The job of the president is basically to take any criticisms of the country and give an answer, filled with bullshit, to make the negatives seem positive. Also gets to sign bills, make public appearances, get gift money from Asia, hire as many interns as he sees possible.
THE HOUSE
The job of the House is to make all important descisions for the country. The House has the most important job, but the President has the most glamorous. His other duties include maintaining the official website of the country, overseeing all McDonald's restaurants, and collecting tax dollars (which may or may not be turned in to the country's budget.)
HEAD OF SSC (Senate Surveilance Committee)
The job of the head of SSC is to watch the senate, which was disbanded as of July 6, 1998, making the U.S. of Pat a unicameral government. The Head of SSC is also the secretary of the interior, whose duties include making sure all national parks (including waysides and their bathrooms) are kept tidy.
STURGEON GENERAL
The job of the Sturgeon General is to determine the length and frequency of the nation's hunting seasons. Her approval is required to make anything the nation's official item. She is the only government official to live in the nation's capital, as according to the president, "She's used to (the smell)." As of July 9, her duties expanded to include being the mayor of the nation's capital.
COLONEL SANDERS
His job is to oversee all of the nation's Kentucky Fried Chicken restaurants. The president also suggested that his duties expand to include being the First Transvestite, but the bill was shot down by the Sturgeon General.
HEAD OF PUBLIC RELATIONS
His job is to schedule appearances for the House and President so they may solicit votes while trying to convey a "we care" attitude (basically, he cons the public). His first (and as of Sept. 8, his last) such stunt was the Big Ass Burger Challenge.
POSTMASTER GENERAL
His job is to oversee all of the ZIP codes of the nation. Currently, he has been assigned to Montoming, Dakota, Puerto Rico, and Wisconsin #2 to reassign the ZIP codes there. He has the power to propose bills, but they must be appoved by the house, signed by the senate, and given the seal of approval of by the sturgeon general.
HEAD OF DRD (Department of Redundancy Department), Jenny
The job of the head of DRD is to repeat whatever she says as often as possible. She is very annoying to the president and the house, as her pointless suggestions are often repeated.
