Season of Terror
by Tigger
Copyright 2002, All Rights Reserved

Chapter 22: A Time to Grow

Victor did stay, but as Victoria.  Michael, she was surprised to discover, was the same doctor who had taken her blood donation, Dr. Michael Nash.  He was ALSO both a former student and semi-adopted son of one Jane Thompson.

Not only that, but he made one heck of cute blonde as Michelle.  Drop dead gorgeous, in fact.  Victoria had initially been a little upset by the discovery of Michael/Michelle's connection to Aunt Jane.  Since Michael and Nora had already been in on Jane's little secrets, that meant Victoria's 'courageous revelation' at the clinic had really not in any way endangered to Victoria's future reputation.  She'd been moping about that, and feeling more than a little guilty for those feelings, until Jane, being Jane, had set things straight.

"Courage, my dear, is being afraid and facing what you fear without backing down.  You had EVERY reason to be afraid at the clinic.  Whether the threat was real or not, you were certain that is was authentic, as I intended.  I said I was proud of you, did I not?"

And that had been that.  Jane did not lie about such things. In fact, Jane did not lie. *She simply fails to tell the whole truth or tells the truth in a deceptive way when it suits her purposes or plans for a student's education,* Victoria realized.

Dr. Eric Davis, clinical psychologist, was also now in residence, but his arrival did nothing to change the totally feminine environment of Seasons House.  The good doctor was yet *another* of Jane's 'boys' who had at one time been one of Jane's 'girls'.  If Erica wasn't QUITE as cute as Michelle, she was still a fox, but then, Victoria had recently discovered within herself a partiality to tall, sleek redheads.  Especially since her alter ego, Victor, had come under Aunt Jane's guidance.

Seasons House remained a bastion of the gentler sex because the two doctors felt that the presence of men in the house might be more threatening to their patient. So, after consulting with Michael's "Momma-Jane" upon their arrival, both had quickly and easily changed into their female personas.  Penny's round-the-clock suicide watch was back, but now there were trained professionals watching the patient in addition to the ladies of Seasons House.  Essentially, the plan was that Jane, Marie and Victoria would interact with Penny as before, while Michael and Eric kept her under surveillance using Jane's monitors and security cameras.

It was a plan that worked well enough, until that is, one day about a week after the abortive trip to the Marisha Chalet.

~-----------~

Victoria felt a sharp edge of excitement curl through her gut as she entered Penny's room.  The room, which had been barren of bric-a-brac before, and which had some of the strangest furnishing and design touches Victoria had ever seen (those windows with the steel mesh inside were downright ugly) had been given a ruthless going over by the two doctors.  Things she'd never have thought could be used as weapons, like the heavy satin comforter, the thick wall curtains and the vanity stool had been removed along with every bottle, pot and tube. *Heavens,* she thought still amazed, *They went so far as to take Penny's toothbrush away, giving it to her only after eating and then taking it back again after use.*

Even the food and 'serving set' she carried on her tray were special 'suicide-proof' selections.  There were no utensils at all - everything was finger food - something which Marie had taken as a personal challenge to her powers in the kitchen.  Lunch was a salsa-laced salad wrapped in a flour tortilla, soft steak tacos and a rice and bean burrito. Beverages were delivered in unbreakable sealed cups, much like the safety cups designed for cars, but with no straws and no sharp edges.  Dessert was a selection of fruit, cookies and cheese nibbles.

Penny had taken to living in underwear since returning from the salon.  With her hair now long, but unkempt, her face devoid of any cosmetics and an obviously boy's body, she was not a pretty sight. *Odd that I still think of her in the feminine tense,* the petite brunette thought, *Guess I really am fully indoctrinated into the 'Aunt Jane Method' as Michelle calls it.  Penny's in panties so Penny's a girl. Simple as that.*

'The girl' stared balefully at Victoria, hurt and anger sparking in the dark-circled eyes. *Well, if Michelle is to be believed, that is a positive sign.  At least she's not ignoring me.* 

"Luncheon is served, m'lady," Victoria said cheerfully.

Penny did not immediately respond, but did get up off the bed and come over to stand face-to-face with the other girl.  She simply stared at the smaller girl; examining her with the focus and detachment of an entomologist examining a particularly new and rather disgusting dung beetle speciman.  It took the cumulative grace and composure built by hours of Jane Thompson exercises for the senior student to simply stand there and not flinch under the tall girl's scrutiny.  Finally, even her patience reached its limits.  

