10. No one will kill you for not drinking beer.

9. Beer doesn't tell you how to have sex.

8. Beer has never caused a major war.

7. They don't force beer on minors who can't think for themselves.

6. When you have beer, you don't knock on people's doors trying to give it away.

5. Nobody's ever been burned at the stake, hanged, or tortured to death over his brand of beer.

4. You don't have to wait 2,000+ years for a second beer.

3. There are laws saying that beer labels can't lie to you.

2. You can prove you have a beer.

1. If you have devoted your life to beer, there are groups to help you stop.

10. Charles Manson Faith conferences

9. Watching other satanists get confused when they try to invert a Star of David

8. They know what's going to happen to OJ.

7. The Satanic Bible can be purchased on audio cassette now.

6. Always gets first dibs on Brimstone for their bar-b-q's

5. New vibrating mattress installed in all ritual sex coffins.

4. Special "900" number phone line..."Dial a Temptation"

3. Royalty payments from Betty Crocker for use of the word "Devil's Food"

2. Slim Whitman radio..all day..all night And the number 1 reason it's cool to be a satanist....

1. When you tell someone to go to Hell...it's a good thing