The next couple paragraphs were meant to be on yesterday's entry. However, I was in the back of the office gossiping with Tony until it was time to go home, so they didn't get put up. Office gossip is a horrible, horrible vice.
I just read about that 12-year-old girl in Dumfries who tied her newborn baby up in a trashbag and put her out with the trash. That makes me feel vaguely ill. What is a twelve-year-old getting pregnant for? Obviously, she wanted to get laid, and the easy answer is that kids are starting younger and younger. When I was twelve (or, for all I know, she actually conceived when she was 11), I admit that I had an almost preternatural interest in sex. But I don't think I actually pictured myself having sex until I was at least sixteen or seventeen. (Rather a good prediction, actually). I had crushes, mind you. But sex? I didn't know anyone in 7th grade that was having sex.
We just won't discuss the fact that she threw the kid in the trash. She's basically a child, and children are incredibly self-absorbed, as well as having little empathy. She was probably scared, too. I'm not saying that what she did is excusable. I mean, she'd carried the kid for nine months already, everyone knew, or at least suspected she was pregnant. She'd even told some friends at school that she was pregnant. How did she expect to get away with this? What faulty reasoning led her to this course of action?
The most disturbing thing of all is that Dumfries isn't that far from where I live. Just a ten minute trip on I-95.
C– is in Minnesota, of all places, at the moment. I sent the letter I wrote him on my disgustingly cute Hello Kitty stationary a few days ago.
Last night was relaxing. From the time I got home, until about 10:30 at night, I watched Daria reruns. I love Daria. I hate liking something so trendy, though.
Am I the only one who feels this way? I get utterly disgusted by the way some people slavishly follow pop culture. Sometimes I go out of my way to dislike something simply so that I'm not following a trend. Most of the time, though, it's not hard to hate what's popular. Most people have crap for taste, so T.V. shows and music that's currently all the rage is usually utter garbage. Like Dawson's Creek. The last time I watched Dawson's creek, I thought I was going to retch. My life has never been that over-emotional. Same with Touched by an Angel. Except that's very obviously a program promoting Christianity, as well.
I like Daria. That would have been me in High School if I hadn't been so...ugh.
So, I watched that, called Dirk at 8:30 because the house was empty and I got lonely. Then, apparently, watching all that T.V. rotted my brains. After the Daria run, my eyes were running and itching from allergies, and I went to take some allergy medication. Well, I looked at the stuff, and immediately thought of all those morning glory seeds I'd painstakingly collected last summer. I thought of all the great things those seeds were supposedly going to do for me. I decided to try them out.
So, I ground up about ten grams, soaked them in water, and drank the water (just like the book said). I think I was supposed to eat the water-soaked seeds, as well. However, the taste of the water was enough to make my stomach do backflips. I just knew the seeds wouldn't stay down. It was kind of acid-flavored, with a really bitter aftertaste. (Gee, no shit. This is, after all, lysergic acid we're talking about). Maybe I should have mixed it with kool-aid.
I got online for a few minutes, then had to get off because of a headache. I retreated to my room, so that if anything interesting happened I wouldn't be stumbling around the house. I sat on my bed and stared at the HR Giger poster I have up opposite of my bed. I became convinced that the woman's head was going to crawl off that poster in a second, supported by the tentacles coming out of it like a spider. (BTW, the woman's face did, indeed have tentacles coming out of it. That wasn't a product of my mind)
I considered, momentarily, the utter horror of having that woman's face crawl up to me on those tentacles and sit on my legs. I wondered if I would scream, and if so, how loudly I'd scream. I saw the woman's eyes move, as though she was looking around the room. I saw the walls blur a little. I got up and decided to turn the poster so that it faced the wall, and I wouldn't have to look at it anymore. I painstakingly did that, even though it seemed I couldn't get the coordination right to push the pins in easily.
Then, I sat back down. The walls were still a little blurry, but that was about it. What a gyp. Nothing interesting at all. Perhaps if I'd been able to eat the seeds themselves...but no more experiments along those lines for a while. I used up most of the seeds, and the rest I need to plant more next spring.
Don't whine at me about the dangers of drug use. I researched this stuff. Nothing bad would have happened.
Today, I have officially started my diet. The kickoff was getting the box of chocolates my parents got me and bringing it to work. I then removed the lid, and left the box in a prominent place (Claire's desk). There's an interesting study in willpower, if you can manage it. People have been complaining about "whoever put this box here" even as they're stuffing their faces.
Cathy (who I've been very bad about e-mailing), is talking about a "girl's night out" on Saturday night. It's her birthday (god, is it that time of year already? I need to keep track of these things better). I'm assuming this means that Dirk isn't invited. These people don't have boyfriends, and I think they get an inferiority complex when I bring Dirk.
Unfortunately, Nicole's friends are going to be there. Nicole requested that I please not kill them....what? Am I the one coming off as a bitch here? I'm not the one with an irritating personality, I'm not the one who whines like a simpering little HS loser because I don't have a boyfriend. Granted, I have one. I'm also not the one who asks a more experienced girl about sex and then gets offended when she says that it isn't all flowers and light. Honestly, I sometimes cannot believe that these girls are actually out of High School. And they're usually loud, too.
I just don't know why Nicole makes friends with such goddamn irritating people. And it's not like I do anything to them. I have never once threatened them with physical violence. I never even get into shouting matches with them. The only thing I've ever done is make snappy little comments when they get too loud and full of themselves. I don't even make the comments to them. I make the comments to other people. I don't even make the comments loudly enough for the offending person to hear. So I don't see how I come off as being the bad guy.
Alex isn't here today. This is both a blessing and a curse. It's a blessing because I don't have to put up with his presence. It's a curse because it means that I have to work twice as hard.
(4:50 pm) This is just going to be a quick update. I was talking to Tony today, and he said that I remind him of Daria. Not fashion-wise, but humor-wise. I've decided that Tony is the most perceptive person I know.
I showed him pictures of me drunk taken last year at Christmas time. I thought he was going to collapse from laughing so hard. Admittedly, they're great pictures. One of them shows me blitzed out of my mind (tequila shots), holding a lit cigarette, and grinning my ass off. Right after that picture was taken, I fell off the chair I was sitting on.
Maybe one day I'll let you see that picture.