"Its impolite to stare," she said quietly.

Penny stared for a moment longer, just to show how little Victoria's reproof had meant to her, before saying her first, unforced words in over a week.  "You told that bitch you were a boy."

~-----------~

"ERICA," Michelle Nash called out from the surveillance station hidden in Jane's private apartments, "JANE!".  The call awoke the psychologist who was sleeping on a nearby cot, and brought Jane hurrying in from the private office she kept in her suite.  "I think it's show time," she said when the other two arrived.  "Penny just more or less asked Victoria if she's a boy or a girl."

"Victoria knows what to say," Erica said quietly as she slipped in beside Michelle.  "Let's just hope Penny is ready to listen."

"I still don't like this idea," Jane muttered as she, too, took a seat in front of the desktop monitors.  "Even if it works, there's no guarantee she'll do anything more than simply go through the motions of 'doing the right thing'."

"AT least she will be alive to go through the motions, Aunt Jane," Erica said quietly. "Trust me, if she dies, we lose for certain.  With these types of trauma, the only guarantee is that you can't possibly win if the victim is no longer alive to be helped." 

"I want Benny to be happy!" Jane growled.

"Easy, Momma-Jane," Michelle soothed.  "So do we, okay?" 

"And if this grand scheme fails?" Jane demanded archly, aware that she was being unreasonable but unable to help that reaction.  Benny was one of HERS, by god. "I won't have him institutionalized."

Erica stifled a sigh.  What did she expect from Aunt Jane? The word 'quit' wasn't even in her dictionary. "He'll be more of a danger - to himself - here than at the hospital.  Do you think you'll be able to help him as much as they can? It will take long-term, high-intensity treatment, by specialists. 

"I'll bring them here." she retorted.

Michelle put her hand on Jane's.  "Momma-Jane, you know better than that. What about group therapy sessions?  That's a major and effective tool - particularly with young people with her. . .his problem.  Do you honestly think you could bring all the other patients here, too?"

"I'll turn the bloody manor into a center for young people like Benny," she muttered, aware that she actually half-way meant just that.

"Shhhh!" Erica hissed.  "I have to be able to hear what's said!"

~------------~

"You told that bitch you were a boy."

Victoria took a deep breath, set down the tray and mentally told herself, *It's show-time, folks!* 

"Did I?  I think what I said to her was something to the effect that 'Are you going to tell them that I am really a boy under this little disguise?'.  I never really said that I was a boy."

"Are. . . you. . . a boy?" Penny ground out each word.

For a long moment, the shorter brunette only stared back at the tall, nearly nude figure before her, then she shrugged.  "Before I came here, my name was Victor, not Victoria."
   
"Are you here for something . . . something like. . like what I did?  Is that why you're dressing and acting like that?"

"More or less.  I was a bully - a real bastard who would go hurt kids, little kids smaller than me, because I didn't have the guts to go after the people who were actually messing with me."

"Why the skirts then?"

Victoria giggled nervously.  "Well, it's pretty hard to beat somebody up in a skirt and not draw attention to yourself, if you know what I mean.  Jane likes to say it makes me stop and think before making a knee-jerk decision.  Kind of like what you tried to do back in the hospital - make a real stupid decision that doesn't solve the problem because you didn't think it through completely."

A vivid flush suffused Penny's face and torso at Victoria's words, and.  "Janey died, you bitch, because of ME! Because of the awful things I SAID to her, okay?" Penny snarled, emphasizing each word by poking her index finger into Victoria's chest.  "Don't tell me about stupid decisions.  I already KNOW!"

Her own temper beginning to light, Victoria pushed her little sister back a step with a double hand shove.  "Look, Penny, what you did to this Janey was wrong, all right?  We can all AGREE on that, but at the same damned time, I think she was stupid to kill herself over it.  Besides, this is NOT about her.  This is about YOU.  Why are you so damn selfish? 

That question brought the taller girl up short and for a moment, she gaped.  "Selfish? What the hell does that mean?  I hate myself, but that has nothing to do with being selfish.  What the hell do I have to be selfish about?"

"Good question, but so far, everything you've said? It's been all about you.  You're willing to do whatever it takes to be the center of attention, to make others around you spend all their damn time thinking about you.  You're so wrapped up in yourself you don't give a shit what you're doing to those around you." 

