson away just in time! The ref is giving Manson hell. The cage is now over the ring.
Manson calmly walks over to the can of weapons. He dumps them all over the ring. He then picks up the crow bar.
SHCHEEVONE: Manson has the crow bar and HE JUST NAILED THE REF! THE REF IS OUT. Manson picks up and hits him again across the skull! We have no ref in this match. The cage is closed. Jameson back up, Manson goes for the attack! Jameson moves and a neck breaker by Al! Jameson picks Combs up, and pushs him against the turn buckle! He’s stomping a mud hole. Jameson going crazy on Combs! Jameson, now going for a weapon...he’s got the bat! And hit’s Combs in the gut with it! Another on the back! Now what’s he doing? He’s grabbing the Barb wire and wrapping it around the bat! Thats lethal! Manson up, dizzy. Jameson whinds up and HE NAILED COMBS! MANSON IS BLEEDING BADLY! Manson trying to get to his feet again! How can these men take this? Another swing by Jameson, but Manson ducked and reverse DDT! Manson got lucky on that one. But great move nonetheless. Manson goes for the cover, but there’s no referee! Manson picks Jameson up and rams his head off the turn buckle. He tries again....Jameson blocked it, and does the same! Rams Combs’ head off the turn buckle, again
The crowd counts along
1.....2.......3......
2nd turnbuckle
4......5........6......
3rd turnbuckle
7.......8........9......
last one on the mat
10
SHCHEEVONE: And there’s the tenth one. Manson stumbles against the turnbuckle, and here comes Jameson with a splash! Manson hangs to the ropes for support. Jameson grabs Manson by the head, and whips him to the cage! Manson falls to the mat, holding his back! Manson trying to get back to his feet. Jameson waiting for Combs to get back up. Kicks to the gut, he’s going for the Hell Raisor! NO! Manson reversed it into northern lights suplex! Manson falls to his knees.
WESSIN: I don’t think niether of them want to bother with a pin fall. They just want to kill each other!
SHCHEEVONE: Manson back up. He takes Jameson and rams his head of the steel cage! I heard that one! He does it again! Jameson is bleeding even more now! Now Manson grating Jameson skull against the cage! Damn it! Look at the blood on the cage! It’s dripping! Manson whips Jameson to the ropes, and a press slam! What power by Combs! Manson picks AL up amd tries again, Jameson doesn’t budge! Manson tries a lariat but The Icon ducks and a quick russian legsweep!
Wynona suddenly reappears. She stands outside the cage mouthing off to Jameson.
SHCHEEVONE: There is Wynona. She has just recovered from that Hell Raisor. I think Jameson is going to go after her. Wynona is opening the door! But look out from behind! Here comes Combs! Jameson see’s him, locks up and a sambo suplex! What move! Jameson quickly going for top rope move. He’s up on the top rope! listen to the fans, he jumps and NIALS A LEG DROP! Manson is out cold. Jameson....he’s picking up the chair!
Jameson picks up the chair, but throws it down. Probably due to the fact that it’s bent out of shape.
SHCHEEVONE: Jameson is heading for the cage exit. I think he wants a new chair to wrap around Manson’s skull. WAIT! Here comes Wynona and
SHCHEEVONE: Wynona slammed the door on Jameson’s head! He spins around in a daze, Manson is up, grabs him...REAL DEAL! REAL DEAL! IT HAS TO BE OVER HERE! Manson trying to awaken the ref, who is still out. Manson goes for the cover! The ref counts 1..........2...........3NOOO! NO! JAMESON KICKED OUT! HE KICKED OUT OF THE REAL DEAL! LISTEN TO THE CROWD! WYNONA CAN’T BELIEVE IT!
WESSIN: NO WAY! NO ONE HAS EVER DONE THAT! NO ONE HAS EVER KICKED OUT THE REAL DEAL!
SHCHEEVONE: Manson is in shock! He is in disbelief! Manson is gonna try another one! BUT NO! Jameson reverses! He tosses Manson to the ropes and tries for clotheline but Manson ducked! Here they come again AND A HUGE SPEAR BY JAMESON! Manson tries to stand, and Jameson from behind....drop kick to the back of Manson! Manson still standing. Jameson jumps to the second turn buckle! BULL DOG FROM THE SECOND BUCKLE! Manson is down for sure! Jameson is now looking for something. Manson is getting up slowly. Jameson with the trash can! And he puts over Manson. Manson can’t see a thing. The crowd is laughing. Manson still stumbling, he can’t get it off. Jameson now picking up the lead pipe...
Manson then falls to the ground, with the can rolling around. It stops and Manson manages to pull the can off.
SHCHEEVONE: Manson is dizzy. He can’t figure it out what happened. Here comes Jameson. boots Combs in the midsection. Picks him up and DOMINATOR ON THE TRASH CAN!
WESSIN: Manson’s ribbs must be cracked!
SHCHEEVONE: Jameson is pointing to the bat with the barb wire. He’s going for it, but no! Manson tackled him to the turnbuckle! Manson looks as though he’s had enough! He’s driving his knee into Jameson. Now Manson tries for it, but Al spins him back around and throws him back in the turn buckle! He jumps up on the second buckle and is throwing punch’s to the skull of Manson. The fans count the punches...wait! Manson picking Jameson up by the legs! He’s walking away with him! Jameson still punching away! Manson raises him up! Look out for barb wire! SIDE WALK SLAM ON THE BARB WIRE! JAMESON’S BACK IS CUT UP AND BLEEDING! Manson is up...and he’s heading for the cage exit. Wynona opens the door, and she’s questioning him. Manson’s out....and climbing the cage? He’s heading to the top of the cell!
Manson reaches the top of the cell. He yells something to Wynona, who nodds. She reaches under the ring, and takes out a fender made electric guitar. She throws it up, as Manson barely catchs it. Jameson stands to his feet, and realizes Manson is on top of the cell.
SHCHEEVONE: Manson is taunting Jameson. He wants him up there! The fans want Jameson up there. Jameson is going up! He’s heading for the top of the cell!
Jameson reaches the top of the cell as Manson winds up the electric guitar.
SHCHEEVONE: Manson swings but misses! Jameson with rights to the head Manson! Manson trying to fight back! But Jameson blocks them all! OH! Manson with low kick to the crotch of Jameson. Manson raises the guitar!
SHCHEEVONE: He cracked it on Jameson’s back, and it’s still in one peice! Jameson still trying to get back up. Manson aiming for his skull! A SWING AND ANOTHER MISS! Jameson ducked, and SUPER KICK! A SUPER KICK SENDS MANSON DOWN!
WESSIN: OUCH! Manson must be knocked out! I swear Jameson’s kick can go through a brick wall.
SHCHEEVONE: No Doubt. Jameson picking Manson up, he has his head between his legs! HE SIGNALING FOR A JACK KNIFE!
The fans pop louder as Jameson lifts Manson up, then releases Combs hard on the steal cell. The quarter he lands on suddenly gives away and Manson goes through the cell and hits the ring very hard.
SHCHEEVONE: MY GOD! MANSON WENT THROUGH THE TOP OF THE CELL! ONE QUATER IS MISSING! MANSON S NOT MOVING!
Jameson stares down at Combs’ motionless body. He then leaps from the top of the cell with a body splash.
SHCHEEVONE: OH MERCY! JAMESON TRIED A SPLASH FROM THE TOP OF THE CELL, BUT MANSON MOVED! HOW DID COMBS FIND THE STRENGHT
WESSIN: Does this remind you of anything?
SHCHEEVONE: What? Anyhow, both men are down. The ref is counting to ten. Manson is up...he’s up first! And....he’s trying to pick Jameson’s legs up. I think he’s going for the Elegantly Wasted! But NO! Jameson kicked him away. Manson hits the ropes and bounces back...and missed an elbow drop. Jameson is back up, but barely! Jameson, kicks Manson low, and HE’S GOING FOR THE HELL RAISOR! ARMS HOOKED....NO....NO...Manson reversed it! He grabbed Jameson’s legs and tripped him! AND HE’S CROSSING THE LEGS! THIS COULD BE IT! THE ELEGANTLY WASTED! Manson trying to turn Jameson over! HE’S GOT HIM! HE’S LOCKED IT ON! JAMESON IS IN PAIN! THE STRESS ON THE KNEE’S AND BACK! HE’S TRYING TO FIGHT IT!
