One of the things I have learned about myself in the quarter-century I have been stumbling around this planet is that I am prone to occasional, yet serious, brain malfunctions.
I can give you tons of examples of such malfunctions. Buying that Vanilla Ice CD a decade ago. The shirt I wear in my mug shot. My entire last relationship.
My latest brain malfunction came last weekend. Because the Tribune didn't publish last Monday, and because I managed to get out of working at my other job that day, I was blessed with a real, honest-to-goodness day off.
Oh, the plans I had for that day ... the PLANS! I was to clean up around the house, catch up with old friends, relax and rejuvenate.
But, I had to go and speak with my friend Kelly on that Sunday night, as a group of us watched the fireworks. That was my first big mistake.
A little background about Kelly ... he has been my best friend since middle school; he is a wonderful guy. But Kelly, as good and smart as he is, has incredibly frequent brain malfunctions. In the past, he has -- and I am not making this up -- felt the need to drive to Sacramento, in the middle of the night, for breakfast.
At Denny's. In the winter. When it was snowing.
Anyway, when I am around Kelly, it seems that my brain malfunctions even more than normal. The malfunctions must be contagious or something. For example, he introduced me to my ex-girlfriend, the bastard did. So, when Kelly asked me on Sunday -- full well knowing that I wanted and needed to relax on that Monday off work -- to go on a long hike on Monday, I instantly agreed.
Do not get me wrong; I love hiking, especially in Desolation Wilderness above Lake Tahoe. It is some of the most beautiful country on this planet, and it always manages to get my malfunctioning brain on track. Therefore, in a spiffy bit of irony, I realized how truly stupid it was for me to be on the hike only when I was ALREADY ON THE HIKE.
Kelly, his wife and his mother and I chose to hike in the Mt. Tallac area, above Fallen Leaf Lake near South Lake Tahoe. It was gorgeous weather; life was good. That is until I realized I had two problems:
-- I am very white, to the point that I can get sunstroke from a new fluorescent light bulb;
-- There is less oxygen in the air at an elevation of 7,500 feet than down here at 4,200 feet.
Therefore, after we were about a quarter of the way up the hill, my body -- which is not in the greatest of shape anyway -- decided to just stop functioning properly. I kind of lost my balance, and a great deal of my energy.
This balance problem can become a real issue when you come across a creek that you have to cross on a narrow, shaky log. Let's just say I was smart enough to wade across the creek, and not dare a log crossing, which surely would have ended with a big splash and some loud, colorful words not spoken in that area of the forest for quite sometime.
Despite my fatigue and balance problems, and because I am young, strong, and -- most importantly -- really stupid, I kept going. And when all was said and done, I made it to a very gorgeous little lake where we had a wonderful lunch. We then made it back just fine.
We estimated that our hike, which lasted almost six hours, was about 12 miles round-trip. I am proud to say, I made it without any serious problems, despite my sunstroke and elevation-sickness issues.
Yeah, my feet hurt, and I need a new pair of shoes now. And we will not even discuss the mosquito bites. But in all seriousness, even though it was tough - and I truly needed a relaxing day -- I would do the hike again if I had that choice over. It is such a beautiful treat to be away from the hubbub and stress of life for a little while; I think everyone should be forced to spend a few hours in Desolation Wilderness every now and then.
I say this, and I think I am thinking soundly; however, it could just be another brain malfunction. I'll tell you for sure the next time I am in Desolation Wilderness.
Jimmy Boegle is a fifth-generation Nevadan who reminds all hikers not to be stupid and to take LOTS of water on a hike, because it sucks when you have to ration your water because you did not bring enough. Trust Jimmy; he speaks from experience. His column appears here Tuesdays, and he can be reached via e-mail at jiboegle@stanfordalumni.org.