Torn ACL Fantasy Football League

Year established: 1996

Current Owner: John Tracey

Overall record: 50-56-0

Playoff record: 3-4 (2003 Super Bowl champions)

Toilet Bowl record: 2-2 (2000 Toilet Bowl champions)

First round picks: 1996 - Dan Marino, 1997 - Ricky Watters, 1998 - Jeff George, 1999 - Joey Galloway, 2000 - Marvin Harrison, 2001 - Randy Moss, 2002 - Marshall Faulk, 2003 - Donovan McNabb.

The Cheboygan Army Ants were founded by John Tracey in 1996 for the first Torn ACL season. Though unable to attend the draft personally, he did make his selections via cellular phone. His first pick was future Hall-of-Famer Dan Marino and he somehow managed to get Barry Sanders and Terrell Davis on his team. Cheboygan dropped Marino and had a shaky mid-season losing four straight. Tracey managed to pull some strings and finished a strong 4-2 to end up with a 6-8 overall record. His early first round exit, as the Phools squeaked by, ended his hopes of reaching the Super Bowl.

1997 was a whole new year. Armed with an ever changing line-up, the volatile Jeff George, and dark horse Richie Cunningham, John Tracey got his team off to the best start ever at 6-0. Cunningham often won games for the Ants with 16-point performances. Staying true to form as a slaughterhouse owner, first round pick Ricky Watters was cut. A 12-2 finish and a tie for the Eastern Conference title spoke volumes, but their playoff hopes were again dashed in the first round by eventual champ Anchorage.

1998 saw the Carolina Wolfpac enter into existence as the Ants changed name and venue. The familiar face of Jeff George was selected as QB, but he was eventually dropped. Carolina was very streaky, and Tracey's squad failed to get over .500 for the 2nd time in three seasons. Once again, though, they made the playoffs and once again were dumped in round one by a hungry Showboat team. 1999 has the Wolfpac still searching for that first elusive playoff victory.

In 1999, the Wolfpac started a tumultuous season off almost immediately by selecting holdout Joey Galloway with their first overall pick. He was released before he even played a game. An 0-4 start awaited the WCW takeoffs, but they did manage to avoid a league record for futility by putting three wins together. A trip into the depths of Toiletdom awaited, but they somehow avoided a title by defeating the 6-7 Montreal People in the opening round! Former owner of Singapore, Bill McNally, joins Carolina in 2000 as they move to Nashville and look to regain that 12-2 form of '98.

Things looked up for Nashville in 2000, after all Marvin Harrison is a top notch wideout. The NewBlood were shedding some blood in the East, holding firm to second place behind only red hot Tampa Bay during the first half. But things got ugly... The team stalled at 5-5, and Tracey's lineups disappeared. Perhaps a new world order of football players cut by the league's axe-happiest member took over the clubhouse. Regardless, forfeits cost Nashville their last three games, sending them to the toilet bowl yet again. Points wise the NewBlood thumped Philadelphia in the first round, but forfeit helped the Monkeys get out of turds free instead. The final round of men's room fun ended with Anchorage whomping Nashville into the dust, or actually the...you know. So it was to be that John Tracey had finally gone to the john.

By now cities across America know not to get attached to John Tracey teams too easily. After bolting Nashville following his lowest of lows, Tracey settled in Chicago with a new lease on life. (And still was talking of moving the team next year by draft day) With no Blue Ball to trade him to this time, the Wolfpac took Randy Moss at number six, but went as south as Moss' ego is big. A 1-8 start doomed the team's playoff hopes, but a second wind, perhaps sparked by the arrival of a new Tracey (one who mysteriously appeared almost nine months to the day of John's 300 game), took over. The Pac won their last four games and evened out their conference record. And to top it all off he saved himself from embarrassment by raining on Thunder Bay in the first round of canitude. Maybe one day John will settle down, and pick a city to stay in, but that's just not his style.

After years being in the East, but in typical fashion, John packed his bags and headed off to Nishibiwajima to compete in the West division in 2002. Although Marshall Faulk was a disappointment for the year, the Dragons were able to pull off a draft day steal when they traded for Ricky Williams from Sao Paulo. The trade paid huge dividends, as John was able to clinch a playoff spot for the first time since 1998. Unfortunately, the season was cut short by 9 whole yards as the Dragons lost to upstart Lake Valley, and this was despite a monster game from Williams. Nonetheless, it was awesome to see John make the playoffs - now all he has to do is win his first playoff game.