Somehow you manage to find a tube of icy hot among the many sex toys cluttering this bastard's bathroom. You unscrew the cap and make you way to the bedside. After unzipping the creature's fly, you are ready to complete your mission. Wait! What the fuck! Where the hell is his dick??? Shit, it must be too tiny (although he always boasted about the 15 foot glow in the darker). Your plan is foiled.

A few seconds later you realize you just boldy went where no many should have ever ventured. Your skin begins to blister and crack!

OH MY GOD! YOU'VE JUST BECOME A HUMAN HERPE!

... AND YOU'RE DEAD!!!

better think twice next time before fondling the genitals of a man who has slept with black women