Rommel Drives on Deep into Egypt


        by Richard Brautigan

        Rommel Drives on Deep into Egypt
        The Memoirs of Jesse James
        Romeo and Juliet
        Have You Ever Felt like a Wounded Cow
        The Net Wt. of Winter Is 6.75 Ozs.
        Postcard
        15%
        -2
        Love Poem
        Boo, Forever
        Widow's Lament
        My Nose is Growing Old




        Rommel Drives on Deep into Egypt

        Rommel is dead.
        His army has joined the quicksand legions
        of history where battle is always
        a metal echo saluting a rusty shadow.
        His tanks are gone.
        How's your ass?




        The Memoirs of Jesse James

        I remember all those thousands of hours
        that I spent in grade school watching the clock,
        waiting for recess or lunch or to go home.
        Waiting: for anything but school.
        My teachers could easily have ridden with Jesse James for all the time they stole from me.




        Romeo and Juliet

        If you will die for me,
        I will die for you

        and our graves will
        be like two lovers washing their clothes together
        in a laundromat.

        If you will bring the soap,
        I will bring the bleach.




        Have You Ever Felt like a Wounded Cow

        Have you ever felt like a wounded cow
        halfway between an over and a pasture?
        walking in a trance toward a pregnant
        seventeen-year-old housewife's
        two-day-old cookbook?




        The Net Wt. of Winter Is 6.75 Ozs.

        The net wt. of winter is 6.75 ozs.
        and winter has a regular flavor
        with Fluoristan to stop tooth decay.

        A month ago I bought a huge tube
        or Crest tooth paste and when I put it
        in the bathroom, I looked at it
        and said, "Winter."


        Postcard

        I wonder if eighty-four-year-old Colonel Sanders
        ever gets tired of travelling all around America talking about
        fried chicken.


        15%

        She tries to get things
        out of men
        that she can't get
        because she's not
        15% prettier.


        -2

        Everybody wants to go to bed
        with everybody else, they're
        lined up for blocks, so I'll
        go to bed with you. They won't
        miss us.


        Love Poem

        It's so nice
        to wake up in the morning
        all alone
        and not have to tell somebody
        you love them
        when you don't love them
        any more



        Boo, Forever

        Spinning like a ghost
        on the bottom of a
        top,
        I'm haunted by all
        the space that I
        will live without
        you.


        Widow's Lament

        It's not quite cold enough
        to go borrow some firewood
        from the neighbors.


        My Nose Is Growing Old

        Yup.
        A long lazy September look
        in the mirror
        says it's true:

        I'm 31
        and my nose is growing

        old.
        It starts about ½

        an inch
        below the bridge
        and strolls geriatrically

        down
        for another inch or so:

        stopping.
        Fortunately, the rest
        of the nose is comparatively

        young.
        I wonder if girls
        will want me with an

        old nose.
        I can hear them now
        the heartless bitches!

        "He's cute

        but his nose
        is old."




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