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Your most dangerous enemies are the friends you've double-crossed.
I bet they are. I wouldn't really know, seeing as how I rarely double-cross anybody, let alone my friends, and if I were to do it, it wouldn't be through the deaths of many many people.
Man, this movie sure does have it's share of people who die. I think that's really about the only reason to see this movie. No, not people dying, but just all of the action scenes in general. They don't let much time go by inbetween buses getting blown up, train cars exploding, and guys falling off of buildings in slow motion, eventually landing on a car. Good stuff there.
The plot had something to do with Lucy Liu kidnapping the kid of some guy, and then Antonio Banderas trying to save the kid. Of course, it gets a lot more complex later on, because that can't suit audiences today. They have to try and figure out what's going on, otherwise the movie sucks, right? Good vs Evil, that's all I want. Hell, the preview for this movie had that in it. It said it, "Good Vs. Evil." Right in the middle of a bunch of other stuff. But you know what? It was "Good Vs. Evil" followed by "Good Vs. Evil/Good Vs. Evil" then "Good/Good Vs. Evil/Good" and then back to "Good Vs. Evil." Or something like that. Now, while the plot did kinda have it's share of stuff that wasn't quite right, it wasn't "Reindeer Games" or anything. They just wanted it to be more interesting. You know how it could have been more interesting?
More. Ray. Park.
Darth fuckin Maul man! Sure, that movie sucked in many people's opinions (but the pod race was cool!), but Darth Maul sure did kick some ass. And if Toad actually had some sort of use in X-Men, he would have kicked ass there as well. Hell, the work he did with the Headless Horseman was fucking awesome. But all he did here was talk and look like Jamie Kennedy. Then he gets his ass kicked because he is on the "evil" side.
But yeah, there was some other cool stuff. I think. I don't remember. There is about a 2 day pause in this review, so you're going to have to forgive me.
Oh, right, need to mention this, it's a "Franchise Picture." Anybody that knows anything about movies, knows Franchise=Failure. Plain and simple. Let's look at their track record: "Battlefield Earth," "3000 Miles To Graceland," "Angel Eyes," "The Art Of War," "Driven," "Get Carter," "The Pledge," the recent "City By The Sea," and probably the best movie they have production credit on, "The Whole Nine Yards." Now, you may like 1 or 2 of those in there, and if you do, I will pray for you. Keep in mind, they only have 36 movies credited to them, and maybe 2 are good. How are then in business still, I don't know. Almost everything they are associated with is a huge bomb, costing a lot of people a lot of money, yet they still thrive. They need to just quit while they are behind.
So, back to "Ballistic," it had a lot of guns and stuff blowing up, and that's close enough for Jazz.
Rating: "PUT IT IN"
-Grant