Travel Logs

Months: 1 - 3

It's about time to send you all a new update on the life and times of me in Oz (no, haven't met any wizards although I am starting to believe that there's no place like home). Just to get the last quip/reference over and done with: In Oz you're so far from everything that on the up-side you don't have to worry about military action spreading to its surface on the level-side one is constantly bombarded with unimportant news (up: you don't hear really bad local news, just a fuss; down: you hardly hear news from Europe (unless you tune into the multi-cultural channel where you can follow the news in English, French, Greek, Polish etc.)). On the downside the first out-of-the-country holiday destination is over 4 hours away by plane and even then I'm considering departing from Melbourne (rather than Perth) and hopping to New Zealand (I'll check out Christchurch over there next month).

People here in Melbourne are very nice and warm: I've been enjoying invitations to shabbat lunches/dinners ever since I'm here. Now with Passover starting I've got the most important meals covered. I've even led afternoon services in one of the synagogues I frequent.

This Passover week I won't have to work. I've started work in a kosher pizzeria a month ago (due to sloping economy most IT related jobs are for people with permanent residence rather than ones with a 3-month working visa). That doesn't mean I've totally given up, though. I'm registered with quite a few recruitment agencies and will be focussing on an IT-job from June until I leave for the US.

Currently I'm staying with a sometimes grumpy elderly (70) lady in a house in one of the southern suburbs of Melbourne. In June I'll relocate to a suburb more notherly. Distances are huge and walking the (straight) roads it seems all very similar to Dublin (Crumlin and Kimmage in a supposed heyday).

I don't only go on foot here, I sometimes use public transport. Since Purim, though, I have done most of my travelling/commuting by bike (wearing an icky (compulsory) helmet the likes/fashion of which I don't like to get into (even non-fashion-conscious-I am repulsed by wearing it)). Then again I don't want to find out why they are compulsory, although I can make a good guess: on some urban roads the speed limit is 70km/h ! And most cyclists I've seen, seem to think that it's supposed to be their speed-goal !

On the subject of goal, the national sport here is Australian football (footy), and unlike European football where hands are only used to throw a ball into the game and occasionally a head ticks the ball into another direction, in footy one uses hands to transport the ball, throw it to another player, catch it and a few other maneuvres. The name of the game derives itself from the facts that a foot is used to occasionally kick the ball and the fashion-conscious decision not to name it handball. The ball itself is elongated rather that a sphere to make the name confusion even more complete. In all likelihood I'll witness the first game of the season, which means that next month I'll report the same repartee.

As for spare time: the first few weeks I've visited the shops. Now, while at work and I don't have time to shop before and after, I've fallen back into my habits of reading and TV (the latter is utterly annoying at times, the intermissions are to frequent).

Months: 4

Seems like a lot has happened since the last time I wrote. First of all the weather has changed, but not to get to far ahead of myself, let's start about one and a half month ago when I finished my job at the pizzeria and left Melbourne for a holiday. I first set off to Christchurch (New Zealand) for a few days. I know that a few days did not do the place justice, but it was enough for me. The stores in Christchurch were fronts to warehouses and this most European/British town outside Europe reminded me of one town specifically: Coventry.
Although I did not go to the country-side, I believe it resembles Switzerland to a great extent (albeit this version has a coast). Quite a few people in the hostel agreed, mentioning that in die Schweiz you couldn't remove yourself from civilization as you can in NZ. Although with 60 million sheep (5 million of which have two legs), I doubt whether you really had to remove yourself from a town at all to escape mankind.

Christchurch did have a few nice things to offer though: a museum, a zoo, botanical gardens, an arts and an antarctic centre. Botanical gardens, located behind the museum, wheren't in bloom as off course it was autumn so that was to be expected. The museum had several things, for instance about the maori, the first pioneers in the southpole and a temporary exhibition on Yad Vashem righteous gentiles (their story).

The zoo was poor to say the least. Few animals and of course a display of NZ's symbol, the Kiwi (bird). This bird is reportedly shy and above all nocturnal. Suffice to say I didn't see it in the dark room (even after my eyes adjusted) and I don't think anyone has ever seen it other than in stuffed animal form (conspiracy theories abound under tourists).

The arts centre was indeed worth going to. It featured arts and crafts still actively being pursued by locals. There were weavers and fudge-bakers and the lot.

