I have said over and over that I am not a "pixel-pushing geek". Some of my "friends", however, are not so disadvantaged. Some of them, in fact, are such good graphics weenies that they have endeavored to display their prodigious talents by dressing up my homepage photograph, you know, this one--
This picture, by the way, was taken at one of those "cardboard cutout" places, located about a block north of Mann's Chineese Theater in downtown Hollywood, California. I happened to be there with a friend, and when I saw the The Gipper and Mr. Lipps, I just couldn't resist.
One of my favorite examples is a rather subtle gem, done by my friend Rabin, the same graphics geek who did my "Life Sucks, Get a Helmet Pal" banner--
At the opposite end of the subtle spectrum is one by a guy I know who is the funniest, flakiest, whacked-out woopie cushion this side of Jim Carey. He goes by the handle Stormbringer, and if he weren't a Republican, he would be absolutely unbearable. Check out this monstrosity--
Gee thanks, Stormy. I've always yearned for nice cleavage--just not on myself. One day you will either make a million dollars or get the crap beat out of you, I don't know which.
Of course, Stormy also paused his manic routine of saving lives and making the world a better place long enough to do this--
So, attempting to prove that I can push pixels just like the rest of these bozos, I did my best to return the favor, thus--
Another one that I really like was done by my friend EnIgMa. This one depicts, perhaps, the way most people view me on first impression--
Here are some more enigmatic images from the Minister of Stupid JavaScript tricks...
This one, on the other hand, I am not exactly sure what to make of. It was done by Tyro. It appears to depict aliens, going on an expedition of my gourd. But why any mortal creature would want to undertake such a monumental journey, they would have to explain themselves. One might just as well attempt to explore all of hyperspace--
After witnessing the graphics grossness above, you might not believe it, but I know a guy who possesses actual artistic talent. Check out this wonderful depiction of me by Patches, a true artist and Canadian (no, those are not mutually exclusive terms). Not only does this actually look like me, but it captures my true essence: notice the "skull of a Liberal" that I am using as an ashtray. As much as I like this drawing, I am beginning to tire of how "cute" Patches depicts me. Let me tell you something: I am not cute.
In case you are wondering, none of the above depictions actually reveals the real me. If you want to see me the way I really, truly am, this captures me best--
Thanks for reading, guys, and have a nice day.
| Love, Howard |