LIVE FROM THE SHAWPLEX!!!!!!LIVE FROM THE SHAWPLEX!!!!!!
(Camera opens on the masked man this time setting some sticks of dynamite. The sticks spell out SEWF and he detonates the sticks, exploding to reveal the "broadcast location" and the smiling Stylin' Steve Chen)
SSC: We are off and running tonight with another edition of the hottest wrestling show on the planet, SNM!!! We're here in the SEWF, where women's wrestling is illegal and pain killers are too. You won't be seeing Madusa on this show. Anyway, we are priveleged? to have with us tonight Musty Rhodes! Musty, come on out.
(Musty Rhodes makes his way down the ramp, dragging his keg beind him. Gets lost going around the ring, trying to find the announcers table. Circles the ring three times, tries to climb into the audience and finally heads back up the ramp before SEWF officials show him to the announce table. Musty sits, positions his keg, puts his head down and promptly falls asleep.>
SSC: Hello, Mr. Rhodes. Mr. Rhodes? Musty? Wake up.
MR: Huh? Uhhhhh. Where'm'I?
SSC: Your here, on the Mothership.
MR: Oh hallelujiah. I's a goin' home. My people's come and fly me away.
SSC: I mean the Saturday Night Mothership. In the SEWF.
MR: Ohhh. I'm on da Muddership. The premeeeere wrasslin' show on da TV. Oh, dat's ok too.
SSC: Uh..yeah. And of course JLB has once again joined us for the "other perspective." Now, no more delay, let's get to our first bout on SNM!!!
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Vandal Savage vs. SuperNova
SuperNova didn't seem at all concerned as he made his way to the ring to face Vandal Savage. The two men locke up right away and Savage pushes Nova back into the buckle, followed by a loud backhand chop. Nova wasn't to be intimidated though and he responds with two loud chops of his own, forcing Savage back. SuperNova with the snapmare and then a dropkick to the back of the head! Cover..one..kickout with authority! Savage is back up and blocks a SuperNova punch, responding with two big roundhouses of his own. He sends SuperNova into the ropes and sends him crashing to the mat with a big side slam. Savage goes to the ropes and comes up with a big clothesline, but SuperNova grabs the arm, floats over and hits a DDT! Amazing! SuperNova gets back to his feet a grabs a spinning toe hold on the big man, cranking it on three times, working over the knee. Shades of his own debut match. Vandal Savage shows that he can wrestle too however and counters with a small package...one...two..no, SuperNova manages a kickout. Savage gets to his feet, but SuperNova takes him down with a legsweep. Nova grabs a single leg boston crab, continuing his focus on the knee of his opponent. After much struggle, Vandal Savage gets to the ropes and forces the break. Vandall rakes SuperNova's eyes and does a backward head slam, sending Nova's skull crashing into the mat. Vandal goes to the ropes for a big legdrop, but Nova rolls clear and Savage comes down on his well-worked over leg. SuperNova is back up first and nails a precision dropkick right to the chin. Savage is down and SuperNova looks ready to lock on the Texas Clover Leaf for the finish, but someone is coming down to ringside.......it's Maul! What's he doing here? SuperNova is asking him the same question. They're exchanging words....the ref is checking on Savage and SuperNova turns around to return to the match, but apparently Maul isn't so willing to let things go. He climbs up on the apron and grabs SuperNova from behind. Maul slams him backfirst into the turnbuckle, taking all of the wind out of Nova. SuperNova is stunned. Vandal Savage is up and locks on the Deep Sleep! The ref orders Maul off the apron, and he leaves. Savage has the Deep Sleep on in the centre of the ring. SuperNova had the wind knocked out of him by Maul and just couldn't fight on. The ref held up the arm three times and called for the bell.
WINNER: Vandal Savage via Maul assisted Deep Sleep
SSC: Well, Vandal is off to a good start. What Maul was doing out there, I wouldn't now.
MR: It's all in the the the strat'gy o' the wrassla if you weeeeeel.
SSC: What? Anyway, let's get to our next match.
JLB: Who invited him anyway?
Cyanide vs. Death Row Inmate w/Kez
Ominous horn music plays over the speakers, and Kuro Kazuya, Nomad, Sampson, Cyanide, and Hemlock and Poison all come down the aisle. Hemlock and Poison are wearing the SEWF World Tag Team Champion belts, and all the wrestlers have the Plague's logo somewhere on their outfits. The group reaches the ring, and Kuro Kazuya takes the microphone.
Kazuya- "Hemlock here has a lot to say, and I'm going to step aside and let him speak, now."
Hemlock takes the microphone from Kazuya, and begins to speak.
