I was four and my mum and dad opened a bottle of wine for Christmas. They took the glasses into the kitchen, I followed them and drank the leftovers when they were back in the front room. They realised I was drunk when I tried to sit in a chair. I missed it!
When did you first disobey your parents?
At 13, I used to meet my friends at the end of our road. My mum could see us from my balcony and she would come out and shout, "That's it, time to come in now." I remember shouting back, "No way!" My mum was angry and dragged me home.
What's the biggest lie you ever told?
I don't really tell lies - well, maybe little white ones now and again. Mind you, I told my ex-boyfriend I had to finish with him because my manager wouldn't allow it. Hopefully he won't read this and discover the truth!
Did you ever bunk off school?
No, but I used to have breakfast with my friends first, so I'd be late. I'd apologize sweetly and they'd let me off.
Have you ever been in a fight?
At primary school I had an argument with another blonde about whose hair was real. We grabbed each other's hands and pushed one another. Kids' stuff really.
How hard are you?
I think I'm quite hard. I have a strong punch anyway. I'm probably the hardest out of the girls. That's what they tell me anyway!
Have you ever cheated on a boyfriend?
No, and I don't think I would. I believe in finishing one relationship before starting another. It's not fair on him or you. If I liked someone else that much, then I'm sure my boyfriend at the time would know.
What's the cruellest thing you've ever said?
My brother was going through a spotty stage and was having a terrible time. I took the mickey out of him and caused him real grief. It was a really intensive thing to do and I feel guilty about it now.
Have you ever not paid a bus, train ot taxi fare?
I bunked my fare on the train a couple of times. I'd travel the two stops from my house to college and when the ticket collector asked me for the fare at the other end I'd say I'd only been one stop. It actually cost me an extra 50p for two stops - a lot of money when you're at college. Anyway, one time the inspector caught me. He'd followed me and, of course, I'd lied when I was questioned. I started crying and in the end he let me off, heh heh!
Would you snog anyone to get your own way?
No, that's horrible. If the person wants to give you the job then they'll do so without any funny business.
Have you ever taken the credit for something you didn't do?
Yes, I seem to remember doing stuff like that when I was younger, but I'm a bit vague as to exactly what the situation was. It will have been at primary school and I'll have taken praise for someone else's painting or something.
Have you ever made anyone cry?
I made my mum cry once, when we had a row a couple of months ago. We never usually argue, so this made it even worse and I think that's why she ended up crying. To make up, I waved a white sock through the front room door. Luckily it worked and we were able to laugh it off. My mum's my best friend and I hated upsetting her.
What's the worst punishment you've ever had?
I remember one time I was very angry and went up to my room and started mucking it up. I threw stuff all over the place and smashed a couple of things. My mum waited outseide until I'd finished, then she came in and said, "Now tidy it up." It was so frustrating.
How quickly can you talk yourself out of a mess?
I can't. I'm really terrible, especially when lying comes into it. I start off trying, but after a couple of seconds I'm stuttering and spluttering all over the place. I end up looking silly until I come clean and say, "OK, the truth is..."
Have you ever had a run-in with the police?
Never, I'm just not that naughty!
What's the naughtiest thing you've ever done?
Everyone in my form had their paintings up in the art room. I wasn't good at art and neither was this boy Aaron, so we went in with a fire extinguisher and sprayed the lot. The pictures were ruined. An assembly was called to find out who's done it, but we didn't own up. If you're listening Aaron, keep quiet!
Anything you want to add?
I'd just like to say a big sorry to my brother, as I know I'm horrible to him. It's quite busy at home, and I'm either tired or running around. So if you're reading this, I love you lots and don't mean to be rude to you.
TOTP VERDICT:
Emma Bunton needs to be aware that as she gets older you can't get out of something by turning on the waterworks! However, we've taken into consideration that she knows when she's done wrong. Most of her naughtiness was when she was younger and she's the first to apologize!
TOTP SENTANCE:
No sticky buns for a week!
TOP SECRET: Ginger
When was the first time you can remember doing anything bad?
When I was about eight, I was in lunchtime and the school whistle blew. I couldn't be bothered to go in, so I hid in a tyre that was in a nearby orchard. I fell asleep and missed dinner. It wasn't until lessons started that they realised I was missing and came looking for me. I was in big trouble, but I was always naughty at school.
When did you first disobey your parents?
I did loads of naughty things - too naughty to say, but it's probably that when I found money lying around the house, I'd steal it. I'd go to the corner shop, buy an ice cream and eat it before I went back.
What's the biggest lie you ever told?
