On any given day, an Aquarius woman in a long-term relationship wonders what she's doing there. It is not necessarily that she doesn't want to be there. She just doesn't feel completely fulfilled by love. Therefore, on some deep level something always feels missing. What that something is is a freer expression of self.
    Aquarius might be the most difficult sign for a woman to be born in. This is because the transpersonal way of looking at life is far beyond the limited social conditioning of women. Aquarian women are not content with blandly accepting stereotypical role models. They question. They rebel. They seek greater freedom. They search for their ideals in a lot of different ways.
    Nevertheless, they are still women. And as women, they have emotional and sexual needs that seek fulfillment. This is often problematic for a person defined by a great need for freedom and a desire to respect her lover as her friend.
    What usually happens is that Aquarian women compromise. They hook up with a person who is powerful yet very far from perfect. Then they create their own space.
    The ideal structure of an intimate relationship for an Aquarian woman is one in which she only occasionally sees the man. Existing as some sort of shadowy thing in the background, the Aquarian woman's husband goes about his business while she does her thing in life. Aquarian women thrive on being around a lot of different people and are easily suffocated by too much time alone.
    Distant and emotionally detached, she can still be the friendliest of people. However, her desires are personal and not emotional. When the Aquarius woman becomes emotional, it is over someone or something that excites her mind.
    Her mind is restless and overflowing with future projects and plans that promote a sense of greater possibility. Her desire is for love and partnership to become a part of that, not take her away from her pursuits. The feeling of being bound breaks up her energy flow and fills her with a sense of frustration. Consequently, it is not uncommon to find many unattached Aquarian women floating around, trying to sort out their relationship problems in their head.
    It is the Aquarian woman's head which is both her blessing and the bane of her existence. Although frequently brilliant, this woman is also unbalanced in her essential beingness. The more unbalanced she is, the more lonely she can make herself through rigidly pursuing paths which make meaningful emotional connection impossible.
    Aquarian women often embrace extremes and exhibit behavior which takes them away from their feelings. Caught up in group experiences and forming impersonal involvements with many people, their own personhood can get lost or submerged under the goals of the cause or the pressure of the project. Taken too far, in time, she can become cut off and alienated. At this point, it is very difficult for her to see how it all began. The brain of the Aquarian woman often abuses the child within, longing for love and emotionally undernourished by all the ideas it is fed. Aquarian women have a way of wearing out the pavement beneath them before they learn. Consequently they can be the most emotionally exhausting people to help or influence.
    As long as we manage to stay alive, we all have heartbeats as well as brains. Those beats are to maintain our own aliveness. When we exhaust ourselves looking elsewhere, we can lose that vital thread, that middle ground that maintains our sanity. To experience the power of her own womanhood, the Aquarius woman must allow herself to be a woman, to go deeper than her own ideals to the truth of her own feelings which can freeze over in time. Love is a divine mystery. It does not have to be a trap from which you manipulate a clever escape. Emotional-sexual love has a deeper dimension than friendship. It is transformative and potentially very powerful. But first you must open a door within and dwell on the power of that mystery rather than denying its source. The source is one's own heart from which all is reflected. The wise Aquarian woman knows the power of her own heart. And she has learned to hear it above the sound of everything.