Hemlock- "All this week leading up to the Mothership, I warned you about this announcement that would affect you all. I will now show you that the Plague not only threatens, it delivers. I am here to inform you all of something very important. You see, before I joined the Plague, before I even teamed with Poison, I had built myself a respectable career as a singles wrestler. Respectable, funny the connotations that word brings on. You see, society never found me ot be respectable, instead, it rejected me. I found my own kind, the Plague, and prospered with them. It was through this reunitement with my own kind that Poison and I were able to win the SEWF World Tag Team Titles, and that we were able to find Cyanide, the silent assassin. It is these two men, Cyanide and Poison, that are a crucial part of what I am coming to. I have been in contact with President Shaw, and the following agreement was reached. It was determined through the power of the President of the SEWF, and cannot and will not be disputed. *Hemlock takes off his Tag Team Title belt*. In order to resume my singles career, by the order of President Shaw, the new tag team champions are... Poison and Cyanide. *Hemlock puts the belt around Cyanide's waist. Cyanide shows no emotion.* What are the effects of this announcement? By giving up my position on the tag team, I will now be able to participate in matches that I would not have been able to, due to defenses of the belts. For example, I am now available to be the Plague's representative on the SEWF's team at War Games at Bringing Down the House. Though no one, not even pro-SEWF wrestlers are safe from the Plague, like any disease, the Plague will attack the weakest facility first. In this case, the PTD. Also, I will now be able to join my fellow Plague members in thrashing Myst once more, in the 5-man survivor series match. Myst, you will soon learn why thethe Plague is THE ULTIMATE SOLUTION. Finally, I will be able to resume my singles career, starting tonight. You see, because Cyanide took my spot on the tag team, I will be taking his spot in his match tonight. DRI, I beat your mentor, and now, I will beat you. First you, then Myst, then the rest of the PTD will learn what true torment truly is. We had been different... too different... and now, we will make THEM different."
The horn music starts playing again, and Kuro Kazuya leads the rest of the Plague out of the ring.
Soon after Hemlock was in the ring a stare down between these two giant men ensued. It was quickly ended by a big knee to the sternum by Hemlock. He unloaded with a barrage of wild kicks to the midsection of the DRI. The DRI worked his way up using the ropes only to be clotheslined out of the ring and onto the floor. Hemlock rolled under the ropes and onto the floor after the DRI. The DRI poked Hemlock in the eye, and then gave him a slingshot into the steel stairs. Hemlock, now dazed, got up just in time to catch a giant boot right in the face. DRI picked up Hemlock and rolled him into the ring. Hemlock got up and stumbled into a neutral corner. The DRI was quick to follow and got caught with a sharp elbow to the chin. The stunned DRI bent over to check for blood and Hemlock followed through with a double arm DDT. Hemlock went for the cover..ONE....TWO...THR....DRI got a shoulder up just in time. Hemlock then scoop slammed the DRI bounced off the rope and dropped a knee directly on his chin. Hemlock then threw the DRI into the ropes, landed a big powerslam, and went for the cover....ONE...TWO...THREE!!!!!! Hemlock then stood above the beaten DRI left a message that only they could here, and walked back into the locker room.
WINNER: Hemlock via powerslam
SSC: DRI fails in his debut, makes me almost wanna laugh.
JLB: It's not funny.
SSC: Yeah, whatever, next match!
JLB: I'll be back, just wanna take a closer look.
SINGLES ACTION
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Styme vs. Lord Infamous
Lord Infamous came to the ring first, bland music playing in the background. He's infamous here as he is getting booed all over the place. He's not liked here in this arena with these fans. Next, here comes the PTD music. Styme, the leader of the PTD comes down. Thunder Rider is with them. Camera goes to PTD in the locker room, watching Styme and TR slowly. The two men stare at each other as the bell sounds and Styme goes and charges into Lord with a lot of tenacity. He's ripping Lord a new a$$hole. Oh my! A hip toss. Styme gets on top and starts firing punches into Lord's head. He gets up and high fives TR. TR applauds as Styme picks up Lord and gives him a quick suplex with a bridge, 1..2.. no, kick out. Styme doesn't like that and bodyslams him and drops three straight elbows. Another cover and only a 2 this time. Styme scoops up Lord and a fallaway slam. Another cover, 1..2..no, a third kickout. Styme doesn't like this and starts working on the legs of Lord, trying to set him up for the Sharpshooter. He locks on the sharpshooter, but Lord was able to reach for the ropes. Styme is looking very pissed and Lord has shown a lot of toughness. Lord with a quick rake of the eyes and starts unloading rights and lefts. A right floors Styme. Lord with some stomps and kicks on Styme. Styme reaches for the ropes. He slowly gets up and the two men lock up. Styme with a quick kick to the stomach and a DDT. Lord looks hurt. Styme scoops up Lord and places him on the top rope. He gets up on the top rope and does a Dynamite DDT. Oh my, he sent a message to the Youngbloods and Dynamite Dave with that one. 1..2..3. It's over, Styme wins. Afterwards, No limit tank comes down to the ringside, followed by the PTD as they ensue to beat Tank and Lord down. They stop after the lights went on and the voice of Destroyer said watch out.
WINNER: Styme via Dynamite DDT
JLB: That's more like it.
SSC: He beat a rookie, oh boy.
MR: Rooooookies are the future o' the wrasslin' bidness if you weeeeeelll.
SSC: Ok, you're not allowed to talk anymore
MR: PUDDIN'!!!
SSC: What?
MR: I didn't say nuttin'.