WESSIN: YES! This one has to be in the books!
SHCHEEVONE: Jameson is still locked and has not tapped! Manson is trying to apply more pressure. The ref checking on Al! He’s fighting it! He’s pulling himself to the ropes! This is almost hopeless! He’s moving! AND LIFTING MANSON UP! HE’S PULLING HIMSELF TO THE ROPES! LISTEN TO THE FANS! THERE CHANTING JAMESON’S NAME! Jameson is almost there! HE’S GONNA REACH IT! JUST A LITTLE MORE.....SHIT NO! MANSON PULLS HIM BACK! BACK IN THE MIDDLE OF THE RING! LOOKS LIKE HE’S GOING TO TAP! HOW MUCH MORE CAN HE TAKE!
Jameson then starts turning over, trying to reverse the finisher.
SHCHEEVONE: Wait second! Jameson is trying to reverse it! He’s trying to turn Manson over with his lower body! Manson trying to fight it! HE’S....HE’S GOT MANSON OVER! JAMESON LOCKING MANSON IN A MOVE OF HIS OWN! LION TAMER! HE’S LOCKED MANSON IN A LION TAMER! HOW DID HE REVERSE THE ELEGANTLY WASTED! LOOK AT WYNONA! SHE CAN’T BELIEVE IT! MANSON IS NOW IN PAIN! HE’S TRYING TO REACH THE ROPES! HE’S ALMOST....HE’S GOT THEM! HE REACHED THE ROPES!
WESSIN: I can’t BELIEVE THIS!
SHCHEEVONE: The ref is trying to get Jameson off. He won’t let go! After Manson tried to kill him! He’s only trying the same!
WESSIN: DQ HIM!
SHCHEEVONE: Finally he lets go! Jameson is now having some harsh words with the ref. Hold on...Wynona is getting something from a bag. It’s a stun gun! SHE’S REACHING IN!
SHCHEEVONE: Jameson just got fried! Mean while Combs is grabbing that electric guitar again! LOOK OUT!
SHCHEEVONE: TO LATE! The electric guitar shattered over Jameson’s head! Jameson falls like ton bricks!
WESSIN: Haha. I think The Icon is smoking a little.
SHCHEEVONE: Thats all those two can do, is damn well cheat!
Manson then points up to the rafters.
SHCHEEVONE: Manson’s pointing to the top. What for....
The entire ring and cell slowly start to rise to the ceiling. The fans pop as they know the match is far from over. The ref tries to stop Manson from doing it, but Manson shoves him away. The ref gives up, and flees the ring. He jumps out the door before it’s to high.
SHCHEEVONE: The ring and cell are rising! What the hell is going on? Thats what Manson wants? the ref just fled. He wants no part in this.
WESSIN: OH GOD! Don’t you get it, Shcheeves? This match is turning into a Pure Carnage match!
SHCHEEVONE: SH!T! SOMEONE STOP THIS! THIS WILL ONLY LEAD TO ONE THING! THESE TWO WILL KILL EACH OTHER UP THERE!
WESSIN: Thats what Manson wants! This was meant for Shawn Smith, but you can guess what happened.
SHCHEEVONE: They are beaten enough! END IT!
The ring and cell stop at 25 meters high in mid air. From the top of the four corners of the cell, fire erupts looking like four large torches. Meanwhile Manson is choking the life out of Jameson with the guitar strings. The jumbo tron suddenly goes blank and the numbers 20:00 start counting down. the fans roar with excitement as they know what will most likely happen.
SHCHEEVONE: And there’s the time limit, twenty minutes and counting down. This is out of hand! Out of control! Back in the ring. Manson is choking Jameson with the guitar strings! I don’t know how long he was doing it for, but Jameson’s face is turning blue! I think he’s trying to fight it! He’s getting up! Manson applying more pressure but it has no affect! Jameson to his feet! Lift Manson up and BACK DROP! Manson’s head hit the canvass pretty hard there. Jameson catching his breath. Manson back up also! The Icon with a kick, Manson grabs his foot! ENZAGURI by Jameson. Jameson grabbing something from in the ring. The shovel! Here comes Manson!
SHCHEEVONE: He cranked Manson with the shovel! Manson down but still awake!
SHCHEEVONE: The Icon broke the shovel handle over the Big Hit’s back. Manson tries to get back up. He’s on his hands and knees. Here comes Jameson boucing off the ropes SCISSOR KICK ON THE BACK OF THE HEAD! Manson is down and out this time. Jameson ain’t done yet! He whipps Manson to the turn buckle. He runs in with a clothes line! The Icon is on fire! eigtheen minutes left on the timer. Jameson makes another charge, but Manson moved! Jameson’s head hits the turn buckle! Manson grabs a stunned Jameson and throws him to the ropes...tilt-a-wirl back breaker! Jameson felt that one. Manson off the ropes and a knee drop to the face of Jameson. Manson walking to one of the turnbuckles....and he’s ripping off the foam?
WESSIN: He’s taking off the soft stuff? GOOD!
SHCHEEVONE: Not just that one, but he’s taking off all four top buckles! He grabs Jameson, and whips him hard into the STEEL turn buckle! Jameson hits the mat hard. He opened the cuts on his back even more....the blood is all over the ring....just look at the two. They’re thrashed! Now Manson taking the dented chair. He has Jameson lined up....swings down...
SHCHEEVONE: JAMESON MOVED! He moved and the chair rebounded from the ropes and caught Manson in the cranium! Manson dazed by the surprise shot. Jameson picks up a crow bar...
SHCHEEVONE: Jameson hit the chair with the crow bar, which then nailed Combs again. Manson falls back on the turnbuckle. Jameson winding up again!
SHCHEEVONE: Manson moved just in time! Jameson hit the steel corner and sparks flew! Jameson runs at Manson, but Combs catches him with a powerslam! Manson is dizzy getting up. Both men have lost a lot of blood. Manson is going to the top corner. He’s up! But Here comes Jameson who hits the ropes! Manson lands hard!
WESSIN: OUCH! That has to hurt! metal against matel! I think Manson’s balls of steel are dented!
SHCHEEVONE: Jameson climbs up with Manson still sitting, feeling the pain. Jameson is setting him up for something big......SUPERPLEX! SUPERPLKEX ON TO THE BROKEN TABLE! THE ENTIRE CELL IS SWAYING!
WESSIN: They should have cleaned all the junk out first.
SHCHEEVONE: Too late now. Both men are slowly moving. 14:15 left on the timer! Jameson gets up first. Manson is up. Jameson goes for a swing, but Manson blocked it and choke slam! I heard that one from way down here! Manson now trying to get the upper hand. Manson taking Jameson up....looks like he’s going for a pile driver, no....he pancaked him on the trash can! The trash can is now officially flat! Manson is now taunting the crowd, who boo him in return. Manson picking Jameson who can barley stand. Jameson breaks up the hold! and starts punching away! Manson returns with some of his own! Jameson back with more...no! Manson parried it, and hits back! Manson spins around and a vicious back fist! Icon spins around to the mat. Did you see the blood fly from Jameson’s jaw! I think he KO’ed him! Manson picking Jameson back up. Throws him to the ropes-NO! Jameson pulls Manson back! Double underhook suplex! What a counter by Jameson. He’s still dazed. Manson comes right back but Jameson lifts him over his shoulders and rack pancake! Another great counter! Jameson climbs the top corner! Manson back up...and drop kick from the top! That one sent Manson flying! Jameson on his feet. He’s grabbing a peice of the broken table.
WESSIN: Why not just use the new table? No one has touched it yet.
SHCHEEVONE: Good, don’t give them any idea’s. Eleven minutes are left! He hooks one leg of Manson...and a fisherman DDT on the hard wood!
Jameson jumps back up, and gets the untouched fourth table ready. He sets up near a top corner. He then grabs Manson and rolls him on the table.
