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So, I was just watching TV, and I flipped to MTV, because on the TV Guide channel, it claimed they were playing music videos (8:00 at night!), and I had to see for myself. So, I flip it, and Shakira is on. She's hot, so I kept watching. I'm not to sure what the song was called, I'm guessing it's here most recent single, but, holy crap. That. Video. Is. Messed. Up.
Seriously. I think one key rule to being a pop star is to not put people who are tied up in your trunk. Maybe it's me, but I think that might reflect negatively. Now, granted, I didn't see the first part of the video, but here's what I picked up.
Shakira is mad at her boyfriend who is with some other girl at a bar, so, when she sees them, she turns into a cartoon character and kicks the shit out of both of them. But then, real life comes along, she goes up and tries to do that, but instead gets pushed through a glass table. But then, these guys in super hero costumes come and beat up the boyfriend and the girl, and she ties them up, and puts them in the trunk of her car, where she takes them back to her fortress and ties them to spinning wheels to be tortured while she plays here song.
So, really, it's not THAT bad, but still, it's a little off. You think that the executives might come up and go, "Hey, Shakira, saw your new video, and we were just wondering if you had to throw the people in the trunk of your car, cuz it might look bad." I don't know. Maybe it's a good thing. Maybe that's the image she wants, go here. Kind of like Pink and Britney's new "Bondage/S&M" look. If that's what they want, go them.
Okay, now Nelly is on. This has probably been covered, but does he have a big zit on his face or something, cuz why the fuck does he need a band-aid? You think he could afford some concealer or something. Looking closer, it doesn't even seem like a band-aid. More like a piece of drywall tape or something.
Man. Drywall tape. Is that stuff useless or what? I had to use that when I was bannering the Ranch Bowl once. It was on ugly bannering job.
But seriously, why? It's the worst fasion statement. Ever. Wear a fucking onion suit to the grammy's, at least that's funny. Social commentary of some sort. But a piece of tape? Huh?
Anyways, I'm getting off this channel before I am forced to break the TV.
TV Guide channel. One of the most watched channels. Why? Because it's consistent. You leave it on Comedy Central long enough, a crappy movie might come on, or Strangers With Candy or something. TV Guide channel, you know what you are getting. Listings for the 75 other channels, which all contain nothing you want to watch! Woohoo! Go progress!
-Grant