That ain't love

Stairwells carry sound real well.  Logan stood at the first floor and
listened to Remy and Rogue argue on the third.  He didn't want to be
hearing it but he didn't have much choice - and he'd been listening to
a few of them over the past month or so.

"- going out, sugah?"

"Why you t'ink?"  Remy said, voice far to miserable for someone
planning on a night on the town.  "So you're not even going tah try an
straighten up?"  Rouge hissed.  "Just going tah go somewhere else and
get more - more messed up!"

"Remy ain't messed up - dis isn't about bein' messed up!"

"And how yah know that Rems?"  Rogue's voice was rising, as it always
did when she was upset.  "What've you got tah base it on?  Raised a
thief?  Marrying an assassin?  No wondah yah so screwed up, Rems!"

"You leave Remy's family out a dis!"  Remy shouted suddenly and Logan
winced, hearing Scott's squeaky door open on the second floor.  "Dey
care for Remy - more than you, cherie - they don treat Remy like a
freak -"

"Yah not a freak!  Yah got problems - I wanah help yah - that ain't no
love yah family got if they go letting yah hurt yahself!" Rogue
shrieked.  "Why aint' ah not surprised, Rems.  N'Oleans nuts - all ah
yah!  It's not normal ahm telling yah!  I love yah and I'm not gonna
keep screwing yah up like everyone else!"

"All kinds of people do dis!"  Remy was shouting now to, trying to
drown out Rogue's tirade about family and normalcy.  "It's not fucked
up, cherie!  You jus' too inhibited - w'at you want?  Married and
living in the su'burbs wit two kids an a dog?  Dat normal enough for
you, eh?  You dink running around in spandex normal?  Take a look in de
mirror, cherie - you not normal.  Remy not normal.  Normal ain't w'at
we are!  W'at Remy got is jus' a little quirk -"

"Quirk - its sick sugah!"

"That's enough, both of you!"  Scott's broke in on the brief pause
while the two combatants caught their breath.  He was standing on the
second flight of stairs, wrapped carelessly in a robe.  Logan smiled,
scenting the sex in the air.  It was early yet to be in bed and Scott's
hair was tangled in the classic 'I was having sex until you disturbed
me' style. "You need to take this disagreement into a room."

"Or another state."  Logan growled under his breath and began to climb
the stairs.  Doors slammed.  Scott and Jean's on the second floor.
Rouge then Remy's on the third.  Logan hesitated at the third floor,
scratched the back of his neck and sighed.  Rogue was crying.  Rogue he
couldn't do anything about, they'd never gotten along and she didn't
have many friends - any friends - here.  Maybe it was time to drop a
dime to her mom.  Remy - he sighed again.  The kid didn't deserve to be
put through this.  And it was half his fault.  It was like a fucking
soap opera.

He shrugged out of his damp coat and headed down the hall to Remy's
room and knocked on the door.

"Remy don' want talk no more!"

"It's me, kid."  Logan said quietly.  "Open t'door."

He listened to Remy shuffle around then open the door.  One red and
black eye peered warily out.  Logan kicked the door lightly and Remy
sullenly let him in.  Logan leaned against the shut door while Remy
went back to slump on his bed, mouth tight and face blank.

"You look like y'gonna explode there, kid."   Logan said.  "Told ya
already ya gotta let it out."

"Everyone tellin' Remy w'at to do!"  Remy snapped, flipping a pair of
sunglasses restlessly from hand to hand.  Boy was dressed to please,
white silk so thin Logan could see the shadows of dark nipples.  Snug
low slung white pants, white sneakers, no socks.  You woudn't think a
bit of bare ankle would be such a turn on but there it was.  Hitting
all the buttons.  Logan set his jaw, quieting his first impulse.  He
wanted to put Remy over his knee and spank him until the boy let some
of that anger out, until he was red and wailing.  Then he wanted to
fuck him until there wasn't any strength left in either of them.  "Remy
know how to get w'at he wan'ts!"

"I don't doubt it, gumbo."  Logan said.  "And I'm not here t'tell ya
what t'do."

"W'at den?"

"Come here, kid."

Remy stared rebelliously at him.

