Week III Newsletter

It wasn't a thing of beauty but the Palace of Swords took care of business, doing what they had to in order to defeat Montezuma's Revenge 27-13 in Week 3 action. The Swords (2-1) took an early 13-1 lead behind Mike Alstott's 28 yd TD run and 7 Martin Gramatica kicking points. Each team got 100 yards from RBs, as Cory Dillon and Mike Alstott both surpassed the century mark, making the score 15-3. After Sean Dawkins brought the Revenge to within 15-5 on another 100 yd game, Leroy Hoard pounded the ball over from 3 yards out to pull the Swords further ahead, 21-5. A Revenge Rich Gannon TD toss made the score 21-9 but the Swords responded with a defensive TD to go up 27-9. Gannon then connected for a 2nd TD pass for the Revenge (1-2), making the final score 27-13. K Jason Hanson was held to 1 point for the Iguanas. He's averaging only 5 points a game so far. Leroy Hoard left the game for the Swords with an injury. The 1-2 Revenge hopes to lick its wounds against Coach Unger's brother-in-law Coach Widtfeldt when the Revenge takes on the Strange Highways (2-1) in Week 4. The win was the first ever for the Swords against the Revenge, having lost twice to the Revenge in 1998 by 40-19 and 80-64 scores. The 2-1 Swords, tied for 1st in the Cheatem division with the Party and the Iguanas, play the 2-1 Stanley Steamers in a non-division matchup next week.

Ever since draft day, Coach Widtfeldt's Strange Highways were pointing toward their Week 3 tiff versus the Bearded Clams. Coach Widtfeldt was hoping to cleanse the sour taste of Coach France's draft day comment questioning Widtfeldt's draft. However, by the end of Sunday it appeared that perhaps France had the last laugh as the Clams matched the Highways score for score until taking the lead for good and doubling up the Highways, winning 43-21 to gain their 1st ever OFFL game and having the Highways to thank for it. The Clams went up early at 6-0 behind Marshall Faulk's 17 yd TD catch before the Highways answered with TD runs from each starting running back, Curtis Martin and Antowain Smith, to lead by a 12-6 score. Marshall Faulk passed 100 yards for the Clams and Kevin Johnson caught a TD ball as the Clams retook the lead 14-12. A Mike Vanderjagt FG gave the lead to the Highways 15-14 but, once again, the Clams responded immediately with a Tim Brown 20 yd TD catch. That put the Clams back on top by 20-15. After a Vanderjagt PAT made it 20-16, K Ryan Longwell booted 2 FGs and a PAT for the Clams, offsetting another Vanderjagt FG and putting them up 27-19. Four more Longwell points and Tim Brown's 100 yards countered Vanderjagt's last 2 points. At this point, the Clams led 33-21 meaning that the Highways needed 2 defensive touchdowns since anything from Terrell Owens would be countered by Steve Young. That did not happen. Monday night was anticlimactic as the Bearded Clams got a Steve Young TD pass and a Mario Bates TD run to drive over the Highways. When contacted after the game for comments, Coach Widtfeldt claimed to having been watching the Ryder Cup and not paying much attention to his team's performance. Uh, ok. One sour note on the game, however, was the concussion sustained by Steve Young. His availability for Week 4 was still undetermined at press time. The Clams (1-2) play winless PMS next week while the Highways try to begin the road repair in Week 4 against Montezuma's Revenge (1-2) assuming there's no golf on television that day.

While the Greenback Iguanas sat perched on their rocks under the sun (or was that merely a hot lamp), the NFC Norris arose from a daylong slumber in time to pull out a low scoring ugly but satisfying win for the Norris 22-11. One week after having scored 54 points without Jamal Anderson (as the Lizard boys were fond of reminding us), they managed to get scoring help from only one RB and their kicker. This game stayed scoreless until after 3pm when the Iguanas finally took a 3-0 lead on a Mike Hollis FG. Seven Gary Anderson kicking points and a Jimmy Smith TD catch put the Norris into a 13-11 lead, countering an Eddie George Iguana TD. The Iguanas continued to stay cold and the Norris got 6 late points from Brett Favre, who avoided being shut out for the 2nd straight game. Anderson added his last PAT for a 22-11 Norris lead. The Iguanas last hope was Drew Bledsoe and Terry Glenn in the SNF game but they were both totally shut out, securing the Norris' victory, their 2nd of the year. The Iguanas (2-1) fall into a three way tie for first in the Cheatem division and will try to rebound next week versus the Retreads in another difficult game. The Norris, now 3-2 lifetime against the Green Llamas, play the 3-0 Natural Mystics next week and will do so with a 2-1 record and 1st place in the Dewey division.

The Natural Mystics who entered their Week 3 game against the King of Dogs were in a word, hot. While sane men and women waited for the scoring to inevitably slow down, they'll have to wait another week as the Mystics moved their record to 3-0 with a 59-12 beating of the Dogs. The Mystics took an early 6-0 lead behind Wesley Walls' touchdown catch before the Dogs kicked a field goal and a PAT to stay close, trailing 6-4. The Mystics responded with sudden force as Peyton Manning found Marvin Harrison open for a 33 yd TD pass and Natrone Means scored on a 1 yd run. Harrison topped the 100 yd mark and the score was 24-4 in an eyeblink. After Manning topped the 300 yd passing mark, the Msytics found themselves up 26-4. Just as suddenly as the Mystics scored their 1st 24, a late flurry in the 3pm games made the score 43-6. Jake Reed's 100 yard receiving game gave the Dogs their 5th and 6th points but Manning threw and ran for last minute TDs while passing the 400 yard mark and Tyrone Wheatley went over for a score. Terry Allen and Adam Vinatieri closed the Mystic scoring in the SNF game with a TD and 3 FGs giving the Mystics a 59-6 lead and high points in the league for the 3rd week in a row. The Dogs added 6 Monday night points on a Jerry Rice TD catch to close the scoring. With the victory, the Mystics even the series 1-1 versus the Dogs. The Mystics play the 2-1 Dewey division leading NFC Norris next week while the Dogs go from the top scoring team to the 2nd best scoring team, Grande To The Party.