Hard Core w/Jim Daniels vs. War Machine
Hard Core came down to ring side with the ever drunken Jim Daniels. They received some boos from the crowd. War Machine came out to a chorus of cheers. This match proved to be a short, exciting match. They locked up and War Machine took down Hardcore with a leg sweep and start working on the arms and legs with stomps and kicks. He drop a elbow to the back of the neck. Hard core got back to his feet and deliver a bunch of solid rights and lefts. A dropkick floored War and Hard Core followed with a corkscrew legdrop and a sommersault splash from the mat. He went for a cover but got a 2. He picked War up but War went down low and belly to back suplexed Hard Core out of the ring onto the floor. That's why it's padded, but it still hurt. Jim came over to his man, but War chased him off. He got a chair and bashed him over the head once and rolled him back in. A quick cover, but only a 2. War decided to go for a powerbomb, but Hard Core was ready and reverse it to a roll up. Cover. 1..2..no, 2 and half. Both men got up to their feet, but Hard Core clotheslined War. War went down. Hard Core got a chair from his mananger as Jim distracted the ref. Hard Core with a DDT on the chair. but that wasnit enough. He did a corkscrew piledriver onto the chair and pushed it out of the ring before the ref turned around. Cover, 1..2..3. Hard Core proved to be Hard Core.
WINNER: Hard Core via chair shot
SSC: Musty, what do you think of the style of Hard Core?
MR: He good, he good; but he just a big fightin' boy. He jes' get in da ring and fight. In my day, I was what you call one a dem' technical types a wrasslers.
JLB: You?? Technical?
MR: Dat's right. I could punch 'em wit' my right and my lef' hand. Either one. Technical style. Den' I hit 'em wit' de ol' belly-welly.
JLB: Again with the freaking belly-welly!
MR: Don't you be talkin' bad 'bout my belly-welly! I'll have it get up and knock you one.
JLB: Can your arms even reach past your belly-welly?
MR: Depens' what's on da udder side.
SSC: Never at a loss for intelligent conversation here on the mothership, let's go the ring.
Jameson Spleen w/Jenkins vs. DC Stryker
DC Stryker makes his way to the ring. He looks determined, yet smug. Confident that he's got what it takes to beat Jameson Spleen. Shortly after Stryker enters the ring, the light sounds of "Girl from Impanema" begin to filter through the house PA system. Jameson Spleen, accompanied by Jenkins, makes his grand entrance to the delight of the crowd. As they approach the ringside area, Jenkins whispers something into Spleen's ear. He nods his head, and climbs into the ring, where he is met by a flury of kicks, at the hands of Stryker. Stryker whips Spleen into the ropes, and connects with a heavy lariat that flatens Spleen. After three or four more kicks, Stryker picks up Spleen, and nails a quick vertical suplex. Stryker takes a moment to circle the ring, and shakes his finger at Jenkins. Spleen gets to his knees as Stryker comes ofver and lays a nasty looking punch right to the side of Spleens head. Spleen grabs Stryker by the hips, then thrusts is shoulder into Strykers gut, followed by a big back body drop that leaves Stryker flat on his back, gasping for air. Quickly, Spleen follows up with two elbow drops. Stryker stagers to his feet, only to be greeted by a lariat that sends him backward into the corner. Befor Stryker can figure out where he is, Spleen connects with a running back elbow to the side of Strykers head. Spleen sets Stryker up on the top turnbuckle, and climbs up behind him. Looks like we could see the Spleen Buster, but no, Stryker knew what was coming, and manages to throw Spleen into the center of the ring. Taking advantage of his possition on the top rope, Stryker quickly follows with a flying elbow, but he was to quick, because when Spleen hit the mat, he bounced, causing Strykers elbow drop to fall short. Spleen, who appears to be in a bit of pain after that bad bounce, crawls over and covers Stryker, but can only get a two count. Spleen Gets to his feet, holding Stryker by the hair, he gets him into a headlock, then nails him with a high vertical suplex. Spleen gteps back for a moment to allow Stryker to get to his feet, making sure he stays behind Stryker. When Stryker gets fully to his feet, Spleen rushes up behind and locks him in a full nelson. Stryker, ever the fighter, is determined not to give in. Spleen begins to drag Stryker towords the corner. Climbing backwards up the ropes, Spleen uses all the strength he can muster to pull Stryker up to the top rope. Once Stryker realizes what's about to happen, he makes a feverish attempt to break the hold, but to no avail. Spleen nails Stryker hard with the Spleen Buster. With a rather half-assed cover, Spleen easily gets the three count. Jenkins climbs into the ring and hands Spleen a towel. Spleen wipes the sweat off of his face, then uses it to cover Strykers face. Spleen laughs as he and Jenkins exit the ring area.
WINNER: Jameson Spleen via Spleen Buster
SSC: Nice match, I must say I'm very impressed so far with Spleen.
MR: Cheeeken Spleen? I eat 'dem fer breakfast ebery day.
SSC: Yeah, that's normal.
JLB: In Zaire.
SSC: Next!
Bouncer vs. Sampson
Skullman came out to the front row to watch this one. Sampson came out accompanied by Nomad of The Plague. Nomad stood at ringside the whole time. Foolery came out with Lord Infamous, who stayed on the opposite side of the ring. Sampson hit a lariat to start off, and then hit a guillitine legdrop from the top rope. Sampson brawled with Foolery for a while, neither really winning. Foolery pulled out some nice slams, including one powerslam that nearly garnered him a win. Foolery then went up top, and went for a giant elbowsmash, which he missed by a long shot. Sampson seemed angry and methodical, as he quickly hit a back body drop over the top ropes on Foolery, and a spike piledriver on the concrete. Sampson then tossed Foolery into the ring, and just demolished him with a shoulderbreaker. From there, Sampson quickly lifted up Foolery and hitting a running tombstone piledriver for the 3 count.
WINNER: Sampson via running tombstone piledriver
SSC:Sampson is making quite a name for himself here in SEWF, he appears to have quite a future! He also fits in well with The Plague. On to our next wonderful matchup...
