The Besz Dispenser - This Week's Rant

For the week of April 3rd, 1998

The Revolution of 1998

Well, Bouchard is at it again - what a shock. Recently, he has stated that he won't hold a referendum until he's sure that he can win it. Yeah, I think that winning the referendum is kinda important I guess. The unfortunate part of this is that he's gotta fool the people of Quebec into hating its country so the entire province will side with him. Then he'll cut the strings and float off into the Atlantic Ocean. However, something tells me that he doesn't see that if he does ship off, he'll sink, not swim. It'll be Titanic 2 early.

I'm so sick and tired of this debate. I find it mildly amusing that in America, this is regarded for treason, which I believe is still an offence punishable by death. Bouchard would be dead right now. But low and behold, the country of Canada is too kind to kill off those who wish to destroy it, so we'll let some pompous judges decide the matter in a court of law. I suppose that is better than a revolution, but it is not exactly a solution to the problem.

What I'd like to know is this - what does it expect to do once it goes? Bouchard cannot expect his newfound "country" to have much backing from other countries, especially ours; most of its revenue is from english-speaking businesses who would leave at the first sign of separation, and the natives are drooling over the territory like they've watched Braveheart one too many times, repeating "It's my island," over and over.

Can a new country survive under all that? The States did it, but that was a few centuries ago. This is not something that happens nowadays, except in the territories once known as Yugoslavia. And they're doing just fine.
So, what is the solution? Well, surprise surprise, I don't know. But I say we say Quebec is no longer a country, then the exact same second, give it all to the Native Americans on all the reserves in Canada. They were here first, and they are truly the most distinct society in the country. All's fair in love and war. And in revolution

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