Quotes and more...


 

David Letterman's top ten campaign slogans for Jesse

10. He's already used to deceiving the public.
9. Let's get ready to legislate!
8. Building a steroid-enhanced bridge to the 21st century.
7. A man in tights has nothing to hide.
6. C'mon, don't you want to see Newt Gingrich in a chokehold.
5. I'm the only candidate endorsed by Bobby "The Brain" Heenan.
4. Finally, a governor whose shorts glitter.
3. Providing the wise economic stewardship of Hulk Hogan and the progressive policies of Jimmy "Superfly" Snuka.
2. Vote for me, or so help me god, I'll pile drive you.
1. It's the stupidity, stupid.


"Anyway, I've done way more stupid things on alcohol than I have on pot."

-- Jesse Ventura, in a pre-election discussion on the decriminalization of marijuana


"Have you been in there? It's horrible. I mean, I won't even sit on a chair in there for fear that it will fall apart."

-- Jesse Ventura, in response to questions on Rosen Sport's Sunday about remodeling the governor's mansion


"Hey listen, you can body slam me on the fifty yard line if you want to. "

-- Minnesota Viking's owner Red McCombs, in post-election comments to Ventura


"Now I know what Saddam Hussein felt like when those bombs started falling"

-- Hubert "Skip" Humphrey, on his 1998 loss to Jesse Ventura


"Well, finally we have a governor who knows how to execute a flying head scissors."

-- Letter to the editor, Star Tribune Nov. 5 1998


"I suppose I'll be a little bit more popular. And I'll probably get a few more dates."

-- Jesse Ventura's son, in response to a reporters question on Ventura's victory


"It doesn't matter what Jesse Ventura does. Jesse Ventura is irrelevant."

-- St. Paul mayor and Ventura opponent Norm Coleman, early in the 98 campaign


"Well...I hope they're good because being an ex-Navy SEAL, I can lose security when I want to. I'm pretty good at it"

-- Jesse Ventura, on his new 24 hour security watch


"If you can't win fair, cheat!"

-- Jesse "The Body", During the Brutus "The Barber" Beefcake v. "Million Dollar Man" match


"Win if you can, lose if you must, but always cheat."

-- Jesse "The Body" Ventura, during his pro wrestling career

 


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