Relationships
Everyone has experienced a relationship in some way. Whether it be with a lover, parents, a friend, co-workers or an animal. I don't think there is a person out there who can say that any relationship is easy. They are very hard to maintain. I have been through some really rough relationships with many different people, all of which have been hard. Some of them have ended, and some of them continue to flourish. Some flourish naturally and some will always require alot of work. I am not saying all relationships are bad. I don't think any relationship is bad. They are all learning experiences and if it weren't for those experiences, I wouldn't be the person I am today. In this particular section of my site, I am going to let you know about the relationships I am in, the ones that have ended, and how I am working through some of the greatest pains in my life. I know there is someone who is having a hard time dealing with some type of relationship. I know there is someone who is having a hard time getting over a rough relationship. I am not certified in this field, however, I have been through and am going through some really challenging relationships right now. I know there is no one right way of dealing with or getting through relationships, but the things that I have done have really changed my life and the way I look at things. I hope that through my experiences, I could possibly help someone else who is going through or will go through some similar experiences as mine.
First I would like to let you in on a particular love relationship that I have went through that was really difficult. As a matter of fact, this was one of the hardest things I had to go through in my adult years so far. I am a guy with a lot of feelings. I am not a hard guy who has no cares in the world. I have always been a person who thinks about everyone else before himself. From this relationship, I have learned to start to care about myself and not worry about what others think or say.
Four or five years back, I met a girl from a mutual friend. She had just gotten out of a six year relationship and was very vulnerable. She really didn't have any friends and of course, I opted to be there to help her get through this. We did everything together. We went to the movies, we went to dinner, we hung out. She couldn't thank me enough for everything I did for her. When I would go away with my family on the weekends, we would miss each other's company so much. We completed each other in every way possible. A year later we found ourselves in a romantic relationship. It happened by accident. One night we were watching a movie on her couch and we both looked at each other and started to kiss. I couldn't believe it happened! I was so shocked and yet so happy. We talked about it and decided that we might as well try it out because, we were so close that if anything went wrong, we would surely remain best friends. She was never fond of my friends so I stopped hanging out with them. I spent every moment possible with her. After a year, I started to miss the company of my friends and I found myself wanting to be with them more and more. The relationship ended shortly after that. I started to see my friends again and I was having a ball. Four months later I got into a really bad car accident. The shop where I put my car was a few blocks away from where my ex-girlfriend lived. On her way to work one morning, she saw my car and got nervous. She asked her mother to call me to find out what happened. Her mother called that day and asked me to come over her house and talk. I went there and her mother and I talked for hours. The next day I called my ex-girlfriend at work and asked if she would like to go to dinner that night. She said yes so we went out and caught up on each other's lives. A few weeks after that, we decided to give the relationship another shot. This time around we fell completely in love with each other. We got so much closer than we had ever been. I never experienced a love like that in my life. She was my best friend, and my lover. Whenever I had a problem she would sit there and listen and then offer her suggestions. She helped me through every obstacle I was confronted with. I helped her the same way. We got so close to each other's families. We went on vacations together. We did everything but live together. We dedicated everything and anything to each other. It was like a match made in heaven. We thought we were meant for each other so we decided to get engaged. We had our share of problems but never got over them quickly. She has a very sensitive nature and I loved to tease and make jokes. I never took her seriously and her feelings would get hurt. Then the "friend" issue started to rise again and more fights broke out. It seemed that every issue turned into a fight. The fights went on for what seemed like forever. There was nothing else to do but to call off the engagement and try to start fresh again. Things remained the same for the next couple of months. Within that time, I found my spirituality. I was beginning to see things in a different light. Of course, that too was the cause of numerous and arduous fights. It seemed that everything I did failed. I tried to change. I tried to change her. To no avail, nothing worked. The fighting continued. Sometimes they were small arguments. Sometimes they were nasty, brutal fights. The time finally came when I said enough is enough. I didn't think it was fair for us to have to be unhappy. I was battling with myself. I started to gain weight and my face started to break out. I started to look a mess and anyone could tell that my world was falling apart. I was torn between the woman that I loved with all my heart and the person who I love more than anything. Me! Finally I realized that I was more important than any relationship. On a cloudy Saturday evening, I picked her up from work and, in the car, I told her that we should call it quits. She remained quiet and silently agreed. We went back to her house where I gave her back everything I had of hers. She then gave me back my ring. I knew it was time to say goodbye. I was very hesistant. I did not want to leave. As I stood there by the door and felt the tears roll down my face, I pictured everything I tried so hard for slip right through my hands like grains of sand. We both stared at each other and I told her I loved her and left. While driving in my car I finally exhaled. I knew that instant I did the right thing. After that realization, the tears came quickly out. I cried straight for about an hour. Oh, how I missed her. I couldn't believe it was over. It took all the strength in my body not to pick up the phone and tell her how stupid I was. After a couple of days, I decided I should call to see how she was holding up. Just like myself, she was a wreck. We talked and talked and I still held strong my belief that I did the right thing and the two of us were not meant to be together. I hung up the phone and that was the last I heard from her. I felt totally at a loss. I didn't know which way to turn. I knew deep down that I needed some type of professional help. I sought out a psychotherapist. I started up weekly sessions. That was the greatest move I ever made. I realized so much about myself. I found out the reasons why I did the things I did. I learned how to deal with the feelings going on inside of me. I felt like my life was beginning all over again. I started the Herbalife diet and lost 25 pounds. My face cleared up almost instantly. I no longer felt stress. Everytime a thought of her came to me, I knew how to deal with the feeling and tackle it. My sprituality also played a hugh part in the healing process. It helped me to use the energy of the universe to heal opened wounds. I still think of the good times we shared together. I look back on everything that happened as a learning experience. I am now taking care of myself. I have come a long, long way and I still have long way to go. I have never felt better and I have never been happier. I have no regrets whatsoever. I wouldn't trade my experiences for anything.
The ending of a romantic relationship is the not the end of one's life. It is a learning experience to be applied to different areas of life. As one gets older, one gets wiser. They owe all their wisdom to their experiences. I want everyone to know that there is always someone there to talk to about relationship problems. I am here. You could always reach me via e-mail.I would love to help any way I can.
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