SHCHEEVONE: We are down to eight minutes! Jameson has Manson on the table! He’s going to drive him through it using his own body! He’s climbing up! And Manson is back and off the table! He’s got Jameson and throws him off! BUT THE TABLE DIDN’T BREAK! JAMESON BOUNCED OFF IT! It looks like Manson is a little surprised too. Manson picks up Jameson and whipps him hard into the corner! He hit chest first! He bounces back and a jumping knee hit by Manson sends Jameson to the mat. I think the turnbuckle is broken. The ropes are falling off!
WESSIN: You’re right. One side of the ropes have just fallen to the ground....no thanks to Al Jameson!
SHCHEEVONE: Manson grabs Jameson, and slams his head off the table! Blood just smeared on the table! Both men are soaked. Manson, throws Jameson to the other ropes, Manson jumps for a flipping drop kick but Jameson hangs on to the ropes! Manson falls but jumps back up. Jameson advances, and Manson tries again! Jameson grabbed both legs! Manson begging not to do it! Jameson falls back, and there goes Manson! spring board Snake eyes on the ropes! He bouncse back holding his throat, and quick diving DDT by Jameson! What move! I’ve never seen that one before! Manson stumbling back up and Jameson with an atomic drop! He’s on fire! Manson bowing in pain! Jameson grabs Manson and tosses him to the ropes! Manson reverses and Jameson goes flying! Here comes Manson going for huge kick! NO! Jameson ducked! He hits the other ropes and a jumping tackle on Manson! He’s punching away on Manson’s head! The fans are going nuts! Jameson brings Manson back to his feet. He whipped him right on the cage! He through manson hard to the cage! The ropes on that side could have stopped that! Manson still on his feet. Jameson runs in. Manson grabbs him! He’s got him set up for a REAL DEAL! BUT NO! JAMESON SLAMMED HIM DOWN FORWARD! He reversed Manson’s Real Deal!
WESSIN: That was a reverse Real Deal!
SHCHEEVONE: Now Jameson, making an attempt to throw Combs back to the cage, but Manson reversed and applies a sleeper hold! He’s got it locked on, and Jameson is falling to his knees! Manson squeezing hard on his throat! He’s cutting off the blood to Jameson’s skull. Jameson trying a come back! The fans are getting louder! Jameson with Elbows to Manson! He throws Manson to the ropes, comes back, but Manson reapplies the sleeper hold! It’s locked on again! And Sleeper neck breaker by Manson! Nice move. Manson setting up the chair, and a peice of the broken table. He’s got Jameson from behind and a PUMP HANDLE SLAM! Right on the chair and broken table! Jameson is not moving! Manson...he’s got a new weapon. He’s grabbing a chain.
SHCHEEVONE: He just whipped Jameson on the ribs with the chain! That must of stung! Fifteen minutes have past! Manson is now wrapping the chain around his fists! Jameson is up! MANSON SMOKED JAMESON! Jameson is out and even more blood is flowing from his skull! Manson mounts on top of him, and he’s punching away! He has that chain around his fists...
WESSIN: And using it to his advantage!
SHCHEEVONE: Thats a cheap fighters way out. Manson is mocking him. His hand is covered with Al’s own blood! He’s laughing! He’s loving this! Despite his injuries, burns, he is loving it!
Manson raises his hand as the fans show their displeasure by booing him to hell. Manson sticks his finger through the cage at the fans. Manson ignores them and gloats even more. The fans suddenly pop. Manson looks in confusion.
SHCHEEVONE: JAMESON IS BACK UP AND BEHIND COMBS! HE’S GETTING READY FOR SOMETHING! MANSON TURNS AROUND!
SHCHEEVONE: JAMESON SPEARED MANSON INTO THE OPEN CAGE! HE WENT FULL FORCE INTO IT!
WESSIN: SH!T, LOOK AT THE DENT THEY PUT IN IT!
SHCHEEVONE: Manson drops to the ground! Jameson falls with him! Jameson dented one side of the cage using Combs! The entire cage is swaying in mid air! What energy and will power by Jameson! Both men are down! Jameson gets back up on his feet.
Jameson picks Manson up, grabs him by the head and starts ramming it into the cage.
SHCHEEVONE: Jameson just slammed Manson’s head three times into the cage. Now the blood is REALLY starting to oozz out. Manson’s hair is soaked in his own blood! Jameson takes Manson again but Manson him locks his legs up! Jameson hits the steel corner. Manson grabs his head and rakes his eyes along the ropes! That must burn! Manson with a back body toss, sending Jameson to the ground. Manson now getting the chair. He’s putting Jameson’s hand in it! Now he’s stomping on it! He’s trying to snap Al’s wrist! Just sick. Manson, now laying the boots to Jameson’s back. Manson...he see’s the table. There is still one more table left, and still set up. Manson grabs Jameson and push’s him into the corner. Manson with some hard chops to the chest of the Icon. Now Manson is shouting in Jameson’s face. There goes the boot into the throat of Al. He’s choaking him again! Manson brings him back up. He’s lifting Jameson up on the top corner! Wait! He’s setting him up! HE’S GOING FOR THE 666 FIRESLAM!
SHCHEEVONE: HE DID IT! FIRESLAM THROUGH THE TABLE! SPLINTERS ARE EVRYWHERE!
WESSIN: Manson looks hurt....we need a medic.
SHCHEEVONE: You idiot! Manson is back up. He’s looking for a new weapon. He’s getting that sledge hammer. He’s gonna sink that hammer into Jameson’s skull! Wait! He stopped! Manson’s looking at the timer! And we are down to two minutes!
Manson curses and starts to climb the cage, with the sledge hammer. He reaches the top and climbs throught the hole where he was previously jack knifed. Jameson just starts to get up.
SHCHEEVONE: Manson is on top of the cell. I think he wants to climb the cables. There goes Jameson after him! He wants his ass badly! Manson see’s him, and he’s trying to hit him off! Jameson grabs Manson’s leg, and trips him up! He buckled his legs together and tripped him. Jameson on top of the cage now! Manson up! There they go! Manson with rights! Jameson with rights! Manson stikes back but Jameson blocks them! He’s pummeling away! Manson is almost at the egde! Jameson’s gonna punch him off the cell!
WESSIN: He would drop 25 meters!
SHCHEEVONE: GOOD! Jameson strikes another right in Manson! Manson trying to hold his balance! One more will do it! He’s on the edge! The crowd wants him to fall to his death! NO! Manson reversed it!
Manson hip tosses Jameson over the edge. The fans shriek in horror. But Jameson grabs Manson’s arm to prevent a 25 meter plunder.
SHCHEEVONE: AND A HIP TOSS OVER THE EDGE! NO WAIT! JAMESON IS HANGING ON TO MANSON’S ARM! MANSON FALLS TO THE CAGE CEILING SURFACE! HE’S TRYING TO SHAKE HIM OFF!
WESSIN: Oh....OH....(covers his eyes.)
SHCHEEVONE: Jameson grabs the cage and scales it! What speed! Jameson is back up. Manson tackles Jameson down! He’s near one of the torches! Manson is trying to fry Jameson’s face! He’s pushing his face closer but Jameson fights it off! He grabs Manson by the pits and rolls him off! Manson dives for the sledge hammer, and he’s got it! Listen to the crowd! They are loving this shit!
WESSIN: Uh, hello? Only a minute to go!
SHCHEEVONE: One minute to go! Manson and Jameson squaring off. Look! The UWF roster is out on the ramp watching! They can’t believe it! past wrestlers and celebrities are out watching with their own eyes! Breaker, Canolli, Ex, JD, Stanley, they are all out here! The EMT’s are ready! The police are ready! The fans are on there feet and loud!
SHCHEEVONE: Manson and Jameson are circling each other. Manson lunges with the hammer!
SHCHEEVONE: Jameson moved! The hammer hits the steel cage! Did you see the sparks fly!?! Jameson with a hammer blow to the back of Manson! Manson back up, hammer ready! He lunges again! And jumps on Jameson with the shaft! Manson pressing hard on his throat! BUT JAMESON WITH A MONKEY FLIP TO MANSON. What a move to get him off! Both men are back on there feet! Manson tries a swing! Jameson BLOCKED WITH HIS FOREARM! THE SHAFT HIT HIS FOREARM! JAMESON GRABS THE HAMMER BUT MANSON PULLS BACK! AND AN UPPER CUT TO JAMESON USING THE SHAFT!