Kuro Kazuya vs. Ice Wolf
Ice Wolf came out first, to no reaction whatsoever. His opponent came out in striking fashion, Kazuya coming out as a black light went up, and baratone music began playing. He slowly walked to the ring. Never taking his eyes off of Ice Wolf. As a note, Kazuya beat this man so badly last time that he changed his name to Ice Wolf. He was Shadow Dragon up until that match. Kazuya started off quickly, with a boot to the face, and a legdrop. Kazuya then picked up the smaller man, and powerbombed him two times. Following this, he picked him up again. Kazuya proceeded to hit a running Liger bomb that came incredibly close to breaking the entire ring. Kuro once more picked the little man up, and gorilla pressed him, his neck snapping over the top rope. Kazuya picked him up, just punishing him now. He shoved Ice Wolf into the corner, and unloaded with a series of lightning kicks to the face and midsection, all solidly connecting. Kazuya topped that off with an axe kick that almost split Ice Wolf in half. Ice Wolf was quite obviously unconscious. But Kazuya was unfinished. He picked him back up, and hit him with both versions of the Michinoku Driver. It seemed Kazuya was ready to end this one, and he picked up Ice Wolf once more, this time grabbing his skull, and hitting the Kuro-Jin. He did not however, let go, he actually picked the man up from the mat by his head and delivered the move three more times, showing absolute dominance, before applying a lateral press to get the 3 count. The lights all went down, and strnage music played. A single spotlight shone one wall of The Shawplex. On the wall staring down at Kazuya was a man looking EXACTLY like Kazuya, aside from wearing all white instead of black. This continued for abou 10 seconds, until the lights dimmed and returned to normal once again, leaving not a trace of the other man.
WINNER: Kuro Kazuya via 4 Kuro-Jins
SSC: Reminiscent of Kazuya's match with Roadkill, total annihilation by Kazuya. Who was that man!?!? That was WEIRD. He seemed to be glaring at Kazuya. Hopefully more info on this as it unfolds...Up next, more superb SEWF action!
JLB: Sorry, I fell asleep, did I miss anything.
SSC: Uh....no.
NO DQ MATCH
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"Devilman Christian Alicea vs. Kezmaniac w/DRI
As Kezmaniac and Death Row Inmate started down towards ringside, Christian Alicea made his own entrace, coming out behind them with a steel chair, which he blasted across DRI's back and then got Kez over the head as he turned around. The bell rang and the match was on. Alicea drags Kezmaniac down to ringside and sets up for a suplex, but Kez blocks. Tries again and this time he gets Kez over. With Kez holding his back in pain, Alicea goes up to the apron and somersaults off, landing onto the prone Kezmaniac. Both men slowly get to their feet and Alicea rolls Kezmaniac into the ring. Alicea heads up top and comes off with a big lariat, sending Kez crashing to the mat. Cover...1..2..no, Kezmaniac isn't going down that easily. Alicea goes for a waistlock, reversed with a go behind....Devilman blocks the attempted german suplex by going limp so Kezmaniac just drives him face first into the mat! Kez plants a pair of boots into Alicea's neck and then gets a chair from Death Row Inmate (who had made his way to ringside). Kezmaniac sets the chair on the mat....DDT! Alicea has a small cut on his forehead as Kezmaniac drags him up by the hair and throws him over the top rope to the floor. As Alicea struggles to his feet, Kezmaniac comes off the apron with a double-axehandle to the back of the head. Kez grabs Devilman and bashes him head first into the steel post, opening that cut further. Whip into the guardrail, reversed, reversed again, and once more and Kez crashes back first into the railing, bending it! Christian Alicea picks up Kez and crotches him on the railing! He goes up to the apron and here comes another lariat, sending both men tumbling into the crowd! Both men struggle to their feet and Alicea grabs a chair and blasts it over Kez's head, busting him open now. He throws Kez over the barrier and tumbles to the floor. Alicea follows him over and picks up Kez, dropping him facefirst onto the apron. Alicea wipes away some blood, but Kezmaniac wasn't done yet, grabbed Alicea's tights and used leverage to send Alicea crashing into the guard rail. Kezmaniac is up, picks up a chair and bashes Alicea over the head with it twice. DRI takes the timekeeper's table and sets it up for Kez, who suplexes Alicea right through it! Kezmaniac rolls Alicea into the ring and goes for the cover...One...Two...Thre...no, the ref says Alicea got his shoulder up! Kezmaniac yells at the ref about the slow count, but quickly turns his attention back onto Devilman. He grabs Alicea with a half-nelson and a tightwaist......hardway kezplex! He dropped Alicea right on his head! Kezmaniac runs his finger across his throat and locks on the kezmission as Alicea struggles back to his feet. Alicea is fighting for all he's worth. DRI heads back to the back and emerges with a ladder! Alicea tries to springboard back off the ropes, but Kez just tightens his hold. He has Alicea trapped on the mat. Alicea continues to fight as DRI throws the ladder into the ring. Kez let Alicea out of the hold! I don't think it matters though, it looks like Alicea is out of it. Kezmaniac sets up the ladder beside Alicea and climbs to the top. He wipes the blood from his highs and leaps off.....big legdrop! Cover...One...Two...Th...no, Alicea got his shoulder up! Kezmaniac looks shocked. He slams Alicea to the mat and goes up atop the ladder again. Goes for a kamikaze headbutt, but Alicea rolls out of the way. Alicea climbs up the ladder as Kezmaniac gets to his feet......moonsault off the ladder! One...Two...Three! Alicea wins! Alicea wins! DRI is in the ring and Kez is up fast, looking very pissed. DRI nails Alicea with a running lariat as Kezmaniac pitches the ref over the top rope. Here comes Road Kill, Thunder Rider and Chapel! It's a five on one stomp fest! Chapel hits the NIGHTSTRIKE! They lay Alicea in the centre of the ring and place the ladder over top of him.....here comes Thunder Rider and Road Kill with a double legdrop! They just flattenned Alicea! Kezmaniac is mad. He throws the ladder off and grabs Alicea. Here's the kezmission again. He's gonna break this kid's neck! Two more refs run out, but Chapel and DRI get rid of them. Thunder Rider's taunting Alicea, but I don't even think he's conscious. Kezmaniac is not letting go! Somebody better get out here to help this kid or he'll be dead! Well, to answer the call, the Youngbloods come out as does Ropin' Tex. They clear out the PTD and Alicea gets stretchered out. The preliminary prognosis was a mild concussion and injured neck. We'll keep ya posted.
