I know this letter is a little late. But I wish someone had told you the secrets *I* am gonna share with you now. High school is a 3-4 year endurance test. Most every American, whether they finished or not, has had the High School experience. If you interview everyone of them, I'm quite sure that 99.9% felt unaccepted by someone. I bet some one called them a name, stole their lunch money, wrote obscenities on their locker, pants them in gym class, tripped them in the hall and made fun of their clothes, acne, nose, kinky hair, breasts, butt, name, teeth, ears... etc. I'm sure there were days they hated having to go to school to face the cruelty. I am also willing to bet that these same people belonged to every click: band, jocks, theater, soccer girls, nerds, freaks, chess club, 4H, student government, media club, cheerleaders, drill team, bathroom smokers, wannabes... you name it. Yep, even those kids, the jocks and ethnic types you hated... I bet they had problems too.
But the kicker is that there is a thing called graduation. You get to leave. You aren't sentenced to stay there for life. I'm sure 14-18 seemed like life for you. But me and a host of others who have been there can assure you it is but a short time and becomes largely forgotten as time goes by. Yes, you go to college and there is a more even playing field. You don't have to come in contact with any jocks! You take courses that are in the field you plan to devote your life's work in. You meet others with similar desires. You bond. If you are lucky, you fall in love, not just once but several times!
Then there is this other thing called class reunions. I never felt the need to go to one. But it was great to see how everyone turned out. Actually, it is astonishing. The geeky kid, filled out and that brain of his now earns him a hefty paycheck. The pretty popular homecoming queen got married, had kids and got fat. The drugged out guy asleep in history became a priest. And that jock, the one you despised... he wasn't good enough to play on any college team. He ended up a nobody. It was a good thing his daddy had a car dealership, because he wouldn't have found a job anywhere else. But the nice thing is it doesn't bother you.
It's too late for any of this to dawn on you. If you had just waited one more year, the real world would have opened up. You'd have found that those experiences in high school, both good and bad, had prepared you for the rest of your life. But you flunked out. You couldn't endure. The trouble is you took a whole lot of kids who were really trying with you. You wanted to fit in, but now you will just be remembered with pity.
My heartaches for your parents and the legacy you left them.