Logan gave him a wry grin.  "Indulge my dominant side and get the hell
over here."

Remy stood and slunk over with a deliberately tempting sway of his hips
but it wasn't desire that moved him but anger.  Logan gritted his teeth
and ignored it.  The damn kid was a hazard.  When the tall thief was
close enough, Logan snatched a handful of that loose hair and dragged
the boy close.  Remy tensed, resistant.

"Ssh."  Logan eased his grip to stroke the fine brown hair.  Whispered
in the kid's ear.  "I just wanna tell ya that ya ain't alone kid.
Y'got people y'can go to - you understand me?  Don't go thinkin' that
y'gotta handle everythin' by yerself."

"Dis my problem!" Remy hissed.  "I can handle dis.  Jus lover's t'ing,
eh?"

Logan sighed.  "If you say so, kid.  I ain't gonna butt in but my door
ain't locked.  Neither is 'Ro's  Got that?"

Remy breathed shakily for a moment then managed a nod.  Logan let him
go.

"T'anks, Logan."  Remy said as Logan turned to go.

"Sure."

***********************

So maybe Logan had the cure.  Remy zipped his sweatjacket up and headed
outside, glaring at the spring drizzle.  Hated New York.  He wanted to
go home so badly.  See his family.  See his wife - god, yes.

Followed the sound of chopping to where Logan was turning big pieces of
wood into little pieces of wood.  He sat on a stump and smoked for a
while, watching the big man.  Felt that sinking desire, skin memory
telling him how it would feel to touch that man, tasted him, open
himself up and submit.  Logan grunted and stopped.

"What y'want, kid?"

"Talk me."  Remy replied.

Logan grunted again , gathered an armful of wood in one hand, the axe
in the other and headed to the woodshed.  "Bring some of that cut
wood."

Remy gathered up a resinous armful, cigarette dangling from the corner
of his mouth and followed the shorter man.  Watched that solid ass, in
dusty old jeans, not sleek black leather and remembered how good Logan
felt.  How good Logan made him feel.  He shook his head and drew hard
in his cigarette, he was here to talk about his girlfriend and all he
was thinking of was Logan's ass.

They stacked the wood in the dim little shed in silence.

"Pull up a seat."  Logan said, nodding at a stump.  "Careful with the
smokes in here, gumbo."

Remy nodded and fiddled with some wood chips, studying the floor.
Logan sat patiently.

"Don know what t'do, cher."  Remy finally broke the silence.  His
throat tightened suddenly.  "Remy love Marie, femme love me.  Still -
everyt'ing falling apart!"

The thief shoved a hand into his mouth, startled by the sudden tears.
He gulped and swallowed the sobs down.  "Remy trying!  Dieu - trying so
hard, homme!  Why can't Remy get dis right?  Why always screwing de
importan't t'ings up?"

"Y'ain't screwing nothing up, gumbo."  Logan said, snapping a bit of
bark between his fingers.  His face was still and Remy couldn't feel
anything from him but the other man's steady presence.  The Canadian
was using his old training to block Remy's empathy.  The thief stared
suspiciously at Logan.

"Oh, sure, homme.  Everyt'ing perfect -"

"Not what I said."  Logan shifted uneasily.  "I been hearing some
o'what's going on.  Can't help it."

Remy flushed.

"Y'told Rogue -"

Face darkening further, Remy nodded.  "Took de femme to a club - de
Parlor.  Mild, eh?  And she - not like it, non.  Not at all.  We fight
eh?  No new t'ing but dis - dis - not de same.  Said some terrible
t'ings, both of us."

"Y'never introduced anyone t'the scene?"  Logan asked.  "How'd y'get
started?"

Remy smiled.  "Me and m'wife.  Jus fell into it, eh?  So easy.  Fun.
T'ives and assassins know a bit 'bout tying' up, oui."

His smile faded.  "Someone gonna hold me, oui?  Want t'hold Remy so
much.  We fight too, Bella  an Remy.  But - making up, eh?  Dat's real
good.  Me and Marie - dere's no making up like dat.  You eh, how you
start?"

"Hell if I know, kid.  Maybe in Japan -"

Remy looked up, surprised.  "You an' Mariko?  Do dis?"