WESSIN: DAMN IT! 20 SECONDS!
SHCHEEVONE: MANSON HITS JAMESON IN THE GUT WITH THE BUTT END OF THE SLEDGE HAMMER! AND BRINGS THE SHAFT DOWN HARD ON THE BACK OF JAMESON’S NECK! JAMESON IS OUT! MANSON IS STANDING OVER HIM!
Manson raises the slegde hammer in the air, signalling one final blow. The fans just keep going nuts.
SHCHEEVONE: HE’S GONNA SMASH HIS SKULL! HE’S GONNA DO IT! HE RAISES IT! WESSIN: 10 FUCKING SECONDS!
SHCHEEVONE: JAMESON MOVED JUST IN TIME! HE SLIPPED BETWEEN MANSON’S LEGS! MANSON TURNS WITH A WILD SWING! JAMESON DUCKED IT! JAMESON...KICKS COMBS IN THE MIDSECTION! HERE IT IS!
The fans give a huge massive pop
SHCHEEVONE: HELL RAISOR! HELL RAISOR! HELL RAISOR ON THE STEEL CAGE! MANSON IS DOWN!
WESSIN: 5 SECONDS!
Crowd counts down
5
4
3
2
SHCHEEVONE: JAMESON SPRINTS AND JUMPS FOR A CABLE!
1
WESSIN: SSHHHHIIIITTTTT!
The cables explode and are released. The ring and cell plunder 25 meters with Manson out cold on top of the cell. The fans roar loudly as Jameson is seeing hanging on one of the cables.
The ring smashes into peices. The cell crams inward and ripps in half from the force. Debris and dust fly in the air as the fans explode. Manson is no where to be seen.
SHCHEEVONE: HOLY....GOD....CRIST! THE RING IS GONE! IN PIECES WITH MANSON COMBS SOMEWHERE IN THE RUBBLE! EMT’S ARE SEARCHING FRANTICLY! IS HE STILL ALIVE!
Al Jameson reaches the ground, as the fans give a huge ovation. He starts limping toward the carnage that lays in the middle of the arena.
SHCHEEVONE: Jameson is back on the ground. What an ovation by the crowd! They are on their feet! Wait! There....there is something moving in the rubble!
Something moves around a bit, then some pieces of ply wood and other bits of the ring turn over. Manson Combs tries to move to his feet. His body covered with blood and dust. He manages to climb out and stands to his feet. He walks a few paces then collapses.
SHCHEEVONE: IT’S MANSON! HE’S STILL ALIVE! SO FAR! THE CROWD IS IN SHOCK!
WESSIN: (After vomiting) He’s crawling towards that shot gun!
Manson tries to crawl a bit, but then stops and rolls on his back. Wynona rush’s to his aide, obvioulsy shocked.
SHCHEEVONE: Hey, Al Jameson is going for the auto shotgun! He wouldn’t!
Jameson limps to the shot gun. He picks it up with a shell, and loads it up. He then starts towards Manson.
WESSIN: Looks like he’s going for the kill. Just like Manson did.
He reaches Manson who is still lying there. Wynona backs off with her hands in the air. He raises and points the shot gun at Combs. Manson doesn’t move, but his blood covered face just stares up at Jameson. The fans start a chant of "shoot him".
SHCHEEVONE: Jameson is going to shoot Manson! He could end right here! End the longest fued in the UWF history! Manson tried to kill him. He thought he killed him. Will there be an ounce of remoarse left in Jameson. Any ounce of forgivness!
The fans continues to shout out the death of the most hated wrestler in the UWF. Jameson stands, still pointing the shotgun. Manson croaks something.
SHCHEEVONE: I think they are negotiating. I can’t here anything! The police are here! And Wynona is trying to talk him out of it! Take a look at the look in the Icon’s eyes! He’s full of rage and hatred!
Manson holds out a bloody hand. The fans look confused. Jameson still points the gun at him.
(Jameson looks around at the crowd.....he drops the shotgun and turns his back to Manson as he looks at the crowd.)
SHCHEEVONE: What the hell is going on?
WESSIN: I don't have a clue.
SHCHEEVONE: The Icon is pointing at the Ref...he's beconing him to come closer, the Ref is coming....the Icon's just put his foot on the chest of Manson......he's saying something to the Ref.
WESSIN: Whatever is was it just had the word "Peon" in it!
SHCHEEVONE: The Ref is counting! ONE....TWO....THREE!!! That's what it was all about? He just wanted to get the pin?
WESSIN: Don't look at me! I don't know anything about it.
("Film Star" by Suede booms out again as the Icon stands on top of the carnage with his fists raised in the air and the crowd gives a massive pop! In the back ground a figure is standing up...grabbing the shotgun!)
SHCHEEVONE: SHIT! SHIT! Manson's standing! After all that he's standing and he's going for the gun! MY GOD! NOT IN THE BACK!
(The Icon turns and looks dead into the bloody form of Manson Combs with the shotgun...Manson is breathing hard...the Icon stares at him....Manson lowers the shotgun and drops it on the ground. He gives the finger to the Icon and then limps his way back up the entranceway with Wynona helping him.)
SHCHEEVONE: That has got the be the most perverse, sadistic and violant match EVER seen! But even after all that, two feds, numerous matches and fudes, even with all that behind them! They still arn't finished!
WESSIN: Well....I don't know. What more can these two do to each other???
(The Icon raises his fist one last time then half limps and half dragges himself to the back pausing at the enterance looking back at the crowd....he then goes through the curtain.)
SHCHEEVONE: MY GOD ALMIGHTY MERCY JOSEPHINE!!? WHAT THE HELL!!? AL F'IN JAMESON CAME BACK FROM THE DEAD!!!!! I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!!!! JAMESON!!! HE'S BACK!!! MY GOD, can this f'in card get any bigger!?
OVERVIEW: I know one way it might......Champion of Champions match.....with a new mystery champion in the match!?
SHCHEEVONE: Speeking of which, lets look at JDs title win.....man i just can't get over Al Jameson returning!
SHCHEEVONE: JD just picked up Stanley and threw him out of the ring. And now JD is distracting the ref.
WESSIN: Uh oh.
OVERVIEW:Case is picking up Gent!!
SHCHEEVONECase just leveled Gent with that arm sling. But what was in it? A BRICK!! CASE JUST PULLED A BRICK OUT OF THE ARM SLING!! He throws Stanley back in the ring.
EX: That bastard.
OVERVIEW:Where is Ex going?
SHCHEEVONE:I dont know. JD is making the cover...Ex is sliding in the ring. 1.....2.....3!!!! ITS OVER!!! JD WINS!!! JD IS THE NEW UWF CHAMP!! EX TRIED TO BREAK UP THE COUNT BUT DIDN'T MAKE IT IN TIME!! CASE GETS IN THE RING AND IS CELEBRATING WITH JD!! EX CHARGES AT CASE!!!
SHCHEEVONE: Folks.....its time....this is the end....for all the marbles....this is the BIG ONE!
the Gardens is lit up as pyros explode......JJ Buffet takes the mic
JJ BUFFET: Are you prepared.....I SAID, ARE YOU PREPARED!?!?......Well for the tens of hundreds in attendance and the many people watching around the planet.......LLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEETTTTTTTTTTTTSSSSSSS GEEEEEEEET REEEEEAAAAAAAADDDDDDY FOR CHAAAAAAAAAIRRRRRRRRRSHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOTS!!!!
Champion of Champions Match
suddenly "Dirty South" by Goodie Mob hits the PA, Ike walks out and has a mic, he doesn't wait long to cut off the booing and the song
IKE: Hold up there honkey....I got a new little rule. Yah see, frankly Ike is sick and tired of gettin screwed from behind today so i'm gonna make sure that in this match there is only 2 bitches in the ring at once......
ike pulls out a hat
IKE: See here what i have is a hat with the names of all the contenders, including a former champ who just added himself to the goddamn match.
Now what i want JJ here to do is draw a name every time one of these hasbeens and never was's get bounced by Ike so we know who gets my big black foot up they ass next....yah hear?
Yah think yo punk ass can handle that chump?
JJ BUFFET: sure can
Ike hands the hat to JJ
IKE: Good, now make it fast, reruns of Shaft are on in 22 minutes and its the one where Shaft screws a white chick.
