Season of Terror
by Tigger
Copyright 2002, All Rights Reserved

Chapter 23: A Time to be Reborn

Victoria slipped out of Penny's room and then had to lean against the corridor wall to keep from falling over. *God, I hope I didn't mess that up! As soon as my legs work, I'll go find Michelle and find out the worst.*

"Victoria!" a concerned voice snapped out, "What is the matter?  Are you all right?"

Aunt Jane was suddenly at her side, supporting her senior student's spent frame.  "I'm okay. . .just. . just a bit shaky, is all.  That was dam. . awfully hard. . .umm. . difficult."

"I know it was," Jane said warmly, "Michelle and Erica are cautiously optimistic now. But you did it nonetheless, and you did it superbly - with one exception."

"Exception?" Victoria yelped, trying to pull herself to her feet.  "I KNEW I messed something up.  What did I do?  How can I fix it?"

Jane felt the girl reel again and held her grip. "I'll tell you after I see to Penny, but first, let's go find you a place to sit down before you fall down.  I'll have Marie bring you a snack while you wait."

"O. . . okay, Aunt Jane."

~------------~

Sitting on her bed, dressed in a cotton flannel nightgown, Penny scratched her head as she stared at the still-blank journal that pretty Doctor Nash had given her. She was supposed to 'reflect' on how she felt about the incident at the beauty parlor so that she could then discuss it with Dr. Nash and the other one, Dr. Davis.  

One of the problems she was having with that task was that she'd completely lost track of time.  There were a few very clear memories - that awful Sandy woman, Victoria protecting her, Victoria again, this time in Penny's room first admitting that she was also a boy and then chewing her out for being SELFISH.  The memories were just there, all jumbled together with no sense of time to set them apart from one another.  It was like those events happened one right after another, with no time between any of them.

Except that, according to Ms. Jane, the beauty parlor trip had been four days ago, and the confrontation with Victoria had been two days ago.  The wonders of modern medical science.

The sound of a key rasping in her door lock had her setting the journal aside.  She looked up just in time to gape in shock at who entered.  "Victoria?" she asked.

"Yes'm," the girl replied as she entered the room.
  
"What is THAT?!?!" Penny asked, eyes wide with disbelief.

'That' was a full up, floor length, historically-accurate Victorian housekeeper's dress done in traditional black bombazine.  From wrist to throat to floor, Victoria was covered in the heavy black material.  It was topped by a starched cotton apron and with a white mobcap.

"I'm being taught a needed lesson, Mum," Victoria said shamefaced as she set the tea tray down on Penny's bedside table.

"For what?"

"Umm, well, Aunt Jane heard us yelling at each other - you know - when I brought you that food two days ago?"

"That's for YELLING at me?  Good heavens, Victoria, I yelled at you first."

Victoria blushed bright pink.  "She, ah, heard me use very unladylike language, and she is using this to remind me that I am always accountable for my behavior.  I am getting a crash course in remedial ladylike behavior."

"She hasn't punished me."

"I wasn't impaired, and was therefore expected to keep control of my tongue.  I'd be careful from now on, were I you.  I don't think Jane would let you off now."

"But, but why THAT?"

Victoria giggled.  "Goodness, back then, you couldn't even admit that a lady had 'legs' - they were 'limbs' instead.  That's why they had to wear huge skirts that buried their . . . um, maidenly virtue beneath yards and yards of heavy skirts.  The ultimate in demure femininity, don't you think?"

"You don't mind?"

"Well, the corset and period underwear are a bitc. . .um, are bothersome.  Marie took three more inches off my waist lacing me up this morning so breathing is a challenge.  Not to mention that the unmentionables, the starched pantilettes, wool stockings and muslin chemise, ITCH and ladies do NOT scratch," Victoria said with some asperity before giggling again.  "Sure does remind me to act like a lady, though.  Kind of hard to forget, if you know what I mean."

"Hell yes, I mean, goodness, yes."

"That's a freebie, Penny," Victoria told her seriously. "Please try to curb that language.  If you start, I might forget and get my time in this outfit extended.  At least it's not August.  I couldn't handle this if it the weather was still hot."

"Serves you right.  Lord knows I got the lecture on bad language when I got here - and needed it.  I'm glad to see that Miss Jane's and Miss VICTORIA'S standards apply to everyone."

"I was sort of hoping you wouldn't remember that," Victoria mumbled, blushing even more vividly.  "I don't suppose you could just chalk this up as an opportunity to learn from someone else's mistake?"

"Okay. Umm, Victoria?"

"Yes, Penny?"

"Thank you.  For standing up for me with that Sandy person, and. . " she took a deep breath, "And for telling me the truth as you saw it the other day."

"What are you going to do?"

"Well, the first thing I'm going to do is go to the bathroom.  No way I can drink any of that tea until I, ah, make some room.  Wait for me?  I need to talk to you if you have time."

