SELF-ESTEEM by Betsy Hart (Mailtohart@aol.com)

For decades, self-esteem has been viewed in our popular culture as 
an unmitigated good.  It's been presented as a cure-all for a variety 
of social pathologies, particularly violence.  From school rooms to 
psychologists' offices self-esteem has become the Holy Grail of 
personal development. 
    
But now two prominent psychologists have turned such thinking on its head.  
They've shown that an inflated sense of self-esteem can actually cause, 
rather than mitigate, aggressive and violent behavior.  And, it can be 
inferred, a host of other interpersonal problems as well.

Psychologists Brad Bushman of Iowa State University and Roy Baumeister of 
Case Western Reserve University in Ohio say that inflated self-esteem and 
the desire for superiority, or narcissism, could even have something to 
do with the recent tragic spate of school shootings, though they are quick 
to add they have no proof of this.  But in this month's Journal of 
Personality and Social Psychology, a publication of the American 
Psychological Association, they have shown that "aggressive people form a 
subset of people with highly favorable, even inflated opinions of 
themselves."  In other words, it's not the person with low self-esteem 
that is likely to resort to violence to make himself  "feel better," as 
has long been theorized.  Instead it's the person with an emotional 
investment in a grandiose view of himself that is most likely to lash 
out or behave violently when that view is attacked.   

Baumeister and Bushman conducted two in-depth studies of 540 college 
students.  Through a series of experiments they found that those who had 
unrealistically high levels of self-esteem became aggressive when they 
were insulted or criticized, while low levels of self-esteem  did not 
lead to aggression.  

Dr. Bushman said "if kids begin to develop unrealistically optimistic 
opinions of themselves, and those beliefs are constantly rejected by 
others, their feelings of self-love could make these kids potentially 
dangerous to those around them."

Or, as Dr. Baumeister told the Reuters News Service, the work of parents 
trying to build the self-esteem of their children is not always a good 
thing.   "Especially exaggerated or unfounded self-esteem or the desire 
to think you're better than others, this thing of telling kids that they 
are doing great no matter how well they do, giving trophies to everybody, 
having children write stories or lists of all the great things about 
themselves," doesn't help anyone. (In fact, there are no conclusive 
studies that raising self-esteem produces socially desireable or 
beneficial consequences.)  showing that "self-esteem" is in any way 
objectively helpful.)  Baumeister said it's fine to give people, including 
children, a feeling of self-worth, but "If you think you are better than 
you are then you are more likely to get negative feedback, and if you are 
emotionally invested in this then you could get violent." 

Baumeister stated the obvious when he said "conceit as a cause of violence 
is seen in societies around the world."  

But of course you don't even have to look that far.   Just consider the 
office boor who rolls over everybody because his inflated sense of 
self-esteem, once known as arrogance, makes him believe that other people 
matter little.

Baumeister told me that he views lack of self-control as a far bigger 
problem in America than too little self-esteem.   90 percent of Americans, 
he said, rate themselves as better than average drivers.  In a recent 
survey of high school students, not one rated himself as "below average" 
in his ability to get along with others.  Studies show that young children 
consistently have very high opinions of themselves and that they feel 
they should have priority over others.  

He and his colleague buck current politically correct thinking in arguing 
that educators and parents should "forget about self-esteem and concentrate 
on self-control."  But it is clear that a host of problems, like teen 
pregnancy, drug use, and violence are caused by a lack of self-control 
and self-discipline.  And they may even be fostered by an inflated sense 
of self-esteem or "I can do anything and I'm still o.k./I never have to 
feel bad about my actions" thinking.  

So, where does all this "self-esteem" thinking come from anyway?  It 
started with clinical psychology, Baumeister told me, then got into 
schools and families.  "It's easy.  It makes everyone feel good, and 
it's certainly easier than doing your math homework."