Ike tosses the mic down and walks out......
SHCHEEVONE: WHAT A CHANGE OF EVENTS!!? A RANDOM DRAWING!!? THIS IS CRASY!!!
OVERVIEW: I smell a rat.
WESSIN: that was me.....sorry.
RIGGS: i like drawing.
SHCHEEVONE: shuttup.
JJ Buffet picks a name
JJ BUFFET: The first competitor in the Champion of Champions match hails from vancouver BC and is the master of the REAL DEAL......please give it up for 2 time World Champ......"THE BIIIIIIIIIIIIIIG HIT" MANSON COMBS!!!!
"More Human than Human" slams against the PA......Manson Combs, still limping from his last bout, his shocked look from the comeback of Al Jameson still on his face......he looks behind him constantly as he walks to the ring with Wynona.
SHCHEEVONE: ITS COMBS! What has gotta be goin through his head.....he's lookin everywhere for the Icon!
JJ BUFFET: And the SECOND competitor hails from the HEAVENS.......he is the master of the HANDS OF GOD.....'THE GOD" PJ BROOOOOOOOOWN!!!
"Higher" by Creed blasts as gold pyros shoot off. TJ throws rose pedals on the ground infront of PJ as he walks slowly to the ring blowing kisses to a booing crowd
SHCHEEVONE: PJ gets derobed......he rolls in the ring Manson emediately attacks PJ with stomps.....Manson ripping into PJ....PJ gets up, ducks a right hand.....kick to the gut....DDT!!! HIT HARD! a quick pin.................1.................2.....not even close!
OVERVIEW: this is gonna be a dooooosey.
SHCHEEVONE: Manson is up but PJ hits him with a Canadian Backbreaker.....two canucks in there, these guys go way back to the IEW!......PJ drops the elbow and is looking really good right now.....another pin............1...............2....no....Manson rolls out of the ring....PJ DIDN'T LIKE THAT!!! HE PULLS MANNY RIGHT BACK IN.......PJ grabs Manson, REVERSED......BELLY TO BELLY !!!! NAILED IT!!! Manson emediately starts to beat on PJ.....PJ getting ripped into!!! Manson picks him up.....IRISH WHIP INTO THE CORNER!!!
OVERVIEW: HERE HE COMES!
SHCHEEVONE: AVALANCHE!!! Manny in full controll....HE NAILS A CLOTHESLINE AND ANOTHER!!! PJ IS REEEEELING!......Manson signalling....HE GRABS PEEJ.......666 FIRESLAM! MANNY NAILED IT!....Manny in complete controll!.....
OVERVIEW: Manson isn't done quite yet.....he's eyeing the top rope....
SHCHEEVONE: What is he thinking......?
....He's picking PJ up.....could he be going for a Real Deal!?......I think he is....!......
SHCHEEVONE: MY GOD HE AINT DONE!!!! AL IS GOING AFTER MANNY....they just about shot eachother....Al is on the apron....he's scaling the rope.....MANNY TRYIN TO FIGHT HIM OFF....MANNY AND AL ARE ON THE TOP!!! MY GOD!!? WHAT ARE THEY DOING!?.....Al just kneed him......COULD BE THE HELLRAISOR!!!!? NO!!!? IT COULDN'T....WAIT...Manson slipped out......REEEEEEEAL DEEEEEEEAL!!! REEEEEEEAL DEEEEEEEAL!!
OVERVIEW: MY GOOD GOD ALMIGHTY!!!! MANSON JUST REAL DEALED HIM AND AL OFF THE TOP ROPE THROUGH THE BLOODY SPANISH ANNOUNCERS TABLE!?!?
WESSIN: take that TITO!
SHCHEEVONE: TITO IS PISSED!!! HE'S GOIN AFTER WESSIN!!! THESE TWO ARE BATTLING BY THE RING.........MEANWHILE EMTS HAVE POORED OUT! Manny and Al are busted open and both look, pardon my french, royally fucked!!!
EMT's poor out....they signal to the back..,..meanwhile Tito tosses Wes in the ring
OVERVIEW: the EMTs are calling for an ambulence....WAIT!!! LOOK AT THE RING!!!
SHCHEEVONE: MY GOD.....WESSIN JUST GOT THROWN TO THE ROPES......FLYING ELBOW SMASH BY TITO!!!! THATS HIS MOVE!!! WESSIN IS OUT COLD AS HE FLIES OUT OF THE RING!!! TITO FINALLY BEAT UP WESSIN!!! LISTEN TO THE CROWD....
OVERVIEW: MITCH!.....the ref just counted Manson out......PJ MOVES ON!
an ambulence flies in
SHCHEEVONE: my god....Al and Manny are being taken to the hospital.....have they just killed eachother for real!?.....GOOD LORD!? THIS IS TOO MUCH.....
JJ BUFFET: the next competitor is.......hailing from Philladelphia PA....the master of the Ex Marks the Spot......EX!!!!
"Break Stuff" nails the PA as Ex rushes out to a nice pop.....
SHCHEEVONE: EX JUST FLEW TO THE RING....PJ isn't looking, he's too busy watching whats happening outside.....LOOK OUT!....kick to the gut.....EX MARKS THE SPOT!!! HE NAILED IT!!! EX MARKS THE SPOT!!! EX GOT OFF HIS MOVE..............1...............2................3!!! JUST LIKE THAT!! No more God....Ex beat the God and he moves on.....another draw for JJ, but who on earth is the 'mystery champ' Ike was so worried about??
JJ BUFFET: the next competitor in the champion of champions match.....he is the master of the Thrilling Point and the Return to Lunacy......he will go down as the LAST WORLD CHAMP......"THE KING" JD LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWSON!
"Take the Money and Run" slams against the PA as the original Natural Born Thriller walks out. Ex jumps the rope and goes after him
SHCHEEVONE: RICO AND JACK CUT EX OFF....NO THEY DONT', DOUBLE CLOTHESLINE!!!! Lawson and Ex are face to face....Ex grabs Lawson and tosses him head first into the rail.......SLAMMING HIM HARD! AND AGAIN!....Ex rakes JD across the big UWF sign!
OVERVIEW: this could get bloody.
SHCHEEVONE: Ex draws JD back.....IRISH WHIP!!!
OVERVIEW: JD JUST GOT WHIPPED THROUGH THE UWF SIGN!! JD IS REELING.....Ex grabs a big pole.....my god whats he gonna do?
SHCHEEVONE: THAT HIT HARD!!!
RIGGS: thats what she said.
SHCHEEVONE: What does THAT mean? Do you ever do comentary?
RIGGS:Comentary eh?...... WHAT A MOVE.....The one guy with the X on his pants is beating up the other guy with the crown.....this is a tactical masterpiece by X-boy over Crowny....i can't belie-
SHCHEEVONE: please stop.
RIGGS: THAT WAS A GREAT REVERSE POWER PILE LARIAT SUPERSLAM!! Stupednous manuvering by X-boy.
OVERVIEW: i'll gag him.
SHCHEEVONE: thank you.....Ex has JD bloody and battered....he just suplexed JD onto the steele. and now Ex is grabbing a ladder.....What on earth.....EX IS STANDING UP A LADDER.....IS HE?.....HE COULDN'T BE.....CLIMBING THE LADDER......DRAGGING JD WITH HIM........EX ON THE LADDER!!!!! EX MARKS THE SPOT!!! GOOD GOD!!!! HE LANDED IT!!!
OVERVIEW: EX JUST GOT COUNTED OUT!!! It doesn't matter Ex got counted out!
SHCHEEVONE: What about JD!?
OVERVIEW: JD never reached the ring.....his count doesn't start til he reaches the ring.......Ex is out but he left JD for dead on the ground....Ex throws his hands up for the crowd as refs are trying to take him out.....Ex is taking off through the crowd.....THIS IS AMAZING!
SHCHEEVONE: Wessin would be pround, if he was beat up by a washed up mexican.
RIGGS: Who? Ricky martin?
SHCHEEVONE:haha.
JJ BUFFET: the next competitor hails from New Mexico....he is the master of the THUNDERING HOOVES....the one the only....STAAAAAAAAAAAAALLION!!
