I have spent the intervening time traveling the highways of america, and let me tell you, the horror that is our farms is no belief. I mean, I was trying to get a ride and baking in the Arkansas sun my effete pale skin burnt lobster, my eyes popping out in dehydration, drunk as a pig and far from any source of solace or mercy other than the sweet thrill of being woken up by my own shivering GET MOVING BOY OR DIE (hypothermia is a BIG fucking whip) and what did I see behind a fence but A HORSE CHOWING DOWN ON A DOG'S BRAIN! Which led me to form the basis of my current religion. Sing it with me, children:

It's a horse eat dog world
It's a pig eat inanimate object world
Hoo boy it's a hog eat log world
It's a deer eat the face off of a human world
It's a mules attack town and rape everybody for no reason world
Hoo boy it's a HORSE EAT DOG WORLD! OOOOO!!
(digital watch solo)

-QPM 1