White Town

No need to worry. White town is still in control. As long as we can keep the kids convinced that Britney Spears is cool then everything should go according to plan. We were worried for a while there in the early 90s though. The kids started getting rebellious. Buying second hand clothes. Listening to abrasive music. It looked like the hardcore was gaining ground. But we took care of that. Same old sex scheme that we used in the 70s. Give us 3 years and a barrage of Jennifer Lopez, Britney Spears and Pamela Andersons and everything was back on track.

Once again we had the kids thinking with their loins. Gone was the loud music and the funny clothes. The kids were back under control of Mom and Dad America. They started shopping at the Gap again. Dance music was back in. Shit, the closest they got to rebellion was raving. They'll never learn. We took their rebellion and slowly but surely turned it back into the thing they were rebelling against.

Lucky we took care of that Cobain guy. He was one of the few characters that might've stood in our way. Some people were against those measures. But hey - not like it would be the first time. Sid Vicious. Abbie Hoffman. John Lennon. Jimi Hendrix. It was a shame about Hendrix. That guy could play some mean guitar. For a nigger of course. But hey - all's fair in love and war and business. I mean, it's a fucking war out there. Every day we do battle for the minds and attitudes of the people. Nowadays it's just the kids we gotta fight for. The adults are so beaten down, we don't even have to worry about them anymore. So long as we keep feeding them their own nostalgia, they won't even blink.

It's just the kids that we've got to worry about. Make sure that they don't get won over. Sure we lose a few. Every couple years there's kids dropping out of school. Kids getting dreadlocks. Kids reading Marx. Kids voting independant. All that bullshit. But they're just a marginal few. As long as they go no further then getting stoned in their basements and working on their zines, then they don't pose any real threat. It's the majority that we gotta focus on. Make sure they keep buying their DMX records instead of Public Enemy. Make sure they imitate Destiny's Child instead of Ani Difranco. Make sure they look up to SmashMouth instead of Jello Biafra. Then everything will be fine. And white town will remain in control.