INT. RESTAURANT - DAY
PORTER and GORDON, sit in a booth across from each other, having lunch.  Porter is twenty-seven with blonde hair, blue eyes and has a great body: the typical "pretty boy" look.  Gordon, also twenty-seven shares the same features, except he's a hundred pounds overweight.  They're dressed in tuxedos.  
GORDON
You gonna  finish that burger? 
Porter picks up the burger and takes a big bite.
PORTER
I thought you were on a diet?
GORDON
Does it look like I'm on a diet?
PORTER
You're never gonna get laid.  
Porter whistles.  A CUTE WAITRESS arrives.
GORDON
What are ya doin'?
PORTER
You'll see.
GORDON
What? No! Porter-
He's cut off.
WAITRESS
Everything okay?
PORTER
Tell ya what if you give me an honest opinion, I'll give you one generous tip. 
The Cute Waitress raises an eyebrow.
PORTER
Would you date this hefty fella? And if you did, would you sleep with him?
WAITRESS
Um... Honesty, I don't have a thing for big guys. 
Porter throws an "I told you so" look at Gordon.
PORTER
Thank you, you've been most helpful.
WAITRESS
I'll bring your check.

 She turns and sashays away.
GORDON
That was not cool.
PORTER
How long has it been?
GORDON
Not that long ago.
PORTER
When?
GORDON
Did you hear about what happened to Stan?
PORTER
That's pathetic.  Don't try to change the subject.
GORDON
So what.  I changed the subject.

Porter frowns and gives in.
PORTER
Yeah... I was there.
GORDON
What a waste of talent. 

They hold up their beers.
GORDON
To Stan.
PORTER
To Stan.
EXT. RESTAURANT - DAY
Gordon trials behind Porter.  He breathes in short, staccato bursts.
GORDON
You think Cage knows?
PORTER
Everyone knows you can't get laid.
GORDON
No, stupid. About Stan.
PORTER
I told him. He was super pissed. 

They stop near a beat-up sedan.
INT. SEDAN - DAY
Gordon gets in, and collapses into the passenger seat.
EXT. RESTAURANT - DAY
The sedan sinks lower on the passenger side.
INT. SEDAN - DAY
Porter gets in behind the wheel.
GORDON
How many times have I told you, you need a new ride.  This is a cheap ass car.
PORTER
It's my cheap ass car. Feel free to get out and walk.
Porter starts the car up and drives away.
GORDON
So how did this whole fiasco start anyway?
CUT TO:
Int. Bank - day
A man being shot in the head during a bank robbery.
CUT TO:
Title sequence / credits
FadE IN:
Int. Office - morning
There's middle-aged man, CAGE, smoking a cigar, sitting down behind a desk.  He has slick black hair and wears a tuxedo.
Someone begins to knock on the door.
Cage
It's open.
Walks in is a man in his early twenties, he has shaggy brown hair, and is dressed very casually.  This is STAN.
CAGE
Come in.  Come in.  Have a seat.   
Stan sits down in front of the desk. 
Stan
Thanks.
CAGE
Did you bring a resumé?
STAN
No, I didn't know you needed one.   I guess I should always have one handy just in case.
CAGE
I'm just kidding.  Cigar? 
STAN
Ah, yes please. 
Cage hands him a cigar and lights it for him.
CAGE
You know why you're here, right?
STAN
I'm the man for the job. 
CAGE
You're one of many, actually.  But let me tell ya, Stan, everyone is real excited to have such a talented young man aboard.  However, I do have a question. Such a smart, logical man such as yourself would know choosing a life of crime isn't exactly the right career choice?
STAN
Yes, but nobody's perfect, right? 
CAGE
What is perfection?  Perfection, something that's complete in its nature.  You drop a ball, it falls.  Human nature, I'm afraid is a little more complicated.  Every single person ever born was perfect.  Hitler was perfect, Ghandi was perfect, even that fucking asshole Bush is perfect.  
Stan lets out a slight giggle. 
CAGE (CONT'D)
We are all individually complete in our nature, whatever that might be.   
Stan
That's an interesting point, never thought of it that way.  I always viewed perfection as a form of optimism.
CAGE
Don't get me started about optimism.  It's for pussies.
STAN