How does a chicken cross the road?

Why the Internet Is Like a Penis

 
* It can be up or down.  It`s more fun when it`s up, but that makes it
  difficult to get any real work done.

* In the long-distant past, its only purpose was to transmit information
  considered vital to the survival of the species.  Some people still
  think that`s the only thing it should be used for, but most folks
  today use it for fun most of the time.

* It has no conscience and no memory.  Left to its own devices, it will
  just do the same damn dumb things it did before.

* It provides a way to interact with other people.  Some people take
  this interaction very seriously, others treat it as a lark.  Sometimes
  it`s hard to tell what kind of person you`re dealing with until it`s  
  too late.

* If you don`t apply the appropriate protective measures, it can spread
  viruses.

* It has no brain of its own.  Instead, it uses yours.  If you use it
  too much, you`ll find it becomes more and more difficult to think
  coherently.

* We attach an importance to it that is far greater than its actual
  size and influence warrant.

* If you`re not careful what you do with it, it can get you in big     
  trouble.

* It has its own agenda.  Somehow, no matter how good your intentions,  
  it will warp your behavior.  Later you may ask yourself "why on earth
  did I do that?"

* Some folks have it, some don`t. Those who have it would be devastated 
  if it were ever cut off. They think that those who don`t have it are  
  somehow inferior.  They think it gives them power.  They are wrong.
  Those who don`t have it may agree that it`s a nifty toy, but think   
  it`s not worth the fuss that those who do have it make about it.    
  Still, many of those who don`t have it would like to try it.

* Once you`ve started playing with it, it`s hard to stop.  Some people
  would just play with it all day if they didn`t have work to do.

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