The Lady and the Bank Manager

      A little old lady walked into the main branch of the Chase Manhattan
      Bank holding a large paper bag in her hand.  She told the young man at
      the window that she wished to open an account with the bank and
      deposit the $3 million she had in the bag.  She said that prior to
      doing so she wished to meet the president of the bank due to the large
      amount of money involved.  The teller opened the bag and saw bundles
      of $100 bills and thinking this a reasonable request telephoned the
      president's secretary to make an appointment for the lady.

      Later the lady was escorted upstairs and ushered into the president's
      office.  Introductions were made, and she stated that she liked to get
      to know the people she did business with on a more personal level.
      The bank president then asked her how she came into such a large sum
      of money and whether it was perhaps an inheritance.  She replied "No,
      I bet on people."  Seeing his confusion she explained that she just
      bet different things with different people.  All of a sudden she said,
      "I'll bet you $25,000 that by 10:00 a.m. tomorrow morning your balls
      will be square."  The bank president figured that she must be off her
      rocker but decided to take her up on the bet.  He didn't see how he
      could lose.

      For the rest of the day he was very careful.  He decided to stay home
      that evening and take no chances, after all, there was $25,000 at
      stake.  When he got up in the morning and took his shower he checked
      to make sure everything was normal.  There was no difference.  He
      looked the same as he always had.  He went to work and waited for the
      little old lady to come in at 10:00 a.m., humming as he went.  He knew
      that this would be a good day.  How often do you get handed $25,000
      for doing nothing he thought!

      At 10:00 a.m. sharp the little old lady was shown into the president's
      office.  With her was a younger man who she introduced as her lawyer.
      She said she always took him along whenever there was this much money
      involved.  "Well, " she asked, "what about our bet?"  "I don't know
      how to tell you this," he replied, "but I'm the same as I've always
      been, only $25,000 richer!"  The little old lady seemed to accept this
      but insisted that she be able to see for herself.  The bank president
      thought the request reasonable and dropped his trousers.  She
      instructed him to bend over and then she grabbed hold of him.  Sure
      enough, everything was fine, but then the Bank President looked up and
      saw the lady's attorney across the room, banging his head against the
      wall.  "What's wrong with him?" he asked.  "Oh, him?", she replied.
      "I bet him $100,000 that by 10:00 a.m. this morning I'd have the
      president of the Chase Manhattan Bank by the balls.
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Last updated: November 13, 1997

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