<Chants of asshole are heard>

"Anyway-uh, the Intercontinental champion is back and ready to kick ass again alongside Stone Cold Steve Austin!"

<Booooo!!>

"And no, my wife Stephanie is still suffering from LARYNGITIS and is not here this evening-uhh... So many of you are wondering where I have been these last several weeks-uh. Well you know what? I'm not gonna tell you because none of you people deserve an answer and you can all kiss my intercontinental ass!"

<Booooo!!>

"Many changes have occurred since I was last on TV-uhh. Raisin showed up because he thought he was hardcore enough to join this league. Jericho..." <Yaaaaaaay!!"> "...no, make that Y2GAY..." <Booooo!!> "...is here. All I have to say is for you and that five-toothed freak Benoit to go back to Canada. You can shove hockey sticks up your asses to pass time by if you want, but go back to Canada and await Dub-ya C Dub-ya contracts, because that's where pieces of shit like [BEEEEP (they never get the beep's right...)] belong-uh!"

<Boooo!!>

"Another thing that I've heard is that-uh...."

<Asshole! Asshole! Asshole! etc.>

"SHUT THE HELL UP!!!!"

<Boooo!!>

"Like I was saying, I heard that you people think that I screwed Kurt Angle last week-uhh. You people are saying that I got Stone Cold and Mr. McMahon to attack him and then give me credit for the win. Well that never happened!! There is NOTHING on the record that ever says that!! Kevin Dunn, roll the footage!"

[On the TitanTron, we are shown some guy in a Kurt Angle shirt having some milk and cookies and staring at his medals]

"Oh, look! It's Kurt! He's having his first milk and cookie meal of the day! Look at all the crumbs he got on his shirt! And... what? Is that a.... booger hanging from his nose??"

<The crowd laughs>

"Now what's Kurt doing? Oh! He just saw his reflection in his gold-toned medals! I think it scared him! And now he's choking on his milk and cookies!! Oh! He's convulsing! And look! There I am to perform the Heimlich! And Kurt is saved!

'Thanks Twipo Waitch, if it wasn't for you, I'd be a goner! You're a HERO! A great American hero! I'm so grateful that I'm going to let you pin me!'

'Well Kurt, I guess you're smarter than you look. Cuz you know, I would've kicked your ass and you would've lost anyway.'

'Oh it's true Twipo Waitch, it's true!'

"And there it is! One! Two! Three! So you see, I beat him fair and square! Because I AM THE GAME AND I AM THAT.. DAMN.. GOOD!!"

<Booooooo!!>
 

[And The Game leaves the ring]