Probably the one where I said I was born on a plane while flying over the mountains between France and Spain so no one could decide what nationality I was. That was a good one.
Did you ever bunk off school?
Yes, and the first time I did it I was caught! I was 14 and I went round to my friend's house. Funnily enough, it was to dodge a music lesson because the teacher was really strict. I was always in trouble, though. I went to an all-girls' school and hated wearing uniform. I'd roll my skirt up and socks down and would put black eyeliner all round my eyes. I was often in detention.
Have you ever been in a fight?
Yes, I've been in a few. I remember being at school when two girls pinned me against a wall. They took my comb, and after combing it through this girl's horrible, greasy hair, they tried to comb it through mine. I was shouting, "No, no please." They ended up shoving it up my nose, and I got into as much trouble as them.
How hard are you?
I'm quite soft really. I think I'm a very open person and would talk to anyone. The only time I'd be aggressive is if someone I really care about was being hurt. If I saw someone being horrible to Emma, for example, I'd be really upset and annoyed.
Have you ever cheated on a boyfriend?
Yes, it was when I was in my late teens. It's great when you first start going out with a boy, but when I used to come to the end of a relationship I'd find myself with someone else - there was an overlap. I always felt guilty afterwards, but it was an exciting thing to do. I wouldn't do it now, though.
What's the cruellest thing you've ever said?
I didn't say it - I wrote it down. A girl at school had BO, so I wrote her a note telling her she smelt and put it in her desk. I didn't sign it, obviously. Sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind.
Have you ever not paid a bus, train ot taxi fare?
A couple of years ago, I was in London going back to Maidenhead but i only had enough money for a child fare. I was 21 at the time, so I put my hair in plaits, hunched my shoulders and went to a ticket desk. I put on a scouse accent and asked for a half. They asked how old I was and I said 13. They fell for it anyway!
Would you snog anyone to get your own way?
No, no that's horrible. In fact, I've been propositioned with that and I've said, "No thank you, I'm not that sort of person." The guy gave me the job in the end for being so straight up.
Have you ever taken the credit for something you didn't do?
I can't remember doing so, but maybe when I was very young. I think you should always give credit where credit's due. After all, everyone wants to be respected for what they've done.
Have you ever made anyone cry?
I think I'm more likely to cry than make others do it!
What's the worst punishment you've ever had?
I used to fight like hell with my brother and sisters. I once bit my sister's back and when my mum found out she hit me with a red plastic flip-flop.
How quickly can you talk yourself out of a mess?
Very easily. I have the gift of the gab, but I try to avoid getting into sticky situations.
Have you ever had a run-in with the police?
Only for silly little things, but I'm not about to say.
What's the naughtiest thing you've ever done?
Heh heh, I'm yet to do it!
Anything you want to add?
Yes. Vivienne Westwood slated us and said we were 'slung up'. You can tell her I still wear her shoes!
TOTP VERDICT:
Geri Halliwell needs to be kept in line to avoid roller-coasting off the rails, because she has admitted she intends to continue her bad girl ways. Her tendancy to tell white lies is concerning - it's important that these small white fibs don't escalate into big black ones.
TOTP SENTANCE:
Twenty slaps on the bottom with a Vivienne Westwood red, plastic flip-flop!
TOP SECRET: Posh
When was the first time you can remember doing anything bad?
I remember sitting in our family car with my brother, Christian, and sister, Louise, when my dad popped into a shop. I took the handbrake off and the car rolled down a hill and into a wall. It was totally smashed up, and when my dad came back I told him Christian had done it. My poor brother was too little to talk at the time, but he carried the blame and until this day I've never told anyone it was really me!
When did you first disobey your parents?
My parents always let me do what I wanted, so there was never any need to disobey them!
What's the biggest lie you ever told?
Before I was a Spice Girl I tried to get work as a dancer. I'd lie about my height and turn up for auditions in high shoes. It didn't really help though, as I'm crap at dancing anyway!
Did you ever bunk off school?
No, because I was too scared. But my mum always wrote me excuse letters for PE, which was a huge relief because all that jumping about used to make my hair go frizzy! The teachers didn't like the fact that I always managed to worm my way out of it, and every day they'd have at me because I'd turn up to school wearing too much make-up!
Have you ever been in a fight?
Once. A girl called Hanna kept laughing at my nose, so I smacked her in the face. It was the only fight I've ever had in my life, and I had the last laugh because years later I went out with her boyfriend!
How hard are you?
Oh dear. Not very hard at all. I win all my battles with my sharp-witted tongue.
Have you ever cheated on a boyfriend?
Erm, no.
