I suppose it's been about a year since I wrote "Stop Smoking Therapy." I said I would keep everyone updated, which is probably why I haven't put anything new on this site. I started smoking again.
I've quit smoking about three times since and I imagine I've said, "I'll quit tomorrow, or Saturday, or some other date" about 30 times (if not more). I decided that one day I'd just quit. That's the best way to do it. You wake up one morning, or maybe it's after the third cigarette of the day, and you say, "Yuck, I don't want to do this anymore." The sticks go in the trash and you've quit. That's how I quit on my most successful attempt, which lasted three years. Since then, I haven't made it past three weeks.
My problem now is that I don't have those days. I keep saying tomorrow, or beyond. So now I'm trying yet another approach. It's a rather informal program that gives you two weeks to plan for the big quit day. I've planned this far ahead before without success, but this one has something you do each day to prepare.
Day One, Pick a quit date. That's quite simple. Day Two, Write down the reasons you want to quit and Day Three, Write down why you're afraid to quit. Neither of those are a problem. Day Four, Note each time you reach for a cigarette and plan what you're going to do instead. Ahh, it's becoming a bit more challenging.
My day begins with a steaming cup of coffee and a trip to the patio. I enjoy the early morning quiet, cool air and my first (delightful) cigarette of the day. I think about my schedule and check out the progress of the patio garden. Sometimes, I stay for a second smoke.
What's my plan now? Grab a cup of coffee and wish I had a cigarette, I guess. Don't give me that, "Have tea instead." Tea doesn't work. Bad enough I have to give up my cigarettes, don't even try to take my coffee.
I thought about beginning the day with a quick walk around the block, but I can't do that without coffee first. I thought about putting coffee in a to-go cup and going for a walk. Hmm. Think I'll worry about that one later.
The next part of the day takes me into my office where I check my email and then go over my notes for the day. I'm reaching for a cigarette. What am I going to do? I had this brilliant idea yesterday to take some straws and cut them up. I thought I'd put them in a little dish on my desk and grab those. So, I wrote that on my notes. "I'm going to grab a straw and stick it in my mouth."
By noon I had a list a mile long that either said, "Deal with it later," or "Grab a straw." This is a very well laid out plan. There's always the celery sticks and hard candy, but food makes me want a cigarette. That's why I put "Deal with it later," when I noted that I want a cigarette after I eat. What the heck am I going to do?
I love some of the suggestions the program has for alternatives. Things like, Go to the movies. Oh, yes, that's a great option. I've got a proposal due in two hours, I'll go to a movie. Although, if I did that, I wouldn't get any more work and some of the stress that makes me want a cigarette would be gone. However my "No money stress" would be increased. That was another suggestion: Avoid stress during the first two weeks of quitting. I.E. Control the World. Yes, I can do that.
I really don't want to quit smoking. I want to be a non-smoker. I want to wake up one day and hate cigarettes. Hate the smell, not be able to tolerate even a small puff. I want to think people look disgusting when they smoke. Oh well, back to the program.
What's my to-do item for tomorrow? Find a support group. That's interesting. Maybe a support group could help me with today's list. Seeking assistance from a group of grumpy ex-smokers could be entertaining. I ask, "What sorts of things can I do instead of smoking?" And they say, "I don't give a #*/?-. I've got my own */%# problems." (Actually, I've visited a few Stop Smoking newsgroups and the folks seem to be overly cheery. I've started to think many of them have simply substituted one addiction for another.)
Do I seem negative? Just wait until I actually quit. On that note, I'm reaching for a cigarette.