The Stanley Steamers led from the bell to the tape, defeating PMS 29-26 in Week 3 action and keeping pace in the tough Howe division. The Steamers ran out to a fast 19-1 lead behind the leg of K Steve Christie, who had 4 FG among his 13 early points. TE Jay Riemersma caught a TD for the Steamers. A Charlie Batch TD toss and another Steve Christie PAT made the score 24-1 for the Steamers. A Jason Elam FG and a Ron Rivers TD catch brought PMS within 24-10 but the Rivers' catch came from QB Charlie Batch. So the Steamers went up 28-10 and the score was 29-10 after Batch threw for a 2 pt. conversion. PMS cut the lead in half with a Brunell TD pass and a TD catch from TE Rickey Dudley. At 29-20, Randy Moss added a TD catch for PMS but the well ran dry at that point. One difference in the game was evident in the kicking game. While Steve Christie toed 14 points, Jason Elam managed only 4 for PMS. In fact, Elam has accounted for only 12 points all season after Week 3. Christie's 14 gives him 25 on the year. The Steamers (2-1) keep pace with the Mystics, one game out in the Howe while PMS drops to 0-3 on the season and in serious danger of having its season go down the drain by the start of October. The Steamers are now 1-1 versus PMS lifetime. They will next play the 2-1 Palace of Swords in a non-division game while PMS hopes to stop seeing red when they take on the Bearded Clams (1-2).

After trailing the entire afternoon and still behind 38-33 with barely three minutes left in the game, Grande To The Party suddenly came to life like something from Return of the Living (Grande) Dead and literally stole a game away from the Retreads 44-38. The Retreads stormed to a quick 12-0 lead behind two defensive scores. Following an Ed McCaffrey TD catch for the Party, the Retreads exploded a second time behind QB Kurt Warner's 3 TD passes of 38, 46, and 17 yards and a TD run of 5 yards to take a 30-12 lead. Just as Coach Will was beginning to discuss going out like Thelma & Louise with Coach Widtfeldt in the Blazer, Stephen Davis accounted for the Party's 2nd TD, leaving them trailing by 18 points. After Mushin Muhammad passed the 100 yd mark for the Retreads, making the score 32-12, two more Stephen Davis TDs brought the Party within 32-24. Davis has 8 TDs in the 1st three weeks of the season already. The teams traded scores as John Carney kicked for 2 PATs and a 50 yd FG but the Party responded with a Curtis Enis TD reception, making the score 38-31. With barely five minutes left in the game, K Al Del Greco posted a pair of PATs around 2 FGs and suddenly the score was tied at 38-38. With only 2 minutes left, Randall Cunningham came through in the clutch and the Party had their first and only lead of the game, 42-38. One factor in the game was Stephen Davis's 3 TDs. While he was doing all the scoring for the Washington Redskins, Michael Westbrook was being shut out as a result. That fact hurt the Retreads when it counted. The win was particularly sweet for Coach Will after the Retreads had put the wood to the Party not once, but twice, last year winning 55-33 and 72-35 and being a major factor why the Party choked down the stretch in '98 and missed out on a playoff berth. With the victory, the Party is 2-1 and tied for 1st in the Cheatem division with the Iguanas and Swords and now trail the Retreads 1-2 all-time. The Retreads (1-2) will try to find better luck next week against the 2-1 Greenback Iguanas while the Party will face the low scoring King of Smog (0-3).

Week 3 Entries Into the League Record Book:

First, let me apologize in advance. It's not my intention to blow the Mystics' horn but those of you who've been in the league long enough know that anything added to the record book goes here. For better or worse, the Mystics have been scoring at a high enough clip to gain entry so here goes:

• The Natural Mystics winning streak has reached 6 covering the end of 1998 and through Wk. 3 of '99. The all-time record is 10 by the Crawling King Snakes in 1996-7.

• The Mystics scored 50+ points for the 3rd week in a row, coming within one of the league record of 4 games in a row set by Two Turntables & A Microphone in 1996. To tie the record in Week 4, they'll need to do it with 3 starters on the bench with byes.

• The Mystics' 3 week total of 190 points shatters the old record of 182 points over a three game period. That record was held by the Retreads in '98. Dating back to Wk. 15 of last season, the Mystics have scored 234 points which also breaks Coach Will's record of 214.

• Lastly, the Mystics surpassed 50 points for the 17th time in franchise history, pulling into a tie for the all-time league mark with who else but Coach Will. Behind those two teams, the next top teams are the Strange Highways and the Retreads with 8 times apiece. What's amazing about the Retreads total is that it was achieved in only one season. The Highways, Mystics and Party have been in the league since the beginning (7 years now).

• The King of Dogs allowed 50+ points for the 3rd game in a row, tying a record previously set by the Crawling King Snakes and El Mariachi Boyz (Coach Widtfeldt) in 1995.

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