"If I just died," Penny stormed back, really starting to lose control now, 'Then no one would have to worry about me, would they?  How is THAT selfish.  I am FREEING them."

"Oh for shit's sake.  Are you really that stupid or are you fucking working at it?  Hellooo!  You think Aunt Jane would just throw a little dirt on your coffin and walk away? Cripes, Penny, you've gotten to know her yourself in the past few weeks or so. It would *kill* that lady if a student in her care offed himself.  Maybe not physically, but something very important inside her would die, and she for damn sure would never, ever forgive herself. And a bunch of other kids like ME and yes, like YOU will have lost their chance to crawl up out of the mess they are making of their lives because she won't trust herself to help another kid. And while we're at it, I met your parents, okay? You think they feel the same way as Aunt Jane? Damn straight they do, pal.  Hell, *you* feel the same way about Janey!  Don't try to tell me that killing yourself wouldn't hurt anyone else because we both know that's BULLshit!"

Penny started to open her mouth, but the furious Victoria cut her off before she could get a word in.  "And more than that, you have a lot of life left ahead of you.  You could do a lot of *good* out there, if you set your mind to it.  As far as I'm concerned, if you have that capacity and don't use it, then you are just as responsible for every kid in the future you could have helped who kills himself, or starves to death, or gets hooked on drugs, or just plain suffers through a miserable life, as you are for that one girl in the past.   Get off your fuckin' ass, girl, and TRY to add enough value to the world to make up for whatever you've taken away.  You *owe* us, Penny!"

"Oh, and just what the hell does being her wearing these stupid dresses have to do with that supposed debt, what did you say your name was?  Victor?"

"Victoria will do right now, thank-you-very-much.  The dresses have NOTHING to do with that as you damned well know, Penny.  They're on the outside and Jane did that to help you - to give you some emotional distance from the guy you thought you were.  What you do for others you'll do because of something on the inside.  Call it heart.  Call it guts.  Call it whatever the hell you want, but call on it!  A friend of mine told me that it's what's inside you that tells you to keep going when everything outside tells you to quit. Don't quit, Penny. Don't you EVER fucking quit! Start making things right for a change!"

As quickly as it had flashed, the temper went out of the taller student's eyes, and she slumped wearily into a nearby chair.  "Janey's dead, damn you," she almost whimpered, "I can't make that right."

"Then dammit, make it BETTER," Victoria hissed intensely.  "Make something, ANYTHING better than it is because you are here. Start seeing OTHERS' needs instead of your wants for a change."
    
"You're awfully damned cold-blooded all of a sudden.  Aren't you supposed to change my mind for me?" 

Victoria tossed her head defiantly and shot a disgusted look at her fellow student.  "How am I gonna do that?  It's your mind.  You know that killing yourself is a fucking stupid thing to do.  It's also fucking selfish.  I don't think you're that stupid, and you've got no right to be that fucking selfish.  Oh, the hell with it!  I tried." and with that, the furious brunette swept out of the room.

~-----------~

The three eavesdroppers watched in silent fascination as the diminutive brunette went nose-to-chest with the tall boy-girl, lashing out with words and emotions that seemed to charge the very air.

"Goodness," Jane finally managed.  "Was that my cowardly bully in there?"
"Bully, maybe," Michelle chuckled softly, "At least I'm sure Penny thinks so, but cowardly?  Lord above, the only time she could get nose-to-nose was when Penny sat down.  That's one tough big sister you've got there, Momma-Jane."

"I'll say.  Now. . " Whatever Erica was about to say was interrupted by a wail of unmitigated anguish coming through the speakers.  As one, Jane, Michelle and Erica turned back to the monitors and saw Penny, seated in her chair, weeping.

"That's it for now," Erica murmured. "Her adrenalin-rush just petered out and she's crashing from the residual traces of the sedatives we had to administer.  At least Victoria got through the whole scenario before Penny hit the wall."

"Thank god," Michelle breathed. 

Erica sighed softly.  "Don't be too thankful yet, Mike, because we don't know yet WHY she's crying.  But at least we know that she wasn't unmoved by Victoria's little speech."

"There's hope?" Jane asked as she prepared to go in to see to her student.  Even now, she almost afraid to hope.

"There's hope," the two doctors said in unison.

"Michelle and I will start some one-on-one therapy sessions with her just as soon as she regains some composure.  We'll know more after we talk with her, but there is hope now.  Go take care of your student, Jane.  The two of us will start when the sedatives have completely worn off."