Logan shook his head.  "Not me an'Mariko.  No time for it.  Never had a
chance to find out if it was somethin' she wanted.  Didn't even think
of it, really.  Then - she died."

"How you do it?"  Remy wailed suddenly.  "How you not get screwed?
W'ant be with Marie, me.  How I get rid of it!"

"Ahh, kid."  Logan shook his head sadly.  "Y'know better than that.  It
ain't gonna go away.  It's part o'what makes you tick.  Somthin' ya
need."

"Marie say Remy sick!"  Remy cried, blinking furiously.  "Make me
ashamed!"

"Oh, Jesus -"  Logan swept him up, crushed him close and Remy  finally
sobbed.  It's what he'd been wanting, Logan to hold him.  Hard.  "You
ain't got nothin' t'be ashamed of!"

"Never feel dis way - like der's something wrong w'Remy!"  He curled
down, pressing hard to Logan's solid body.  Made himself smaller,
tucked his head into Logan's shoulder and just - sobbed.  "She make me
feel so bad - so bad.  Remy love her and she make me feel so - dirty!"

Logan rocked him back and forth, big hand stroking his back.  Remy
cried harder when he realized he couldn't do this with Marie.  He
didn't feel like he could let himself go with her.  Knew he couldn't.
Logan - he trusted more than he should maybe.  But he knew Logan
wouldn't turn him away.  Didn't make him feel dirty.  Made him feel -
sheltered.  Safe.  He loved Marie but he trusted Logan.

Logan was rumbling something in his ear about letting go.  It's
alright.  I got you.  That's it, boy.  Remy shivered.

"Remy -"  Logan's voice so close to his ear that his breath raised
Goosebumps.  "Y'can't let her do that t'ya.  Anythin' else.  But don't
let her make y'feel ashamed.  It's poison.  It'll poison both o'you
until y'can't stand each other.  Shit - boy - anythin' else but that
y'can handle.  Shame - it's a killer.  Y'got nothin' t'be ashamed of.
Y'ain't hurting no one w'what y'like t'do and it's part o'ya just like
y'hair and y'eyes.  Don't matter where it come from."

"Don you feel ashamed?"  Remy whispered.  "Y'like t'hurt people.  Gets
y'hard t'hurt people!"

Logan sighed, Remy felt him flinch but he didn't push Remy away.  "I
got plenty I'm ashamed of, kid, but not that.  Yeah I mark people -
hurt 'em - and yeah it turns me on. But I ain't doin' harm.  I like
taking people out a'their world and turning them into nothing but a
bunch o'nerve endings -"

Remy shivered, body heating at Logan's words.

"I strip 'em down to nothing but skin and heat an' need and play w'em
'till that's all there is in their universe.  Lift 'em up outa
themselves.  Show 'em they can fly.  Y'know - y'know what I'm talkin'
about -"

"Boss - s'v plait - boss."  Remy moaned, suddenly, agonizingly hard.
Logan's breath was hot on his neck.  He shifted, kneeling on the floor,
thighs spread around Logan's work boot.  He thrust, grinding against
the other man's shin. "Need dat so much -"

Logan turned his face up, stared hard into his eyes, then kissed him.
Rough and Remy just melted into the sharp teeth and demanding tongue.
God, he didn't' feel dirty.  He felt - he felt - like he'd do anything
to please Logan.  And he needed to come so bad.  Needed Logan to tell
him he could.  Make him.

Logan wrenched his hands behind his back and Remy cried out,
struggling.  Arched his back, mouth open, eyes closed.  The other man
growled and threw Remy over a stump, twisting a hand in his hair.

"Spread y'knees, brat."  Logan snarled.  Remy, eager to feel anything
but miserable, obeyed.   The Canadian hunched on top of him, crushing
the slender thief against the wood.  Remy panted, relaxing in the dust
and dimness, secure under Logan's hard weight.  He could feel Logan's
erection against his ass and he nearly wept with longing and relief.
"Let me tell y'somethin' and ya pay attention."

"O-oui boss." Remy whispered.  Logan's hand tightened in his hair,
wrenching his head up.  Remy moaned and writhed mindlessly.