"Blood Red Skies" by Judas Priest blares as Stallion rushes to get JD....he grabs JD and pulls him to the ring, tossing him in.
SHCHEEVONE: these two were just in eachothers stable....now look at them!? Stallion picks up JD, he tosses JD to the corner.....CROSSBODY COMING UP.....JD MOVED!!! STAL WENT OVER THE TURNBUCKLE!!! Now JD hanging him up there and pounding the crap out of Stal.....Stallion is hung out to dry!
OVERVIEW: JD can keep beating him untill Stal gets unhooked.
SHCHEEVONE: Which he just did, flipping to the ground. JD picks him up and tosses him to the ropes.....JD LEAPS!!! HURRICANRANA!!!! WHAT A FUCKIN MOVE!!!................1................2................NO! STAL KICKED OUT!! JD not stoppin there.
OVERVIEW: why should he, Stal is hurtin.
SHCHEEVONE: sure is....JD picks Stal up and nails a tilt-o-wirl backbreaker.....nice move and JD takes no time to go upstairs.....WAIT....he's calling for something......RICO JUST HANDED HIM A CHAIR....JD PUTS THE CHAIR ON THE ELBOW........AH!
OVERVIEW: STAL JUST BUSTED OPEN!
SHCHEEVONE: Elbow drop with a chair!!! Stallion is hurt...............1.....................2..................3!!! NO! NO! JD DIDN'T GET HIM!....JD arguing with the ref....WATCH OUT...Stal spring up.....REVERSED DDT! NAILED IT! STal floats over......TOSSIN PUNCHES TO THE FOREHEAD OF THE KING!
OVERVIEW: this is an all lout, gloves dropped, slobberknocker.
SHCHEEVONE: JD FLIPS STAL.....lefts and rights by JD.....JD peppering Stallion and leaving him there.....now JD signalling to Rico and Jack again...? What is he doing!?.....
OVERVIEW: BARBED WIRE!!! OH NO!!!
SHCHEEVONE: JD has barbed wire and is wrapping it around that chair.....this is BAAAAD NEWS.......Stallion gets up, stumbling....HE GETS CAUGHT....THRILLING POINT COMING UP!!!! MY GOD NO!!!
SHCHEEVONE: NAILED IT!!! NAILED IT!!! JD WITH A PIN............1..............2.............3!!! Its over.....WAIT!!! LOOK AT STALS FOOT!? How'd he do that?!....Stallion had his foot on the ropes.....JD IS PISSED!!! HE CAN'T BELIEVE IT!!! JD grabs the barbedwire chair.....he's ready....Stallion getting up, a bloody mess.......
SHCHEEVONE: JD MISSED........THUUUUNDERING HOOOOOVES!!! NAILED IT!!! NAILED IT!!!
OVERVIEW: HERES THE PIN..........1.....................2................3!!! NO!!!NO!!!NO!!!
SHCHEEVONE: What in gods name?.....how'd he do that?.....Stallion turns around....
OVERVIEW: RICO NAILED STAL WITH THE BARBED WIRE CHAIR!!! STAL IS OUT COLD!!!
SHCHEEVONE: JD ROLLS ON STAL.................1..................2..................3!!! ITS OVER!!! ITS OVER!!! ITS OVER!!! JD BEATS STAL WITH HELP FROM RICO!!
JJ BUFFET: The next competitor is.....he hails from the BRITISH ISLES......he is the MASTER of the FACEDOWN......"THE ENGLISH GENT" LAAAAAAWRENCE STANLEY!!!
"God Save the Queen" blares as Lawrence Stanley rushes out to a HUGE pop....he slides in the ring
SHCHEEVONE: THE CO-WORLD CHAMPS ARE IN THERE FOR ONE LAST TILT......JD swings and misses TEG,.....right, and another....KNIFE EDGE CHOP!!! AND ANOTHER!!! INTO THE CORNER!!! Gent rips the shirt of JD off......HUGE CHOP!!! GENT FLIPS JD OVER THE ROPES WITH THAT ONE!!! JD on the apron......Gent runs at him.....JD LOWERS THE ROPES AND BACK BODY DROPS HIM!!!
OVERVIEW: Stanley hit hard.....JD on the apron, he looks like its thrilling time.
SHCHEEVONE: JD WITH A MOONSAULT OFF THE RING APRON!!! WHAT A MOVE!!! HE NAILED IT!!......JD grabs Gent and slams him into the railing.....JD with a whip...REVERSED!!! JD SLAMS INTO THE STEPS!!!! Now Gent has grabbed a fire extinguisher.....
OVERVIEW: JDs about to cool off.
SHCHEEVONE: STANLEY JUST BLEW THAT THING ALL OVER JD!!!
RIGGS: hehe.....he blew the load.
SHCHEEVONE: fraudian slip.......Gent grabs JD and tosses him into the ring.....WHAT THE HELL!?....GENT IS PULLING OUT A TABLE.....GENT THROWS THE TABLE INTO THE RING......JD staggers up as Gent sets the table up in the corner......HERE COMES AN IRISH WHIP.....
OVERVIEW: JD REVERSED IT!!! AMAZING!!!
SHCHEEVONE: JD is calling for his half of the world belt....Rico just handed it to him....and now Jack is handing him Gent's half.....what is JD DOING!?.....HE'S SAYING HE'S THE CHAMP!!! LOOKS LIKE IT COULD BE......THRILLING POINT!!! NO!! GENT ROLLED OFF THE BACK....GENT SWINGS JD AROUND.......FAAAAAAACEDOWN!!! FAAAAAAACEDOWN!!!! HE NAILED IT ON THE TWO HALVES OF THE UWF BELT!......here's the pin......................1.....................2....................3!!!
OVERVIEW: WHAT A WIN FOR STANLEY!!! JD IS OUT!!! JD IS OUT!!
SHCHEEVONE: But when are we gonna see Ike, or that mystery opponent?
OVERVIEW: I said it before and i'll say it again....i smell a rat.
JJ BUFFET: the next challenger hails from Trights.....he is the master of the BROKEN ELBOWS......."THE URBAN LEGEND" BIIIIIIIIG BAAAAAAAAD BREEEEEEEEAKER!!!
"U Can't C Me" by 2Pac blares as BBB walks out looking slightly t'd off. Breaker walks to the ring and rolls in, he's pointing at longtime rival Stanley and shouting obscenities
SHCHEEVONE: BBB has been all over the place today. The Tritans took the greatest tag match, the AoD reunited, he and Canolli battled and now him and Stanley set to let the fur fly....Ellis, the mystery man and Ike remain.
OVERVIEW: Here goes...they lock up.
SHCHEEVONE: Breaker with a headlock, REVERSED.....SLEEPER BY STANLEY....REVERSED....BELLY TO BACK!!! SLAMMED HIM!! Breaker wastes no time laying the elbow drop down......now laying the stomps......Breaker picks Stanley up and flings him to the ropes.......HUGE DROPKICK!!! BREAKER NAILED STANLEY TO THE RING FLOOR!!!....
OVERVIEW: Breaker has that psychotic look in his eye.
SHCHEEVONE: he sure does.......Breaker runs.........SUICIDE DIVE!!! HE MISSED!!!
OVERVIEW: BREAKER JUST TOOK OUT THE RAIL!!! THE CROWD IS EVERYWHERE!!! Stanley has Breaker in the crowd! Stanley just floored Breaker as the crowd spreads....
SHCHEEVONE: they're brawling up the stairs.....Breaker just nailed Stanley off the railing.....Stanley returned the favor....Stanley whips breaker into a concreat wall.....
OVERVIEW: STANLEY JUST GRABBED A TRAY OF BEER FROM A BEER VENDOR!
SHCHEEVONE: He just nocked one back......
OVERVIEW: HE NAILED BBB WITH THE TRAY!!!
SHCHEEVONE: This is crasy....Stanley misses a right hand and Breaker hot shots him over the rail.....these two are 20 feet up!!!
OVERVIEW: the ref has stopped counting....he's watchin in awe!
SHCHEEVONE: Who on earth would ever count these two out? You might as well stab all the fans in the back at once.