WINNER: "Devliman" Christian Alicea via ladder moonsault
JLB: So, Musty, how was Max Mini?
MR: Now dat's not my fault. Anything that tiny has gots to be filled wit' puddin'. Tasty, tasty puddin'. Jes' like dem' Keebler elves. Or jockeys. Dat's how I see it.
SSC: I think you're filled with puddin'
MR: Really?!?!?!
SSC: (sighs) Bring on Ropin' Tex
JLB: To get slaughtered.
HANDICAP MATCH
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Ropin' Tex vs. Thunder Rider/Road Kill
As we go to ringside, we see Ropin Tex already in the ring bouncing up and down in it, warming himself for his match. The lights begin to dim, and Road Kill and Thunder Rider come down to the ring. The bell did not even ring yet, and already Tex is going at both men. He runs at Road Kill with a lariet and knocks him out of the ring, just before he managed to step into it. Tex then grabed Thunder Rider, as the bell finally sounded, and suplexed him into the ring. Tex followed this up with a quick elbow drop. Road Kill tried, once again, to get into the ring, only to be met with a big foot to the skull. Road Kill fell back to the ring floor, and hit his head on the railing outside near the fans. A slow, but steady, flow of blood came from his forehead. Back to the ring, Tex jumped to the second rope, and set up for a double ax-handle. It hit its mark, right on Thunder Riders head! Tex is on fire! He picked up TR, through him to the ropes, and preformed a perfect back body drop. The ref did not know what to do. The ref looked on in awe and had a face of helplessness. Tex was not done. He picked up TR, hoisted him up on his shoulder, ...shoulder breaker! Thunder Rider was in certain pain. In the meantime, Road Kill was coming through, but that was not to be the worst of Tex's problems. Kezmaniac,Chapel,and Christina. Tex did not see them due to his focus on Thunder Rider. This was not going to be good for Tex. In the ring, Tex was dominating. He had Thunder Rider in a reverse knee lock near the ropes. Thunder Rider was screaming in pain as he was reaching for the ropes. He managed to grab the bottom rope and pull himself out of it. Tex was still on top. Road Kill tried, for a third time, tried to enter the ring, but Tex had enough of this. He right out and cold cocked him in the chin. Road Kill had his taste, and went to Kez, Chapel, and Christina to discuss what was happening. What a rat! Leaving his partner! It was going good for Tex, until the PTD came to ringside. Tex picked up Thunder Rider, through him to the ropes while Tex went the opposite ropes for more mommentum, but, to no surprise, Kez grabed his foot. Tex turned to go after Kez, but Thunder Rider hit him in the back with a high knee. Tex was in pain from the kidney shot. Thunder Rider picked up Tex for a suplex and hit it perfectly. Tex had lost the flame, but was not as in pain as Thunder Rider. TR went to pick up Tex, only to meet two thumbs to the eyes! Tex was not pulling any puches now! There is no love lost here! Tex, who was near the ropes, picked up Thunder Rider for a suplex, only to have his legs give out. It was Chapel pulling them!! Thunder Rider was in pining position. Wait!!! Kez was holding Tex's left leg while Chapel held the second!!! I can't belive the ref can't see this!! 1...2.....3!!!!! NO!!! Tex was beaten. It was not yet over! Thunder Rider, after the pin, quickly began to beat on Tex with Kez, Chapel, and Christina helping! I can't believe this! Kez picked up Tex and executed the KEZBUSTER!!! I can't belive this! Tex was hurt. Christina went out, only to bring in a chair. Road Kill took the chair while Thunder Rider and Kez held up Tex. BAM!!! The chair hit squarely on Tex's head. He was out like a light. Blood started to trickle down Tex's forehead. Christina grabed a bottle of spray paint from under the ring, only to spray Tex's back with an "0". What a disgrace! The PTD, with their cheap win, walked back down the isle with a cocky look on their faces. After the final bell, Tex was down, BUT NOT OUT!!! He stood up, braced himself, and looked aroung for the PTD. He could not believe what happened. Cheers came from the roaring crowd as Tex ran back to the dressing room after the PTD. What a match. It is a shame that it had to end this way!!!!
WINNERS: TR/RK via some assitance
JLB: What did I tell ya?