Have you ever not paid a bus, train ot taxi fare?
Do you know, all the way through school I used to hear people saying, "Are you busing or footing it?" and I'd think, "What the hell are they on about?" It was only recently that I realised 'busing it' meant catching a bus. Well, you wouldn't have caught me getting on a bus when I was at school.
My dad always took me to and from school. I've never done a runner from a taxi either, but I'd like to. If I did it now, the taxi driver would probably sell his story to the papers, so it wouldn't be worth all the aggro!
Would you snog anyone to get your own way?
Definitely not. Unless it was for something like 50 per cent discount on Prada clothes!
Have you ever taken the credit for something you didn't do?
Yes, my make-up. Whenever someone compliments me on it, I always pretend I've done it myself even though I've probably been sitting in a chair with a make-up artist powdering away for two hours!
Have you ever made anyone cry?
Yes, an old boyfriend. He absolutely howled like mad when I dumped him. But he deserved it, he was an idiot!
What's the worst punishment you've ever had?
I was once sent to my room at two o'clock in the afternoon. I can't remember what I'd done, but I was furious that I had so sit up there on my own. Was I allowed to watch TV in there? Oh yes!
How quickly can you talk yourself out of a mess?
The thing about me is that I end up talking myself into situations. Just yesterday we were in a huge hurry and we had to walk past a crowd of kids. Without thinking I stopped to talk to them, and we ended up having to sign about 60 autographs before we could move on!
Have you ever had a run-in with the police?
I was driving around in a posh car and the police stopped me. They thought I was too young to be driving it. But it was mine, so there was no problem.
What's the naughtiest thing you've ever done?
Quite recently I stripped off and put on only a dressing gown for a dare. It was in the middle of the night, and I went and stood on the landing of the hotel we were staying in, by the lift. When the lift doors opened, I opened the dressing gown, flashed at all the Americans inside and legged it!
Anything you want to add?
Just one question. Do they have bidets in prison?
TOTP VERDICT:
Victoria Addams has a priveleged life, and because of this she thinks she can get away with murder. Although she obviously doesn't look down on those less fortunate than herself, she needs to experience life on the other side!
TOTP SENTANCE:
Victoria should spend one whole week traveling by public transport to work at a laundrette - wearing only the clothes of Waynetta Slob.
TOP SECRET: Posh
When was the first time you can remember doing anything bad?
I used to bully my little cousin and brother when I was younger. I think they were quite scared of me - I don't know why.
When did you first disobey your parents?
When I was about 14, I often had to babysit for my brother. My parents said I couldn't have friends in while they were out, but as soon as their backs were turned all my mates would be round. Looking back, I think they knew but I always tidied up afterwards so they didn't tell me off.
What's the biggest lie you ever told?
When I was ten I told everyone i had really good roller boots and I still had roller skates. So I pretended my roller boots were inside and my mum wouldn't let me wear them out because they were too good. Then one of the neighbours came round and asked to see them. Of course my mum asked, "What roller boots?" and I was rumbled. I never lied after that - I was too embarassed.
Did you ever bunk off school?
Yes, when I was about 13. If I didn't like the lessons I'd hide in the toilets until someone found me or I was bored. If I didn't want to go to school I'd pretend I was sick, but my mum never believed me and always threatened to call the doctor. I'd eat gobstoppers and make my mouth look red and say I had a sore throat.
Have you ever been in a fight?
I used to fight with my cousin really badly. He'd pull my hair and I'd bite his face. I'd also fight with my brother - that's only natural. I was beaten up once, but I've already spoken to TOTP about that.
How hard are you?
Well, if I tense my muscles they're quite hard, heh heh! Actually I'm a big softie. I may look tough, but I'm not. Don't get on the wrong side of me or I'll sort you out!
Have you ever cheated on a boyfriend?
Yes, when I was about 17 or 18. I'd been going out with my boyfriend for two years. It happened when I was at a friend's place and I'd had too much shandy booze. I didn't feel guilty about it afterwards and didn't split up with my boyfriend, well not immediately. Did he find out? No, but if he reads this he'll probably go crazy.
What's the cruellest thing you've ever said?
"Your tops crap!" It was to a little boy who was about seven and was wearing a Man United shirt. I only said it because of the team, and the little boy's face just dropped.
Have you ever not paid a bus, train ot taxi fare?
I never used to pay on the tube, but I have to now - it'd be too embarassing if I was caught. I travelled to London for auditions on a child's fare or without paying. I'd run behind the person in front of me and I'd give a false name and address if I was caught.
Would you snog anyone to get your own way?
