May 3, 1999

I wish I could have a penis for one day. It would be interesting to wake up "all ready to go." Then I'd probably go to the bathroom and try the thing out. After a few hours of trying it out, I'd get dressed. I'd be careful not to have an accident with the zipper. With all this testosterone flowing through my body, I'd probably go some where and pick a fight. After I got good and bloody, me and my new buddy could stand on the corner and shout obscenities at women that walked by. Then we could go to a bar and talk to woman's chests. It might be fun to adjust myself in public too. By this time, I'd be getting used to this new appendage. I'd go to the men's department at Sears and see if i really did prefer boxers to briefs. Last of all, I'd go into my boss' office, tell him what I really thought of him and say, "I got your proposal right here!" while grabbing my manly crotch. Yep, that's what I'd do.
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