GIVING THANKS

Christmas is in the air, so it must be Thanksgiving.

This year, as I prepare to partake in the annual feast, I, like you, take pause to give thanks to the things in my life that make my world a happy place.

I am thankful for tryptophan, the magical ingredient in turkey that may or may not exist, but gives me a reason to nap on Thanksgiving. I don’t actually believe there is such thing as tryptophan, but it is a great excuse.I think I will begin to make up other ingredients in other foods with similarly beneficial side effects. “Sorry, honey, I’d love to go shopping, but I had a hamburger for lunch. “You know ground beef contains linksoritum, which causes tightness in the shoulders that can only be alleviated by a swinging motion, as one might perform with, say, a golf club.”

I am thankful for my two children, who remind me that belly busters are, in fact, one of the funniest things on the planet, despite what some co-workers and the Department of Labor seem to think.

I am thankful for my wife, who does a fantastic job raising three children, including one who is in his 30s.

I am thankful for good neighbors, who remind me that there is no substitute for having friends looking out for you.

I am thankful for the NBA, because they remind us that all of the money in the world cannot buy common sense.

I am thankful for Major League Baseball, because it reminds us that even multi-millionaires can remember what playing for love of the game means. Granted, a cool few million doesn’t hurt, but let’s be honest ? Curt Schilling would have gotten paid the same whether he pitched in the World Series or not. I have limped to the plate with a swollen ankle just to get one more at-bat in a church league game. I know what it’s like. Good to know some of the big shots remember it, too.

I am thankful for the Web site www.snopes.com, because it is a champion of truth in a cyberworld of urban legends.

I am thankful the elections are over, because it’s time to focus on what is really important: the 2008 elections.

I am thankful for the movie “Ghostbusters,” because it contains what I feel is, for some odd reason, the best line in movie history: “Listen? you smell something?”

I am thankful for Arthur Blank, because for one of the few times in this Atlanta Falcons fan’s memory, the winter months look bright.

I am thankful for propane, because it makes grilling an everyday possibility.

I am thankful for pigs, cows and chickens, because they make grilling an everyday delight. I am especially thankful for pigs, simply for their diversity. Bratwurst to chops to bacon to ribs? Is there anything it can’t do?

I am thankful for Mel Brooks, who was kind enough to see that my television viewing habits would be focused on kids programming during my years of fatherhood, and took a role in the PBS show “Jakers! The Adventures of Piggly Winks.” Sure, it’s an animated kids show about an Irish pig, but Mel Brooks as a sheep somehow makes it feel as though it’s intended for me.

I am thankful for convenience stores that have lottery-only lines, because there is not much more stress inducing than trying to give a $10 bill for $10 in gas, but having to wait while the person in front of you cashes in $20 in winning scratch-off lottery tickets for $20 more in tickets, and then thinks it is somehow appropriate to scratch off THOSE tickets.

It is my hope that you, too, can take a moment to remember the good things in life during this holiday season. Now, if you’ll excuse me, all of this talk of tryptophan has made me drowsy. I think I need a nap.