An Experience with Sacred Mushrooms
The Divine Within
Dosage : 5.5 g dry Cubensis Mushrooms
After asking for and receiving a rather potent sign, I knew it
was time to
journey once more into the realm of the mushroom. My room mates
had
conveniently vacated for the evening, I had been fasting in expectation
of
the sign I had asked for and when I received it, I was ready.
I started by smoking some unextracted Syrian Rue. No measurements,
I just
smoked it until I felt "stoned" from it. I followed this by invocations
to
the "spirits" to be kind, and not hurt me more than necessary.
I wrote a
quick note to my roomies, cleaned up the living room, and chewed
up my caps,
quickly following them with my prepowdered stems. Total mushroom
weight,
~5.5 grams, dry.
I sat back to await the first effects. Within twenty minutes,
I felt the
first mental twinges, quickly followed by rumblings in my stomach.
I sat on
the couch, in the dark, watching lightning play on the walls.
I began to get
"the twitches" which is usual for me on high dose mushroom/harmala
combinations. These feel like colossal bolts of electricity flowing
through
me. If I go with them they are not unpleasant. At the one hour
point, I was
taking off, and decided to retire to the bathroom. The bathroom
is my usual
location to spend shroom trips for two reasons. First, the toilet
is handy
if I should need to puke (shrooms always make me nauseous) and
second, it is
pitch black, which I find makes my psilocybin visuals incredible.
I entered the inky darkness of the bathroom, and was immediately
struck with
an urge to lie down. The bathtub provides a convenient place for
this I have
found in the past, so into the bathtub I went. The body load was
getting
really heavy, and I didn't feel too hot physically. I started
panting, which
seemed to relieve some of my discomfort. About this time I slipped
into a
trance state, and things got really incredible.
From here on, temporality is merely a guess. This is all reconstruction
based on the notes I wrote the next day and things I have remembered
since.
I probably will not be able to express more than a small percentage
of this
incredible experience.
Almost immediately after slipping into this trance state, I had
what I think
was an entity contact. I remember a distinct sense of other, and
it began
speaking to me, or projecting thoughts and images into my head,
or both. The
one distinct thing I remember is this thing telling me "We are
pleased with
this agents progress" (referring to me) "You will continue". It
made me feel
good to know I had it's approval.
My visuals were beyond visuals. They truly crossed the line into
visions. I
know what people mean when they refer to "vegetable TV" now. The
things I
saw convinced me that reality was nothing but an elaborate OEV.
The things I
saw had as much substance, and more beauty than the things I encountered
in
my day to day terrestrial existence. Everything I saw seemed to
made of pure
energy, or information. The closest approximation I can come up
would be
looking at the world under a black light, only EVERYTHING is fluorescent.
I
saw myself, my friends and family, the mushroom, the universe
in this
manner.
I had some incredible body distortions. One I remember vividly
is a vision
of myself as merely a head, with a single hand on top and a single
foot
underneath, with no body to speak of. I imagined myself twisted
up,
stretched out and rebuilt in a number of bizarre ways. None of
these images
was in any way frightening or unpleasant. They were all rather
fun and
amusing, in fact.
My memory seemed to be laser sharp, and also to work both forwards
and
backwards. I could remember events from my past and future with
perfect
clarity. I also experienced the Eleusisian mysteries, it seemed,
which I
found quite impressive. Simply by thinking about it, I could hear
any piece
of music I had ever heard, like I was listening to the CD. Underworld's
"Dirty Epic" was featured. I thought about trying to relive my
birth, but
never got around to it.
My ego death was profound, but not exactly easy. I had the usual
"I'm dying"
moments, as well as what I can only describe as a few moments
of existential
terror. Once I got past that, I left my body on the floor, became
everything
and nothing, and soared through space (and time, as I mentioned).
I felt
like I had broken through into DM Turner's CydelikSpace, a realm
of pure
existence as information/energy.
Throughout most of this I felt extreme bodily discomfort. This
was
alleviated by panting and/or holding my body in certain positions.
I got the
feeling that I could alleviate this discomfort entirely with a
little work,
which is something I plan to explore in later trips. Sometime
after the
peak, my bodily discomfort disappeared entirely, and after that
I felt great
the rest of the night and into the next day. As I write this,
four days
later, I'm still glowing.
I felt a lot of very positive, loving female energy. It was personified
as
three women who are very important to me, and it gave me a chance
to explore
my feelings for them and be thankful for knowing them.
I was (and am) awed, keeled over, knocked flat by the majesty,
beauty and
power of this trip. The experience was magical and wonderful.
I feel as
though I were given a unique and priceless gift. I felt the utter
joy of the
universe creating itself every second. My overall feeling about
the trip is
entirely positive. This was my most profound psychedelic journey
yet. The
feeling was almost entirely religious, in a way that is head and
shoulders
above my other experiences. I truly manifested the divine within.
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