"Sure," Victoria smiled.  "According to Aunt Jane, I am your maid for the time being, anyway."

~------------~

Victoria was setting out the tea when a soft sound from the bathroom caught her attention.  It was a sound she'd heard often enough to recognize recently - it was the sound of someone crying.
Hurrying as quickly as her restrictive garb permitted, she rushed to the door and knocked.  "Penny? Are you all right?  May I come in?"  The last question was for form, because none of the doors in a student's room could be locked.

The door opened and a red-eyed Penny stood there, looking forlorn.  Victoria went to her and embraced the taller girl, letting her cry.

~-----------~

"MIKE? Get ready to go in there," Erica Davis ordered.  "We may have a situation here.  Penny just broke down and I have no idea why!"

Michelle pulled on her white lab coat and moved to get a good look at the monitor.  "What happened?"

"Victoria went in there in Jane's punishment gown.  They talked about it and then Penny went to the bathroom.  Next thing I know, Victoria is pounding on the bathroom door, it opens and Penny's a basket case again."

"You think she's reacting to Victoria's discipline?"

"I have no idea, pal.  I didn't see anything that would have indicated that before she went to the head."

"Okay," Michelle donned a ear-plug radio.  "I'm wired.  I'll be outside her door, ready to go in when you give the word."

"I'll call Jane," Erica said, reaching for the intercom switch.

~--------------~

"It. . .it just struck me, you know?  I saw myself in the mirror."

"And?"

"I'm so . . . so ugly.  I thought of . . of the things I said to Janey, and how they fit me so much better than they ever fit her."

"Umm, I suspect, Penny, that after what happened, if you were to tell Jane that you can't handle being Penny, she'd let you go back to Benny.  The transformation to Penny was something to help you deal with your memories, not make them harder for you.  You want me to go get you some jeans and a t-shirt until we can talk this out with Jane?" *Thank you, Michelle, for anticipating something like this.  Fortunately, a complete 'boy' wardrobe in Benny's sizes is just down the hallway.*

"NO!" Penny sobbed out before muffling her next words in Victoria's apron-covered shoulders.  "Ms. Thompson was. . was right. I. . .I need to understand what Janey went through, if I can, so that I can do what you said - help others like she wasn't helped.  But it's going to be so hard looking like. . . like I do."

Victoria let her eyes go closed in momentary relief, then patted the still-sobbing girl on her back.  "Hey, you think I was always this beautiful?" she teased.  "You just haven't had the advantage of several months of, ah, intensive training by Jane Thompson and Tante Marie.  Heavens, you've been here only a couple of weeks.  Want me to show you some tricks?  I'm pretty good with hair and makeup, although not nearly in Marie's class."

"With what?" Penny asked, gesturing at the empty vanity table where once just about every cosmetic known to woman had once resided.

"Oh, I can go get some stuff - if you're up for it.  Heck, I could see if Tante Marie is free.  She's been really worried about you, too."

"Okay.  If you don't think she'd mind."

"Just wait.  I'll be right back."

~-------------~

Jane watched as Victoria hurried out of the room and Penny went to stand in front of the vanity.  She picked up the intercom and dialed the kitchen.  "Marie? Victoria has gotten Penny to agree to a dress-up session.  She needs you up there right away. Make her shine, okay?  She's seeing her dead friend whenever she looks at herself in the mirror.  Thanks."  She put the phone back in the cradle and sighed.  "Now what?" she asked Erica.

"We watch and wait.  It's all we can do."

~-----------~

Victoria, Jane and Marie sat on the bed and watched as Penny examined herself in the mirror.  Her hair was up in a simple ponytail, but had been brushed to a lustrous chestnut and teased into fullness.  Marie's cosmetic artistry had added depth and a hint of mystery to the eyes that were Penny's best facial feature, had filled out the thin-lipped mouth and had highlighted her pale cheeks with just a touch of color.  Jane had personally wielded the razor on her student's face while a cream depilatory had smoothed out the long legs.  Faux nails with a shell-pink enamel brought an unexpected elegance to her slim hands. The simple pastel blue dress showed off her slim figure to perfection.

*She's not truly pretty,* Jane thought objectively, *but she's slender enough, her face is . . .interesting with a clear complexion, and those legs will draw the eye provided we play them up well.  More than enough, I think, for us to work with.  She'll do, and quite nicely, in fact.  Now, if we can just get her to see that.*

"You look GREAT, Penny." Victoria cheered.

"You're much prettier," the flat voiced replied.

"And so she is," Jane said briskly.  "But she has advantages, both natural and trained, that you don't.  The former is luck,"

"Bad luck, if you ask me," Victoria put in pertly and earning a shy smile from Penny.

