We are but one, small, English Department at one, small, California school, yet we know we are not alone in our search for ways to describe our daily battle against ignorance. The following is but a tiny list of words and phrases we have come across which help clarify our predicament. See if this list helps you.
WWSD: Used as a secular substitute for WWJD.
The horror: Used to define a situation where little can be done to change it for the better. Used by our people throughout a typical workday at least five times each.
He's sucking up good air: Used to describe student who does nothing but irritate his teachers and classmates.
There are no rules!: Used to explain the unexplainable.
At least there is honor in [fill in blank]: Fill in blank with anything other than education
When you are right, no one remembers; when you are wrong, no one forgets. -- Irish proverb. This is one of those self explanatory sayings but very useful on a day to day basis.
Spaghetti!: Used as curse.
The letters stand for What Would Socrates Do? Some people have suggested that the S stood for Satan, but the English Department wants nothing to do with the Big Bad Guy. No, we look to Socrates for our answers. His answer would be to question everything and when things go real bad, drink hemlock. WWSD is used in situations which appear to be hopeless which means WWSD is in constant use. "Anything approaching the change that came over his
features I have never seen before and hope never to see again. Oh, I wasn't
touched. I was fascinated. It was as though a veil had been rent. I saw
on that ivory face the expression of somber pride, of ruthless power, of
craven terror - of intense and hopeless despair. Did he live life again
in every detail of desire, temptation, and surrender during that supreme
moment of complete knowledge? He cried in a whisper at some image, at some
vision - he cried out twice, a cry that was no more than a breath:
"The horror! The horror!"
From Joseph
Conrad's The Heart of Darkness:
This phrase came in vogue during the 80's when a get tough principal came in to straighten out the campus. His policies worked well until he decided to drive his car through a local Stop and Rob establishment. The DUI which followed led to the principal's leaving the district. We don't really miss the principal, but we are reminded of him daily as we discuss students who are putting a major drain on the system.
When one looks at any system one realizes in time that
rules are seldom followed consistently. Or in some cases not at all. On
first look There are no rules appears to be a cynical statement. It's only
after one thinks about all social orders one realizes that There are no
rules is just stating the obvious.
At least there is honor in ____.
This phrase was originally coined by a close friend who was working in a mental hospital during the late 70's and early 80's. The strain of countless forms being completed on people who had little chance of ever reentering the outside world coupled with the real fear concerning the actual possibility of being permanently damaged by a patient (inmate or loony, choose your PC or PIC noun) made this young man long for honest and safe work such as being a rodeo clown, a member of a bomb disposal unit or a hooker's gynecologist. Education's shift in emphasis from attempting to teach students to attempting to jump through bureaucratic hoops has made this phrase, once applicable to only the mental health field, now a necessity for keeping one's sanity while remaining in education. The knowledge that there is still honorable work left in our crumbling society is solace enough to bring us educators some dreamless sleep at night or at least during mandatory meetings.
There is a joke that PI [Politically Incorrect] people tell. "What are the first two words and Italian baby learns? The first word is spaghetti. The second word is revenge." One can see that when a teacher is harmed in any way, that his first reaction would be to ask for spaghetti!!!
If you have some lingo to
add, please send them to us so we might add them to the list.
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