Before leaving for Sydney though, I visited the antartic centre close to the airport. I featured quite a lot of info about the formation of the south pole and NZ out of Gondwana land. This small attraction has been voted the best NZ has to offer tourism and I should have visited it on arrival (before deciding to go to the zoo).
Also in the Antarctic centre there was a set-up of snow and a wind-chill factor machine to drive the temperature to 18 degrees below zero (Celsius, for all those non SI's out there (Kelvinites wake up, it couldn't have been)). It gave me a chance to test my hypothesis: fleece jacket plus silk jacket combo. Although it did the trick and I was quite warm in the simulation, there's more later on the weather as promised.

Sydney is a lively metropolis, in contrast to solemn Christchurch, in which metro-trains, buses and mono-rails are constantly traversing below, on and above the crowded streets flanked with shopping malls. Navigating through these malls is a feat in itself. Unlike Melbourne, Sydney is predominantly hilly and through the interconnected malls you could start on the fourth floor in one and without descending stairs or elevators find yourself on the second floor two malls away.

Sydney Opera House and the Harbour Bridge are best seen from the metro/ferry-station: Circular Quays. I've gone over the bridge several times, but decided against paying the 100 dollars to work up a sweat climbing it. I didn't take a tour through the Opera house either, as I reasoned that it was nothing more than a theatre (with medium acoustics (I wouldn't hear the difference anyhow)).

From Sydney I went sightseeing in the Blue Mountains ("Katoomba", the place where I stayed the night, is just one of the examples of aboriginal names that pop up every now and then). The two hour cramped trainjourney was well worth it: not just because of the price (7 euro; the NS can learn something), but of the fantastic view along the way. Just a quarter of an hour walk from the station was a vantage point with a spectacular view. Imagine if you will, a large plain flanked by steep (Grand Canyon like) sandcoloured mountains. Now make the plain hilly and cover it in foresty green. Now in this basin drop a blueish mist.

Descending from the vantage point overlooking the "Three Sisters" and the "Blue mountains" (blue because of the blue hue the eucalyptus oils, of trees that cover the slopes of the mountains, have which load the mist) into the forests started a three hour hike.

This was nothing, though, compared to my experiences in Cairns. Starting with a 19 km walk through a tropical rainforest. Experiencing the wildlife: musquitos and leeches (all the others stayed well away from the group of tourists that pranced around). This experience dampened the Robinson Crusoe fantasies that have plagued me since childhood, yet Defoe did offer his hero a good salvage from a nearby wreck. Snorkelling near the Great Barrier Reef was equally rewarding: beautiful fish, coral formations and giant clams (bringing to mind Botticelli's Birth of Venus hanging in the Uffizi; althought the clams were upended) made up for a great experience not likely to be forgotten, although I had the foresight to bring an underwater camera.

Meanwhile I'm back in Melbourne and again looking for a job (the hours in the pizzeria were too infrequent and bound to the frequent whims of the manager), the northern hemisphere and you are experiencing summer in some form or other, here, the southern hemisphere, we're delved in winter. Although seemingly the temperatures won't drop below the double digits, there is a fair amount of shivering going on. My combination silk and fleece does hold even while cycling but without that I'd find myself shivering as well.

Actually most of the shivering that goes on is indoors, and if it isn't because of the terrible insulation of the hice (mouse, louse, spouse...), it's football fever. The Melburnians are notorious (amongst Aussies) to enjoy all kinds of sport including such a 'boring' game as soccer (that it, in my opinion, requires more skill than Aussie Rules Football is beside the point as it's supposedly scoring that adds the only enjoyment of seeing grown men running after/with a ball). Ah well, I follow part of the World Cup (Holland isn't playing so it's not much use following) and at least can admire a good goal when I see it (even if it is Off Side).

Months: 5 - 7

With my stay in Melbourne drawing to a close, a new newsletter seemed both a apropriate and long overdue.

After the World Cup the avid sporting Melburnians had the Commonwealth games to contend with and that pretty much gives a clear picture of what concerns them most in their lives.

As a friend here put it, as long as the Aussies are more concerned about sports than world-affairs Oz is a safe haven for the jews. A lot of what is happening in Europe to jewish sites of worship and so forth has entered the jewish press here and it gets equated to a pre-WW2 atmosphere. All this compassion with European jewry doesn't lift any spirits nor does it do anything to aid the situation. In which case you got to love the unconcerned Australian, who naively can hide on a autonomous island with the sense of security that his army can give him as it can hold out for three days before the yanks arrive to drive out any invading force.

On a lighter note, I've been moving around lately. After a trip to the Grampians (a mountainous range norht-west of Melbourne), I've also been to Philip Island (SSE) and toured the Great Ocean Road (WSW).

