The Italian Who Went to Malta

One day ima gonna Malta to bigga hotel. Ina Morning I go down to eat
breakfast. I tella waitress I wanna two pissis toast. She brings me only
one piss. I tella her I want two piss. She say go to the toilet. I say you no
understand. I wanna to piss onna my plate. She say you better not piss
onna plate, you sonna ma bitch. I don't even know the lady and she call 
me sonna ma bitch.
  
Later I go to eat at the bigga restaurant. The waitress brings me a
spoon and knife but no fock. I tella her I wanna fock. She tell me
everyone wanna fock. I tell her you no understand. I wanna fock on
the table. She say you better not fock on the table, you sonna ma bitch.
I don't even know the lady and she call me sonna ma bitch.
  
So I go back to my room inna hotel and there is no shits onna my bed.
I calla the manager and tella him I wanna shit. He tell me to go to toilet.
 I say you no understand. I wanna shit on my bed. He say you better not
shit onna bed, you sonna ma bitch. I don't even know the man and he
call me sonna ma bitch.
   
I go to the checkout and the man at the desk say: "Peace on you". I
say piss on you too, you sonna ma bitch, I gonna back to Italy.

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Last updated: November 13, 1997

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