Back In The Verbal Saddle

March 13, 1999

By Morgan Carlson

The fans (pluralization used for effect) have spoken, and I have listened: it's time for another rap track, courtesy of MC Squared, rhyming legend. This song is called: "Totally Random Shit That Rhymes."

"Here I come, spitting out the shotgun rhymes,
Squared always delivers, like the New York Times.
stole so many lines, it's a god-damn crime,
while the censors keep me quiet like a street-side mime.
But like a bad penny, I always turn up,
dancin' over beats like a Disco Duck.
Back in Conard High, I was a snot-nosed geek,
gettin' roughed up by the jocks every day of the week.
Once they heard me rhyme, though, and checked my words,
they whooped me twice as hard for being such a nerd."

Tony, that shit is GOLD! Lay down a beat for that, and we'll be swimming in champagne and top-shelf honeys.

"Hey Tony, pass me a Korean chick."
"Will do... slide on over, bitch."
Coooooooool.

I've been having a job wall as of late. Rapper? Terrorist? Rapist? It all sounds so wonderful.... but it would be really hard to combine all three without some serious scheduling skills.

"We got a video shoot at 3.... a bomb-building class at 5:30..... and an unwanted gang-bang at 9... damn it, I'm wearing myself thin."

I need a secretary. Any takers?
- Morgan -

ecent.