"Y'a beautiful boy an' ain't no one got th'right t'tell ya otherwise."
Logan growled in his ear.  "You hear me boy!"

"Oui - ah - s'v plait, oui!"

Logan thrust against Remy's ass.  "That's right, pet.  Y'a beauty.  Put
ya' in a show and y'win best o'breed.  Y'think I don't know what I'm
talking about?"

"Boss - "  Remy whined, rocking helplessly, thrusting against the wood.
Hardly able to think past the ache of his cock.  Wanted to do anything
to please his boss.  "You de boss.  You know."

"Nothin' fer y't be ashamed of."

"Non."  Remy agreed.  "Boss - s'v plait, come now?  Let me come now?"

"I'll tell y'when y'can come!"

"Need!"

"I know what y'need, pet."  Logan murmured against the sweaty skin of
his neck.  Remy whimpered and his hips hitched uncontrollably.  He was
so desperately close.  He spread his knees wider, grinding his ass back
against Logan.  Needed this, oh god he needed this.

Logan's hand pushed under him and Remy moaned loudly as his zipper was
pulled down.  Hands pinned behind his back, trapped under Logan's body,
he couldn't do anything but submit.  Logan pulled him from his pants,
the touch of his fingers making Remy whimper and squirm.  Logan
shifted, pressing Remy carefully against the rough bark of the
treestump.  Remy blinked and gasped, flinching.

"No - pet."  Logan pressed him back, shifted his weight to guide Remy,
force him to push against the scratchy bark.

"Boss - boss, ah - s'v plait!  Too rough - dat!"  Remy whispered,
pleading.  Couldn't' help but move into the sensation on his desperate
cock though.  By now, anything felt good.  Logan shifted, spreading
Remy's thighs wider with his knees.  Began to move the thief, forcing
him to rock against the log he was draped over.

"That's right."  Logan crooned.  He stroked Remy's back as the thief
surrendered and let Logan move him.  "Gonna make y'come like this."

"S'too much, boss."  Remy shivered, sensitive skin over stimulated by
the rough bark.  But he couldn't stop.  Sensation rough and scratching,
sharp, prickling.  He ground harder against the bark.  Groaned.  He was
leaking all over the wood.

"No it ain't. You be my good boy and fuck that wood for me."

Remy wailed softly, struggling.  Needing.  Humped the log, hands
pinned, hair falling into his face, panting louder and louder.  Riding
the scratch and ache and the shameless, wicked pleasure.  Logan was
watching him fuck the log like some kind of animal in rut.  Remy
moaned.

"Good pet."  Logan's voice was deep.  "So pretty like that.  You come
for me.  Come for me like that.  Thats - thats it - thats it - come -
let it out - "

Remy cried out, bucked.  He screamed briefly at the rough stimulation
and came, moaning in relief.  Still hazy, Remy was pulled around and
then Logan's hand was in his hair, guiding him.

"Open wide, pet."

Remy obeyed, eyes fluttering as hot flesh slid into him.  He sucked
instinctively.  Logan groaned.  "Ohh, shit - yeah boy.  You just suck
me."

The thief gathered himself, pants still hanging open, and bent his
head.  Relaxed and let Logan's cock slide all the way in until he nose
was buried in dark hair.  Sucked, stroked.  Logan fucked his mouth.
Hands tight in his hair and Logan's thrust getting faster, Logan's
breathing loud and harsh in the woodshed.  Remy was dizzy, lost in the
smell of fresh sap, musty wood, strong musk.  Remy just gave himself
over to it - beautiful cock, thick and hot and good - and Logan groaned
and he was filled with the sour taste of the man's come.  Remy
swallowed, milking gently, hungry.  Let the softening shaft slip from
his mouth to nuzzle wetly at the furred balls.  Kiss the twitching tip
of Logan's cock.  Wanted to stay like this forever.

"Y'gotta find a way t'get what y'need, boy."  Logan said quietly, with
Remy's face still between his legs.  "Either from Marie or from
somewhere else.  She loves ya, but she's gotta be willin' t'try."