I am prepping my continuance of the trip to LA, Vegas and Ottawa (in time for New Year 5763 (Oy)). With most things packed and hardly any souvenirs (what's the point really in carrying a plastic koala mounted on a pencil all the way through the States, it's made in China anyway), it's saying 'so long', 'farewell', 'Auf Wiedersehen' and 'goodbye' to the friends I've made here.

Most of all I will miss Sally and Trevor. After Sally ate Harry, things haven't been the same in my room. Sally heartily regretted having intercourse with Harry and even more biting his head of afterwards. Trevor, another breed of a*******d (there is someone reading this that can't even stand the word especially when it's this close to it's original form) has been keeping Sally company since the unhappy event. Yet it remains to be seen whether Trevor will get the courage to ask Sally out on a date after what he's seen Sally do to Harry;-)

Months: 7 - 7 ¹/₂

America has so far seen me walking and gambling. That's both in Los Angeles (Santa Monica & Hollywood Blvd) and Las Vegas, with the latter being the place hosting the latter activity.

So after resting a weekend and getting over jetlag, I broke even in Las Vegas (i.e. I managed to win back the money that I was prepared to bet away and a wee bit more, but not a break even for my stay in Vegas let alone for my whole trip). If only I had just put the next coin in the slotmachine...

My guide-book (or what's left of it as I tore out the unnecessary pages to make my burden a little lighter (it grew by 15kg in Oz)) told me that Las Vegas would be a 'sensory overload'. This is all very well, and I was prepared for some loud music (and a lot of clanging of slotmachines), but not for a overload on my feet. The distances are huge, and yes, you can walk up and down the strip in a day seeing all the sites, but it takes hours.

The experience of walking for five minutes without the scenery changing much (yes, that's still the same casino/hotel along the side) is peculiar indeed.

Months: 7 ¹/₂ - 8

From the $trip in Vegas it's off to sober Ottawa. The perks of Ottawa, apart from spending time and the High Holydays with a close friend, can be summed up in Beaver-tails (a deepfried delicacy) and Tim Hortons' (a doughnut place). Furthermore there are the world's first Omnimax and IMAX cinemas located conveniently amidst Inuit totempoles in the Museum

Montreal was interesting as I got driven around by a friend's marihuana-pusher. Even knowing Amsterdam, this was a first. The Montrealians must be noted are very open and are generally Frencher than the French (with a driving style that would match any Parisian). To aid the pedestrians, the traffic-lights have been removed.

Vieux Montreal, a quarter, is a bit more European although the idea that you are wandering through the middle-ages is very much induced by the fact that the waiters are dressed in inn-keepers apparal.

Apart from hosting the Winter Olympics in the past the Olympic stadium in this Quebecois town is likened to a UFO by experts that saw my pictures. The metal cables that pull up the roof have been known to snap, so I hope you don't mind me not getting to close to the building for a better inspection.

The Niagara Falls didn't get an inspection as from me, with little time (1 day) in Toronto I set out to scale the CN-tower and investigate this bustling city. Note to self: Toronto is must for next time.

Months: 8 - 9

The trip to Orlando was just a few hours proving that it's a small world after all (ed.: oh come on;). Saw the sites: MGM/Disney, Epcot, Universal Studios and Kennedy Space Center.

Without further ado to Anne Rice's hideout: New Orleans. While dodging the gazes of Voodoo queens and litter on Bourbon Street one has a to keep in mind that New Orleans has had a turbulent history.

Although Baton Rouge is Louisiana's capital, New Orleans is most popular yet also the most notorious. I can't say I felt safe walking there after dusk. From dusk till dawn I therefore remained in the company of at least another person or in the hostel room which amounts to about the same thing.

Along the Mississippi (one of the world's three largest women, the others being Amazon and Miss Ouri) many a steamboat has travelled. The river at some points being as shallow as Mark Twain (I leave it as an exercise to the readers to figure out this peculiar homage to a moral author)

New York, New York! Such a wonderful place, they named it twice. Or so the song goes. When reality sets in I must admit that it is indeed the only American town I would return to for a holiday (without other reason). There is indeed so much to see in the Big Apple, it is recommended that you go over to see it yourself. The museums are huge and so are the shopping possibilities. Although it is only the sheer scale of NY which makes it unique; I would recommend Paris for serious shopping and the Louvre beats the Metropolitan museum any time of day. On that note, the British Museum houses a similar collection to that of the Met and so if you are on the European continent you shouldn't bother going to NY on only to see the Met.

The few remaining major sites are obviously bedridden with tourists so the Long Island ferry is THE option if you want to see the Statue of Liberty and leave time for other sites.

© The Mathemagician