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Half glass


Somebody left a half-glass of milk next to the keyboard.

Reactions:

Optimist:
The glass is half full.

Pessimist:
The glass is half empty.

Futurist:
The milk's in the wrong half of the glass.

CIA:
What makes you think that's milk?

NSA:
We know what it really is.

Copy protection crazies:
Somebody drank half my milk and didn't pay for it!

Free Software Foundation:
That milk is the cow's contribution to all mankind!

Schroedinger:
That damned cat got into the milk again!

Bill Gates:
Not enough market share to be Microsoft Milk.

Apple Computer:
You guys really oughta be drinking Perrier.

IBM:
Rent the glass from us and we'll fill it with something we
know is good for you.

Pascal programmers:
Well, what type of milk is it?

C Programmers:
No thanks; I drink straight from the jug.

Assembly programmers:
No thanks; I drink straight from the cow.

Basic programmers:
No thanks; I'm still breast feeding.

MIS:
I'll drink it if you can give me until next year.

Fuzzy logic guys:
I may or may not have drunk some part of that milk.

Prolog programmers:
I know I drank it - just don't ask me how.

Non-procedural language programmers:
I drank it when nobody was looking.

UI designers:
What's that crap in my glass?

Pentium users:
I drank Glass * .49999999 . . . but don't hold me to that.

Windows users:
Where's my straw?

Mac users:
Where's my pump?

UNIX users:
Nahh . . . too easy.

Multimedia author:


Shareware game author:
That glass is free; the next one you have to pay for.



© Richard Burk 1997-2100

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