"Which no one did, Miss," Jane said sternly, at the same time surreptitiously squeezing Victoria's arm approvingly, "And you will wear that so-very-ladylike outfit for another two days for interrupting me. As I said, Penny, our Victoria has natural gifts that make the masquerade easier for her, but the skills to make the most of what you have are things she knows and you have yet to learn.  She is right, however, you do look very nice right now.  Don't you agree?"

"I'm very tall," Penny protested.

"So are super-models," Jane replied.  "Understand this, Penny.  I've done this with boys in the past, and very few of them turned out as pretty as this one.  As for you, you're not as attractive as some, more attractive than many.  You'll carry this off easily enough if you give it your full attention and effort.  Looks are only a small part of being perceived as a woman when in public.  Manners, mannerisms and attitude are far more important than mere looks."

"And you think I can do it?"

"I know you can do it, if that is what you want."

"It was part of our deal, wasn't it?"

"Yes, it was, but I am not going to hold you to that deal.  Sandy's behavior endangered you, even though that was not her intent.  I think you've made a transition since then.  I believe that I can help you whether you are Penny or Benny.  That said, it would be better if you came to those training and learning experiences I plan for you without reservations.  If you have reservations about continuing to live as Penny, as a result of your experiences at the Marisha Chalet, then let's discuss them."

"And if I say I can't handle this - being Penny - anymore?"

"If you say that, and mean that, then you will be Benny again within the hour, and we will structure your program for that contingency."

"Which do you think would be. . .I don't know, better?  More effective?"

Jane smiled sadly.  "I can't answer that, my dear.  I have preferences, but only you can decide how you really feel.  You are very different from the other boys I have done this program with, and therefore, what made my program effective with them may not apply with you.  If you fight me every step of the way, that helps neither of us."

"I see.  When do I have to decide?"

"Not right away.  Dr Nash and Dr Davis want to work with you a bit more, first.  You should probably discuss this with them before reaching any decisions.

"What about that beauty parlor?  And that Sandy woman?"

Jane shrugged.  "Not much point taking Benny there, is there?  As for Penny? Well, we'll play that by ear, but I doubt there's much there for you to learn now.  If that is the only reason not to be Penny, and if there are reasons for you to be Penny, then we won't go to the Chalet.  This is about helping you, Penny.  As for Sandra?  I understand that Dr. Nash has told you her reasons for her behavior.  Be that as it may, she's no longer a part of my program." And there was an awful finality to Jane's voice.  "Now, you must excuse me as I have some calls to make.  If you need me, Victoria will know where to find me."

"I must prepare dinner," Marie said, and rose to follow Jane.

"Well, I know you used your deodorant," Victoria said snippily.  "I guess mine must be wearing off the way those two cleared out of here."

"Just as well," Penny said, yawning.  "I'm suddenly very tired."

Victoria was up in a flash. "Oh, I'm sorry. Here, let me help you out of those things so you can lay down."

Minutes later, Penny came out of the bathroom, again in her nightgown, with her face cleansed of Marie's makeup.  She saw that the bed had been turned down and that all the makeup was again on the mobile cart that Victoria had wheeled into her room a couple of hours earlier.

The senior student saw her little sister's pensive look and blushed.  "I'm sorry, Penny, but Jane said that I had to take them back until. . well, until. . "

"I understand, Victoria," Penny said solemnly.  "Until she is more certain of my commitment to atone for what I did.  That's fine."

~------------~

Erica watched as the two girls said their goodbyes.  She was encouraged when Penny specifically made the effort to clasp hands with Victoria before getting into her bed.  It was the first gesture of what might be affection she had seen her patient offer another.  Things were looking up.

~-----------~

Victoria closed Penny's door behind her and carefully checked the hall.  Once she was certain she was alone, she looked at the thing Penny had covertly pressed into her hand.

It was a wadded up piece of paper - a note.  Quickly, she smoothed out the paper and scanned the message.  Then she groaned.

~---------~

"Dr. Davis?" Victoria called from the door.  "May I speak with you, please?"

"Sure, Vic.  C'mon in.  What's up?"

"You know Jane told me to do whatever was necessary for Penny's recovery?"

"Yes, I do.  So?"

"So this," the girl said, holding out a badly wrinkled sheet of paper.  "Penny palmed that to me just as I left.  In it, she asks me not to tell Jane.  Now I am well and truly stuck."

Erica read the note, and carefully considered the possibilities.  "Keep faith with Aunt Jane or with your little sister, eh?"

"That's about it.  I can't see how to do both."

"Let me talk to Michelle and see what she thinks.  Then I'll get back to you, okay?  If it becomes necessary to bring Jane into this, I will do it, and make sure that Penny understands that it was my doing, not yours.  That it was a medical decision all the way, which in fact, is precisely what it is in this case."

"Thanks, Dr. Davis."

"Erica, dear, at least, when we're alone.  After all, I'm just another of Jane's boys, too."