SSC: We know you can't win anything if you don't cheat, so just save your breath.
JLB: You're just jealous.
SSC: Yeah, I got announcer envy. Here comes Styme again.
JLB: I'll be going down to watch this one.
GRUDGE MATCH
---------------------
Styme vs. Myst w/Host
Styme came out ready to go with JLB and co. just like his other match to face this newcomer, Myst. The two locked it up to begin and Myst quickly took the advantaged with a knee to the groin and a drop kick to the legs. Styme stumbled backwards but rolled through and hit Myst with a quick running lariat. The two locked up again and this time Styme got the levarage, driving Myst to one knee. Myst had his shoulders pressed to the mat for a 2 count before fighting back. Myst got the advantage and hit an inverted Russian leg sweep. He hit the ropes and missed a big elbow drop. Styme got up quickly and pounced on the fallen Myst with a front face lock. Styme finally let go but simply slapped on a sleeper hold. Myst drifted away quickly and the ref got to the obligatory count and Myst showed some life at the 3rd time to keep the match going. Myst fought his way to an upright position and gave Styme a few shots to the gut before swinging around to hit a belly to back suplex. Myst went up top this time and hit a big moonsault on the fallen Myst. Myst made the cover but only got a 2 count. Myst picked up Styme and whipped him into the corner where he followed with a big splash. Myst followed that up with a few shoulders to the midsection of Styme before hip tossing him out of the corner. Myst went up top as Styme slowly rose to his feet. Myst came off with what looked like a hurricarana (Sp?) but Styme saw it coming and executed a powerbomb. Styme went up top this time and hit a leg drop from the top. He made the cover and got the 1-2-3.
WINNER: Styme via top rope leg drop
SSC: Too bad he didn't take out JLB.
MR: I sense a little tension in the aiiir if you weeeeeeel.
SSC: What do you want? A prize?
JLB: You see that, that was beauty.
SSC: Yeah, anyway, let's go down to the ring where the US title is on the line.
US TITLE MATCH
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Frazer Fury (c) vs. "The Flamethrower" Rob Dalton
Dalton entered the arena first, and got a mixed reaction. Frazer got a similar reaction. The match started off pretty quickly, with a lockup that wasn't won by anybody. Fury blocked a gutkick from Dalton and hit a killer dragonscrew legwhip, and followed that with two dropkicks. Dalton dropped down and slid out of the ring, re-entering from the opposite side. He went for a clothesline, which was missed. Frazer went for the Fury Kick, and missed that. Dalton then hit a double leg takedown, and an elbowdrop. Dalton whipped Frazer into the ropes, and went for a backdrop. Frazer hit a sunset flip for a 2 count, and Dalton kicked out. Dalton charged Frazer, and was armdragged twice, before stopping short the third time and delivering a bodyslam. Dalton then hit two fistdrops, and then went for a chair. The ref didn't stop the match, and just let it go on. Dalton hit Fraze twice in the back with the chair, and Frazer somersaulted the corner, exploding out and hitting a Van Daminator on Dalton(thrust kick to the chair, knocking the chair into Dalton's head). Frazer then went for a spinning Arabian Facebuster and missed. This match was getting pretty insane, and Dalton again had the chair. He took it out of the ring to get yet another, and left that one in the ring. Frazer recovered, and set the chair up in the ring next to the ropes. He bounced off the far side, and Dalton didn't notice him until too late. Dalton held up his chair to swat Frazer, but Frazer jumped onto the set-up chair, and did a somersault WAY over the ropes and smashing himself, Dalton, and the chair into or over the guardrail. Both men got up around the same time, and each had a chair once more. Frazer rolled Dalton into the ring after a punch, and set him up in the corner. He hit a split-legged moonsault and covered, one, two, thr- kickout! Frazer went up top, and Dalton just threw a chair at him, knocking him to the mat. Dalton then suplexed Frazer onto a chair, and then onto the other. The second time, Dalton hit his head on the chair, as did Frazer. Again, both men got up about the same time, and gave each other a look. Dalton then grabbed up a chair, and smashed the referee in the skull with it. He then threw the chair from the ring, and he and Frazer left. Minutes later, "Scrape" by Unsane plays loudly over the speakers, and out come Frazer, Supernova, Dalton, Christian "Devilman" Alicea, and Ghost, all in Asylum t-shirts. Frazer grabs a house mic. Frazer:"We are The SEWF Asylum. And this is just the beginning! Get ready to feel some pain, motherfu*kers!!!"
(The SEWF Asylum then left the ring, as shocked fans looked on.)
WINNER AND STILL US CHAMP:Frazer Fury via DQ (Dalton hit the referee with
the chair, so he got DQ'ed and Frazer didn't)
SSC: Well, I didn't see that coming!
JLB: So, Musty, how do you feel about your son after this Monday?
JLB: You know what? I...I am. I'm sorry, Musty. Don't worry.
MR: Where's my keg? Oh lawd, where's my keg?
SSC: Let's get back to the action with TA in defense against the man we just saw, Rob Dalton.
