BY

Sometimes, one just likes to sit down in a relaxed position and just contemplate on various events going on all over. One feels sad, or has a desire to laugh uncontrollably, or feels dejected, agitated, or real mad. A few instances can be narrated.

It has become a general rule that whatever property owned by the rulers who preside over the destiny of 130 million Pakistanys is only for the exclusive use of these rulers. The workers and followers of the ruling party cannot mutter a single desire to use these properties for the party or for themselves. At the same time it is now a common occurrence that the property owned by the government and also by private citizens is and can be used / mis-used by the followers of the party in power. For example, vehicles. Whenever the ruling party high command gives a call for a rally, for a procession, or for celebrating somebody’s birthday or marriage, the traffic police goes into high gear and "requisitions" private vehicles for the exclusive use of party workers.

The blatant violation of the ruling of the Sindh High Court is never on the minds of the protectors of the constitution. The police stations get verbal orders from superiors, who owe their position not to their own merit but to the rulers, and the policemen on the beat try their utmost to exceed the quota of vehicles required. The private vehicle owners have to be on hand to transport the party faithful on their mission. Their vehicles are thoroughly mis-used, the drivers are never provided food, water, or any other facility, and are made to be slaves to the state-sponsored highway robbery. Public buses are favorite targets and the bus drivers who normally harass the citizens by reckless driving, pressure-horn blowing, discourteous service, and breaking all traffic rules, become puppies in the hands of the traffic police.

Interior Minister finally comes to the City of Fading Lights and announces with pomposity that only THREE terrorists remain and then Karachi will be Shangri-La reincarnated. It seems that the Minister has run out of nicknames or he has nearly used up all parts of the facial anatomy. However, to be fair to the Minister, we should take him on his claims and hope that custodial or extra-judicial killings will cease. Just in case, if the Minister feels that more terrorists have to be snuffed and if there are problems with nicknames, he would be advised to contact Anwer Maqsood or Farooq Qaiser of Kaliyan cause they are excellent in naming characters.

The government is determined in getting the MQM supremo out of London and into Hell’s Kitchen, what the local gaols really are. All efforts have been rejected by the British authorities. However, the Saudis demanded and the Britain government has agreed to deport Muhammad al Mass’ari, a vocal critic of the royal family. A British minister cited trade concerns, amounting to billions of dollars, as the motivating factor for this expulsion. The Pakistan High Commissioner tried to make comparisons between both the London exiles, but it really did not get him anywhere.

It is therefore the time for the government to determine what levers to utilize to convince the British authorities to play ball with them. A last-ditch effort must be made and then the government must realize that the only way Altaf Hussein will return to his abode at 90, Azizabad is when he will be escorted in a massive cavalcade of thousands of vehicles and millions of followers right from Jinnah Terminal all the way to the State Guest House. The thinkers and the planners in the government should get into the act and chalk out the strategy. For starters, a few suggestions are made. We should stop playing cricket with the Pommies, or if we do, we motivate our players to beat the daylights out of the England XI. Secondly, we decide to speak English with an American accent and refrain from using British slang or words. Thirdly, we offer moral support to the Welshman or the Scotsman who does not want to stay within the Kingdom. Fourthly, we invite Diana and Fergie on a goodwill mission to Pakistan and make them our Honorary Consuls for two English cities. Finally, we offer the candidature of Khalid Kharal for the post of the Secretary-General of the Commonwealth.

The country has top professionals who run the State Bank and we have senior bureaucrats who manage the Finance Ministry. Unfortunately, they have seldom acted in protecting savers and depositors, and come to the fore when financial scams turn into gigantic proportions. When Samad Dadabhoy and his ilk were masquerading as protectors of the depositors money and handing over 50% interest annually, when they were going full steam on national television alluring innocent citizens to part with their precious wealth, and when they were dining and wining the people in power unabashedly with their cache of easy money, the mandarins in the Ministry and the hierarchy of the State Bank were emulating Rip Van Winkle. When the same opera was being played in Punjab under the garb of cooperative banks, there was no ringing of the alarm bells by those who matter. When a new drama has emerged after taking advantage of the liberalization of foreign exchange dealings, there is not an iota of concern in the minds of the policy makers and the defenders of the Treasury. Forex trading is the new scam. However, this is the game for the rich and those with access to "underground" money. Thousands are, and have been playing the forex game and millions of dollars have been lost by the citizens. The forex companies are reaping a huge bonanza and pretty soon they too will evaporate with all the loot. P.T.Barnum, the American circus impresario, and the brain behind the famous Barnum & Bailey Circus, once said that "there is a sucker born every minute". This is especially true here in this country, except it is the government inertia and lethargy that allows the con men to make hay and get away with it.

Furthermore, some questions still persist in the mind. For example, when the law-enforcers conduct a siege of a locality to flush out weapons, they manage to find just a few. However, once they leave, the air reverbates into a loud symphony of different kinds of gunfire. At the same time, when police routinely stop a yellow cab, they manage to discover a wanted terrorist and enough arms and ammunition to equip an army unit.