* * *

I wave to my parents as their car pulls out of the driveway of our duplex. It is a red brick house, and ours is on the right. Our neighbors in the other side are the Downey’s. We each have a carport, an attic, and a garden bed on each side of our front door. We both have a balcony held up with white pillars. We share a basement, which you must go outside to get into. My room is on the first floor. The front yard is small, but our backyard is huge. It is wintertime and the evening sky is already pitch-black. A dense white fog curls around everything, obscuring my vision.

My two-year old sister, Katie, peeks out from behind my legs, "Byebye mamma, byebye dadee." Her sweet piping voice now has a tremble and her lips pout. But the sound of it still brings a smile to my face. Katie is my pride and joy.

I bend down so my face is level with hers. "It’s okay, Katie," I say soothingly. "Mom and dad are going to see a movie."

"Moo-ee?" Katie asks.

"Yes," I reply. "They’ll be home soon."

"Ho soon?" As much as I love my sister, her habit of repeating people annoys me.

"Yes," I say. "Play with your ball." I lug the white garbage bag to the corner and try to stuff it in the already bursting can. Katie bounces her ball. Her giggle floats and echoes. I shiver.

Inside I hear the TV being turned on. "Tim!" I call to my younger brother. "You need to finish cleaning your room before you watch TV!"

"Well, what if I’m done?" he replies cautiously.

"Yeah right. An hour ago I was up to my knees in the junk. No way have you finished it."

He groans and I know he’s going to try to bribe me. I cut him off before he starts. "No. Now, Tim." I hear the TV being turned off as Tim plods heavily upstairs, moaning about the injustices of the world.

Alone with my sister, I feel uneasy. My town is infested with gangs. Almost all the teenage boys in my class belong to one gang or another.

My sister shrieks as the ball slips from her grasp and slides down the slanted pavement of our driveway. She frowns and runs after it, her little feet causing echoes.

A car turns on our street.

The ball rolls into the road and Katie starts to follow it. I grab her shoulders, halting her in her tracks. She twists against my grasp, squealing in frustration.

The car cruises slowly down the street. It approaches our house.

I glance up and see the boys before I hear them, the telltale colors of local gangs flashing before my eyes.

Oh no! Let me wake up!

One boy…has something…in his hands…what is it? I crane my neck to see. It’s something…it looks like…no!

As the boy raises the gun everything goes into slow motion.

I shield my sister, praying to God to do what he wanted with me, but to just spare my sister! A crack sounds and the cold metal of a bullet rips into my chest. I fall, my head slamming against the pavement. My vision blurs…the pain! It’s excruciating! Never have I hurt so bad…everything is so loud…the boys’ raucous laughter…my sister sobbing…another crack. To my horror, I realize Katie lies exposed. I try to protect her but I can’t move.…my vision blurs…..everything goes black.

Why can’t I wake up?

I feel a pulling, and suddenly I am out of my body. I’m floating in the air, and yet I’m still on the pavement in a pool of bright scarlet blood. I look down and see Katie crumple, her pitiful sobs being cut off as a red stain spreads across her chest.

Another bullet enters my body before the boys speed off, and the pain my physical body feels jerks me back into it. Now I am just one, and the pain is worse than anything. I black out.

I drift in and out of consciousness, lying on the pavement. Using the last of my strength I try to touch Katie. She is still, not breathing, her body cooling. A wave of despair and anguish washes over me. A cool rain falls, as if God is crying with me. As I gaze at the stars in the sky, unable to move, I wonder if I am going to see God.

I don’t know how much time passes, but the rain stops. I hear a car turn on our street. Have the boys returned? I am too weak to even tense, and I pray it is not them. Through my blurred vision I see my parents’ blue van pull up. I struggle to keep my eyes open. I feel cooling hands lift me and I succumb to the darkness.

When I wake again, I am in the hospital. The sterile white halls are such a contrast to the blackness I have been in, that I am dizzy. The steady beep of the heart monitor comforts me, but I know I don’t have much longer. A stillness comes over me, a great calm. I am detached from my body. The heart monitor beeps wildly. The room is a flurry of activities as doctors and nurses frantically try to revive me. I silently weep, knowing it is useless. I turn at a familiar voice, and Katie is there, her spirit shining. I take her hand, and together we ascend to the light above.

* * *

I wake gasping, my eyes wide, sweating. This time the nightmare was more vivid, more real. I shake, thinking how vulnerable we all are to the real life violence out there, how real people suffer the anguishes in my dream. It’s so pointless. As I look to the sky I thank God for another day of life.

Diana Matthews, age 13