Look at Breaker, dangling Stanley over the edge.....breaker just grabbed some chicks purse....he's searching through it for something to use......HE FOUND?....MASE!!! MASE!!! BBB JUST SPRAYED STANLEY WITH MASE!!! STANLEY IS REELING....BREAKER GOES AFTER STANLEY....CLOTHESLINE!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
OVERVIEW: BREAKER AND STANLEY JUST WENT OFF THE EDGE THROUGH A GODDAMN BLOODY GATOR-AID TABLE!!! A 20 FOOT DROP!!! MY GOD!!! BREAKER AND STANLEY ARE HURT!!!
SHCHEEVONE: The ref is starting his count again....they aren't even moving...................11...........................12.............................13.............................14.............................15..........................16...........................17.....BREAKER IS UP AND LIMPING TO THE RING.....STANLEY IS AFTER HIM!!........................19.....BOTH MEN SLIDE IN!!! THEY'RE TOSSING LEFTS AND RIGHTS!!! LEFTS AND RIGHTS!!! Stanley backs him to the ropes....IRISH WHIP......BIG SWINGING CLOTHESLINE!!! STANLEY SIGNALLING.....COULD BE THE FACEDOWN......HERE IT COMES!!! NO!! REVERSED....BACK BODY DROP......STANLEY IS DOWN.....BBB IS SIGNALLING......BROKEN ELBOWS!!! BROKEN ELBOWS!!!! HE HIT IT!!!! THE CROWD POPS BIGTIME!!! HERE'S A PIN..........................1........................2....................NO! NO! STANLEY KICKED OUT!!! MY GOD!!!......Breaker can't believe it....
OVERVIEW: he's rushing out of the ring looking for something- oh wait...ROBIN HAS!?.....ITS...ROBIN just grabbed Blazes BONG! BLAZE IS FIGHTING HER BUT IT DOESN'T MATTER.....ROBIN HANDS THE BONG TO BREAKER.....Stanley is wavering as he gets up....BREAKER IN THE RING......
SHCHEEVONE: STANLEY IS BUSTED OPEN BAD!!! WATER AND WEED AND GLASS EVERYWHERE.......HERE IT COMES!!! BROKEN ELBOWS #2!!! HE HIT IT!!! WHAT A MOVE!!!.................1....................2....................3!!!
OVERVIEW: WHAT A BATTLE!!! CAN WE SEE THAT FOR 20 MORE MINUTES!?
SHCHEEVONE: I must say Ike will likely miss Shaft.....
JJ BUFFET: the next competitor in the Champion of Champions match hails from NEW YORK CITY!!! He is the master of the HOSTIIIIIIILE TAKEOVER....the former President of the UWF......"THE CORPERATE RAIDER" ELLIS JACKSON!!!
"The Corperate Anthem" by Devo hits the PA as Ellis Jackson walks out and plays to the crowd.....Breaker goes after him
SHCHEEVONE: BREAKER GIVING CHASE.....Breaker hit him at the runway and slams him into the UWF tron.....BBB just whipped him through the curtain....we're backstage!!! Breaker just slammed Ellis into a bunch of camera equiptment....OH SHIT we've LOST OUR FEED!!
OVERVIEW: this is great......we're missing it.
RIGGS: can i go yet?
SHCHEEVONE: WAIT THE FEED IS BACK AND BREAKER HAS JUST SLAMMED ELLIS THROUGH A GARAGE DOOR......Ellis is hurt...Breaker coming after him lays blows into the stomach....Ellis struggles up....he has a pipe...
OVERVIEW: Well Robin wont be having kids anytime soon.
SHCHEEVONE: Ellis trying to turn the tides.....GORILLA PRESS!!
OVERVIEW: RIGHT ONTO A PILE OF CHAIRS!
SHCHEEVONE: Ellis is looking around for something interesting...and i think he just found it....Ellis has a tool box!! he pops it open......A MONKEY WRENCH!!! .....ELLIS COMES AFTER BREAKER....BREAKER KICKS HIM FROM THE GROUND.....LOW BLOW BY BREAKER!
OVERVIEW: Some dirtyness coming back to Breaker.
SHCHEEVONE: the Urban Legend just grabbed Ellis....irish whip! HE JUST TOSSED ELLIS INTO A LOCKEROOM!!!....ITS B-REAL AND B-LEGITS LOCKEROOM!......They're packing up their stuff....but they look pissed......B-REAL AND B-LEGIT START POUNDING ON ELLIS......WAIT!!! BREAKER WITH A DOUBLE CLOTHESLINE!!!
OVERVIEW: RIGHT THREW THE COFFEE TABLE!!!
SHCHEEVONE: Breaker picks up Ellis and pulls him out of the lockeroom.....Breaker has Ellis by the tie and is pulling him back through the curtain...LISTEN TO THE CROWD AS THESE TWO ENTER THE STADIUM!......Breaker pulling Ellis in the ring.....
OVERVIEW: Breaker lookin to finish Ellis off
SHCHEEVONE: BREAKER JUST GRABBED A LADDER AND IS SETTING IT UP!!!.........WHAT IS HE DOING!!?....ELLIS is up....BUT NOT FOR LONG!?.....B-BOMB!!! HE NAILED IT!!!.....
OVERVIEW: Look what Robin just threw in the ring.
SHCHEEVONE: A TABLE!!! MY GOD!!! BREAKER SETTING UP THE TABLE AND PUSHING ELLIS ONTOP.......WHAT IS HE DOING!!! HE'S CLIMBING THE LADDER!!?......COULD IT BE!?.....HE'S NOT!!?.....GOD NO!....BROKEN ELBOWS OFF THE 20 FOOT LADDER THROUGH A GODDAMN MUTHER FUCKING TABLE NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
OVERVIEW: ELLIS MOVED!!! HE MOVED!!! BREAKER JUST DROPPED 20 FEET THROUGH A TABLE!!!
SHCHEEVONE: MY GOD!!! HERE'S THE PIN!!...................1.......................2.......................3!!! ELLIS WINS!!! ELLIS WINS!!! WHAT A GODDAMN MATCH!!! BREAKER KILLED HIMSELF IN 2 STRAIGHT MATCHES....his 4th and 5th of the night and would you listen to the crowd....this is the loudest i have ever heard....Breaker is getting a standing ovation after putting his life on the line for half this PPV!
JJ BUFFET: the next competitor is.....well......is the MYSTERY CHAMPION!
SHCHEEVONE: WHO COULD IT BE!?....WHO WAS IKE SO WORRIED ABOUT!?
OVERVIEW: WE'RE ABOUT TO FIND OUT!
JJ BUFFET: He hails from VANCOUVER CANADA....he is the master of the SLY-ON TAMER......here is "2 SLY" SIMON RIIIIIIIIIIIIGS!!!
RIGGS: gotta go.
"Sucks to be you" by Prozzak plays as Simon Riggs ducks under the ropes and into the ring.....suddenly a huge pop is heard as Isaac McBride walks out smiling.....
SHCHEEVONE: I SEE IT ALL NOW!!! ITS ALL A PLAN!!! IKE RIGGED IT, LITTERALLY.....He wants to set up him and the MORON RIGGS at the end......all he's gotta do is get rid of Ellis Jackson!!
OVERVIEW: Ellis is screwed....Ike is at ringside and there is no DQ. He's going to screw Ellis right over.
SHCHEEVONE: Riggs comes after Ellis, Ellis ducks a feeble attempt and nails Riggs with a clothesline....now Ellis grabs the ladder.....he wants to end this quick.....
OVERVIEW: RIGGS GOT NAILED!!
SHCHEEVONE: No Wessin....no Riggs....my god, the average intelligence at this table raised 150 points.
OVERVIEW: not to mension the average penis size.
SHCHEEVONE: HAHAHAHA.....WAIT! IKE IS ON THE APRON.... HE GRABBED ELLIS......RIGGS JUST HEADBUTTED ELLIS IN THE STOMACH! IKE GRABS HIM.....OH GOD NO.....
OVERVIEW: REVERSE SUPLEX THROUGH THE GODDAMN BELL TABLE!!!
