Did I read that message board right? Does the owner think I'm dead? HA! You can't kill the wonderful greatness that is I! I post my columns when I wish because I'm the still the ONLY ONE that makes people care about this God-awful backyard fed. Scoff if you will but check the message boards. All the posts are about me. ME! ME! Not Druid, not Two Angry Guys Wearing Stupid Masks, and certainly not FoolSpoon. Speaking of Drooly and Foolspoon, they both say that they are done wrestling and its all because of me. So I guess you can say that I ended their careers. Okay, since Mike Awesome ain't usin' that name anymore, from now on I'm the Masked 'Career Killer' Marauder. Thank God I've got a new nickname....I always hated 'Black Chick Thriller'. But that's neither here nor there so lets get on with the column and oh boy, its going to be a short one.
'Above Average' Mike Sanders. This guy is going to be SO huge, I can feel it.
You know, being the guy that runs a backyard fed is no easy job. You have to get everything set up because all the guys that wrestle for you are too damn lazy to do anything. Then you have to call all the boys and get their asses out of bed even though it is two in the afternoon. You have to make the matches, being careful to not hurt any 'egos'. Then after that you have to call the abominations that you call 'matches' and try really hard to make it seem like they're good. That in itself is a task that even Hercules would have pussied out on.
yet Owner Jeff Bob can STILl do all this and totally ruin the whole damn thing. When you let a diseased mind like his have creative control you get such gems as Bank Mule, LeVar F'N Burton and Mister Rogers. A five year old with Down's Syndrome can come up with better stuff with that. Its crap like that which makes my job so DAMN EASY!!!! You know what, its time to bring back something from my first column. I'm placing a bounty on the owner's head. And this goes out to Foolspoon and Drooly. Either of you guys make Owner Jeff tap and I'll quit the column. I'll even post one last column saying how great you are.
yeah...I still rock.
This is the Masked Marauder.
