You Say Home Run", I say you're delusional.
Submitted by Leonard Watson

There we were. It was a beautiful spring evening. A slight breeze out to right field, the delightful roar of Hognoxious echoing across the evening air, sun going down, the grass was green (OK, it's turf and it's always green, but I digress), the fans were juiced, the nachos were warming up, the RBI girls were warming up, the fans were...well, you get the idea. Everything seemed perfect. Wichita State was in town riding a good season and they were ripe for the plucking. Little did we know that we were all about to be involved in the biggest paranormal event since O.J. tried to put the gloves on.

Moriarty was pitching, I believe, and was struggling a little. Walked a few, a couple of bad fielding plays and suddenly a run had scored and two men were on. The WSU batter hit what I believed to be a routine foul ball. I turned to see what little kid would lose blood plasma trying to retrieve the ball when suddenly a roar from the crowd yanked my head back around to home plate. To my amazement and disbelief, the umpire was twirling his finger over his head signifying a home run. "Surely you jest," you say. But alas, it was true. I (along with the rest of section 102 & 103) leapt to my feet with a roar of disbelief. (Really it was kind of a gasp...I had a sunflower seed stuck in my throat) The Shocker fans leapt to their feet with a whimper of disbelief. We waited with baited breath for Coach Norm to streak from the dugout. Surely Hognoxious would roast this tadpole of an umpire, this coyote in blue clothing. But it was not to be. Norm just looked disgusted and Smittle looked like he was trying to decide between Poppa John's pizza or a soft pretzel.

We glanced around thinking "Are we crazy?", "Did we really just see that?", "Why are we the only ones yelling?", "Do these pants make my butt look big?" Even the WSU fans had the good taste to look embarrassed. One elderly Shocker fan even commented, "We got robbed just like that last week." Was it fair? Was it foul? Was God giving the Razorbacks a wake-up call? Was he evening the cosmic score for the Shockers? (They do have to live in Kansas after all) I guess we'll never know. Apparently Chuck Barrett thought it was a home run as did Bo Mattingly. As for me, to my dying day, I will declare with vehemence and a clean conscience,

"You gotta' be @#*tting me!! That was foul by 10 feet!!!!"

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