No, never. I've never been asked and I don't think anyone would want to snog me anyway.
Have you ever taken the credit for something you didn't do?
When I was at junior school we had to write stories and draw pictures to go with them. I'm really crap at drawing, so I traced out of a book and pretended I'd done it. Everyone thought it was great.
Have you ever made anyone cry?
My mum's the last person I made cry, but that was because she saw the Mama video.
What's the worst punishment you've ever had?
Erm, this was very annoying. I jumped on the stage to dance with Damon at a Blur gig, but the security guard threw me off. I think Damon wanted me to stay on though. And no, I wasn't scared of the guard. Why? Because I have Girl Power, of course!
How quickly can you talk yourself out of a mess?
I'm not too bad at it, but I don't really like telling lies. I prefer not to do something rather than lie about it later.
Have you ever had a run-in with the police?
I don't drive so I've never been pulled over, but I've been in someone elses car when they've been stopped. The car was searched, and ,obviously, they didn't find anything.
What's the naughtiest thing you've ever done?
When I was at college I didn't have a lot of money and if I really wanted something to eat I'd nick it. The canteen had a shutter and you could squeeze your fingers under it and lift it up. When the staff had gone, we'd jump in and rob all the crisps.
Anything you want to add?
No, I have no regrets.
TOTP VERDICT:
Melanie Chisholm has the gift of the gab, even though she doesn't realise it! She must understand that two wrongs don't make a right, so stealing - just because she didn't have any money - is inexcusable. And even worse, she shows absolutely no sign of remorse!
TOTP SENTANCE:
Melanie to a whole season's worth of Manchester United football games and she must always wear their strip when appearing with the Spice Girls.
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I remember sitting in our family car with my brother, Christian, and sister, Louise, when my dad popped into a shop. I took the handbrake off and the car rolled down a hill and into a wall. It was totally smashed up, and when my dad came back I told him Christian had done it. My poor brother was too little to talk at the time, but he carried the blame and until this day I've never told anyone it was really me!
When did you first disobey your parents?
My parents always let me do what I wanted, so there was never any need to disobey them!
What's the biggest lie you ever told?
Before I was a Spice Girl I tried to get work as a dancer. I'd lie about my height and turn up for auditions in high shoes. It didn't really help though, as I'm crap at dancing anyway!
Did you ever bunk off school?
No, because I was too scared. But my mum always wrote me excuse letters for PE, which was a huge relief because all that jumping about used to make my hair go frizzy! The teachers didn't like the fact that I always managed to worm my way out of it, and every day they'd have at me because I'd turn up to school wearing too much make-up!
Have you ever been in a fight?
Once. A girl called Hanna kept laughing at my nose, so I smacked her in the face. It was the only fight I've ever had in my life, and I had the last laugh because years later I went out with her boyfriend!
How hard are you?
Oh dear. Not very hard at all. I win all my battles with my sharp-witted tongue.
Have you ever cheated on a boyfriend?
Erm, no.
Have you ever not paid a bus, train ot taxi fare?
Do you know, all the way through school I used to hear people saying, "Are you busing or footing it?" and I'd think, "What the hell are they on about?" It was only recently that I realised 'busing it' meant catching a bus. Well, you wouldn't have caught me getting on a bus when I was at school. My dad always took me to and from school. I've never done a runner from a taxi either, but I'd like to. If I did it now, the taxi driver would probably sell his story to the papers, so it wouldn't be worth all the aggro!
Would you snog anyone to get your own way?
Definitely not. Unless it was for something like 50 per cent discount on Prada clothes!
Have you ever taken the credit for something you didn't do?
Yes, my make-up. Whenever someone compliments me on it, I always pretend I've done it myself even though I've probably been sitting in a chair with a make-up artist powdering away for two hours!
Have you ever made anyone cry?
Yes, an old boyfriend. He absolutely howled like mad when I dumped him. But he deserved it, he was an idiot!
What's the worst punishment you've ever had?
I was once sent to my room at two o'clock in the afternoon. I can't remember what I'd done, but I was furious that I had so sit up there on my own. Was I allowed to watch TV in there? Oh yes!
How quickly can you talk yourself out of a mess?
The thing about me is that I end up talking myself into situations. Just yesterday we were in a huge hurry and we had to walk past a crowd of kids. Without thinking I stopped to talk to them, and we ended up having to sign about 60 autographs before we could move on!
Have you ever had a run-in with the police?
I was driving around in a posh car and the police stopped me. They thought I was too young to be driving it. But it was mine, so there was no problem.
What's the naughtiest thing you've ever done?
