STRAW INTO GOLD: PART II
by
Mark A. Kreighbaum and Dennis L. McKiernan

He was young (for a Dragon), was Smael, and good natured... and, it must be admitted, a bit lazy, still living in the lair of his father even though Smael had come into his flame several millennia ago. So, one morning, when his ophidian sire sent him off to burn a few huts in the local village and collect their overdue gold tithe, Smael balked. In the first place, you see, he didn't care much for gold because it was too heavy, hard to store, and was always attracting pests in chain mail. (This opinion would have hearned him a swat in the wing had his father heard it, and so Smael generally kept it to himself.) A more compelling reason, however, was that the smell of burning thatch made him gag.

That morning, in a somber mood Smael flew away from the great Dragonslair high on the steep, raddled slopes of the unclimbable obsidian mountain in a quandary... er, that is, Smael was in the quandary, not the mountain. It was a disagreeable dilemma, for in spite of his allergy to thatch, he had to come up with a pile of gold by dusk, and no excuses. Oh, what was a Dragon to do?

Settling down on a mossy mound in the nearby enchanted forest, Smael pondered his perplexing problem, his brow wrinkled in uffish though (inasmuch as a Dragon can wrinkle a scaly brow).

Of a sudden, a disgruntled ugly little Man came hacking and coughing out from under the mound. ( Smael, you see, had settled down on the ugly little Man's dwelling, his tail covering the chimney, and smoke had filled the undermound house right up.)

"Oi, Dragon!" called th ugly little Man chulishly. "Move your butt. You are sitting on my house!"

Smael, not even taking offense at the rudeness of the ugly little Man, obliged him, saying, "I hadn't noticed, so troubled am I. You see, I need a pile of gold by the eventide."

Upon hearing these words, a crafty look slid over the features of the ugly little Man. "Why, Dragon, I can spin gold from straw... and if you don't believe me, fly up to the castle and ask the Princess, who is no doubt playing with her newborn baby." The ugly little Man ground his teeth in frustration...

But then he smiled an oily smile. "And, Dragon, if you find I am telling the truth, and I am indeed, well then, I'll spin you a pile of gold from straw for your silre to wallow in... but only if you'll give me your firstborn."

Smael's glittering eyes widened. "Why, how did you know that I was to bring the gold to my Dragon sire?"

The ugly little Man laughed a snide laugh. "There's not much I don't know about Dragons, Smael."

Smael's eyes opened wider still. "And how did you know my name?"

Again the ugly little Man grinned an oily grin. "I tell you once more. there's little about Dragons I do not know. Now give me your firstborn and I'll spin the gold from straw."

Smael looked at the ugly little Man. "Say, don't I get to guess at your name or something?"

The ugly little Man's teeth ground in rage and he shook his head violently. "Oh no you don't, Dragon. I've already been fooled by the Princess with that trick.

"No sir. Nothing will do but that you give me your first baby... and by the bye, your Dragon wife is expecting, isn't she?"

Smael started back, surprise in his eyes. "How did you know that, little Man. I mean, we Dragons keep such things private."

"Pfaugh," snorted the ugly little Man. "Did you not hear me? Why, I know practically everything there is to know about Dragons."

Well, to make a long story short(er), Smael flew up to the castle, frightening everyone practically to death, including the Princess and her new baby.

"Oooo, that Rumplestiltskin!" exclaimed the Princess when Smael explained all. "He is a wicked, wicked ugly little Man, if Man he is. But I must confess, he can indeed spin gold from straw."

Smael flew back. "Well, Rumplestiltskin, I suppose that I will give you my firstborn if you spin me the gold. It seems as if I must agree, because, as you sayÐ"

"ÐThere's not much I don't know about Dragons," interjected the ugly little Man, rubbing his hands together in unconcealed glee.

And so Rumplestiltskin spun the gold from straw.

Smael's sire was well pleased with the bounty.

Smael's Dragon wife laughed when she was told that they would give their firstborn to Rumplestiltskin, and she hugged and kissed Smael for being so very clever as to get gold for the promise of the firstborn.

And millenia passed...

And Rumplestiltskin came often to Smael and asked, "Where is my Dragonchild?" and the Dragon always replied, "Soon... Soon..."

And millenia more passed...

And the ugly little Man died of extreme old age...

And millenia more passed...

And finally, Smael's Dragon wife delivered their firstborn into the world... exactly to term.

And as a birthing gift, Smael gave his new Dragon daughter a wheel that spun straw into gold, for after all, she was the rightful heir.

You see, Rumplestiltskin did indeed know much about Dragons, but not everythingÐ there were gaps in his knowledge... the most notable of which you've just learned.