2.
Remy was sprawled on Marie's bed, waiting for her to come back from the
shared shower down the hall.  Had to try again.  Had to keep trying
because he wasn't going to give up.  He grabbed one of the silly
stuffed toys on Marie's bed.  A green frog.  Toad.  Beside it was the
blue snake.  Mystique.  Other toys had other names, the red eyed
kitten.  Scott.  The satin parrot.  Jean.

The thief sorted out the toys, arraying the two sides, glancing up to
meet Marie's smile as she came in.  She dropped onto the bed, wet hair
wrapped in a towel and picked up the snake.

"Mah mom called."  She said.  "Wants for me to visit."

"Oui? Gon go?"  Remy moved the ratty old wolf to the fore of the
tactical position he'd built.  Wolverine.  Didn't set him up against
the yellow lion this time, sicked him on the green frog.  Marie
countered with the blue snake disguised as the satin parrot.  Remy
snorted.  The wolf fell for that one every time.

"Don't know yet, Rems."  Marie decimated the thief's toys.  The old
wolf survived, as always.  Remy rolled onto his back and tucked the toy
under his chin.  "What do yah think?"

"Remy dink we still got taking to do, cherie."

Marie sighed.

"Or we can wa'it until somt'ing come up and we fight, non?"

"Okay, okay - fine.  What do yah want to say?"

Remy frowned.  "Dat Remy not sick - let Remy finish!  Not sick - dat
you can b'live it but Remy don.  And Remy - need dis t'ing."

"Remy!"

The thief rolled over to stare steadily at Marie, trying to make her
understand - believe him.  "I need this, Marie.  I'ts part of me.  Like
my hair or eyes.  It doesn't matter where it comes from, or why."

"And yah want me tah give it to yah!"  She cried, flushing.

"Remy'd love it if de femme he love share dis wi't him."  He said
softly.   Marie, eyes filling with tears, shook her head.

"Ah can't Rems.  It's so wrong - feels so wrong, like I'm hurting yah."

Remy swallowed, closed his eyes because the next part was the hardest.
"Den we can handle it diff'rent.  Remy get - get dat t'ing somewhere
else."

"Yah mean jus leave me!"

"Non.  Non - "

"What the hell then!"

"Remy get dis from someone else - der clubs, cherie where Remy find
people give him just dat.  Not a relationship.  Not love - but can give
Remy w'at -"

"What ah can't!"

"Oui!  Merde - cherie.  Don pretend - if you can't give dis to me I can
find it. An Remy love you, not wanting to be sneaking 'round in de
dark!  'Cause sooner or later Remy gonna go for it!"

"You're crazy Rems!"  Marie slid off the bed and yanked the towel off
her head, drying her hair roughly.  "You want me to just let you go off
and get - get - hell ah don't even know what yah gonna get and I don't
wanna!  Just leaving me whenever yah want!  Ain't it nice to have yah
cake and eat it too!"

"Not like dat!"  Remy shouted, exasperated.  "Want t'be w'it you, Marie
but you don want dat.  You don even w'ant to talk about it.  Don want
to even try!"

"Try!"  Marie swung around, eyes glittering with rage.  "Ah been trying
for years with you Rems.  Seeing you with all those other women!
Watching everyone's eyes on yah.  Now yah want me to - make myself as
sick as you are!  Well I ain't!  I ain't gonna do that!  It ain't love
- It ain't sex - it's fucking rape!  Or stand by and let someone else
do yah!"

"Well, if de femme ain't gonna try - Remy ain't gonna neither!"  Remy
shouted, throat tightening.  "Remy gonna get w'at he need.  W'at he
want.  And if you not gonna let him - "

"Fine!"  Marie cut him off.  "Get on outa here, Rems!  Don't wanna see
yah in here no more!  Get the hell out!"

Remy slammed out of her room, storming down the hallway, flushed with
rage and humiliation as he saw Bobby standing, stunned, on the stairs.
"W'at the hell you looking at, Chile?"

"Nothing."  Bobby mumbled, averting his eyes and hurrying to his room.

"Fuck dis place!"  Remy shouted down the empty hallway.  "Living in a
damn fishbowl.  Fuck dis!"

He slammed into his room, stumbling and sank onto the bed, weeping
until his head ached.  Always losing everything he cared about.

TBC