Quite recently I stripped off and put on only a dressing gown for a dare. It was in the middle of the night, and I went and stood on the landing of the hotel we were staying in, by the lift. When the lift doors opened, I opened the dressing gown, flashed at all the Americans inside and legged it!
Anything you want to add?
Just one question. Do they have bidets in prison?
TOTP VERDICT:
Victoria Addams has a priveleged life, and because of this she thinks she can get away with murder. Although she obviously doesn't look down on those less fortunate than herself, she needs to experience life on the other side!
TOTP SENTANCE:
Victoria should spend one whole week traveling by public transport to work at a laundrette - wearing only the clothes of Waynetta Slob.
TOP SECRET: Posh
When was the first time you can remember doing anything bad?
I used to bully my little cousin and brother when I was younger. I think they were quite scared of me - I don't know why.
When did you first disobey your parents?
When I was about 14, I often had to babysit for my brother. My parents said I couldn't have friends in while they were out, but as soon as their backs were turned all my mates would be round. Looking back, I think they knew but I always tidied up afterwards so they didn't tell me off.
What's the biggest lie you ever told?
When I was ten I told everyone i had really good roller boots and I still had roller skates. So I pretended my roller boots were inside and my mum wouldn't let me wear them out because they were too good. Then one of the neighbours came round and asked to see them. Of course my mum asked, "What roller boots?" and I was rumbled. I never lied after that - I was too embarassed.
Did you ever bunk off school?
Yes, when I was about 13. If I didn't like the lessons I'd hide in the toilets until someone found me or I was bored. If I didn't want to go to school I'd pretend I was sick, but my mum never believed me and always threatened to call the doctor. I'd eat gobstoppers and make my mouth look red and say I had a sore throat.
Have you ever been in a fight?
I used to fight with my cousin really badly. He'd pull my hair and I'd bite his face. I'd also fight with my brother - that's only natural. I was beaten up once, but I've already spoken to TOTP about that.
How hard are you?
Well, if I tense my muscles they're quite hard, heh heh! Actually I'm a big softie. I may look tough, but I'm not. Don't get on the wrong side of me or I'll sort you out!
Have you ever cheated on a boyfriend?
Yes, when I was about 17 or 18. I'd been going out with my boyfriend for two years. It happened when I was at a friend's place and I'd had too much shandy booze. I didn't feel guilty about it afterwards and didn't split up with my boyfriend, well not immediately. Did he find out? No, but if he reads this he'll probably go crazy.
What's the cruellest thing you've ever said?
"Your tops crap!" It was to a little boy who was about seven and was wearing a Man United shirt. I only said it because of the team, and the little boy's face just dropped.
Have you ever not paid a bus, train ot taxi fare?
I never used to pay on the tube, but I have to now - it'd be too embarassing if I was caught. I travelled to London for auditions on a child's fare or without paying. I'd run behind the person in front of me and I'd give a false name and address if I was caught.
Would you snog anyone to get your own way?
No, never. I've never been asked and I don't think anyone would want to snog me anyway.
Have you ever taken the credit for something you didn't do?
When I was at junior school we had to write stories and draw pictures to go with them. I'm really crap at drawing, so I traced out of a book and pretended I'd done it. Everyone thought it was great.
Have you ever made anyone cry?
My mum's the last person I made cry, but that was because she saw the Mama video.
What's the worst punishment you've ever had?
Erm, this was very annoying. I jumped on the stage to dance with Damon at a Blur gig, but the security guard threw me off. I think Damon wanted me to stay on though. And no, I wasn't scared of the guard. Why? Because I have Girl Power, of course!
How quickly can you talk yourself out of a mess?
I'm not too bad at it, but I don't really like telling lies. I prefer not to do something rather than lie about it later.
Have you ever had a run-in with the police?
I don't drive so I've never been pulled over, but I've been in someone elses car when they've been stopped. The car was searched, and ,obviously, they didn't find anything.
What's the naughtiest thing you've ever done?
When I was at college I didn't have a lot of money and if I really wanted something to eat I'd nick it. The canteen had a shutter and you could squeeze your fingers under it and lift it up. When the staff had gone, we'd jump in and rob all the crisps.
Anything you want to add?
No, I have no regrets.
TOTP VERDICT:
Melanie Chisholm has the gift of the gab, even though she doesn't realise it! She must understand that two wrongs don't make a right, so stealing - just because she didn't have any money - is inexcusable. And even worse, she shows absolutely no sign of remorse!
TOTP SENTANCE:
Melanie to a whole season's worth of Manchester United football games and she must always wear their strip when appearing with the Spice Girls.
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