SHCHEEVONE: IKE IS LAYING INTO ELLIS....JUST BEATING THE TAR OUT OF HIM.....Ike gouges the eyes.....now he's reaching into his pocket.....CHAIR!!! HE HAS A CHAIN AND IS WRAPPING IT AROUND HIS NUCKLE......PUNCH AFTER PUNCH!! BLOOD IS EVERYWHERE!!! IKE IS GOING PSYCHO....Ellis is hurting BAD.......
OVERVIEW: Ellis got revenge on Thad earlier but he isn't going to remember it after this beating.
SHCHEEVONE: Ike just told 2 Sly to attack Ellis.....WAIT....HE'S GOT HIM IN THE SLY-ON TAMER!!! OUTSIDE THE RING THEY ARE BREAKING ELLIS'S BACK!! SLY-ON TAMER ON ELLIS......
OVERVIEW: Good lord, Ike is grabbing a leg off that bell table....those are big pieces of metal folks...
SHCHEEVONE: THIS HAS GOT TO BE IT.....Ellis is royally fucked....Ike is telling Riggs to set Ellis up.......WHAT ON EARTH.....there are no tables left so Ike is stacking chairs from the audience together...Riggs laying Ellis across the chairs as Ike is going to the top of the....WAIT! NO!.....IKE IS GOING TO THE TOP ROPE.....THIS COULD BE BAD NEWS!!......OH GOD NO!!!.....SOUTHSIDE SPLASH COMING UP!!!
OVERVIEW: GOOD LORD ALMIGHTY!!! I HEARD RIBS AND BACKS BREAK....IKE JUST FUCKED ELLIS UP ROYALLY....Riggs is dragging a destroyed Ellis Jackson into the ring....Ike's master plan is about to unfold!!!
SHCHEEVONE: that filthy son of a bitch......c'mon Ellis, get up....Ike is telling Riggs to pin Ellis....Riggs is having trouble understand......Ike's describing it......Riggs looks puzzled......Oh god, this could take a while.
OVERVIEW: Luckly Ellis is out cold and might never get up.
SHCHEEVONE: Ike just pinned Ellis to show Riggs what he wants Riggs to do.....Riggs is analysing it......LOOK OUT! ROLL UP!!! ROLL UP BY A HALF DEAD ELLIS JACKSON!!!...................1........................2.......................3!!!
OVERVIEW: MY GOD! LOOK AT IKE'S FACE!!! HE CAN'T BELIEVE IT!!
SHCHEEVONE: Ellis rolled Riggs up....now its Ike and Ellis.
JJ BUFFET: the final competitor hails from Atlanta Georgia and is the master of the SOUTHSIDE SPLASH......currently in the ring......ISAAAAAAAC McBRIIIIIIIIDE!!!
SHCHEEVONE: ELLIS AND McBRIDE...THE CHAMPION OF CHAMPIONS HAS COME DOWN TO THIS.......Ike is still reeling as Ellis staggers to his feet......blood poring from his head, eye, mouth, nose and ears....cracked ribs and lickly a broken nose.....
OVERVIEW: i haven't seen a buisinessman look this bad since Fight Club.
SHCHEEVONE: Ike is circling....he looks as if he's waiting for something.....
suddenly there is a pop.....then Ike has a sly smile on his face
OVERVIEW: HE DIDN'T!
SHCHEEVONE: Ike always has a plan.....look who just showed up....its THADDIUS F'IN HUBER!
OVERVIEW: How in gods name is Ellis going to run with these two?
SHCHEEVONE: Thad makes his way to the ring as Ellis just rolled his eyes into the back of his head......Thad has a briefcase....Ike and Ellis lock up...Ike with an irish whip...duck under.....THAD JUST NAILED ELLIS WITH A KNEE FROM BEHIND....Ellis spins around......THAD HAS A JACKSON CO PAPERWEIGHT!!! ELLIS DOESN'T SEE IT.....HERE COMES IKE....
SHCHEEVONE: AHHH!!! ELLIS DUCKED!!! ELLIS DUCKED!!! THAD ACCIDENTALLY NAILED IKE WITH THE JACKSONCO PAPERWEIGHT.......ELLIS GRABS THAD.....NAILED HIM!!! THAD FALLS TO THE FLOOR.....JACKSON GRABS IKE......MY GOD!!! HOSTILE TAKEOVER!!! HE HAS IT ON!!! HE HAS IT ON!!! IKE IS OUT COLD!!! THE REF CHECKS!!!! ITS OVER!!!!! MY GOD ITS OVER!!! ELLIS IS THE CHAMPION OF F'IN CHAMPIONS!!!! ELLIS JACKSON!!! THE FORMER PREZ!!! HE'S THE CHAMPION OF CHAMPIONS!!!! IKE TRIED EVERYTHING BUT COULDNT PUT ELLIS AWAY!
the crowd pops big time....Ellis Jackson raises his hands as high as he can as the crowd stands on their feet.......suddenly from the back poors all the UWF stars....every last one of them walks out as the crowd continues to go buck wild....nobody can hear themselves thing......
SHCHEEVONE: LOOK AT THIS!!! MY GOD!!! ITS EVERYBODY!!! THE CROWD IS GOIN WILD!!! THIS IS THE END!!! THE END OF AN ERA....THE END OF THE GREATEST FED KNOWN TO MAN!!!......THE END OF MY JOB!
FOR THE LAST TIME....WE'RE OUTTA TIME....GOODNIGHT!
"Feul" by Metallica blasts as Ellis walks into the huge crowd of wrestlers, the crowd keeps screaming
FADE TO BLACK
Note from the Prez: Basically i judged this whole card on trying to give evrybody their moment in the sun. We all worked hard and nobody should get jobbed....thats why in the stables match i had BBB get knocked out first and Cykill win the thing....thats why I threw Dark Fang, Case and others on there, and why Blaze won the tag match. The fact is alot of guys waited a long time for this and i didn't want anybody to go home empty handed.
The Champion of Champions match i judged on who worked hardest for the fed...it was espessially hard since 1. i wasn't gonna make myself win, 2. Al wasn't in the match, 3. Everybody in the match more than pulled their weight. However i decided that Ellis had to get something for the killer job he did as Prez....so often the prez is underapreaciated and let me tell you that i know it first hand....so bravo on the great presidency and all your help with cards through the months of my presidency.
Secondly, i appoligise for a couple of things, 1. Breaker/ Canolli.... i completely forgot about the weapons stips in your match untill i had already written it....i'm sorry but due to time constraints i just fixed your angle so it went with the match,
2.I forgot some vital statistics during writing it, so if i forgot your finishing move (Vinny D) or your theme song (RR, Tiberon, Ellis) i might have goofed it up. Also, Stallion, for the life of me i couldn't remember where he was from, i seemed to remember New Mexico, so i went with it, sorry if he's from Delaware or something.
3 to Tiberon and the RR...the jpg never worked....not sure what happened but i did my best.
4 Sorry for how long it took...i really overbooked myself and the card wasn't a priority over my school and work.
Lastly Thanks have to go out to some key people.....First of all Ross aka Lawrence Stanley, you were the only guy to step forward and help me with matches.....and let me tell you they kicked ass. Thanks for being my go to guy for so long and always having your stuff done on time even though mine seldom was. Al Jameson, my other go to guy for so long, thanks for pulling out way too many cards for me when i was crasy busy.....nice to see you copp out and bring the Icon back. And i promise no more british joke. PS: i made you. Ex for always giving me help when i needed it.....people wonder why i pushed you to world champ an i always tel em it was cus while they were complaining and bitching about it you were helping me write three matches in 2 hours when my card was late and then going and workin on the site, then roleplaying 3 times. If they don't think you were worthy of that push then fuck em.
Stallion for handling Mikey Masters, working an angle with me and not having me know the whole time....and for helping me with the fed so many times.
Tommy Gunn/ Prodegy For being great webmasters. You were way under appreciated sometimes but that kickass sight was due to you guys. And for Tommy being the brunt of atleast 400 'yo mumma' jokes.
Agent Steele and Tony C more cardwriting praise....people don't realise how fucked a prez would be without yah.
BBB for writing half of every card every time you sent in an angle....and for having the html right.
JD for being the one and only true PJmaniak! DIZAM.
and finally to Prez Mac, Ellis, Razor and to a lesser Extent Fly-T for doing what i had to do.....and hoping to never have to do it again.
Peace out.