The Doghouse
A screenplay by:
Blissley Bythewaye's Creator
Fade up from black
Ext: Bus Stop Mid -day
A young man, Garret, walks down a sidewalk in a business area. He carries a bouquet of red roses and a book bag. He comes to a bus stop bench and sits down to wait.
At the bench a mature gentleman, Jason, sits holding a bouquet of roses also. He casually notices Garret as he sits down.
Jason
You in the dog house?
Garret
Yeah
Jason
What did you do?
Garret
Uh. Well. My wife wanted me to go shopping with her…
Jason
You hold her purse?
Garrett
Yeah.
Jason
(nods)
And then…
Garret
She asked me if I thought those pants made her butt look big…
Jason
You didn’t.
Garrett
I did.
Jason
(laughing)
Oh man!
Garrett
Well--- she asked.
Jason
There’s no right answer to that question. Your best bet is to stall and hope a sales person will bail you out. Then excuse yourself and run like hell to power tools where you will be safe.
Garret
Well I wish I had known that.
Jason
Things been pretty rough at home?
Garret
Yeah. She won’t talk to me. She slams doors and drawers. And she keeps the bedroom locked at night.
Jason
Well I’m not so sure roses alone are gonna do the trick.
Garret
Oh I thought of that already!
Garrett reaches in his pocket and pulls out a jewelry case and shows Jason.
Garret
Cubic Zerconia!
Jason looks at the jewelry and then to Garrett and snickers.
Jason
Maybe she’ll cut you some slack for being new at this.
Jason hands the box back to Garrett.
Garret
You think?
Jason
Yeah the combination of the two will get you off the couch.
A few minutes pass.
Garret
What are you in for?
Jason
Me? (laughs) Oh I’m not in the doghouse.
Jason then gets serious faced to deliver his favorite joke.
Jason
In fact I haven’t spoken to my wife in two weeks.
Garret
Really? How come?
Jason
I didn’t want to interrupt her.
Garret
I walked right into that one.
Jason
But really, I’ve had my share of nights on the sofa. When Nancy and I were first married she had her folks over for dinner. She made rolls for the first time. They turned out hard and flat. So after dinner her dad and I took turns skimming them off the pond. That got me a week of cold shoulders.
Garret
What did you do?
Jason
That’s when I discovered that a bouquet of flowers covered a multitude of sins.
Garret
Well I hope they work for me.
Jason
Oh they will. (pause) I also discovered that surprising her with flowers for no reason always had extra benefits for me.
Garrett
Oh yeah?
Jason
(a sly smile)
Oh yeah.
Garret
Oh yeah!
Both men chuckle knowingly.
Jason
So after the kids left home, I just got into the habit of bringing her flowers. (looks to the flowers) I still do.
Garret
Here comes the bus.
Both men stand, gather belongings, get out bus fare and look towards
the right down the street.
Cut to
Ext: Small House Mid day
Garrett carries his roses. He walks down a sidewalk to the front door of a small house. As he fumbles for his keys, the front door opens.
Amanda opens the front door and steps out onto the porch. She
leans up against the house. She wipes her hand on a dishtowel she
holds. Then she folds her arms across her chest.
Amanda
Flowers huh?
Garret
Yeah.
Amanda
Let me guess. The card is to Mrs Fat Ass.
Amanda takes the flowers.
Garret
Oh Amanda. You know I don’t think that.
Amanda
(remains sullen)
Garret
Here. I got you this too. Amanda, I am so sorry.
Garret hands Amanda the box. She looks at it and fingers the jewelry. She looks at him and it is hard to keep from smiling.
Amanda
( reluctantly letting go of her anger)
Oh come on in. I just made my first attempt at rolls. They are just about ready to come out of the oven.
Amanda turns and goes in the house.
Garret pauses to think about what Amanda has said about the rolls.
Garret
You did? They are?
Garret breathes deeply and goes in the house.
Cut to:
Ext: Cemetery Mid-day
Jason carries his roses. He walks over to a cemetery head stone. He stoops, brushed some leaves away and then lays the flowers down. He sits on a marble bench besides the grave.
Fade to black.