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Texas Assassin (c) vs. "The Flamerthrower" Rob Dalton
Rob Dalton is introduced first, and he comes out to a mixture of cheers and boos from the crowd. Then, Texas Assassin, the reigining champion is introduced, and he comes out with Dynamite Dave to a huge ovation from the crowd. The two men square off, and all of a sudden PTD music starts playing. Caladan Moore comes out to the surprise of everyone, and he makes his way to ringside, where he sits down right next to the timekeeper. The ref looks at Caladan questioningly, and Caladan grins and spreads out his hands as if to say, "C'mon, start the match already". The ref shrugs, and signals for the bell to start the match. The two men quickly go at it with a series of arm-drags and counters. TA gains the first advantage, as he sends RD off the ropes, and meets him with a big clothesline on the way back. TA Ppicks up RD, and slams him back down to the mat, and follows up with a series of elbow drops. TA then lifts RD, and sends him off the ropes. TA goes for another clothesline, but misses, and RD hits him with a clothesline of his own. RD then goes wild, hitting TA with a series of chops and kicks that leave him battered in a corner. Then, RD whips him into the opposite corner and follows up with a big avalanche. TA is stunned, and RD snap-kicks him to the mat. From there, RD goes up top, and somehow hits a huge splash. He goes for the pin, 1.., 2.., kick-out. RD then picks up TA, and powerslams him back down, holding on for the cover, 1.., 2.., kick-out. TA tries to mount a comeback with a headbutt, but RD quickly drops TA with an elbow smash to the face. Meanwhile, Caladan has gotten up, and is pacing nervously around the ring. RD continues his attack with a high vertical suplex, and ghoes for the pin, 1.., 2.., shoulder up. Frustrated, RD knows he has to end it soon. He grabs TA and puts him in the Katahajame!! The ref goes over to ask if TA wants to submit, but Caladan goes to grab the ref!! Just before Caldan physically restrains the ref, he sees that TA has countered the hold, and has put RD in an armbar. Caladan then drops to the floor, and acts like nothing happened. TA quickly spins RD around, and gives him the Dynamite DDT!! TA covers RD, 1.., 2.., 3. TA wins. Dynamite Dave comes in, and tells TA what happened, and the two stare at Caladan curiously, as he makes his exit.
WINNER AND STILL WORLD CHAMP: Texas Assassin via Dynamite DDT
SSC: If you were involved in that match, Musty, how would you deal with Texas Assassin?
MR: Oh, well, I'd start wit' a clubberin' in da belly-welly. Den' I'd get into a real slobberknocker involvin' his belly-welly. After dat' I'd get up a good head a steam and start workin' on his-
JLB: Belly-welly?
MR: How'd you know dat'? You some sort a mind reader, son? You stay away from me with dat' evil eye now!
SSC: (groan) Let's go to Matt Hammer standing by with a little surprise for everyone. Matt, take it away.
Hammer: Hello Folks and Welcome to the Mothership, I'm Matt Hammer and today we have a very special guest. He was a former coHolder of the first ever SEWF Tag Team Championship Team the Phenomenon and now he's back in the SEWF. It is with great pleasure, I welcome back...."Handsome" Jimmy Cade!!!
hammer:Welcome back Jimmy!
cade:Thanks, Matt it's great to be back in the SEWF.
hammer:Well first off, I think the obvious question is, where have you been?
cade:After Rick and I split Phenomenon, I vowed to get revenge on him for what he did, and well, the SEWF closed and I never got my chance. When the SEWF reOpened, I along with my brother Mark were having family problems which is why we decided not to come back.
hammer:Speaking of your brother, is there any chance that we'll see Mark Wildchild Cade back in the SEWF?
cade:Mark's been busy pursuing other ventures such as the Wildhouse of Wrestling Newsletter which coincidentally is the official Sponsor of the SEWF.
hammer:WOW, very interesting. I'm sure you know that you're former partner Rick Stone is currently in the SEWF and he stated sometime ago that you two were on good terms again, is there a possibility that we could see a return of the Phenom's?
cade:Yes, Rick and I did clear up are differences, but we havent talked on a regular basis. Last I heard, he suffered a knee injury, but thats it. As for as a reformation of the Phenomenon, all I have to say is that the Phenomenon was one of the greatest past SEWF tag teams of all time , however that was the past and this is the present and with the present brings change.
hammer:Change? Can you elaborate?
cade:Matt, the SEWF has changed, society has changed.....everybody and everything changes in life.
hammer:hmmm, if you say so Jim. So, what are your goals here in the SEWF your second time around?
cade:My goals in the SEWF are simple. I wanna be best and I want to be successful. Most of all, I wanna prove to the whole world that Jimmy Cade is here and cannot be stopped.
hammer:lets play quick word association.....NWO
cade:losers
hammer:Bishop
cade:Tough
hammer:Eliminators
cade:Spectacular
hammer:Skullman
cade:different
hammer:David Shaw
cade:Intelligent
hammer:Jimmy Cade
cade:........GOLD
hammer:Thank you Jimmy Cade for joining us and I wish you look with your return in the SEWF
cade:It was my pleasure
SSC: Cade back in the SEWF. Brings back memories of the Phenoms. Those were the days. I'm afraid Musty Rhodes had to leave us. Apparently there was something he needed to do...
JLB: What are you talking about? All he said was "Musty needs me some puddin'." then he groaned and he wandered off.
SSC: I assume he knows what he's doing.
JLB: Really?
SSC: No. Onto the main event!
MAIN EVENT WEAPONS FILLED CAGE MATCH
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"Dark Horse" Caladan Moore w/Christian vs. Destroyer w/Dynamite Dave
The weapons brought to the ring were:
Caladan: A singapore cane, a leather strap, a pair of handcuffs, a frying pan, a baseball bat, and a hockey stick among others.
Destroyer: Three frying pans, a 12 pack, some thumbtacks, a fire extinguisher, a football helmet, a ladder, a police nightstick, and a pair of handcuffs.
The PTD music starts playing over the loudspeakers, and Caladan comes down the aisle, accompanied by the entire PTD who are pushing a wheelbarrow containing Caladan's weapons. They get to the ring, Caladan goes inside the cage, and he sets down hiss weapons as they are handed to him. He has brought a metal cane, a leather strap, a pair of handcuffs, a frying pan, a baseball bat, a toaster, and of course, a hockey stick. Then, Destroyer is introduced, and he is accompanied down the aisle my Texas Assassin and Dymamite Dave, each pushing a shopping cart filled with weapons. Destroyer's weapons are a boom box, a 12 pack of beer, some thumbtacks, a fire extinguisher, a football helmet, a police nightstick, and a stapler. Also, Destroyer himself is carrying a 15 ft. solid metal ladder.He somehow fits the ladder through the cage door, and then brings the rest of his weapons in. The cage is locked, and the bell rings to start the match. Destroyer starts out quickly, grabbing the nightstick, and ramming it into Caladan's ribs. Then, as Caladan doubles over, Destroyer slams the nigthstick into the back of Caladan's head so hard that it splinters (the nightstick, not the head). Caladan goes down like he was shot, and Destroyer goes for the quick win... one, two, kick-out. Destroyer then lifts Caladan to his feet, and whips him off the ropes. when Caladan returns, he is met with a fire extinguisher to the face. Caladan again drops to the ground, and blood starts pouring out of his nose. He rolls into the fetal position in an effort to avoid the shots that Destroyer is trying to give him with the fire extinguisher. While down, Caladan reaches out and grabs the leatehr strap he brought, and wraps it around Destroyer's feet and yanks, pulling Destroyer's legs out from under him. Destroyer hits the ground and loses his grip on the fire extinguisher. Caladan then starts to whip Destroyer with the strap. While rolling out of the way, Destroyer grabs the stapler, and fires a few staples into Caladan's face. Caladan grabs his own face in agony, and Destroyer breaks the stapler across Caladan's already bloody nose. His nose now broken, Caladan collapses to the ground and Destroyer goes for the cover... one, two, shoulder up. Seeking to buy himself some time, Caladan grabs the frying pan, and hits Destroyer in the knee with it. There is a loud "clang", and Destroyer begins to hop on one leg, yeling in pain. Caladan takes advantage of this opportunity to get up, and approach Destroyer with the frying pan, but when he gets there, Destroyer surprises him by stickingsome thumbtacks into the hand holding the pan. Caladan drops the pan, and grabs his hand which is beginning to ooze blood from where the thumbtacks were stuck in. Now mad that he hasn't drawn any blood yet, Caladan begins to let loose. He grabs the now famous hockey stick, and batters Destroyer with it. Destroyer finds himself backed up against a cage wall, and Caladan grabs the handcuffs, and handcuffs Destroyer to the cage! Caladan then throws the keys out of the cage and continues to beat on Destroyer with the hockey stick. Meanwhile, Dynamite Dave runs around the outside of the cage, and gets the keys before a PTD member can, runs back, and unlocks Destroyer. Destroyer collapses to the ground, and the head wound he suffered last week begins to bleed again. Caladan goes for the cover... one, two, thr-kick-out. Now sesning an opportunity, Caldan grabs the toaster, and slams it over Destroyer's head, causing it to start gushing blood. However, before Caladan can do anything else, Destroyer grabs the 12-pack, opens one can of beer, and sprays it in Caladan's face. The alcohol hitting Caladan's open wound causes him to scream in pain, and Destroyer slams the rest of the 12-pack into Caladan's head, knocking him to the ground. Caladan is momentarily stunned, and Destroyer goes for th pin... one, two, thr-shoulder up. Befor Destroyer can gain any more momentum, Caladan grabs the cane, and cracks it over Destroyer's back. As Destroyer staggers around, aladan wipes the blood from his face, grabs the baseball bat, and begins to pound on Destroyer. As Destroyer starts to black out from the repeated blows, he somehow manages to grab the boom box, and shatter it over Caladan's back. Caladan backs off, and Destroyer grabs the football helmet. Caladan swings the bat as hard as he can at Destroyer's head, but Dstroyer has put the helmet on, so the blow barely fazes him. Destroyer then takes the helmet off, knocks the bat out of Caladan's hands, grabs him, and whips him into the ladder. Caladan falls, and Destroyer covers him... one, two, thre-shoulder up. Sensing that now is the time to go for the win, Destroyer sets the ladder up, and begins to climb it, bringing Caladan up with him. When they get to the top of the ladder, Destroyer picks Caladan up as if to bodyslam him from the top pf the ladder. But Caladan grabs Destroyer, and gives him the Perfect Move from the top of the ladder!!! Destroyer is out, and Caladan covers him... one, two, three!! Caladan wins!
WINNER: Caladan Moore via Perfect Move from top of ladder
SSC: Thanks for joining us tonight folks! Obviously JLB has departed in victory so this is Stylin' Steve Chen for Matt Hammer, Musty Rhodes, and JLB signing off. Goodnight everyone!
David Shaw SEWF Prez. wgzz80c@prodigy.com